Question, if you are a guy and start dating a girl but then she says she has decided to sexually identify as a guy, would that make you gay?

[Anonymous]

(Not based off any actual experiences)
Lets say I date a girl, it's going well, we end up in a relationship and it has been about a month together. She then identifies as a boy, would it make me gay or not?

Additionally, if you date a girl because she has boy like appearances such as short spiky hair and wears boyish clothes, would that make you gay?

NOT BASED OFF PERSONAL EVENTS, This is just a question of interest, it has never happened to me okay?

Included animes:
-Idolmaster
-Oregairu
-Shinsekai yori
-Himegoto
-Assassination classroom
-30 sai no hoken taiiku

P. s: I personally like traps in animes, they are enjoyable to guess who is a guy or girl
(Or sexually unidentified!) :)

Yes, it would (Anime- person on right is from Idolmaster and person on left is from Oregairu)

Yes, but in a roundabout way

I don't quite think so, you started dating while they were identified as a girl so... Anime- Shinsekai yori

No... I don't think? Anime- Shinsekai yori

Well, I will make a long explanation on the comment section about how i think this goes down... Anime- Himegoto

Let's go one step further and say what if you like the girl because she looks like a guy? or vice versa! Anime- Assassination Classroom

I Like Traps <3 (Anime: 30 sai no hoken taiiku)

[Anonymous]

No that wouldn't make you gay. Unless you continued to date that person after they started identifying as a boy. Then you could be bisexual or something else.

Plus dating doesn't equal attraction. A lesbian can be in a relationship with a guy to try to hide her sexuality, but she's probably never attracted to him.

[Asker]

Very true indeed :)

[Opinion Owner]

Thank you for MHO! Also, nice profile picture

[Asker]

You're welcome and thank you :)

[Hurlyburly]

I think this would be refered to as pansexual, at least if you're still attracted to them after the transition.

[Asker]

Fair point *So glad everyone is thinking hard about it* :)

[SuperTroll]

I'm leaning towards "no" because you fell for her while she was still identifying a girl and she's still biologically female. People change over time (most obvious being with age), but you tend to retain a sense of the person you fell in love with, at the time you fell for them.

[SuperTroll]

This isn't anywhere near as extreme of an example but, you know, I fell for my wife when we were both in our 20s. We've both aged a bit (though I actually haven't shown such visible signs of aging). I admit I'm a bit shallow and part of the attraction was because I found her so pretty at the time. And I still think she's very pretty but her looks have changed quite a bit over a decade of being together. I still love her because every time I see her, I still remember her like the way I saw her for the first time. I can't imagine that changing under any circumstance. Her coming out as identifying as a man would be quite extreme though -- I'm not sure how I'd respond (can't even imagine that scenario whatsoever). But it's like I couldn't help but see her the same way I did before, the same woman I fell in love with, no matter what.

[Asker]

That was so beautiful! And your point is so true! Thank you very much :) I hope you are both living wonderful lives <3

[Clowr]

On the first I would say Bi, on the second, no. One do lime their females abit more tomboy.

[Asker]

I had to do a double take on this because I was checking what you may have meant by lime but I figured it out, you meant to write like didn't you? :)

[Clowr]

Lol yeah ^^ autocorrect. Missed the k aperently and it auto corrected to lime xD

[Asker]

We all make mistakes :p

[Clowr]

Do a lot cause of laziness ^^ Insted of switching the dictionary back and fort between English, German and my native language, I have forced it all into one.

So my autocorrect is quite confused from time to time ^^

[Asker]

Oh dear indeed :) Is Germany a nice place? I hear from friends the food is good ^_^

[Clowr]

Can't complain. And cheap. Winter ain't cold but the summer can be to hot.

Found out many Germans don't speak a lot of English, so got to try and stumble forth in German. Even some of the police and medical don't speak it.

Quiet frustrating when you need to call and ambulance and try to explain the severe wound or what not.

