Should I go to the same college as my ex?

[Anonymous]

Could you understand where I am coming? I'm going to grad school this fall. At first, I did not want to go there because he went there. Now, I want to go not to because everyone said it a good school and affordable. But part of me want to go so I can prove or make making my ex regret dumping me by looking good and dressing the best. I have been lying to myself. This is not going to work. Who is to say he is will care. I am not in control of this. Honestly, I hope I could avoid him, while I am there as much as possible. I am realizing its not even worth it. But I still want to go to school there but for my education and NOT prove something to someone who doesn't care?

What could go wrong?

Should I still go?

[rdr005]

You've got to self check yourself real hard. Put him out of the picture completely and start researching schools that are in your field and their ratings and retention rates. Make an objective decision. If you see him or not, doesn't matter. You won't be the first person to go to the same school as their ex. But don't prove yourself to him. It will burn you out... because odds are is that he'll move on. But lets look at the flip side. Lets suppose he does regret and realize how great you are...? Then what? You gonna take him back? You gonna cash in all that work just to laugh in his face? Its simply not worth going to a school just because of someone else, whether you love them or not. That's why there are long distance relationships and such... for people who still love each other, but are still passionate for themselves and their personal endeavors. Look out for yourself. If its a good school, and you can succeed there, and he won't be an issue to you, go for it. You can make him jealous by being yourself. You're success will be enough. Even if you don't go to the same school... if he was ever attracted to you at all, he'd probably be one of those idiots that stalks you on facebook and sees how you're doing, so he'd notice eventually. Otherwise he doesn't care.

[Anonymous]

You should choose a school based on how good of a fit you think it is for you in terms of location and program for your area of study. If that school happens to be the same school your ex-boyfriend is going to, then go there and don't worry about him.

Just don't base an expensive life decision on a guy (I think you're already aware of this). I know that it's tempting to want to show him what he is missing, as most people feel that way after being dumped. However, the truth is that going to the same university as him doesn't guarantee that he'll come crawling back. I once knew a girl who accepted a school's offer of admission just because this guy she liked went there. A month later, he ended up getting a girlfriend (who he is still with), and the girl regretted following him to school.

[Asker]

Yeah, I know. I am not expecting or wanting him to come back to me. I am not in control of that. I just know I am realizing it doesn't even matter. I just feel a little guilty knowing my ex goes to a school I want go