Is it considered cheating if the relationship is already dead?

[LonewolfMeme]

What do you think?

[D_Bone_Steak]

Cheating is simply breaking the rules of an agreement. Nothing more or nothing less. My first question to the cheater is..."If you're really ready for it to be over, why can't you break it off and then go fuck that other person instead of fucking that other person and trying to hide it while keep the original relationshit?"

The question answers itself. They weren't ready for it to be over. They wanted to keep it and fuck other people. I think the cheated get hurt the most because they realize they also could've been out looking for people to fuck and the pleasures of flesh, but they actually stuck to the deal to deny themselves for a person that wanted them to deny themselves but had no intention of returning the favor.

I mean seriously... cheaters are some real assholes that just want to get more points... just like kids playing tag or some game... the cheater makes up rules just so they and they alone get to win. They're assholes, and they make the entire game not fun to the point that you see kids quitting and not even wanting to participate. Sitting in a park watching these kids, can explain a lot about adults and their major issues.

... Basically, if the game got boring, quit and bounce out. No need to cheat just so you can get more wins.

[Anonymous]

You should really make sure it's "dead". My girlfriend has borderline so I know she has a hard time putting things in perspective. We had a rough time a while back and at a party at our place, she got drunk and went completely crazy. She was yelling it was over and I had to leave. That led to me having to drive drunk and getting pulled over, even spending a night in jail. She stayed at home, thought it was "over" cause she said so and I don't come back that night (because jail) and my giant asshole of a colleague thought it was a good idea and make a move on her. So yeah, while I was spending a night in jail, she was getting fucked from behind on the kitchen counter by my asshole colleague. We talked about everything and ended up back together (not so dead after all). We are still getting over this slowly, step by step. The main problem is that she doesn't see it as cheating (borderline doesn't help either), while to me it hurts just as much... And my colleague telling everyone about what an ass she had, definitely doesn't help.

So just think about what you do, because it can really hurt the other.

[EllaLouisee]

Yes!!!

There is no if, buts or maybes
When you are in a relationship it doesn't matter if you grow apart or the relationship is "dead" you both joined a partnership and if you are not happy then leave, don't stray or look around for afterwards just leave. I will never understand the people who say " i wasn't happy/ i was lonely/ i didn't feel loved that's why i cheated" these are excuses and it says more about that person how they have no concern for anyone else, they just want to be with multiple people they just use that excuse and expect you to believe they didn't mean it

End of the day if the relationship is dead then leave! Or sort it out together! Don't be selfish and hurt someone else because your not happy!

[CubsterShura]

Depends on what you mean by the relationship is 'dead'.

No matter what good or bad you're going through. Either you are in a relationship or you're not. It's that simple. You shouldn't be cheating no matter what if you haven't officially broken up yet, like my ex cheated on me when he was 'getting hopeless' about things working between us. And if you aren't in a relationship you are free to do whatever you like. After dumping my ex, despite a possibility of me getting back with him after we sort out some things together I was already looking out and asked another guy out for a date, because unless I truly get back with him I don't have any relationship to stay exclusive to.

[Cynicaldreamer]

Are you still in a relationship and dating said person?

If so, then YES, that is cheating!!!

Until you end the relationship with said person and you're no longer with them, being with another person emotionally or physically is considered cheating.
Just do your partner a favor and end things instead of hurting them.

[LonewolfMeme]

I'm kinda guilty of doing so emotionally but he was just my friend at the time and I explained my that and he got mad and defensive about it (he was dating his "female friend") I was mad when I found out but I at the same time I knew we were coming to an end but didn't know how to end it or if he felt that way

[OlderAndWiser]

1. Has there been a promise of faithfulness. exclusiveness, monogamy, etc?
2. Has there been an explicit break up in which at least one partner said "this is over and I'm moving forward with my life."
3. If not, do the circumstances make it clear that the relationship is finished?
4. Is there any history of a break up/make up cycle with this couple?

[Pinay_ako]

If it's dead, why not break up? It's still cheating if you are technically still in a relationship with your partner...

[darshan185]

Not reallY. If the guy has Put in all his efforts to save but it's not working.!

[Pinay_ako]

@darshan185 yea so break it off.

[darshan185]

The girl Should do it because she's at fault.!

[LonewolfMeme]

@darshan185 this was in a past relationship the guy left me hanging for 2 months before saying he was dating someone else but kept saying he lived me and that I was special.

