Hey I hope everyone is having a good week sorry i haven’t posted anything on here for a while but today I really need help and advice. I have known the guy I like since the age of 17/18 and I spent 11 years just wasting my life on him hoping things will get somewhere I fell for his words hook line and sinker anyways …
I just recently found out he met one of his exs at his best friends house cause his best friend and Ex are engaged except his ex lives in his house and not her fiancé house we got into a massive fight about this he thought it’s due to my insecurities but who wouldn’t be insecure about this it’s just weird anyways… no one knows how much this hurt because no one had to wait 11 years for someone hoping they will like them back and pushed away anyone else interested in them to stay loyal I could go as far as to say I fell in love in away.
We aren’t talking now but I’m starting to miss him to a point I want to die and I feel sick and mentally I’m going crazy just screaming and shouting because when me and him were talking it felt like peace to me now I don’t have that and got no one else to talk to I’m struggling as it is mentally we were there for one another but now I’m aching and just crying but I can’t stop I tried to move on.
i got no friends around me and I dunno what to do… please help me it took me 11 years to build this and it took an ex a week to collapse this he’s convincing me they are not doing it like sleeping with each other I don’t believe it. If they weren’t he wouldn’t need to be convincing me they are not doing it😭😭😭💔💔💔 I really do want to die
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Jesus sis, no wonder you're such a mess after pouring 11 years into this guy. That's an insane amount of time to invest just for him to pull some shady sh*t like that.
First things first - you need to get your health and safety in order. Are you at risk of self-harming? Do you have anyone you can call or stay with right now so you're not alone in this state? Please take care of yourself.
Second - this guy clearly doesn't value or respect you like you deserve. I know it's hard to see now through the pain, but 11 years is way too long to waste on someone still keeping you on the backburner while meeting up with exes. You'll end up old and bitter if you don't cut him loose.
Is there any hobbies or communities you can throw yourself into to start meeting new people? Friends and distractions will help heal your heart over time. Also don't be afraid to vent to us girls whenever you need - we've all been there sis.
You'll find your peace and worth again without this joker stringing you along. It's going to hurt like hell, but staying will only end up destroying you. You've got your whole life ahead - don't waste another second on someone who doesn't treat you like a queen. You deserve the world, girl!
I have self harmed I don’t see me without him I see my future with him my parents well my own mother wants me dead she told me herself she even said to my face why didn’t I get under a car that day… he meant the world to me I Have no one else… when I needed someone to vent to it was him I called and yeah I love gaming but even there slowly getting boring
Woah, I understand you're going through some really dark stuff right now but please don't harm yourself. I know it feels like the world is ending but you can and will get through this.
Your mom sounds like she sucks for saying those things to you, that's super messed up. Maybe try venting to a helpline instead of her if you need to talk? They're there to listen without judgement.
I know it's hard to picture life without this guy right now, but you've gotta start focusing on you. Do things just for yourself like your hobbies, go for walks, listen to music - anything to take your mind off him for a bit each day even if you don't feel like it.
And stop all contact with him completely, block him everywhere so you're not constantly reminded. Give your heart and mind space to start healing. It will hurt like hell for awhile but you'll get through it day by day.
I know life feels dark as fuck now but please promise me you'll hold on - there are always alternatives to self-harm no matter how miserable you might feel in the moment. And if urges get too intense, call a crisis line right away. We're all here for you whenever you need, you're not alone in this. Promise you'll keep fighting luv?
I think ma'am you have to move on from this guy , he didn't respect you i can even say that he never said that he respects you and your feelings. And if he said he never acted that he respects you.
He has said he’s respected my feelings he put my mental health before his when I needed someone to talk to all I did was message him and he’d call me he’s better than my friends are
Then why you are overthinking about it?
I’m not over thinking about it I have had feelings for him for 11 years
I'm confused. Are you saying this guy lives with his ex girlfriend or the ex girlfriend lives with his friend?
The ex girlfriend is engaged to his best friend but she lives with him and not her fiancé
How long ago was she his girlfriend?
That is a very strange situation
I don’t know they might have started dating in tween the time I liked him
What's so special about this guy? Why don't you just find another guy that's not going to keep you waiting around forever?
You don’t get it no one does
You've wasted a lot of time on this guy. If he's not planning to marry you by now, it's time for you to find another guy because he's obviously but the right one
None of my friends put me first I was always there for them but they aren’t there for me he on the other was a phone call away I could message him and say I’m feeling shit and he’s call me just hearing his voice talk to me was soothing and peaceful to me…
The fact that he said he puts my mental health before his was a sense of caring when my brother got into shit and I was worried i ran to him
That’s what I don’t know