This is long, but I really have no one else to vent to about this and I am hoping to get a little advice.
It has almost been a year with this guy. It started off amazing, we met on the game and were dating long distance due to him being stationed in the UK. But lately, the past two months have been awful like he completely lost interest. It was hot and cold. I was confused and constantly getting hurt.
I asked for a break about a week ago, and he said it was due to depression and didn't want me to leave him completely. I thought I would give him another chance, but I just kept getting hurt and got my hopes up as the good times ended less than a week later as he went back to distancing himself. I couldn't take it anymore... I was way too hurt. I don't even know if I believe him or if I know the real reasons.
So a few days ago I decided to break off with no contact. I told him I would stop playing video games with him and talking to him because I needed a break and I was just hurting way too much, but the message I sent was kind of mean... and I regret wording it the way I did. He only responded "Okay then." and never really apologized.
He was never really the type to try hard to keep me around. Like it seemed like he was okay to let me go. But, I spied on the game and he kept everything the same, even kept my title above his head like everything was okay. But never bothers to try to communicate or fix things.
I am having a really hard time with this. I don't know if it's better off giving up and continuing to be miserable without him, or if I should try going back and be miserable with him. Would he even take me back though? or is he tired of me? does he actually see me as someone important? I really don't know what to do. I have a feeling that he won't try to ever come back to me... and I know that he didn't treat me the best this last two months. But I miss him. I'm just conflicted, I don't want to be bipolar as this isn't the first time I have done this.
It has almost been a year with this guy. It started off amazing, we met on the game and were dating long distance due to him being stationed in the UK. But lately, the past two months have been awful like he completely lost interest. It was hot and cold. I was confused and constantly getting hurt.
I asked for a break about a week ago, and he said it was due to depression and didn't want me to leave him completely. I thought I would give him another chance, but I just kept getting hurt and got my hopes up as the good times ended less than a week later as he went back to distancing himself. I couldn't take it anymore... I was way too hurt. I don't even know if I believe him or if I know the real reasons.
So a few days ago I decided to break off with no contact. I told him I would stop playing video games with him and talking to him because I needed a break and I was just hurting way too much, but the message I sent was kind of mean... and I regret wording it the way I did. He only responded "Okay then." and never really apologized.
He was never really the type to try hard to keep me around. Like it seemed like he was okay to let me go. But, I spied on the game and he kept everything the same, even kept my title above his head like everything was okay. But never bothers to try to communicate or fix things.
I am having a really hard time with this. I don't know if it's better off giving up and continuing to be miserable without him, or if I should try going back and be miserable with him. Would he even take me back though? or is he tired of me? does he actually see me as someone important? I really don't know what to do. I have a feeling that he won't try to ever come back to me... and I know that he didn't treat me the best this last two months. But I miss him. I'm just conflicted, I don't want to be bipolar as this isn't the first time I have done this.
