Why do girls like to mention their "ex"?

[toolt00l]

It feels like every time I like a girl and start getting to know her she brings up her ex. They don't bring it up as the center of the conversation but just seem to use it in a subtle way like. Oh "you're a football fan? my ex boyfriends family loved football so they kind of got me into it." (something a girl I'm interested and talking to recently said to me)

I really hate it when girls do that, does anyone else notice this? Its like they don't bring it up until you're just starting to get to know each other and there might be that mutual interest here.

To me its a sign of not being able to let go, so it makes me feel like I don't have a chance with the girl or that I'd never be able to "replace" her ex.

Is it a negative or positive thing when girls do this? Or is it just casual conversation with no further meaning?

[That-Guy]

I personally don't care about the "ex" coming back into conversation but I know that most people like you don't like hearing about it.

I think it's debatable on what it could mean, either she's not over the ex or she may just be conversating... It's hard to tell really... but don't get intimidated or competitive with her ex, they broke up and now she's looking for better. I'd just roll it off the shoulder but if you feel she's not over him, then I would steer clear... tough since its a judgement call...

For me, to avoid this, if I talk about my ex during dates I just say "my friend," it's the same story with out bringing the ex into the conversation.

[Stunned_Mullet]

only negative if she brings it up in an argument, then its what's referred to as emotional baggage don't sweat it ,it goes away with time as you share more and more experiences together.

[ShootingStar5]

You can't expect a girl to pretend she doesn't have any exes. The past doesn't magically disappear when people enter a new relationship. They're a part of her past experiences and it's normal for them to pop up in conversation every now and then when you're talking about a related subject. It's not really negative or positive if it's just little things like the example you gave and it doesn't mean she can't let go either. It's when a girl is constantly talking about her ex or compares you to him a lot then that's bad news.

[Anonymous]

girls naturally talk more than guys and they weave all their experiences together so to them...football = bobby who played foot ball...or ...a certain movie...yeah I saw that with billy and on and on

it's also about sharing girls like to share their feelings and experiences and just everything...that's why they had knitting circles...lol

mostly it just depends on how much it's done and the context of the mentions. the one you mentioned? so not a big deal

[toolt00l]

yeah I guess it wasn't a big deal, I just over analyze things ha ha thanks

[GothicHazel]

hmmm I only ever bring up my exs if me and my mates are talking about our sexual or dating history really, I'm deffo over him, wasn't even in love with him to start hahaha I try to avoid talking about my history now though cause it intimidates my new boyfriend whos a lot less experinced then me.

Over all its not a positive or negative thing it really depends on the person, but your right some cases are they are still in love with the ex

[Anonymous]

Sometimes it's just a casual thing with no meaning. It's like making a comparison with anyone else...especially if they're still friends. (For instance: "Oh, my brother/cousin/mom/ex loves football.") Sometimes it means that she's still in love with her ex. I still accidentally bring my ex into conversations because I still love him. It doesn't mean that I won't give another guy a chance. It just means that I haven't moved on 100% yet, but I'm working on it. He was a big part of my life and my best friend, so it's only natural that I talk about him some.

Sorry if that's not helpful, but it really depends on the girl and the individual circumstance. There are other old exes that I bring up occasionally, but for them, it has no further meaning because I have no current feelings for them.

[LoneKitten]

Could be several things. I bring up my ex because I was with him for so long, he was a big part of everything I did for years. Don't take it as her not being able to let go. in this instance, it seems more like her just explaining how she got started liking the sport. Don't take it to heart :)

[NYChic]

They're trying to gauge your reaction, make you jealous. They want to know if you like them, because if you do they think you will either act jealous yourself, ask if you still have feelings for the ex, or change the subject because you feel uncomfortable. Basically, they want to know if you like them like they like you.

[AliceMcKay]

For me, my ex sucked, so when I bring him up to my boyfriend it is to say he is way better than the former. Don't take it as her not letting go, it is just something that happens in a conversation.

[Anonymous]

I don't like talking about the past so I rarely bring up an ex.