Do girls want emotional guys?

[Anonymous]

When it comes to emotions, there is no winning for guys. Girls say they want a guy to open up, talk about his feelings, be a human...then they get upset he doesn't. However, when a guy does decide to open up, girls (and his peers) think he is too emotional, pathetic, and there is no mystery or attraction. So what to do?

Updates

+1 y

Thanks for all the great answers!

The question is reopen now, though I accidently selected a mho.

Feel free to voice your opinions!

[Lopezz1999]

I understand your confusion. I was once one of those guys that fell into this exact same trap, but I've learned with experience and pure logic that this isn't what that want at all.

Women are emotional creature, possessing an emotional mind. Many of the things that they do have to do with how they feel. That being said, as a man, you tend to thing with rationale and logic.

By becoming emotional to them by showing your feelings to them, being emotionally reactive to what they say to you, and etc, you are in their eyes.. another woman. Woman are not attracted to other emotional creatures, even bisexual and homosexual women. You cannot be emotional towards women because women already think emotionally, causing them to lose attraction for you. Though this brings me to a new point.

Although women say that they want an emotional guy, they're sort of correct, but mostly wrong. Instead, women need someone to make them "feel" something in order for an attraction to exist. You may have heard of women crying to sad and tragic movies that they have seen, feeling bad for the main characters or even catching an attraction for the male because they have successfully made the woman feel something. Look at abusive boyfriends as well. Although the women already know that their boyfriends are bad for them, abusive boyfriends manage to keep their girlfriend around because they're (unfortunately) insecure, and those abusive boyfriends exploit that weakness by making their girlfriends feel worse about themselves, keeping an attraction in the air.
Even with getting over unreciprocated crushes.., because the girl has already taken an interest in the guy, whatever that guy does (even when the girl is trying to move on), he makes her wonder whether or not he's still interested, and that's proof that he is successfully making the woman feel something, whatever that feeling may be.

My main point is, you can't ever use your emotions to try to create an attraction with a girl. It will never work.. unless you are able to appeal to her emotions. They are already emotional, and women are not attracted to other emotional creatures. If you want the better girlfriend, you're going to have to make her feel like she's worth greatness without losing yourself in the process (as mentioned in paragraph 2). Make her feel something, and you'll do well. Good luck.

[Lopezz1999]

Paragraph 3*

[GreatnessBack]

You can talk about you feelings, but the important ones.
Don't go vagina bleeding your heart all over the place
And don't look like this guy
img.pr0gramm.com/2014/10/23/e711de191c99c61a.jpg

[KINGNIGGA123]

Perfect

[Asker]

That's Spiderman... His uncle just died man

[Asker]

Wow I accidentally gave this MHO and closed this question... Whoops

[KINGNIGGA123]

😂😂😂😂 😂 you dun messed up

[Asker]

:( I feel had for the gag community now

[Asker]

bad*

[GreatnessBack]

Not Uncle Ben death from 1. The one from 3 when MJ broke up with him. He started crying like a baby.

[Asker]

He loved MJ... It broke his heart :(

You will understand if you have ever been in Love.

[TiredGirl123]

What women want is an emotionally mature man that can express his feelings in a respectful, healthy manner. This means that we want him to be able to tell us when he is feeling happy, sad, angry, unsure, etc. in a respectful and mature way.

If he is mad at us, sure let him have his space for a little bit but he should be able to come to us and explain why he is mad without being aggressive like people typically expect. He shouldn't just ignore us until he magically feels better.

Also, I don't care what y'all will say men feel the urge to cry and that's ok. Your mom died? You just nearly cut your finger off cutting potatoes? Broke up with gf? Yes it's OK to cry. But just like with emotionally immature girls, we don't want them sobbing over every little thing. Have a little grit.

When emotional we mean we want him to express his affection for us. Tell us you love/care about us, be physically comforting, if you feel safe open up about yourself and tell us things you wouldn't tell most people.

I think there's many emotionally damaged males who could get help from a therapist to feel better but don't because of societal pressure to "be a man" and not show emotion. Women who make fun of men for crying, etc. further this.