[Asker]

I wish England was cheap :D Although I am rather fond of winter being cold, I am a lover of low temperatures compared to high temperatures. >_<

That is most definitely inconvenient, incidentally I thought German was your native language so my apologies :)

I can imagine trying to explain such a situation in improvised German about a, I don't know a broken femur :D

[Clowr]

Same. Prefer the winter cold. A winter here is like a Norwegian autumn ^^

Nah. German ain't my native language. No worries about it ^^
Is my English grammar that bad? XD

Already been to a adult shop and was shopping for the misses. Don't recall what it was the first time, but a few specific toys.

I am very glad she spoke English and I did not have to stumble forth and try and show it all with body language.

[Asker]

I have never been to Norway so I am unsure but from you describing it like an Autumn, I assume it is not that cold?

Your grammar isn't that bad at all! I feel like I have dug my self a hole here :p

That most DEFINITELY would be a difficult explanation scenario if they didn't understand it, hope you both have fun :)

[Clowr]

Haha. Yeah. It's about 3 - -5 celsius during the winter here. Worst was -10 I think. Still not bad. Can say it is a autumn as on the Scotish coast. A bit stingy now and then with the winds.

Sorry, I just had to, got it served on a silver platter ^_^ Could not contain it hehe.

[Asker]

That is a temperature that I do not envy, ours are usually around 5-3 degrees Celsius and don't apologise, it made me laugh :)

[OlderAndWiser]

Depends on how you respond once she makes her announcement.

[Asker]

Well, if you stay with them afterwards out of loving them so much, I still don't know if it would be considered gay :/

If you left them after their announcement, that would not make you gay? While also making you a bad person for leaving the person you love due to their sexual identification :/

[OlderAndWiser]

The person I am in love with is a woman. If they suddenly announce that they want to be a a man:

1. They know that I am 100% heterosexual and that shit is not gonna fly with me.

2. They have been portraying themselves also as 100% heterosexual and now they are suddenly revealing something that is a huge shock. A fraud has been perpetrated on me.

3. Why am I a bad person if I leave them? Why aren't they the bad person for pulling this fraud on me?

Stop letting CNN and other media indoctrinators tell you how to think PC and start thinking for yourself.

[Asker]

Shitting hell, you got very enthusiastic for a moment there mate! 0_0 :D

[killmejerusalem]

I've actually experienced exactly this. My girlfriend of 3 years whom I planned on marrying came out as always feeling more comfortable being seen as a boy. We broke it off amicably and now he is my best friend. It doesn't make me gay because they were always very feminine during our time together, and when the transition started, we ended it.

[Asker]

That was genuinely a beautiful story, thank you for sharing it and I hope he is doing well :)

[ENTP_EMO]

Let's go one step further and say what if you like the girl because she looks like a guy? or vice versa! Anime- Assassination Classroom

[Asker]

Fair choice :)

[YvanKarma]

ISSA TRAAAAAAP. lol

The traps are cute though.

[Asker]

They are! :)

[YvanKarma]

Yeah i love `em. I actually know a few :)

[Asker]

Well the first that come to mind for me are

Killua Zoldyk (Hunter Hunter) When I first watched it, I thought he was a girl :p

Ciel Phantomhive (Black butler) For obvious reasons he appears female :D

Nagisa Shiota (Assassination classroom) He looked so much like a girl even the class thought he was :D

Those are the first ones that come to mind for me, what are yours? :)

[YvanKarma]

Well, i was actually talking about in real life traps :) lol

But as far as Anime traps goes

Haku from Naruto
Fisheye from Sailor Moon
Kazuto Kirigaya from Sword Art Online
and Load Galax from

[YvanKarma]

Gatchaman Crowds

[Asker]

What real life traps do you know? Now we are on the same page I can confirm I also know some real life traps but now I thought harder I realised we shouldn't be giving names of people so how about we just say where we met them, college, school, neighbourhood etc. but not say the actual college and locations :)

Mine were 4 people in my year at my high school and 2 were biologically boys but had their hair style in such a long fashion and dyed colours that seemed feminine and their bodies were actually very feminine too structure wise. The other 2 were biologically girls but had short hair and played in football while having rather flat chests making one think they were guys :p They weren't too offended when I asked though :)