[LonewolfMeme]

Loved*

[darshan185]

Then it's a case of cheating. NO Point being in this kindoff relationship.
Even if he doesn't break up you can take a stand and just end without even giving him reason.!!

[sejla]

Yes it is considered cheating if you haven't ended the relationship you are in. If you find someone you like better end the current one you are in and then date the other person.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

If you are still together, no matter what problems you may be having, it is cheating.

[SMOOTHBROTHER]

You need to make it clear that this relationship is over then move on with your life. unless you want to be in a open relationship and you both agree on it. if the relationship is dead why not spice it up. this is the perfect chance to explore and rediscover your mate. look into things like body painting and rediscover your mates body, bring toys into the bedroom. go outside and have a water gun fight. mingle with other couples you have the same interest with go out on dates and trips in groups with other couples. make a movie with your mate or film your mate doing her favorite activity.. take a class together or with other couples. role play with your mate dress up like the Flintstones and go though your day treating your mate like Wilma walk around the house and say yaba Daba Doo... act like the TV show Martian and you both role play endless ideas and couples to mimic.. you both have history together don't end the relationship UNLESS SOME IS ABUSIVE, CHEATING OR VIOLENT... if it's none of those keep moving.. yes there will be days when you don't want to be together but you both work though those days.. especially if you both feel relaxed around each other and can be yourself with no judgement of each other and you both can except each other flaws and all. if you been with your mate a long time. please don't call it quits... sometime thing get better with time

[AngelGabe]

I think @OlderAndWiser made some great points, but I'm not entirely on the same page:

I think it becomes pretty clear at certain points in relationships when the fires out. Verbal communication I think fundamentally is the most responsible choice of action and I want that clear. Saying it's over is always better than acting like it is. Especially from the outside-in. BUT, any self respecting person knows when things are over and trying to sell the pretense they aren't is childish. But that's something that comes with age and experience.

[finds-raus]

3 moments when cheating is Ok.

1. U wake up and find ur self on a first class flight to Cuba 🇨🇺 and Natalie Portman is next to u and asks u to do it in the plane toilet.

2. Ur car changes in front of ur eyes into a transformer and Megan Fox comes around the corner and asks u to defeat the world against aliens. ( not allowed if ur car was a Toyota before. Just, Mercedes, Lamborghini and Bugatti. Audi is a grey area)

3. when u find out ur girlfriend cheated on u with ur best friend and He has a sister.

[October808]

What's the 3rd.

[BuckWild]

Absolutely. Everyone at least deserves to know that the relationship is over. If you don't tell them, then that makes you a deceptive filthy liar. Keep your honor intact and respect people by letting them know that you're not secretly doing things behind their back. It's the lies and deception that are most hurtful to the betrayed partner. Not the affair itself.

[LonewolfMeme]

Yea I agree. A lot of people might be thinking I cheated but I haven't I was referring to my ex and didn't want to pit him in a question

[rayjinazn]

Yes and no. If it's dead one sided its arguable cuz other side still wants it to work but if ur asking this question, it's not really dead on ur side either cuz there's always that little ounce of it left that clings on you that keeps you stay in touch.

[LonewolfMeme]

Oh no I'm asking this question because my experience cheated months ago and we were in a "dead" relationship at the time yet wouldn't let me go while I was trying to find a way out.

[rayjinazn]

So u moved on because both of u came to an agreement? But he or she is still clingy?

[rayjinazn]

Or they moved on during the great depression but keeps coming back for more?

[LonewolfMeme]

He wouldn't let go while I did 2 months before that faithed day because I knew he wasn't for me

[rayjinazn]

But either way, I mean if its come to an agreement, u have nothing to say. Nobody likes a two face. My ex called it done. I tried to win her back. But I did my best and dont have the patience anymore. Yet she talks mad shit about me and made a reputation for me at her community. Good lord I was surprised I was that famous. So shell find a lame excuse to accuse me and be mad at me. Blocks me. I'm like, ok like blocking me on phone and facebook really hurts me. Lol. I'm not 12 anymore. If u say it is, then it is. After all, she claimed she ain't bitch crawling back to her masters house, which I never said anything like that to her. But she can't go more than 6 days at tops without calling me. But i gave up hoping. Either they in or they out. It becomes a bad habit. So just ask them 1 simple question and tell them to answer it honestly whole heartily. If they need to sleep on it, let them. "Are you in? Or you out? U done? Or u want more pie? Cuz once you make a choice u gotta live with it whether u can or can't." And if they giving you excuses saying what ifs. Throw in the most unanswerable question. "Can rivers run backwards? No Can it dry up? Yes. Can it reproduce waters again? Yes. Is it the same water? No" there u go. Rivers dont go back. Neither should u. Even if it does run back miraculously, can it dry up? Yes same with feelings. Can it come back? Yes but its not the same feelings anymore. Once a person been lied to and manipulated by an individual, that individual can't be trusted no more no matter how different they may be I. 30 years time.