[AriadneSky]

express yourself honestly without losing control. expressing emotion does not mean being lout of control emotionally.

that goes for anyone regardless of sex. human beings have emotion. before thought there is emotion. whether you can articulate it or not it is there. a person who is intelligent enough to articulate it instead of grunting or throwing a tantrum bc they locked everything up for so long -a lot of people do that bc they think it looks cool to look cold. but stuff comes out eventually tantrums are not cool. violence is worse- is very attractive. if your girlfriend can not handle the real you she's immature and you can't trust her. best to get out.

[AriadneSky]

emotional repression results in violence. many people would rather be caught beating the shit out of an innocent person, than crying. _thats_ pathetic. an dangerous.

[RJGraveyTrain]

Everything requires balance.

I was raised to be a tough cookie, even though I had times in my life where I admittedly wasn't. You have to have thick skin and to know when to toughen up, but you also have to know that expressing shit is necessary for your own sanity. I want a guy to be in control of his emotions the way I am and be able to express them in a healthy way. Some dudes just absolutely take it to an extreme and go off the deep end, letting a bad day bring them to their knees while they bawl and blubber how they're such a nice guy and don't deserve any hardships. That is where I draw the line because that's mental and emotional weakness.

[Chico_brah]

" tough cookie" lol

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Chico_brah No amount of milk with soften me up bruh

[traveler68]

Yep, a difference between being emotional and red flag behavior.

[Jamesol1]

Here is another tough cookie.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRfCpQx_FDE

[Jamesol1]

I may be wrong but you sound like the kind of girl that goes around thinking she can beat up men.

[Leandri]

I like this... well said

[FroggyDoggy96]

Yeah your life was probably real tough being a fairly attractive white girl (probably from the U. S) lol. No shade, just saying that I don't believe you are in the best position to criticize emotionally challenged men.

[Leandri]

@FroggyDoggy96 Who are you talking to?

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Leandri The girl who posted this, RJGraveyTrain.

[Leandri]

@FroggyDoggy96 okay okay

[RJGraveyTrain]

@FroggyDoggy96 Lmao. I like that me being white and female automatically makes you assume I couldn't have had a tough upbringing and therefore have no right to exercise an opinion. Also I don't see how my attractiveness relates to this period but good "debate" pal.

I stand by what I say regardless of my skin colour and genitals.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@FroggyDoggy96 Also, I'm Canadian. If you're going to criticize me get your facts straight at least. Lol.

[traveler68]

@Both of you - happy Valentines Day!

[RJGraveyTrain]

@traveler68 Happy Valentines Day.

[Jamesol1]

He said ''probably from the U. S''... so get YOUR facts straight love.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Jamesol1 It was still an incorrect assumption, "love." Lol.

[Chico_brah]

You know what I love? White people...

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Chico_brah Lmao.

[Jamesol1]

You said facts not assumption. There is a difference.

[Chico_brah]

@Jamesol1 Just like there is a difference with whites in comparison to every other race in the world in regards to privilege of socioeconomic status?

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Jamesol1 My point was that f someone wanted to criticize me, claim that my race and gender somehow insinuated that I am unable to have had any sort of trial or difficult upbringing that they could be assed to not assume they know where I'm from. To assume I'm American is in fact wrong, would have taken two seconds to fact check that, my profile is public, just as much as it is a fact that me being white, female and kind of attractive is totally irrelevant.

[Jamesol1]

It isn't irrelevant to privileged. Being a woman, white and attractive... probably the most privileged group. And I don't think many can be bothered to check your profile? Canada is basically the shitty version of the US so he wasn't far off.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Jamesol1 Me being white and female doesn't mean that my life was easy. I won't give you the sob story but I didn't have it easy, no one ever stop to tell me I was white so I wouldn't have to deal with personal shit. You don't know what my past was like.

[traveler68]

Isn't this like beating a dead horse?

[RJGraveyTrain]

@traveler68 Former debate team captain, I don't tend to take shit laying down. Lol.

[traveler68]

Not suprised. If you tweet Trump be sure and let me in on it.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@traveler68 Lmao I will, promise.

[Jamesol1]

''Former debate team captain'' lol god knows how.

[Chico_brah]

@Jamesol1 Why don't you actually try to out debate her with some wit and intelligence rather than going on this notion of "Oh she is a pretty white girl" That literally holds no substance at all.

