Should I tell my partner I've been feeling insecure in the relationship?

[Anonymous]

First of all I'd like to say that I do not have the intention to break up and there's so much love between me and my partner. We've been living together for almost one year now and the experience has been great. We don't argue much but last month we had an argument and were upset with each other for a few days and since then I've been feeling insecure. I have this fear that my partner might leave me and that I'm not what my partner needs. He never said that he wanted to leave or break up though. I'm doing my best to be a good partner but I feel that he's going to leave me for someone better and these thoughts are killing me.

[Oliverlogan263]

Hey girl, that fight must have really rattled you if you're still feeling insecure weeks later. It's totally normal to have doubts, especially living together for the first time.

I think being open about your feelings is important in a relationship. Sit your man down when you're both calm and just let him know what's been on your mind since the argument. Let him reassure you about why he's with you.

Guys need that emotional connection too, so sharing your insecurity can actually bring you closer. He probably has no idea you're feeling this way! Once it's out, listen when he tells you why you've got nothing to worry about.

Just come at it from an "I care about us" place, not an accusatory one. And accept the comfort he gives - don't argue against it just cause your anxiety is loud right now. Trust that he means what he says.

This is just a tiny bump! Talking it out will clear the air so you can move on from the fight stronger than ever. You got this sis - now go get yourself a good cuddle and all will be well!

[Asker]

thank you so much for your kind words. reading your comment made me feel better.

[handsomelad70]

Yes, but be discreet and sensitive to their feelings.

[Asker]

@handsomelad70 absolutely!

[Oliverlogan263]

My pleasure madamé 🌹🌹🌹

[rosemilk]

once you move in together, it's harder to get back on your feet and live alone (actually almost impossible depending on your cost of living), so that would probably be his last resort. as for the argument, that's normal in relationships. and everyone has a fear that their partner will leave them. those are just human feelings. just because you have an argument, doesn't mean it's automatically over (depending on the topic, i have no idea what you two argued about).

i bet you'd feel a lot better if you talk to him about it. i know when something is bothering me, it feels so much better to talk to my partner about it and get some reassurance. that's why communication is so important in relationships.

[SecretsofKB]

Arguments are natural in any relationship, and they can honestly be healthy at times if done correctly.

You do need to communicate this feeling to your partner. There are things that the both of you should be doing to avoid you feeling insecure after your arguments. And you keeping this to yourself will not help you two to find what those solutions are.

Talk to him.

[jahaims]

You are just insecure

[Asker]

So I shouldn't tell him?

[jahaims]

It's always good to communicate, but it isn't his job to fix your insecurities.

[Asker]

I'm aware is not his job.