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You know, after observing men and women, I've come to a certain conclusion. Men and women simply communicate differently. Women communicate a lot with emotion and body language, I stead of being blunt and up front. That's just how women are. And they are more sensitive to that sort of communication as well. Men, however, are rarely good at that and are generally upfront. And... As fate would have it, both sides expect the other to be like them. Not all women "play mind games", they just don't understand why a man cannot understand what she thinks she is very clearly communicating because she herself excels at that form of communication, so the assumption is "if he can't understand the obvious, he must either not care or not be listening", and to the woman that's frustrating. I myself have been accused of being manipulative and beating around the bush at times when I thought I was communicating quite clearly.
By the way these traits aren't always strictly men/women thing. It's a spectrum, and it's just more common for women to be on one end and men the other, that tends to be how our brains are. But it can still range to the point where there are some couples on completely opposite sides to that. It's still not that abnormal but more rare.
@BirdieBeep Well said.. I agree women communicate emotionally and then expect men to somehow read their minds. in my opinion having a more direct approach would solve a lot of the issue however I'm not sure if that's realistic. Do you believe that women know they play a lot of mind games but just refuse to admit it?
I don’t think women have a monopoly on mind games. I do however believe that we are better at it than men. Guys played the type of Mind Games early in the relationship they lie and say that they own a company and they’ve just developed a new app app, or that there’s some kind of royalty back in their home country or that they earn more than they do. None of which matters to me I have my own money in. We on the other hand tend to do the whole, when you ask us what’s wrong we say “nothing“ when there really is but that one I think is mostly because we don’t want an argument. Now, why do we say “nothing“ instead of simply being honest and saying “look I don’t wanna have an argument right now so let’s just drop it “ I have no idea why we do that! I guess it’s one of those things where if you love her, you just man-up and deal with it.
just try monopoly. It makes everyone miserable faster
I think women have the monopoly. Guys are pretty straightforward everyone knows what they want they just have to use misdirection and finesse to get it. Woman need to use mind games because they are driven so much by emotion.
@Vegasrunner Right, okay sure… You say “misdirection and finesse” We women say “lies and head-games”! Besides for you to declare women to have a monopoly, by definition you are saying that NO MAN has EVER, played head games with anyone… EVER in the history of the world! That is an absurd claim!
Maybe it's absurd but It's your claim not mine. I say women have the monopoly because guys wouldn't finesse if they didn't have to but women dont have to yet they choose to do it anyway.
@Vegasrunner Guys wouldn’t “finesse” (i. e. Lie their asses off) if they didn’t have to”. Again, utterly ridiculous! The two guys who did not lie, exaggerate, of flat out bullshit me about who or what they were, their dreams, or their future goals, I was romantically involved with for at exactly one year, and just under two years respectively. But now I’m in college, suddenly instead of just admitting “what me? Oh I’m a completely broke college student” they almost ALL have something that is about to make them a millionaire, or according to them, they already are, but they are living in the dorms, and on a meal plan… you know, as all millionaires do? It’s pathetic!
When my girl says "nothing" if it seems most likely minor i just ignore her since she said nothing and enjoy my day. Or if it seems very important ill compel her to answer by holding her down and spanking her until she talks.
@CrazyGirl2 Again this is your claim so not sure why you feel the need to share it w/ me. You took the original statement changed the language and are now claiming it's ridiculous, however it's your own claim. And I'm not sure what your dorm room stories have to do w/ this conversation. Please elaborate.
@Vegasrunner Yo, I think crazygirl2 is trying to shit test you bro. lolz
@D_Bone_Steak Na she's just saying what she feels. A lot of woman struggle w/ relationships because they are unable to understand opposing POV's this is just another example of that.
