Presidential Four-Way Deathmatch: WHO WILL WIN?

Waffles731

Presidential Four-Way Deathmatch: WHO WILL WIN?

So I'm tired of getting overly political and shit, so phrase it in a way that all little boys think: Apply the "my dad could beat up your dad" logic to the candidates. Why? Because I goddamn feel like it that's why.

The CONTENDERS!

1. From the land that is known as NEW YORK CITY; DONALD TRUMP!

Presidential Four-Way Deathmatch: WHO WILL WIN?

2. From the back alleys and blood-drenched streets of Chicago; HILLARY CLINTON!

Presidential Four-Way Deathmatch: WHO WILL WIN?

3. From the very same back alley's and blood drenched streets as Clinton we have; JILL STEIN!

Presidential Four-Way Deathmatch: WHO WILL WIN?

(There really isn't an intimidating picture of her out there)

4. From the Rough lands of Minot North Dakota where the west is still Wild we have; GARY JOHNSON!

Presidential Four-Way Deathmatch: WHO WILL WIN?

That is the Summit of Puncak Jaya, the tallest mountain in Oceania

So who will win and who will lose.

1. The first to die; JILL STEIN.

Look, it's no secret that Jill Stein is a physician, that whole "do no harm" thing, she takes that seriously. Clinton or Trump kills her with a single punch.

2. The Second to die; HILLARY CLINTON.

Despite being younger than Donald Trump, she looks like she has the problems of someone in their eighties bone wise. She is out. Trump kills her because he hates her guts, which is like 25 percent of his entire platform (which is actually down from the platform of Mitt Romney which was pretty much 100 percent just Fuck Obama).

3. The Last to die; DONALD TRUMP.

Look its obvious that Donald Trump isn't physically fit, in fact none of them are except Mr. Gary (I climbed the tallest mountain on all seven continents) Johnson. I'd be willing to be that after one or two punches Donald Trump would be Winded. The fact is that Gary Johnson is a EXPERT Mountaineer. He's got stamina and muscle and Donald Doesn't really have either. Gary Johnson kills him with a single kick.

The Winner

GARY JOHNSON.

Presidential Four-Way Deathmatch: WHO WILL WIN?
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Most Helpful Guy

  • WhereAmI
    They really need to bring back the claymation deathmatch stuff. That would be hilarious.
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girl

  • helloitsmethere
    Well duh! Give me my $500 I was betting on this.
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

25
  • TokyoGhoulLover
    '-' Plot twist the llama wins, also deezenuts for vice president
  • Saoirse_Nua
    As long as Trump doesn't win - That is my main concern
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  • SvetlanaSavachenko
    I just don't see an unknown who's stands on important issues haven't reached the public's ears or eyes like the 2 prominent parties. Most people don't have the time or even if they do won't take the time to search to see where Johnson stands on vital issues. We all know where killary and Trump stand. Until the lesser known parties get some in your face prime time media coverage I'm afraid they won't ever go far. They may have better candidates but unless the candidates are heard they don't stand a chance. For example how much coverage did Ron Paul get in the past 2 elections? Not much. Not many people even knew who Ron Paul was much less he was better than either of the candidates from the 2 prominent parties. I think Rand Paul would have been better than what we've got to pick from.
  • Fathoms77
    Oh yeah, what the heck happened to that show? LOL
  • anonman32
    Nice mytake man, its refreshing.
  • Dred1614returns
    Very accurate
  • andy009
    Lol trump wins because he is crazy... End of story
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