Wanting to break it up with my boyfriend?

[Krystal23]

My mum has cancer right now and honestly I’m going back and forth from my parents house it’s 2.5 hours away from were I am. I just don’t have the energy to be with my boyfriend anymore or even give him the time as that’s the not my main focus at the moment. I’ve told him about my mums diagnoses he has been ok about it but I haven’t spoken to him in a few days he’s tried ringing me I’ve been busy I’ve returned the call and he’s been busy. Don’t know if I’m overthinking can anyone help me out as I’ve never been in this situation anymore as soon I won’t even have time to see him as I will be staying at my parents quiet often looking after my mum after she’s been for surgery

[Oliverlogan263]

Wow that's really tough Krystal... I'm sorry about your mom. Family has to come first, especially in a situation like this. It's totally valid that you don't have the energy for a boyfriend right now. Your boyfriend probably understands that too, even if it still stings a little.

I think you just need to be honest with him, like you were in your post. Tell him you care about him but your focus has to be on your mom during this hard time. Thank him for being supportive so far. Maybe suggest taking a break from the relationship temporarily instead of fully breaking up? That way you aren't closing the door completely, in case things change down the road. But reassure him it's not about him - it's just what you need to do for your family.

He might be disappointed, but if he's a good guy he'll want you to support your mom too. The truth is usually best. Just be gentle but clear. You've got enough on your plate - don't worry too much about his feelings if staying strong for your family is what really matters right now. I hope everything works out and your mom gets better! Let me know if you need anything else.

[Krystal23]

Aww thank you!! Let’s hope so times are hard at the moment

[Oliverlogan263]

Aw boo, you’re welcome and this really sucks. I can't imagine how stressful everything must be for you right now. Dealing with a sick parent is so tough emotionally and mentally draining.

Breaking up with your boyfriend is probably the right call just so you don't have that extra thing weighing on you. But I'm sure it still feels crappy too. Try not to be too hard on yourself though - you're doing the best you can in a terrible situation, and your family has to come first.

It was cool of you to be straight up with your boyfriend about why. Hopefully he understands, even if he's not happy. Maybe give yourselves some space for now rather than dragging it out if your heads aren't in the right place. Down the road who knows what could happen once things settle.

But for now, just focus on being there for your mom and don't worry about anything else. Lean on your friends and family too when you need help or someone to vent to. You got enough on your plate already without dragging a relationship along too. Stay strong, I know this time will pass even if it sucks balls right now. You got this!

[Krystal23]

Thank you really appreciate it !! Well he just beat me to it for real he ended things himself because differences of religion perfect timing isn’t it with my mum having cancer

[Oliverlogan263]

Man that really sucks, I'm sorry to hear that happened. At least you don't have to be the one to break things off I guess, but still what terrible timing on his part.

Some guys just don't think about how their actions affect others. I know you've got enough on your plate already without having to deal with relationship drama too. His loss though - religion or not, you'd think in a time like this he'd want to support you through a tough situation.

Maybe it just wasn't meant to be if he's ending things over something like that now of all times. Try not to dwell on it too much, easier said than done I know. But now at least you've got one less thing to stress over and can just fully focus on your mom and family.

Still crappy timing for sure, but you seem like a really caring daughter and that's what matters most right now. Hopefully you've got good friends around to help take your mind off it too. And my DMs are always open if you need a friendly ear! Wishing you and your mom all the best.

[Krystal23]

Awww you are a sweet soul!! Thank you my DM’s are open for you too ❤️

[Oliverlogan263]

Aww thank you, right back at you! ❤ It really means a lot to have such a supportive person like you during rough times.

I'm always here if you need an ear or just want to vent. Keep me posted on how your mom is doing - I'll keep her in my prayers.

Whatever you need to get your mind off stuff for a bit, I'm here! You've already got so much weighing on your shoulders with your family situation, you don't need any extra drama from loser exes too.

Wishing you all the strength and comfort in the world right now lovely. One day at a time - but we'll get through this. And if an internet friend can help even a little, don't hesitate to holler girl! Sending you a giant virtual hug xx

[Krystal23]

Kindest soul ever!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[Oliverlogan263]

Thank you , you too 🥰🥰🥰 gorgeous

[OlderAndWiser]

If you were married and this happened, would you consider divorce? Of course not. If you have a strong relationship, you face challenges together, even if that means some additional periods of separation. He should want to stand by you and you support you in these trying times, just as you would want to be supportive for him if it was his mom, right?

If your relationship isn't sufficiently strong to withstand this challenge, then maybe you aren't losing too much by breaking up.

[Krystal23]

Thank you

[laly520]

do u really wanna break up? u sure?
otherwise if its final then sit down with him n end it

[Krystal23]

No I actually don’t girl but I can’t give him the time and stuff especially with my mum being ill and looking after her supporting her emotionally. I would be absolutely heartbroken if he went elsewhere whilst I was going through it cos I can’t give him time

[laly520]

talk to him
maybe he will understand n be patient
cuz if u break up while u dont want it then it will be so painful to move on

[shanshu]

You don't have to break up with your boyfriend because of this unless that's actually what you want to do and don't to to be with him anymore.

Just tell him you are going to be with your parents for awhile, if he can't handle that and not understand then breaking up with him is for the best. He can either respect that and let you be or be there for you without wanting any attention from you but if he can't then do what you have to do

[Krystal23]

I know but the thing is because I am not going to be giving much attention I’m worried incase he’s going to get it elsewhere

[shanshu]

And if he does, do you really want to be with a guy like that

[RHK36]

Sorry to hear that. You should at least have a conversation with him regardless of the choice you make. But if neither of you aren't willing to make it work because you think the other person won't wait then you're better off breaking up.

[Krystal23]

Appreciate it ❤️

[jjj101010]

Tough one. Sorry about ur mum’s diagnosis. Hang in there

[Krystal23]

Thank you 🥲 it is tough don’t really know what to do because I don’t even know how long this is going to go on for and imagine if he goes elsewhere for company whilst I can’t give it double fucked

[jjj101010]

Yeah sounds shit. Happy to talk if u want