@Vegasrunner I actually do understand mens point of view. Clearly if you feel the need to use “misdirection” & “finesse” rather than just being open and honest with women, it’s YOU who are unable to understand women’s point of view. If you did, you wouldn’t need to be dishonest, or at a very minimum obfuscate the truth! I know that men want to fuck every woman they date at the end of the first date, but regardless of the sexuality, I know that men want a woman who thinks more like men do. A woman who just says what she feels rather than make you guess what’s wrong with her, w/o BS like “if you loved me you’d know!” (I’m looking for a partner, not a mind reader). But more than that, depending on how you were raised, men either want a woman who will be completely subservient, or a woman who will be an equal partner, not someone who is only in it for what you can offer financially! It’s one of the reasons that I insist on paying for my own food and drinks on any first date… after that, if it is getting serious, we can talk about how to share the costs of dating, and I don’t expect anyone to pay my way. Once my trust fund is released to me, it it safe to say that I will have more money than every guy I have ever dated combined! I don’t need someone to take care of me, I’m 19 and I already own my own house. And NO “daddy” did not buy it for me, my parents had no idea I was buying a house until I invited them to the closing. While I couldn’t have done it without my trust fund being required to pay for college AND my housing, I just managed to show how buying a house living there w/ 2 paying roommates, then selling it after graduation would be considerably less than paying rent for 6 to 8 years! So I definitely don’t NEED a man to take care of me, I’m looking for what most men are looking for… a true life partner, someone to share the ups and downs of life together, and most importantly share the expenses of living, and not just leach off me! Am I close?
@bamesjond0069 Domestic violence is NEVER the answer! And don’t say she’s into that, first if she was, you wouldn’t need to “hold her down”, second when we are upset at you, we want to know that we are understood. The last thing we want in that moment is sex.
@CrazyGirl2 I'm going to ask you what you think about this because I hear it a lot, and it's about women in general, but not saying it's you. Here it is; women tend to have major cases of solipsism. I've even heard women talk about women like that (in a mad way)... like only able to view things from their own perspective.
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@D_Bone_Steak Are you sure you meant solipsism, not selfishness? Solipsism is the philosophical idea that only one’s mind is sure to exist. Solipsism holds that knowledge of anything outside of one’s own mind is not certain to exist. The external word and other minds cannot be known and therefore may not exist outside of the mind of the one thinking about it. I ask, because solipsism often appears as a synonym for selfish in many thesauruses. If you are asking me the former, I’d have to decline to answer at this point, as I have yet to take a philosophy class. If you are asking the latter, then I’d have to say I’m sure there are a great many selfish women, just as there are a great many selfish men, selfishness is a human failing, not a masculine failing or a feminine failing. I would say on the whole, most women I know, or know of are actually the opposite of selfish. We tend to want to take lower paying jobs in fields that are nurturing like psychology, teacher, or nurse etc… also, I’ve seen that when couples get together in college and both want to be lawyers, it is usually the woman who supports her husband as HE goes through law school, with the hope that when he graduates, then she can go. She sacrifices her life’s dream for the happiness of her husband. Again there will always be exceptions, mental illness does not discriminate between women and men. But in mature healthy adults, it is my experience that women tend to sacrifice their hopes, their dreams, and their aspirations so that their husband can follow his dreams first. Also, when children are involved, who has to leave work and take care of the sick child… dad? No, it’s usually the mother, who again sacrifices her future career goals by constantly missing work to take care of the children. And I’m not saying that is a negative thing per se, just that in my experience, it’s is simply how it is.
@D_Bone_Steak
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Judging by your question, I assume that you disagree with my thesis, and I’m so sorry that you were involved with a selfish woman (or more than one) but it is a personality disorder, it’s not a normal state of being for either men or women. Just as men gladly sacrifice their own lives to save their friends on the battlefield of war, women sacrifice in our own ways. I for one consider myself a very selfless person, I am constantly thinking of others before I tend to my own needs. Often to my own detriment, but it would not exactly be selfless if I was wondering what was in it for me, now would it? Good luck, seriously! I genuinely hope you someday meet the right woman for you. Someone who gives of herself more than she asks in return, and I truly believe that most of us are like that. Sadly when we are young whether male or female, most younger people are just looking out for themselves. I was raised by parents who both believe in helping others before you help yourself. But if you are having trouble finding a woman who shares your giving personality, perhaps look to women over the age of 25, as the pre-frontal lobe of the brain is not fully developed until the age of 25. After that I believe even the most poorly raised women will see life more like yourself. Again, good luck! You’ll definitely find the right woman for you, as they say to girls… “you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince” which is an allegory that simply states, it Thames time and experience to find the right person for you, and never rush into anything. Make sure you truly know the person you are with before you commit to a lifetime relationship.
CORRECTION *It TAKES time and experience to find the person who is right for you*
Not sex. Just spanking.
