Why does he want to know if I’m sleeping with other people or getting any sexual opportunities?

[Anonymous]

This guy I’ve been talking to everyday and see every so often wants to know if I’m sleeping with other people or have been able to pursue other opportunities even though we’re not exclusive and he didn’t want a relationship at the moment. Why does it matter to him if I was or not? I know we have feelings for each other but having a relationship at the moment would not work out in either of our favours. We’re not exclusive and we’re “just friends”.

[Guy13]

Why can’t you be forthcoming? What are you hiding? Obviously 🙄, you are embarrassed or don’t want to lie about something or don’t want secrets discussed. This is not difficult and is adult conversation.
I would be out having demonstrated your unwillingness to be honest when it is uncomfortable.

[Asker]

We always bring up the hard topics and communicate about said topic. this is just one he’s brought up recently. Neither of us has slept with each other yet, and I have been completely honest about everything I’ve ever said

[Guy13]

He has trust issues so perhaps you should investigate GENTLY his past relationships. If there is no history then he is a controlling man trying to get inside your head and reduce your identity into object rather than person. Investigate his past.

[PrettyPriya]

Well, if you are just friends, it should not matter. Are you sleeping with him as well though? That would be a good reason to know. I would want to know for the simple reason that I don't want to get any diseases. I am not saying you have any but the odds increase if you are sleeping with multiple partners.

If that is the case and you are sleeping with him, he has a right to know so that he can get sexual health checkups. If you are not sleeping with him, then it is none of his business.

That is my only guess as to why he would want to know other than from jealousy. That could be another reason but a stupid one. If you have made it clear that you are not exclusive, then it isn't his concern. Best idea is to talk to him. All we can do is throw guesses at what he is thinking.

[HelpMe06]

I agree 100% with the above. Literally couldn’t of responded to this question any better

[PrettyPriya]

@HelpMe06 Thank you! 🙂

[Asker]

Yea I for sure agree along the lines of getting health checkups, but we haven’t slept with each other

[Asker]

He used to remind me that we’re just friends and I felt like it was his way of suppressing what he feels

[MzAsh]

If you’re sleeping him, his ego is involved. He wants to know where he falls within your pool of options.

[Asker]

We haven’t slept with each other

[LazerBean]

Because he's trying to figure out if he wants to pursue you or not.

[Asker]

yea I can’t tell if he finally is ready to pursue me. My intuition tells me yes, because I don’t see the point in asking the other person if they’ve had opportunities when we’re not exclusive, just friends, and have not slept with any one else

[LazerBean]

Because he doesn't want someone who has recently been sleeping around.

[Asker]

Neither of us has slept around

[LazerBean]

And he can't know that unless you tell him so.

[Zandoval]

Well are you?

[Asker]

Are we just friends? Nah, It’s definitely more but I think he’s denial

[Zandoval]

Nah like are you smashing others?

[Asker]

Nope, neither of us

[Zandoval]

Cool. If you're not, then just say it. If you like him, ask him out. If not, tell him you're not into him like that. Simple.

[Asker]

Yea we spoke about having not done it with other people. And I for sure like him, it’s just complicated

[Zandoval]

Communication always helps