Why does my boyfriend act so heartless?

[Anonymous]

Okay long story short, We've been together for 3 years and we also have 16 month old baby together. For the past year and half he has been so terrible. He's moody and so mean! Its so bad I have to ask him who's the woman in our relationship.

Well he works and I don't but that's only because I can't find one, and YES I have been trying very hard. Even subways in my area aren't hiring. But anyways, it makes me sad that he treats me the way he does. Examples: I'll spend all day doing the laundry, picking up after our son and I exercise 2 hours a day. Oh, dinner will also be ready and done. So he gets home, throws his clothes on the floor and then gets mad that he can't find his pajamas. Then I bring him his plate and starts to play his PS3 and he yells at me to get our son cause he's in the way. No hey babe, thanks for dinner or the room looks great!

I just feel unappreciated and unloved. I wanna break up with him but he says he loves me. I just don't understand how he loves me but he still acts so mean. I know hell be there for our son but my family wants me to stay. Its just not fair cause I treat him so great and he treats me so bad. I wanna break up...Oh were both 20.

[Anonymous]

i don't understand why women always want to be appreciated for cleaning the house. I do that sh*t all the time because it HAS to be done. no one is ever thanking me. do you thank him when he comes home for working and making money? do you ever thank your self for showering? probably not. because that sh*t is mandatory. the dinner part. since your a stay at home mom at the moment that is your duty. I understand you wanting to feel appreciated, but for cooking and cleaning? I mean your parents probably cleaned up your sh*t all the time while raising you, and cooking meals, did you thank them every time?

you're young, he's young. he's going to be stupid. you're going to be stupid. he could being mean for a lot of reasons. it's called reality kicking in, he is starting to realize he will have to work 10-15 hours a day for the rest of his life, he now has a child to take care of (having a kid for a man is a pretty scary thing. guess who gets to pay 200-600 dollars a week in child support if you guys break up?), etc. not everyone can deal with that sort of thing in a fashionable manner. maybe work is bringing him down, maybe it could be other things. maybe not enough sex, I don't know, only you and him do.

if you're extremely unhappy to the point you are a total wreck every day, then sure break up. if that makes you happy. but the #1 thing you have to think about is your kid. how will he/she feel growing up seeing several different father figures?

honestly though, you know what would be the easiest thing? just sit HIM down and tell HIM how you are feeling. tell HIM you feel unappreciated and unloved instead of telling other people.

[darko87]

Sometimes its nice to be appreciated for anything and its diffrent with kids you prick don't give an anser if you don't have a f***ing clue

[Asker]

Thanks you darko87. I do appreciate him and I tell him all the time. I'm not a annoying girl that whines and complains over everything he does. And yes I appreciate my parents also.it just makes me sad.And child support is the farthset thing from my mind. I also do try to talk to him but he won't tell me anything. He won't open up to me and the reason why I ask other people is because its nice to have a honest opinion from a different perspective. Its nice to know that some people can relate to m

[Asker]

Oh and the several father figure comment...im not a hoe! He's actually my first boyfriend so yeah...that's not gonna happen. I said in the question that he's gonna be there. My son will always have his father.

[Miss_All_Time_Low]

So much respect. -_-

Most women should be appreciated because these days, they usually earn money, take care of their baby, clean the whole house and NOT cheat on their husband who doesn't lift a finger to help. (Well, though I know lots of nice, evolved men that do the same as her.)

It's not about cleaning the house, mate. If you're in a relationship, even if you don't pick up their underwear, you should feel loved and respected.

Get your facts straight.

[darko87]

Ok there are two reasons that I can think of 1 he is still crapping is self about being a dad and takes it out on you. Or (and sorry bout this one) he is a tw.at he may say he loves you but by the sound or it they are just words to him maby go stay with your family for a week or two just so he can see what its like to be alone he needs to appreciate you and its nothing to do with you not having a job its hard to find one now only agency are getting hired because there cheep. Have you told him this maby he doesn't know he is doing it. Oh and tell him to look for his own dam pajamas and get his own plate he's not so stupid he don't know how to look is he?

[Asker]

Hmmm...umm what's tw. I will give that a try then...staying with my mom. Thanks...=(

[missymoo]

I think he means twat...

[darko87]

Yea thanks I hope it work out for you and him

[jhova23]

He didn't want a family. He feels trapped hoping you will leave but when you start to he doesn't want to be the reason. Also he maybe cheating. His attitude towards you is coming from somewhere very unpleasant. It could have something you are doing. The list is endless if what could be setting him off, but most likely he feels chained down and isn't man enough to discuss it with you.