@CrazyGirl2 You say you understand a mans POV however you haven't been able to articulate it accurately. What you are presenting is your POV based on a set of beliefs you've been taught. Women receive attention so they dont need to understand the other gender Men pursue women so to be successful they need to understand what works. Most men that are successful w/ women understand honesty does not work. It's just something women say to help them quickly disqualify men. This is a huge advantage for women, Guys really should be keeping as much back as possible from women because that's what drives them crazy. I can understand why u as a women wouldn't want yo hear that because it goes against your feelings. Also as a man that has been w/ hundreds of women some of your beliefs are false. 1) Men dont want a women that thinks like a man. 2) Men dont want an equal partner 3) Your inheritance and finances are irrelevant men value women for the beauty women value men for their status. 4) You are at about 50% you're still stuck in the Disney fairytale phase were you believe in "the one" and life partner and other b. s like that. Random question if a regular guy asked you out but said I just want to have sex w/ you would you go out w/ them?
@Vegasrunner mostly true but dont hate on Disney. If the girl is a virgin and raised right it definitely can work out that way.
@bamesjond0069 I dont agree w/ that either. A woman dosent have to be a virgin to find love. A lot of guys push the virgin narrative because they just can't handle the thought of having to compete against another man. I'm not naive in thinking a womens not going to have a past. The Disney part is the belief that there is this one special person out there and if you wait long enough they will come. Women may be able to get away w/ that b. s but a man needs to be proactive. You receive what you earn and a man needs to constantly earn value so he can attract more women.
@Vegasrunner no. Virgins have the most emotional connection. Has nothing to do with anything else. Maybe you haven't been with many virgins but they become extremely attached and emotionally invested. Exactly what you want from a wife.
@bamesjond0069 Lol, no I have never been w/ a virgin. I have a simple rule never be anyone's first or last. I want none of those problems.
@Vegasrunner *facepalm*
@bamesjond0069 Trust me you're better off leaving the Virgins alone
@Vegasrunner “you’re better off leaving the virgins alone“ Jesus, I TRULY wish my uncle had that attitude on my 13th birthday!
Hell I would have been happy with just “leave the children alone” or “just leave your family alone”, but definitely “Leave your TWIN brother’s daughter alone!”
@Vegasrunner why is that? I've only had great experiences with virgins
@Vegasrunner You are a REAL piece of shit! This ENTIRE sit has been taken over by Trolls! First you insult a rape survivor, THEN you accuse her entire family of being pedophiles! Screw you! My very first words on this ENTIRE post were “I don’t THINK women have a monopoly”… “Think”, as in it was my opinion, and you use my rape as a hate-speech weapon against me? Go to hell!
To the Mods @PrettyPriya @Still-alive @Brainsbeforebeauty @chrismaster69 Is THIS what this site has become? A site of grown men, trolls who gang-up on, and who use the rape of a still teenage girl when she was only 13 as a weapon, and then accuse her entire family of being pedophiles? No matter how many times I report this guy, Nothing ever happens! Well is THIS over the line yet, because I am really sick of being a punching bag for trolls like this!
You're not alone in this @CrazyGirl2
This site has become an absolute cesspool. Hopefully with some good and active mods we can help clean this shit up like with @PrettyPriya or @JimRSmith or @OlderAndWiser for example. If you ever need to talk, I'm here. No judgements and I'm discreet.
If someone ever fucks with you on here, @ me and I'll be there to back you.
@Agape93 @CrazyGirl2
Agreed there are some very nasty trolls running accounts on here lately.
Accounts that need frozen.
I have seen these users trolling multiple accounts on multiple questions. If it continues, I will ask GaG admin what action they’d like me to take.
@Vegasrunner Stop trolling her. You will have a problem with me then.
@bamesjond0069 To clingy. If you're a guy looking for 1 chick and 1 chick only then I get it but when you have options Virgins are the worse because the think that sex=marriage. I've passed on having sex w/ Virgins twice and I would do it again. I never want to be anyone's first or last.
@PrettyPriya Grow up. This woman engaged in a conversation and was questioned on her POV if you can't articulate them w/ getting emotional, namecalling and lying then that is on her. You coming to someone's defense based w/o understanding the entire context only highlights your own flaws.
