My girlfriend hit me in the face. Should I make it into a big deal or should I just let it go?

[Anonymous]

Ok so my girlfriend was having a really really bad day. The electric company threatened to shut off the electricity because they said her check didn't go through. Then she had a really bad day at work and when she go off she received an email from her teacher saying her paper that was due in two weeks needs to be at least halfway done and half of it is due in the morning. And she had a midterm in the morning. So she was pretty upset so I said whenever she needed a study break I would come over and give her a back massage. Before I came over I got her her favorite candy and favorite kind of coffee. Just to try to make her feel better. So anyways I come over we talk for a little then I say I have to get back to doing my school work so I will give you back massage and then leave. She said that sounds perfect but don't pull my pants down when you give me a back massage because I have a bug bite on my butt and then she laughed. So go to her room and as she's putting her coffee on her night stand I tugged on her pants just hard enough that half her butt showed as I was sitting down on the bed. She tried to slap me as hard as she could and I wasn't looking at her so I didn't see it till it her hand was just about to hit me so I moved my head back and her nails scratched my eye. Not to sound like a wuss but nails against your open eye doesn't feel too good lol. Then she tried to punch me in the face but I grabbed her arm and pulled her onto the bed. She then stopped and said you should just leave I asked you not to pull down my pants why would you do that? I said relax I was just trying to be funny but I'm out and left. should I make it into a big deal or should I just let it go?

[Comet]

You tried everything you could to make her feel better but you instead of even ''thank you" received THIS?

Relationships are pretty much like business! Although many play dirty, the core idea is to make mutually beneficial deals... if you give a lot and receive little or even get losses - it's very sh*tty deal!

From your description it seems very bizarre.. you were not in the middle of argument or anything, all was calm and cool and BOOM - she tries to hit you! What the f***? Yes, she was stressed before but c'mon...

My personal advice to you is to cut away the fluffy princess treatment! Yes, a woman can be treaded like a goddess but only if she DESERVES it!

You can make a big deal of this and you can not make a big deal of this, but next time she's stressed and having a hard time - just ignore her!

Or when you have a date instead of a fancy restaurant take her to Burger King!

You seem to be the typical nice guy and typical ''damstel-in-distress-problem-solver&shoulder-to-cry-on-or-bag-to-punch" guy. Don't be such guy!

Don't circulate all your life around her and her pleasure - think also about YOUR pleasure!

There's another very strange thing: you know normally when someone's in problems or someone who is abused in some way - especially if that's someone close to us - we think: "we should try to make themselves feel better, because we want to prove we are good people and she will remember my good deeds and she will get over her problems and stress easier!"

The truth is that people who are abused are EXTREMELY likely to become abusive aswell! Even to people close to them!

When stressed they could rip your insides out and take no responsibility - blame it all on ''bad day'' and all your efforts and good deeds are going down the drain!

[SunSeeker]

Significant others aren't punching bags so that's no excuse for physical abuse. However, not trying to justify her trying to punch you in the face but she clearly asked you not to pull her pants down and you did it anyway. My advice is to pick your battles wisely, the scratch was a result of your inability to respect her wish, be it a joke or not. Let it go.

[ladyofshalott]

I respect that she was having a bad day, but I don't think that she should have done that, especially considering you were there to help her feel better. I'm not saying make a big deal about it, but wait til she's calmed down a bit, once her midterm is over or whatever and discuss it with her. It's possible it was a one time thing, but she didn't just try to slap you, when that didn't work she followed it with trying to punch you. I know she was upset, but that still seems like an overreaction to a harmless joke. Just let her know that you're sorry for pulling her pants down, you didn't mean any harm, but you shouldn't have done it; then proceed to gently inform her that you were not okay with her trying to strike you. If she has a problem with something you did or are doing, then she needs to find a different way to handle it.

That's my opinion at least.

[xzinax2]

i get that she was stressed,but you can't hit people just cause you're stressed,she should apologize,but don't make it a big deal,just act mad till you get an apology,don't fight-just give her the silent treatment

[gotc147]

Had your roles been reversed, you'd be in handcuffs.

[slipslender]

that's not answering the q.

[gotc147]

My point is this question shouldn't need to be asked if you do not support double standards.

[tzdc21]

@slipslender But he's right tho

[tzdc21]

First off, you shouldn't have pulled her pants down after she said not to. Second, she should not have tried to hit you. You both screwed up here.

[Brando]

She sounds crazy. Yeah, despite her stress that's not cool. She should apologize to you.