[RJGraveyTrain]

Lmao

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Chico_brah my sentiments exactly 😂

[Jamesol1]

@Chico_brah I don't know what the original argument was about... I comment on too many things to keep tabs... i dunno if someone replies i reply back... im too lazy half the time to try and 'out speak' people like my ego depends on it... like some on here.

[Jamesol1]

@Chico_brah I didn't even look at her picture properly until now... maybe i was wrong. It is generally the very attractive females that have everything given to them. I'm sure if you are moderately good looking female there are some benefits. I just assumed she was a solid 8 from what others were saying.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Jamesol1 Lol dude I've literally never been given anything in my life based on my appearance and I was an ugly as shit teen. That's the issue of assuming things without any grounds other than: "Ah you're white and kinda good looking, that discredits everything you say." It's a cheap, illogical way of basically passive aggressively letting out personal biased onto other people, which I assume is based solely on the fact that I'm female and subsequently that gives you a reason to have something against me. Lol. My opinion, like it or not, was based on my personal experiences, and while in comparison to other people, yes, I didn't have the "hardest" life, I didn't have shit easy. Very few people have had everything in their lives handed to them, myself included. So if you wanna gun for me based on some kind of magical privilege you made up in your head you're gonna have a hard time selling that to any kind of rational person without proof other than: "You're a white girl."

[Chico_brah]

@Jamesol1 Well having said that, I don't think your in any type of justification to make a mockery of what she is saying there. It doesn't take too much sustained effort to speed read through the contextual information surrounding an opinion. If you're going to make call someone out on something, then at least followup with it. I personally think you saying that you're too busy to read everything is a convenient excuse in attempt to sort of back pedal out from a real debate that requires some cognitive thought process.

You guys are both coming at her but not really offering her anything to counter argue. Saying she is privileged because she is a pretty white girl has no substance behind it when you say it the way you did. There is no followup. Just sort of this notion of I'm right and you're wrong because I'm a man. At the very least I'd try to follow up to validate my statements.

[Chico_brah]

@Jamesol1
The way you two are coming at her sort of reminds me of this scene of step brothers at 1:50 lol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czg3zyC2g_Q

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Chico_brah #savage

[Jamesol1]

@Chico_brah I'm not reading all that bitter crap. I can't be bothered to read back at what i said etc and what you said. Lol at ''savage'' i don't care or read half the shit you say. Best of luck to you all... please do give a good paragraph replying to this comment... of which i won't read... so you can all feed your own egos. Bottom line is I have forgotten what the hell is even being debated anymore. Have fun.

[Jamesol1]

@Chico_brah And one thing i did remeber reading was ''You know what I love? White people...''. Not sure what that is about... give your white yourself. You sound like one of those alt-left wing white male haters on buzzfeed. Anyways i've said too much. x

[RJGraveyTrain]

@Jamesol1 Okay bye bye love you too <3

[Chico_brah]

@Jamesol1 fuck that shit blah blah blah. Lol okay then man be on you're way. Can't fuck with varsity when you on JV. Your comments have no substance if you can't back them up.

That white comment a sarcastic comment mocking what you said. You're too dense to even realize it lol.

[Asker]

Hey RJ, great opinion!

Are you a mod? Can you reopen this question and remove the MHO?

I have accidentally closed it :(

[RJGraveyTrain]

Thanks OP. I am a mod but I don't have the authorization to reopen questions and remove MHO. You'd have to contact an admin to inquire about that.

[Asker]

How do I do that? Or can you let them know?

[RJGraveyTrain]

https://www.girlsaskguys.com/contact

Or you can message them directly.

[Asker]

Thank you, I will try that...

Who is an Admin I can message? Anyone online now?

[FroggyDoggy96]

I never said you can't have an opinion, nor did I say you couldn't have had a tough upbringing. My point was that you have been given a handful of advantages to where if you were to compare yourself to an emotionally challenged male who has difficulty with girls, your identity as a fairly attractive white girl from Canada gives you a lot more to fall back on then said male. Also, I said you are PROBABLY from U. S, I didn't say you were. You accused me of saying something as a fact, when I didn't.

[Chico_brah]

@FroggyDoggy96 That's the issue here though. She doesn't have any more privileges than you do. Born at a higher socioeconomic status is a priverlege. Being a female alone is not a privilege. I absolutely can't stand that word in regards to topic like this.

