We've been friends for a couple years and only met once in person, but we talked all the time and called each other a lot. I knew he had a thing for me but I made sure never to give him and reason to think I did for him. Some time last year, he got super clingy and a little crazy about me so I pulled back, then I called him one day to catch up and he mentioned he got a girlfriend. After that, things were good again, he had a girlfriend so I wasn't worried about him getting clingy again and our friendship was great for about a year, until a month ago.
He messaged a mutual friend and confessed his feelings for me, said he was in love with me and being with his girlfriend didn't feel right because of me and asked our friend if she could set us up on a date. She showed me the messages and I just messaged him "what's up?" And he told me how he broke up with his girlfriend and was spiraling because of me. I knew he was going through it but I thought it was because of the break up. He asked me out then and I declined. I told him he misread the situation and that I'm dating somebody. He seemed totally fine by the rejection and I tried to not make it weird but now I'm questioning our friendship. Did he ever really want to be my friend or just get closer to me in a romantic way?
He messaged me a few days ago asking what was up with me because I haven't been talking to him. I told him why flat out, and he didn't try to clarify anything he just said it's okay and not a big deal. It is to me, if we were never really "friends". I feel betrayed and guilty that I never confronted him before and let him know I didn't feel anything for him, but I never made him think that anyway. I haven't been replying to him or even opening his messages because when I do, he just sees I read it and messages me again. I don't know what to do or if I'm overreacting. Everyone I talk to says I'm right and he's crazy. I feel lied to, like he was hiding this obsessive side of him to get me to like him.
He messaged a mutual friend and confessed his feelings for me, said he was in love with me and being with his girlfriend didn't feel right because of me and asked our friend if she could set us up on a date. She showed me the messages and I just messaged him "what's up?" And he told me how he broke up with his girlfriend and was spiraling because of me. I knew he was going through it but I thought it was because of the break up. He asked me out then and I declined. I told him he misread the situation and that I'm dating somebody. He seemed totally fine by the rejection and I tried to not make it weird but now I'm questioning our friendship. Did he ever really want to be my friend or just get closer to me in a romantic way?
He messaged me a few days ago asking what was up with me because I haven't been talking to him. I told him why flat out, and he didn't try to clarify anything he just said it's okay and not a big deal. It is to me, if we were never really "friends". I feel betrayed and guilty that I never confronted him before and let him know I didn't feel anything for him, but I never made him think that anyway. I haven't been replying to him or even opening his messages because when I do, he just sees I read it and messages me again. I don't know what to do or if I'm overreacting. Everyone I talk to says I'm right and he's crazy. I feel lied to, like he was hiding this obsessive side of him to get me to like him.
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1Opinion
Women need to understand this, the only time a man is okay with being 'just friends' is if he is gay or sees you as a guy. We need to stop friend zoning guys thinking its okay... Its not in their nature to want to be 'just friends' they are primal creatures, meant to produce so they are looking for what you have whether its sexual or commitment it all leads to one place and no its natural and they shouldn't be shunned for that, we just need to stop acting like idiots and stop friend zoning men.
What a complete shit show
They are right, he is crazy.