[LonewolfMeme]

Yes but there's factually are rivers that flows "backwards" or south to North

[rayjinazn]

Of course. Which is why its arguable to say that old habits die hard. Lol. My ex that I had mentioned giving me the cold shoulder and all that. I'm cool with it. I mean, at least I got an answer so I know which way to go. But shell have me over once in a while to bring her to Heaven. I dunno why but lately she's been responding to older men who seems more mature only to find out theyve had 6 marriages and guys who talks like they just came out of the nut house cuz dude talks like he got a pound of dip in his mouth. Or like a pound of water. So, I dunno. She say its over but rivers do run back if the stars align. Lol I guess I can only imagine the kid doesn't have a tongue and the old man doesn't know how to eat sushi and had ED. there's a reason I got the nickname rayjinazn (raging asian)

[rayjinazn]

Yea so it sound like he still wants u.

[rayjinazn]

There's only 1 way to kill off rodents who keep on hanging around after using a gazillion methods. I mean, I was clingy too once but like I said all I need is one solid answer. But for some, you need more than words. Sorry this method is out of bounds. Only cuz I had to literally get my hands dirty and get caught red handed. But you do it if u have to. Once upon a time in orange county, ca I made a sex tape. Initially I was to finish and make an anonymous email to send to her. But I didn't get to finish the recording or finish my load and she showed up on my deck while my bootycall was bent over on the dinner table in the dining room. I was hoping more of a sad ending but no she went ballistic and used every godamn curse word in the book neighbors call police fearing for my safety. Lol more or less I never heard from her again after her last phone call.

[LonewolfMeme]

yea well my current boyfriend would probably pick a fight if my ex came back (I doubt he will tho since he just completely stopped caring. it's funny because my current boyfriend liked me days after talking to me and waited patiently for me to sort stuff out with my ex but my ex couldn't even try to work shit out and obviously had some guilt because he didn't end the relationship when he started his new one. According to him my family was being difficult and I was being a stuck up bitch.

[rayjinazn]

Yea. there's a lot of miscommunication in shit like this. Well if he fucked up, and he's got no logical explanation. Bye felicia! Either way for future references and maybe you could give it a try with a few untrustworthy people in your life, do a little reverse psychology. You'll be amazed how quick their answers become different and irrelevant. Point is if he's slow witted, sure give him tomorrow to explain. Even a genius needs more than 24 hours to come up with an alibi. But, if he ain't, and it's the truth, he wouldn't hesitate to speak. But the doubts shouldn't end there. 1. Kindly ask about the subject vaguely. 2. If a specific something catches your interest, ask for very specific details about it but leave out anything that encounters is ex. Went running. Specifics: with black nike shox 11. Size 9. Lol its pretty anal but the next part will make them off track. 3. Where? With who? Conversations? 4. Specifics on activities happening during running or down time like water breaks or taking piss. 5. When? How long? And then depending on the issue at hand, knowing their routines or just looking at their behavior on how they're moving, their eyes darting. Not making eye contact studder or pretending go forget uncertain word or stalling, you can ask "really? That's not what he said/she said". If they're surprised and get all defensive, it's usually the truth or some parts of it. If they're pretty calm about you pretending to know about it, that's straight up a no go. if there's more to the story, well, repeat steps 1-4. Usually works on people who are dishonest. Not one person, good or bad had ever been able to keep anything from me. Even though I never made it to become a cop, those psychology classes kinda paid off a little. Tells you who's your family and who's your frenemy. Lol. Years later I was able to distinguish trustees and untrustees without them knowing. But what I told u is merely a glimpse of what the cops use.