You are not within rational thought by any means. You self identify as an emotionally challenged male who has difficulty with women. You're acting as if you are the only one in this world who has issues. We all have our own battles and they are certainly not dictated on absolute level by being male or female.

If you are consistent with your logic, then you would be suggesting that I am an emotionally challenged male who experiences difficulties with women as well for the sole fact that I am a male.

[Chico_brah]

@FroggyDoggy96
People look at me and do the same thing and I shut them down every time. They say I don't have to work as hard in the gym because I already have good genetics. Those guys with so called bad genetics have to apparently work much harder.
cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...f-812d-a49f8d20f13a.jpg
cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...f-9a9d-f5f873781f42.jpg
This is called I prep every fucking meal that I put into my body and train everyday. This is a product of hard work not genetics.

People also tell me that I always must of had it easy in school because I'm 'smart'. "If I was as smart as you then I could do engineering as well"
No dude. They wanted to place me in special ed at one point in elementary school because they thought I was retarded. I didn't know I had ADHD at the time. I work my ass off in school and have had a lot of struggles along the way. I'm close to graduating. Again that has nothing to do with me having a privilege.

[Chico_brah]

I was an absolute shithead in high school getting in fights and missing classes. I lacked confidence and hated myself. I got sent to a continuation high school because it got so bad. I enlisted in the Marine Corps delayed entry program my senior year of high school. I left to bootcamp and graduated Oct24th 2011 with India CO PLT 2011. That was the proudest day of my life. I saw an issue and I fixed it. I dealt with it. Did I bitch about having shitty genetics of me being prone to insecurity or and anger issues? No I fucking fixed it through again, hard work. I never had any privileges and yet people like to tell me I did all the time without even knowing my story.

[Chico_brah]

@FroggyDoggy96 If you have trouble with women and your default is to say that I'm stuck this way then you are feeble minded. You are literally pointing fingers saying at others saying they have what they have because they are privileged in attempt to rationalize your own lack of action to actually fix things. That's fucking ridiculous. Wake up and preach the "Privilege" stuff to someone else.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@FroggyDoggy96 I have to agree with Chico I'm afraid. Me being white has no relevancy in my opinion, I think that you just disregarded what I said and decided to attack my opinion based on my appearance, which just goes to show that while I may not be at the same disadvantage as some, people are so quick to put my opinion down based solely on my gender and race, which is exactly what people compare their struggles to. I was single for most of my life and struggled with dating, it wasn't a cake walk for me like you assume. I get that people have emotional challenges and that's fine, but I am not into guys who can't handle the regular struggles of life. I don't think they're bad people but they're not dating material for me which was my point. So you pointing out that I'm white, female, and from a western country still has no relevancy since this isn't about race or gender. It's about preference.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@FroggyDoggy96 So you can cry to me all you want about how I have some privilege or advantage over you but plain and simple, life is what you make of it. I had serious emotional issues - diagnosed with depression, OCD, and GA disorder. No one once patted me on the head and said: "Don't worry, being pretty and white will magically fix all of those problems for you." Because it doesn't work that way. Because none of that has anything to do with my race, gender or where I'm from. That's just a cop-out to say: "I feel like I'm at a disadvantage, so I'll just blame it all on girls because they don't have sympathy for my plight."

Sorry, but once again, I don't think your point stands up. Sure, argue race and gender all you want but that's not the core of the issue here - in my opinion it just seems like a cop out to get out of the hard truth that men like this don't want to face up to the fact that unless you learn how to work your shit out, you're not going to be successful romantically.

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah Although my dialogue was with her, I'll give you a response since you put so much effort into yours. I am not an emotionally challenged man, nor do I necessarily have issues with women. I would say that my difficulty with women arises from the fact that I have high standards, almost to a fault. It would take me forever to respond to all your comments, but I will say that just because you eat right and bust your ass to work out, doesn't mean you don't have good genetics that privilege you to end up with a better body than others. Please research what a mesomorph is compared to an ectomorph/endomorph. I say all this as a mesomorph myself. Even though I don't work out much, I am fairly in shape.

