I'm constantly disappointing my boyfriend . What can I do ?

We have been together for almost a year now and I admit we have had many bumps in the road but ... When ever he needs me I'm never there .. and its not that I don't want to its just that I'm either asleep or I'm away from my phone .And he tells me I'm useless and that I'm all these things and he's just told me that he wants to leave me for another woman ...me and him are in a long distance relationship .an. mme and him had plans to see each other next week ... Just a few days ago he drops some hints about marrying me and stuff . But now he's telling me that I'm making him feel trapped ... I love this man with all my heart and soul and I don't want to leave him ... How can I preserve what we have and make our relationship into something stronger


Most Helpful Guy

  • You two need some space, try a week without talking. In that time, write down on a piece of paper of the pros and cons. What your expectation are for yourself and as a couple. Are you expectation for each other realistic? Long distance is hard. So there should be some ground rules per say of what days you guys will set time aside to talk with each other. Why does he need you at night when you are asleep? Time change? East/West coast relationship?

    • Certain times its cause he's working late or some family stuff comes up .. and were both on the west coast so no time change or anything .. even right now he's about to head into his night job and sometimes I have to remind him to bring stuff but .. he's telling me that the other girl already told him to do that and ... He keeps going on about how much better she is than me ..

    • If he is already comparing you to her in that manner, that shows very little respect for you and what relationship you "share". I would put a large "mental" distance between him. There is very little love in commentary like that.

What Guys Said 2

  • Your long distance relationship is definitely taking a toll in your relationship.

    If all you do is fight among small things now, it would be fair that you'll call it quits and you go find a new guy of interest. This relationship can't be salvaged anymore if your boyfriend continues to badmouth you.


What Girls Said 3

  • Do a better job of keeping your phone on you, turn the volume up on it before you go to sleep. If that is your main form of communication and he's calling when he needs you to be there for him, and you if you really love him and want to keep this relationship going, then that phone should be bumped up a bit on your priority list.

    • It is .. I bring my charger with me everywhere and its always on so I'm able to be there .. I just don't know how to have him see that I really am putting my all into this relationship ..

  • "And he tells me I'm useless and that I'm all these things"

    He's clingy and needy (you're not at your phone 24/7? GASP!) and verbally abusive. It's not worth it. Guys like him will continue to criticize you and drain you dry, because what you do is never good enough due to their messed-up standards. Ugh.

  • Wow, this guy has some nerves. First off, if you are in a relationship, he is cheating on you by talking to this girl the way he has been. He probably wants to leave the relationship, but still wants to feel as if he hasn't done anything wrong, so is blaming you for things he didn't want to mention before. He doesn't seem like he is good for you, I say you just dump him and try to get over him. Also, I am sorry to YOU for criticizing him, if it hurt your feelings. And I am sorry you had to go through this. I hope everything works out for the better.