Do you often see the dynamics of love between men and women play out this way? Or do the dynamics play out differently in your experience and/or opinion?
Primarily, a man loves you for you, and a woman loves you for what you do. True or False?
No. The guy I was talking to for a year didn’t have a stable home and was working odd hours just to pay bills. I on the other hand have a corporate job. But I loved and still love him for who he is. I see the same with my friends from college and their partners. They all met relatively young when neither could support the other. It’s possible to find someone who genuinely loves you. Marriages of convenience happen, but generally both parties are aware and consent.
From what I've seen and experienced, men tend to expect things and base a woman's value on appearance or experience or something like that and they often have a hard time allowing themselves to love someone... Whereas women tend to care more about a person's inner personality and spirit and for the most part are able to overlook things because they love others so much... But again, everyone is different and I've seen guys this way and girls that way so...
Successful relationships require work. Each person loves the other for who they are. As a result they have needs and are able to do things to satisfy the needs of their partner. So to answer your question the love is based on the person but the strength of the relationship is often based on communication and fulfillment of needs. Take away that work or that love and the relationship fails.
100% true. Men love idealistically. Women love opportunistically. She doesn't care about you. She cares only about what you provide for her. "you dont do anything for me" how many times has every man heard a girlfriend saying that while screeching like a retard?
I will say that at least from my perspective, it seems against today's cultural norms for a man to complain that way about how his girlfriend or wife doesn't do anything for him.
YESSSSS. Men love idealistically. Women love opportunistically. They're all in as long as it makes them FEEL happy. If that changes they'll shut down sexually, cheat bail or any combination. The burden of performance is on the man. For EVERYTHING. Figure if you get sick, hurt, or lose your job, she'll bail. Just look what they do with their men in the military on deployment. OMFG The concepts of loyalty and commitment are nebulous terms for the female brain. It is ALWAYS about the FEELZ. How many times have you heard the "I love him but I'm not IN love with him." Or, "I'm just not hhhaaapppyyyy."
@R_Cakes91 - I can read you like a book honey. I have a Ph. d in life experience. You're just a noobie. These things are in plain sight - just watch for them. And women LOVE to play the victim-card. They're just sure they are somehow a victim. EVERYTHING in their life is the fault of someone or something uncontrollable. Watch for the word-tracks.
Well personally I love my husband for who he is, to name just a few the man that makes me feel happy, contented, safe, secure and about to become the father of our first child.
False. But I can see where you're coming from. I guess society juedges men more by what they do and women more by how they look (I'm generalizing here). But love is foreign to all that ☺️
False. Both, men and women, love their partners for who they are. Neither would I call it love when you're only with someone solely because of their appearence nor because of their income.
FALSE I am a girl who loves my man just the fucking way he is and nothing more and nothing less , I don't love him for what he does even though he may look handsome cute hot sexy etc.. Loving him for what he does in my eyes is just wrong
I love my girlfriend for who she is and would marry her tonight if I could... but she’s admitted she’ll only marry me if I “better my career” even though I have a stable job 😒😒😒
@StephenCF i can even marry with you right now if it was possible😔😔i just want to smell your neck, kiss your lips and sleep in your strong manly arms💪😍
@StephenCF right now, i do know you and accept you for who you are. i do love you for who you are😍and im proud of you💪your job doesn't matter. but when it comes to marriage everything becomes more serious. as i said my family wants me to marry with a man who has a college degree&good job (especially doctor). but your job doesn't matter, you don't have to be a doctor if you don't want, it wouldn't create a problem😊. just a college degree and a good paid job would be enough (NOT high paid, just good (normal) paid would be enough) and also im going to college so i would want to marry with a college degreed person. anyway, we talked about this subject before when we just met, while were friends and knowing each other, as i said i just want you to accomplish your dreams that's why i thought you should go to the college cos you were talking about you wanted the study English lit a lot in the past but you couldn't enter the college and it made me sad, that's why i wanted the courage you about going to college part.
@StephenCF i really don't want to control you and my aim wasn't that. but you were the one who complains about his job, that's why i just tried to help you for to find a solution. that's why i talked about college. my aim wasn't controlling your life. and it's your life so you can do anything you want😉🙂i do love you for who you are right now❤
Everyone is different, regardless of gender. Men and women love each other for different reasons, some are good, some are bad. But they should love each for who they are and whatever good things they do.