[FroggyDoggy96]

Firstly, let me reiterate; I myself am not an emotionally challenged man, and if I settled for anything less than the attractive, smart, and nice girl that I want, I'd have had a bunch of girlfriends by now. I just got a good looking girls number today (but the point here is to say my high standards, not emotions, are what challenges me).

Secondly, it seems like you are trying to soften up your initial argument because I've called you out while you were on your high horse. Initially, you said that these emotional men will "bawl and blubber", and even said they were mentally and emotionally weak. Not only was it inappropriate for you to say this considering the fact that you have a long history of having a few screws loose mentally (depression, OCD, GA, etc...), but the point still stands that it is easier for you considering your privileges which you yourself have acknowledged.

I have no need to cop out, as a third party, I am simply calling you out on your obvious bs. No offense.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@FroggyDoggy96 In what way is me having a personal preference bs exactly? That's where you lost me. You ignored everything I said and immediately just jumped to "you're a white female, you're privileged" the only privilege I have is people won't assume I'm a thug and I'm less likelyg to be hit by someone of the opposite sex which has nothing to do with the topic. You didn't call me out on anything, you just seemed to take the fact that I find the types of people to blame the world to heart and therefore diverged the issue to my skin colour and the fact that I have a vagina. Nothing I said was bullshit and I'm not on any high horse, I said, plain and simple: people need to have balance, everyone should be emotional but not to the point where it cripples you. If it does, that's something you have to work on.

So please, I don't get where there is anything wrong with that. It seems your only quarrel with me is the fact that more men will throw themselves at me. Lol.

[RJGraveyTrain]

Also I'm not softening up my argument. Lol. It is exactly what I said before: balance is key.

[FroggyDoggy96]

Your bs is not having a personal preference, your bs is calling out emotionally challenged men for their difficulties interacting with women (due to their emotions), when you yourself have been emotionally challenged for a substantially long time, and also never had it as bad as them, nor ever will (because of your privileges).

Once again: your preference for emotionally strong men isn't the bullshit part, the bullshit part is that you have attacked their character as being weak and consisting of blubbering on their knees, when you have not been disadvantaged to the levels that they have and have in hypocritical fashion, been emotionally challenged time and time again yourself.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@FroggyDoggy96 I didn't call out emotionally challenged men though, lol. I didn't call anyone out, I made a reference to a personality type to provide an example of the type of person I am not attracted to and why. I didn't attack any group of people, you're the one that came at me. I also never EVER referenced men who had issues talking to women until you brought it up. I think you are twisting what i said to fit your own personal narrative and turning it into something that it isn't.

I didn't attack anybody's character, I personally believe that if you're the type of person to cry if you spill coffee on your shirt or have your whole day ruined over some simple shit that you're emotionally weak - yes. That's not an attack, to me that's true. If that's how you are that's fine but we aren't compatible, period. Everybody has their shit and if that's yours I'm sure you have your reasons, I won't shit on you but you're not my type. That's it. Lol.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@FroggyDoggy96 I'm sorry if that apparently rustles your jimmies dude but I 100% stand by everything I say and clearly I'm not the only one who agrees. It's your right to disagree but I frankly thinks this has nothing to do with the core of what I said and everything to do with some conception that comes from some personal biases and issue with me being a woman. So "no shade" and "no offence" but we equally think the other is full of shit and likely won't find common ground here. Lol.

[FroggyDoggy96]

Yup you're right about one thing; we're not gonna find common ground. As someone who is privileged enough to be a fairly attractive white female from Canada (wow, would you look at all those priveleges!), it's clear that you are blinded to your advantages versus the emotional male, whom you cannot relate to on a level of struggle - because you have had it easier than them - once again, please read back to your privileges.

Once again, you attempt to soften up your initial argument. Initially, you stated that a bad day will break these guys down emotionally, which is why you called them mentally and emotionally weak. Now, you're rephrasing that to say that IF "simple shit" is what caused the bad day, THEN in that case they are actually emotionally weak. You are continually having to concede certain points and readjust your argument because you have been struck down from your high horse.

