Why does my boyfriend call me all the time?

[la2039391]

It’s getting really excessive. We are in a long distance relationship so I get that we should probably speak more often, but he calls me five times a day after work and at random times, even when I’m trying to spend time with my family and my friends. The other evening he called me and then 20 minutes after we got off the phone he rang me again, and I told him I was busy and having a shower and he replied with this emoji: 😶😶😶

It just makes me feel like I’ve got to constantly speak to him on the phone and I can’t get on with my life. He does this especially if I go out on a night out with friends he tells me to call him as soon as I get home.

Why is he constantly calling me?

[Aysen]

I'm beginning to think it's because of one, if not both these reasons:

A) He believes that the more quality time you spend with someone, the more love and devotion is shown to them (which isn't true in every case).

B) He feels insecure because of the long distance, believing that if you hang around with other people for too long, that you'll lose interest in him since you can't physically bond or interact with him.

It's very important to set boundaries here and communicate what amount of time together is effective for you both. It sounds like he's either lovestruck and adores spending as much time with you as possible and/or he's really scared of losing you and keeps you as close as he can, even if long distance. It's suffocating when you want to enjoy your life, but are constantly pressured by your significant other to ensure they are happy, even at the expense of your own happiness! This shouldn't be happening at all...

Why not talk with him about this, express your honest feelings and find that middle ground together? If you need an idea, I did long distance temporarily with my fiance where we'd text in the morning, then follow up later in the afternoon with a single, nice, intimate phone call about how the day went, what's coming up and just bonding in general! There's only so much a person can talk about within a day and having too many phone calls in a short period of time like you and your boyfriend are doing right now isn't healthy. If he can't learn to tone down the calls, he's not respecting your boundaries. I'm sure you two can think of something!

Hope this helps with what you're looking for 😊

[Billlewis]

He's clearly obsessed with you, and that's a very nice attribute for your boyfriend to have, as long as it doesn't become a problem or nuisance for you. Maybe you can try to spice up your phone conversations with him. Tell him when you want him to call you, right to the exact minute, and give him instructions, assignments, etc.

[ansbebhenw]

Honestly, enjoy it while it last. at first, I was annoyed when the same thing was happening to me, but now I can’t even get one call a day.

[boggboss]

Have u not spoken to him about this and creating boundaries

[Emanon25]

He’s so much worried that you hang out with other guys, he has trust issues.

[Alex8736]

Insecure and controlling

[In_Trance]

you lost me at "long distance relationship"

[Anonymous]

I think I know why.