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0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
False. If that were true I’d like every medic I came across which is obviously ridiculous. It’s the person that attracts me.
It's true but we can't blame women. It's men who always try to win women over by showing off their achievements instead of finding someone who actually cares about them. Some women just don't like us and we shouldn't try to convince them to like us
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Men love women cuz we can make babies for them. Men love other men cuz they have a strong desire for them.
I cannot recall anyone telling me they loved me for what I can do but how my character makes them love me. Then with me, I'd never fall in love if it was all about what they 'brought'. No, it is her character (and even little mannerisms) which cause me to feel as I do towards her. There is nothing in the world like feeling yourself light up at the mere sight of the one you love and seeing the same effect occur within them as they see you too.
a man loves a woman for her genetic material. a woman loves a man for his ability to provide during the time she will spend reprudicing his genetic material.
No,, when you fall in love, as a man or woman, from my experience, you gall online with the other person for who they are, the good, the bad and the ugly as you know all of that makes them who they are.
Jesus, you’re thick. You’re setting up a false dichotomy based on your hatred of women, I’m guessing. Get off the incel sites and actually talk to them.
But you are not explaining how you are making these conclusions of hating women. If you reason it out, then I might see where you are coming from. I don't follow how you can make such assertions based a question since a question is not a statement.
It seems clear to many people that the sexes think and behave differently. At least the view that the sexes have differences that need to be acknowledged is valid, I think. I don't think we explore these differences enough anymore and it leads to a lot of misunderstanding about identity, purpose or generally what's what in my opinion.
“Seems clear” isn’t remotely scientific. But since we share 98% of genes with bananas I think gender is mostly bs. There’s the obvious differences, then we’re all the same.
If I recall, we all have the same hormones, but the difference is in their balance; we all know males have higher testosterone and we all know females have higher estrogen. Hormonal balance affects behavior and thus it must have influence on our thinking. You can even see the behavioral differences in boys and girls, even if you raised them the same way. In early and mid 20th century, girls were thought of as "dumber" than boys in school. Then they implemented teaching strategies based on "female learning" in all or most schools in the nation. And now you see a new imbalance where boys and men are seen as dumber, with women and girls being most graduates in the world and with the best grades. In the most egalitarian societies in the world, we "paradoxically" happen to see the greatest gender differences in professional fields. hmmmm.
I use the word "idealistic" because I think monogamy itself is an ideal or is idealistic; our love hormones are shown to only last about 20 years for us biologically, not forever. And the vast majority of relationships don't make it that far. So I believe it's important to understand our differences and where our disconnects may be.
I'm confused about what you mean, but my guess is that "understand our differences" sounds elementary, obvious and/or cliché in your opinion. But while I was being brief, "understanding our differences" takes on a whole different meaning when you consider the potentially innate psychological factors, given that so many of us were taught to ignore our differences all our lives.
Unless you were referring to my original question, which would make less sense, since a question is not declarative.
Great comment. I can see why people think that, but it requires what you do to include that which no one can see unless either time, circumstances or you reveal it anyway.
I think it plays into the idea that for example, the smallest act of kindness is worth more than the world's greatest intentions. This saying isn't wrong necessarily, but I think we can fool ourselves into thinking that the invisible things like intention does not have value. It absolutely does, because parts of our being like thoughts, emotion primarily, and intention cause action in the first place.
But I've seen that it doesn't always translate into physical evidence for whatever reason like circumstances restrictions, barriers. We have words like procrastinator, or workaholic, etc. But if that's authentically who someone is, how do we explain change? In order to change, you'd have to actually be something else that can then take the shape of one image to another. And in that way, being is a verb, but personally I don't equate that to the soul.
We can certainly appreciate physical evidence and interpret what it means to us, but that doesn't mean we actually know the truth behind the evidence. So while there is a line, I think labeling people regardless of their humanity, circumstances and conditions have been part of what's justified so many atrocities and injustices that carry on to this day.
But all we can know about a person is what we can detect with our 5 senses. What I try to do is educate myself on the human condition and look at the little things about people, how they act when it doesn't cost much or anything. If it seems their consciousness is benign, I accept and value them.
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