Is it wrong for a girl to wait for a guy to mature of he wants to mature?

[Anonymous]

I'm 16 and my boyfriend is 17 almost 18. I love being with him it's just that he's not everything I want in my future husband and I was always taught to stay with a guy who's values align with mine.

For example:

1. He's not a Godly man yet but he wants to be. I value my purity a lot and he doesn't so much.

2. He doesn't exactly have the big dreamer mindset like me but when i tell him about it he shut me down at first like that's not gonna happen but after he tries to imagine it and then he says he'd love that for himself too

3. He isn't as romantic as me, I want a guy who's more romantic than I am, he said he's going to try but I just have to teach him because he doesn't know what to do exactly.

The thing is he wants to try and I know he's only 17 so how much can i expect from a him you know. Everything else he's perfect in.

• He's very supportive but I told him I don't just want support, I also want a partner.
• He listens to me without judgment. He never invalidates my feelings
  He tries a lot. Whenever i tell you something bothers me you try to fix it. He apologizes even when he's not wrong but what he said hurt my feelings. He's a great listener
• He's mostly respectful and kind
• He's patient and caring
• He tries to make me feel comfortable enough to express my feelings
• He understands and empathizes with me
• He's funny, nerdy, knowledgeable, cool, humble
• He's interested in everything I do (except watching barbie movies😭 but it's okay) and interesting
• He's willing to compromise

So is it okay if i wait for him to make progress in the other areas even if it can take a while? Even if they're my non-negotiable values?

[Anonymous]

Stay with himI wish you were older and knew me. But look when I was 17 I was very different. I was romantic, dreamed big, and courteous and I still am all those things but I very different. My awareness is much much higher.

Keep reading. He is going to change but I'm going to give you the secret.
Everyone changes but you can control what you change into. If you two are serious about each other you need to start molding yourselves into a harmonic fit now.
You can go look for some other guy but I think the most important thing is desire and open mindedness. You both can change. I'll explain how.

I have a philosophy of long term relationships and even though I can't explain it all right now nor would I want to type it all right now; I can give you enough.

Everything that he is or isn't is because of his subconscious mind; specifically the paradigm. If you want him to change or you to change, you have to alter the paradigm. If you don't to do that, consciously or unconsciously, you will never change. The younger you are the easier it is to alter your conditioning. Once you get to like 35+ I hear it is tougher.

First you have to understand the paradigm or subconscious. Some people have a sense of fashion while others dress so mundane. That is because their paradigm is in harmony with dressing mundane and if you make them dress more flashy they will probably feel uncomfortable. Or take a shy person to a club or social event or to give a speech. Mind is activity, movement. There is activity inside happening that directs your decisions and actions and attitudes. They activity is what you must alter if you are to live the life you want as a duo.

My philosophy is based on two things. Having a definite joint vision and staying in harmony at all cost. To create a vision like such you'd have to know what your want in life and you both would have to agree on it. If you want to live in USA and he wants to live in China... Not gonna work. If you don't have a vision you won't know who you need to BEcome... That is what goal achieving is. Goal setting is all logic and intellect but goal achieving (big goals) is about altering the inside and changing who you are as a person.

To stay in harmony with one another you both need to make a habit out of certain traits. Courtesy, open mindedness, positive mental attitude are some of those traits. Even if you disagree you must remain aware you are a team and the goal is the vision. You must stay in harmony with the vision and the vision requires you two to stay in harmony. Harmony is not agreeing on everything. Harmony is influencing each others subconscious in such a way that it is felt you are both a team and not against one another.

I know this is a lot of information but screenshot it and keep rereading it. If it sounds like a good idea then use it. Okay so if your boyfriend is to change or grow he must alter or create new neural connections in is nervous system. That is all that is controlling us. Now you environment is controlling much of your programing. If your mom tells you everyday you are dumb and ugly... You will come to believe it because all belief is is neural connections that have been made habitual. And if you believe such negative things you will self-sabotage yourself certainly. The self sabotage begins as a emotion and that emotion controls your thoughts and actions. If you think about going to talk to a guy you like the emotions will creep up and stop you. All because your mom conditioned you to believe such negative things about yourself.

If you're going to alter the paradigm you must understand you higher mental faculties.
Perception, imagination, reason, memory, will, intuition. You have to live from the inside out. If you don't your environment will control you programming.

I have to go now but keep rereading this and if you are serious about your life and your boyfriend I'd recommend buying the books: How to raise your salary, change your paradigm change your life, innercise, and psycho cybernetics
Most people are conditioning by the masses and so that's why most people get about the same results. only like 3-6% of the population are winning and even most of them aren't happy because they don't understand what I just explained to you.

gl

[Asker]

😳😳wow! I love this, thank youuu😀

[Twalli]

Since he seems to want to be the type of man you want, I would stay with him. He loves you because he's trying to be what you want him to be. If he wasn't trying, it'd be a different story, but the fact is that he's trying to be the type of guy you want means you're the type of girl he wants. If you weren't he wouldn't be trying to be worthy to be your forever man.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't. There's a possibility he never does.