@Vegasrunner name calling is two words. English isn’t my first language and I know that. Second. What name did I call anyone? Just curious.
@PrettyPriya The woman you are defending did. Or it okay for her to engage in that behavior?
@Vegasrunner I'm not defending anyone. Where did I defend someone? I simply stated that I saw you trolling a user on multiple questions.
@PrettyPriya So now you're just going to be dishonest? Are you saying you didn't tell me to "stop trolling her"? If you're not defending anyone why tag me?
@Vegasrunner that is simply stating the rules of the site. Perhaps you need to review the FAQs. Have a nice day.
@PrettyPriya The rules of a social media site is not to start a conversation w/ other users? Show me where it says that.
@Vegasrunner read the rules on trolling. That is exactly what you and others are doing by chasing a user around the site and harassing. There is an option on your profile and everyone else's to report for harassment.
I would consider this harassing a user. What I will do is send admin a link of this. I will let them decide how they want to handle it.
@Agape93
@Vegasrunner
@PrettyPriya
Right. Sorry for stepping in here, it's just to let you know that I've frozen certain members accounts.
This nonsense has gone on long enough with simply batting the ball backwards and forwards, and getting absolutely nowhere.
That's it... Take It or Leave It.
@PrettyPriya
Sadly I feel the pathetic "Gold Cap Brigade" won't agree with me, and will shortly be sending me their usual generically produced message informing me that they have reversed my actions.
@PrettyPriya
I regret to say that like the rest of us "Mods" you're unfortunately learning the "hard way".
@EmmaMary @PrettyPriya I honestly believed that this site was not just “better” than the likes of Quora, but was MUCH safer! Believe it if not, this site was recommended to my parents by my private-school guidance counselor! Instead, it’s not only NOT safer, content wise, but at least there at Quora, if someone trolls even ONCE, they are GONE! Unlike here, where is seems that unlimited chances are given, and unless someone comes right out and says “Hey I’m a Troll, they get to stay! It’s a real pity, this site, truly used to be an amazing site, but now it’s so much worse than sites like Quora! Hey they may be covered in nude pictures but at LEAST they cancel troll accounts immediately!
@CrazyGirl2
Just as I thought, sadly and regrettably the "powers that be" have seen fit to reinstate the accounts.
I can only say how very, very sorry I am for all the disappointment this forum is to you, and to countless others as well.
I alone, really need to come to my senses and simply "throw the towel in".
@GirlsAskGuys
There is a lot of trolling going on with this question.
I believe MoDs have tried to sort out.
Can this question be removed and ideally the person trolling as well.
The user is effectively thumbing their nose at any form of Moderation on the site.
@ChrisMaster69 @PrettyPriya I seriously want to thank you BOTH for the outstanding work you have done here. And for the attempted help! Whether or not anything worked, that’s not the point! Thank you both for trying. Also anyone else who helped along the way!
@CrazyGirl2 You are always welcome. Perhaps admin will look at this again and take action. You always can count on my support.
@EmmaMary @CrazyGirl2 They probably actually read the correspondence and realized you were being dishonest. It's one thing to be in your feelings because someone disagrees w/ you but to believe that that warrants limiting free speech is horrible. I applaud the moderators but they probably should enforce a penalty on people who make false allegations.
@Vegasrunner LEAVE ME ALONE! I won’t ask again! I wasn’t speaking to you, you are Harassing me AGAIN! My correspondence was to Priya and others, NOT you! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! DON’T REPLY TO THIS! JUST STOP THIS HARASSMENT!
@Vegasrunner I’m going to be polite about it, but I want to make a point. It has been 9 days of back and forth. 9!!!
Don’t you think after say…. day 2 or 3 everyone has said their piece and entrenched in their view?
I don’t think after 9 days much is going to change. That is why a mod took action.
Now, I’m not just referring to you. Please don’t misunderstand me. I’m referring to ALL involved.
I think it has come time to end this conversation. Please. No more last jabs from anyone.
What I do not want to see is admin step in and start suspending accounts. Fair enough? Thanks in advance.
@CrazyGirl2
If I were you I would simply Block him, thereby not receiving any further comments/opinions etc. as well as putting a stop to this pathetic harrassment that he seems hell bent on creating.