It came to college and there was like 12 traps because the college is so big and 3 were biologically girls, the rest were biologically guys, a LOT of guys have tricked me and still do sometimes because there is no dress code in the college everyone comes in with very random attire, but hey they still look attractive :)

[YvanKarma]

Well i only know the femboy kind. And i only know one in person here in my country. The rest is via twitter ^_^ heheheh. And that is about as much detail i have for yah. If only i was in their area :)

[Asker]

That is most certainly fine :) detail on such subjects should be kept to a minimum to prevent other people getting unwanted levels of knowledge about you and the ones you care about :)

[YvanKarma]

Yeah i suppose :)

[alice55]

I don't think it would make you gay

[Asker]

Thank you :)

[alice55]

You're welcome :)

[omgjassy]

No cause she still has an v

[NovissimumVirorum]

It's gayer than gay

[Asker]

@NovissimumVirorum Why are you like this? :D

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum yeah why

[Asker]

Because he is fun to have around :) even with his quirky personality ^_^

[omgjassy]

Quirky?

[NovissimumVirorum]

Stop bullying me Jastity

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum how can one bully a bully

[NovissimumVirorum]

I'm not a bully

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum sure

[NovissimumVirorum]

You're a bully for calling me a bully

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum whatever

[Asker]

Neither of you are a bully, we are simply having some light hearted humour <3
Jassy, no need to go on the defensive
Novi, you don't need to claim being bullied when no-one is being offensive to you <3

Are we good? :)

[omgjassy]

How am I being defensive?

[NovissimumVirorum]

We are all bullies

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum your mom bullies you

[NovissimumVirorum]

Your mom bullies me

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum how dare you😮

[NovissimumVirorum]

Your grandma bullies me

[Asker]

@NovissimumVirorum This feels like a lost cause :D Have fun with your back and forth couples argument and @omgjassy I only thought you were a tad defensive <3

[omgjassy]

How though @aguy

@novi no your grandma

[Asker]

It was just the part where you said whatever, almost sounded like you were annoyed so I was trying to lighten the scenario :)

Why is everyone fixated on grandmas? T_T

[omgjassy]

K...

[NovissimumVirorum]

The entire community of Dutch Indonesians bullies me

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum sucks to be you

[NovissimumVirorum]

There's what like 1.5 of you

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum what

[NovissimumVirorum]

You and half of @tartaarsaus

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum I don’t understand

[NovissimumVirorum]

Dutch Indonesians

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum what about it

[NovissimumVirorum]

Because you said it sucks to be me

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum yeah so?

[NovissimumVirorum]

Just saying I can take on 1.5 Indonesians

[omgjassy]

@NovissimumVirorum what is 1.5 Indonesians

[Asker]

1 Indonesian and a half perhaps? However, I don't know how Novi plans on halving an Indonesian... Perhaps he meant one adult Indonesian and a child... ?

[omgjassy]

Lmao

[NovissimumVirorum]

Cut Tartaarsaus down the middle

[Asker]

@NovissimumVirorum Why you trying to get Tartaarsaus involved in this? :D

[NovissimumVirorum]

He's half Indonesian

[Asker]

@NovissimumVirorum Ah, okay, question answered and cleared :)

[AlexEfron]

That's too much for my brain to process.

[Asker]

My sincerest apologies :)

[AlexEfron]

What would you do if it happened with you?

[Asker]

If I dated a girl and she identified as a boy, we would stay together and work through it, unless she also said she wanted to date girls in which case I would like to believe we would separate on good terms :)

[AlexEfron]

I see 🤔

[Xoirwinkan]

Doesn't matter what she identifies as (except for mental issues). She is a female.

[andreasderjuengere]

'Gay' is a decision - not a condition.

[NovissimumVirorum]

You gay

[Asker]

You're so unbelievably blunt it is amazing how you do it! :D

[NovissimumVirorum]

*sassily snaps fingers*

[Asker]

*Snaps fingers WITH finger guns pointed at you*

[ivanhunterjo]

I like traps

[Asker]

They are nice :)

[ivanhunterjo]

Also it doesn’t make you gay.

[Asker]

Thank you for voting :)

[ivanhunterjo]

That’s okay 👌

[grega239]

It would make me single