[rayjinazn]

And I guess he's right in a way about that. I mean, their version is then right one for them. But then again no body ever though of listening to your version huh? It usually how goes. In your situation. Your parents were being honest to God being what inlaws actually do. Lol. You being a stuck up bitch. Well. Aren't we all? Metaphorically yes. Were humans it's what we do sometimes. Being a stubborn pain in the ass. But literally, no. Cuz only actual bitches do you dirty, say they too good and take off, only to find then scratching on your door or blowing up your phone. Hence I got blocked Sunday night and just now got a text, "honey I miss you". For people like you and me who others like to make us famous for a irrelevant reason. Let them. They got a mouth let them talk. It's not like we got a throne to defend. Lol eventually all the BS people hear will disappear because sooner or later they'll begin to see your actions, go home and do homework. And then it'll all make sense

[rayjinazn]

And tell ur boyfriend do not engage. Cuz that's exactly what the ex wants. He makes a move and dudes got leverage. Besides, this little charade ur ex is doing, its just between you and him. And as much as I wanna send my good friends Mr Noah and Miss Anna to handle transactions, I feel its your spot to take and make your statement clear and solid. That way you and ur boyfriend hands stay clean.

[MusicMayhem]

Hell yes it's cheating. Monkey branching isn't cool, don't do it. It just makes you a pathetic loser who has a fear of loss and can't handle being single in the interim period between a relationship ending and finding a new one. That and you can't handle an adult conversation about a relationship to try fix things.

[MissDawn7961]

to be fair , if the relationship is dead then end it with them so that each person can go on with their own life ! however it may be that the other person in the other relationship does not want to end it out of fear that they will not get their needs met at all by anyone ! everyone in the relationship is just using the other one in one way or another and that is why there are three in it and not just two ! Thanks

[Aguysopinion4799]

Well, yeah.
I mean, even if the relationship is "Dead" you are still in a relationship, so if you start looking for others before cutting off the relationship, that's still cheating.

It isn't a case of if you aren't enjoying the relationship it's okay to look for others, it's a matter of if you aren't enjoying the relationship, you break up and then look for others.

[CurLyF]

Yes. As long as you are under the agreement you are still exclusively dating, you need to respect that. If the relationship is already dead it takes nothing from you to officially break it off and then do whatever you like. Always do it the right way and you'll feel better.

[Screenwriter]

I think people use this excuse to embark on relationships when the old relationship isn't officially over. It's a bad idea. Separated isn't divorced. Divorced isn't necessarily OVER the old relationship. If it's TOO close to the death date of the relationship, it's probably not the best time to start a new one. It takes a few months to a year or so to get over somebody. Mourning is best done alone. You might be able to be friends with someone. But serious? Unlikely.

[vxlsir]

Cheating is cheating If it's dead end it, no point in traumatizing someone don't play any games just end it and let them move on with thier lives... life is short when you get older you will realize just how short it is, so don't waste other people's lives

[LonewolfMeme]

I'm aware of this

[vxlsir]

Then why ask?

[LonewolfMeme]

Bc my experience did that which I didn't understand

[LonewolfMeme]

Ex**

[vxlsir]

I've been there to

[Reaperbot666]

Was there an official break up moment?

If marriage did the people in question get legally divorced? A separation does not often count as a divorce. So if your only separated physically or legally. You can still married to each other. Therefore any cheating sexual or otherwise. Can be turned against you in the count room.

Same religion do not allow divorce. So any form of cheating sexual or otherwise. Is looked down on by others of the same faith.

[EmbraceThePain]

If you’re in a relationship, it’s cheating. I would recommend having a clear breakup before you seek out another person. It doesn’t matter what you think of the relationship, but if you’re in one then you’re in one.

[serious]

Logically speaking yes. That is because neither of the partner has ended the relationship yet.

However if things have become so bad that the relationship is dead then it is better to exit the relationship rather than cheat.

[LonewolfMeme]

Me and my ex didn't talk or see each other for 2 whole months and when we did we argued and I tried to make it work just to find out he's dating his female friend behind my back (i didn't get mad) but I mention a guy friend who I'm starting to like and was willing to push those feelings aside and so was the guy to make my relationship work my guy friend wanted to help me make it work too (ex got mad and started being a dick any him calling ugly and saying he looks like pennywise when in reality my guy friend is more put together than my experience and my family actually likes him unlike my ex (my guy friend went from friend to boyfriend over the course of 2-3 months while all this happened.

[MandalaGirl]

Dude, you’re only 15... if you don’t like the girl anymore then you have to tell her. It will hurt her less if you be honest. If she finds out you’re cheating on her with someone else imagine how much more upset she’ll be?

[LonewolfMeme]

First off I'm a girl and I'm not cheating on anyone. I was referring to my ex who started a relationship before we officially ended ours.

[MandalaGirl]

Apologies. My ex did the same thing... it’s quite shit huh? A year has passed now and I’m still getting over it.

[LonewolfMeme]

yea but i was over him 2 months before we ended things.