You could also send a direct message yourself to the Admins. in the hope that they will view this persistent harrassment more favourable... Although sadly, given their pathetic appalling attitude and response so far, I seriously don't hold out much hope for a satisfaction result.
@PrettyPriya Thank you for sharing however not sure of the relevance. I was under the impression this was a conversation and I'm merely responding to the dialogue. If you're not interested in engaging in one then you can simply stop tagging me. Unfortunately it seems you and I dont share the same objective as u seem to be looking to argue, while I am seeking answers to what should be very basic questions. It is difficult to respond because the majority of your issue is fabricated and really does not need to be validated w/ acknowledgement.
i think it’s just women’s nature to shit test men to see what they’ll tolerate til u put ur foot down. Women don’t want a guy that’s a pushover or pussy whipped so even if she’s mad at u in the short term she’ll respect u for not giving her an inch cuz if u do that she’ll take a mile. Both of those scenarios sounds like she’s testing u to see if u’ll supplicate to her behavior. If she’s mad cuz u couldn’t tell she was in a bad mood then tell her to go be in a bad mood by herself it’s not your problem and if she is mad you didn’t get her food after she clearly said she didn’t want any than tell her she’s just being a fussy bitch and she can get her own food from now on.
That's formally called a "shit test." Seriously look up "shit test" and will describe exactly what you're talking about. Women do it to see how much shit you'll put up with. Between dudes it's called ballbusting and it's more of a joke and it's only to see whos the whiner and complainers in a sort of pecking order sort of thing. It can get annoying with females though because you might pass a shit test and then there is another one, and another one... it doesn't end. Some do it more than others, but you're going to run into it with any female... eventually.
amen preach it
That is SUCH a load of “shit test”! The fact that you think “ALL 3.9 BILLION WOMEN” on Earth act like that, speaks way more to your choice of women than it does to womankind!
@CrazyGirl2 Maybe you're right. (insert the "not all women" phrase into what I said, and because many do hold a NAWALT viewpoint) From my anecdotal experiences though... I have yet to see any examples, especially in long-term dealings. Not from any of my relationships, any of my friends, or any of the relationships I got to closely observe around me. And out there in the manosphere it sure does get talked about a lot in discussions... due to the prevalence of how much that happens, I would argue it's definitely 'most women' that behave like that.
Your anecdotal evidence aside, I clearly informed you that I was not like that. I know I’m nothing special, my friends DID think “mind games were part of the deal of relationships, but I showed them a different way. I’m not saying that They’re are perfect, & lord knows I’m not, but the point is to constantly try!
Opinion
30Opinion
Keep in mind you are only talking about one half of the problem.
It’s button pressing. We all do it on a certain level in relationships. Even if we don’t mean it and the other person knows. We as humans all have off days, even if rarely. We all have days we need space and don’t have it, and other things that can trigger too.
They do it because they can. Everything is a designed test that you'll fail miserably. Welcome to having relationships with women. If you can figure out why they do what they do, for anything, you'll win the grand prize. What that is, I don't know, cause no man has ever seen it, or won it. Good luck.
If i got mad, i man up and put him in to his place. I have never ever understood these mind games. I can understand too an extent when he seriously hurts her and acts like nothing happens and therefore she does not talk to him and he thinks she is playing mind games-i personally would no do that and so i would hurt him the same way he hurt me
The food rage is real XD
But in all seriousness, I have had a few arguments with my boyfriend as he has done stuff differently that I would like, but it is rare if I'm angry about something that I'm directly angry at him
It's poor communication on someone's part. Some people do that as their own way of signaling to their partner something is wrong or they want you to do something. Yes women have done this to me but I've been told some guys do it too. If you want a successful relationship, then talking to each other about everything is super important. Non verbal "body language" isn't an effective way to tell your partner something. You have to be a bigger person and speak up!
I have no idea the REAL reason/issue behind it, but I will say I paid enough attention to my ex girlfriend that I learned her cues.. So it was a breeze after I learned everything.. I’m also really good at paying attention to nonverbal body language.
Because she wants to FEEL he's paying attention. Not all women do this, but women want to FEEL connected. And feeling connected goes beyond exchanging words back and forth.
Cuz a lot of women can’t fathom wing supportive and encouraging men only complaining and expectations that don’t go both ways.
Mind games are a form of indirect, nonverbal communication which women are naturally good at as it gives plausible deniability and non confrontationally in case of things going badly for the woman.
You don't know a lot of women. So stop with the generalizations. Your mindset is the reason why your relationship is screwed up. She plays games with u bc u allow it
How not to allow it
@he-takes-a-part Stop taking her shit! If she keeps it up, cut her ass off! Young children play games too, but it takes a real adult to ignore them and put their foot down!
Moral of the story: whenever you see your girl sitting on the couch, bring her tea and pastry. Full stomach happy stomach
My parents have been married for 21 years and they still do this. You would think that they've learned to communicate but no. It's so annoying. Like mom if you're hungry just say it. and dad just assume she is. I don't know
Please read my answer about shit testing. I agree with you that it is annoying. Seemingly it is done for not much more than attention (negative or positive) and to constantly 'test' the male side on dedication.
@D_Bone_Steak My parents are sooo annoying like literally as we type she's currently not talking to him because she's mad at him for being on his phone instead of paying attention to her. I'm like seriously? and to make matters worse she's having me talk to him for her, but she still makes him breakfast and packs him a lunch.
Yeah that sounds annoying... sorry you're dealing with that BS. Brings me back to my idea that it's usually done for attention. I think the majority of those situations are literally just for attention and attention alone.
@D_Bone_Steak yeah you’re right now that I think about it she’s super dramatic and tries to scare him into thinking she’s dying whenever she gets mad at him. Like suddenly she complains of chest pains 🙄 you’re 100% correct
It's shitty... Imagine him having to deal with that shit, and I really don't approve of her making you her messenger in that mess. I'm still trying to crack the case on why so many females feel so attention deprived... and I'm not trying to be sexist by saying that because when a dude starts doing it I think it's even worse and more abusive. Like I've said in my main answer dudes do it too but it's more of a joke and just to point out who's a wimp mentally... it's actually funny and just a joke. Females (most often females) can make it seem so serious though and actually turn it into a fight. Not sure how I would describe the difference... dramatic... over the top... all I would suggest is to take notes on what she's doing and stop yourself if you ever find yourself following those same patterns. We can't teach the old dogs new tricks, but we can keep ourselves in line.
@D_Bone_Steak for sure
I can't stand when you ask a woman a question and they don't answer and just automatically expect you to know the answer.
Get used to it. It doesn't magically go away unfortunately.
Woman actually react better to romantic cues when they are on a full stomach, it's new studies, search it up, I found out about this a few days ago
Because many women believe this is normal interaction
Lots of reasons. Listen reinforce you love and the words ‘yes dear’ work wonders.
Because she hasn't had enough men hold her accountable for bullshit behavior
That’s exactly what I am , Lmaooo 😂. I just feel like if I get mad why can’t you tryna talk to me or try to make me not mad at you!!
I read this with a mexican accent.
@Billiumboomerboi well, I’m from Thailand
@Billiumboomerboi LOL 😆
@Billiumboomerboi Lolz... Mexican accent totally applies.
Why are a lot of men so bad with nonverbal communication?
Nonverbal communication? I say that's bullshit and not fair to anyone trying to communicate in a normal way.
Share some of those you did and man was dumb founded
It was after when we get what we want from you you are optional.
It's like women expecting guys to pursue them. You just have to accept women are just overgrown kids. They always want attention. And like a kid when they don't get it they act out.
Because you're dumb enough to fall for it. Thats why. When you stop falling for their nonsense they stop doing it.
Mental degradation happens to people without experience in social skills. A women expecting you to read her mind is a red flag and should be dumped or rejected immediately or else they will think being psycho and rude is the way to get men
I agree, but to be real... there are tons of simps that will put up with it and chances are she'll never learn a damn thing... and only think she's right 100% of the time.
They want power so they can control the relationship and get what they want
Got nothing to do with women, men do the same. Some people just are like that.
it's just what women do. get over it. just nod your head and agree.
The same reason why men like to play mind games with women.
There's a little girl somewhere inside of every woman.
Because she’s a devil inside a women’s body
We are wired that way
For the same reason men do it to their girlfriends
Because they are 2 yr olds trapped in big bodies
Women like drama. They will even create it.
Because they can
cuz women yk
They are immature
Women are a mystery.
I have no idea
I have a theory
İ really don't know
Women are children.
You can also add your opinion below!