How can you be blinded to how your privileges play into this, and at your own hypocrisy? Baffling

[RJGraveyTrain]

@FroggyDoggy96 lmao alright dude you're literally too ridiculous for me to take seriously. If it makes you feel better to tell me my pussy makes me privileged in comparison to a specific group of males, go for it if it gives you some kind of satisfaction but you are literally fighting about an issue I never even brought up. You just clearly saw something that related just enough to a personal issue to get some kind of pent up aggression out toward a woman of a specific group that you clearly have an issue with.

Again, don't get the high horse comment, I'm an average ass girl with an opinion who doesn't agree with you. That's all. Lol. You're fucking turning this simple opinion to fit some delusional idea of what you think I said and what you think my life is, you're not striking me down from anything because I still stand by everything I say.

But hey man whatever makes you feel better to believe. Good luck to you. 😂

[FroggyDoggy96]

Hah! Nice try, average ass girl? I can't keep listing your privileges over and over again, and I haven't the time to list the many ways in which they make it so much easier for you. Also, please go ask any male or female who has it easier in the dating world, men or women. Come back to me when you have figured out the obvious answer of whose "genitals" are more beneficial, especially if being emotionally challenged comes in to play.

Forget the high horse comment, I now see you are incapable of seeing that you are attacking from a position that advantages you to these emotionally challenged men.

Finally, I would like to say that you have every right to your opinion, I'm just pointing out that it doesn't hold much weight. Just like you have an opinion, so do I. It's just that decades upon decades of sociological, psychological, and gender studies would support my opinion about how your privileges play into all this to your advantage, and to the disadvantage of the men you called weak.

[Chico_brah]

@FroggyDoggy96

" I am not an emotionally challenged man, nor do I necessarily have issues with women."

"it's clear that you are blinded to your advantages versus the emotional male, whom you cannot relate to on a level of struggle"

__

These two statements of yours seem a tad contradicting. My question is why would you feel the need to deceit in the midst of an argument like that. You are essentially crippling your whole argument by doing this. Your argument is no longer genuine because you are not being honest.

[Chico_brah]

These two statements of yours seem a tad contradicting. My question is why would you feel the need to deceit in the midst of an argument like that. You are essentially crippling your whole argument by doing this. Your argument is no longer genuine because you are not being honest.

I came to assumption for three reasons.
1) You are irrationally opposing someone because of her standards. People are entitled to their standards. If my judgement of what would considered rational thought is obsolete to you, might I suggest you look at the up votes that she has received. Are a 24 people wrong whilst you stand conclusively correct? By the logic of probabilistic reasoning. Your opposition is to be deemed irrational.

2) You are contradicting your words as I've evidently displayed above.

3) Your questions are very naive which leads me to leave that you don't have too much experience with women. Hence, having issues with women, which you have so ever boldly declined.

[Chico_brah]

I think you are straying away from rational thought because you are correlating empathy to attraction standards. By no means is RJ expressing any lack of empathy by not being attracted to emotionally weaker men. If you are consistent with your logic, once again, you could sit there and say I have a lack of empathy for not being attracted dwarfish women who stand at 4'2 in height. We all have our standards and attraction is the result of biological wiring. Having explained rational thought to you... This further leads me to the assumption that no man who is not emotionally challenged and experiences trouble with women would carry the motive to make such an irrational opposition.

It is also irrational for that fact that you are attacking her on a personal level. The reason why you are doing this is because this is a personal issue for you. No? If not, please articulate as to why.

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah How is that contradictory? I'm not saying that I can relate to the struggle of emotionally challenged men (although I'm much more able to do so compared to her), I already stated that I'm a third party watching her (party 1) attack the emotionally challenged men (party 2). I didn't claim to know what it's like for them.

[Chico_brah]

"Hah! Nice try, average ass girl?"

___

Let me regurgitate the following.

"It is also irrational for that fact that you are attacking her on a personal level. The reason why you are doing this is because this is a personal issue for you. No? If not, please articulate as to why."

[Chico_brah]

@FroggyDoggy96 You don't have to directly claim that. It's evidently displayed throughout the entirety of this opinion of yours.

[Chico_brah]

" I am not an emotionally challenged man, nor do I necessarily have issues with women."

"it's clear that you are blinded to your advantages versus the emotional male, whom you cannot relate to on a level of struggle"

__

Those two are contradicting because in the first quote you are ever so boldly declining this. Yet in the second statement you are expressing your ability to relate to such a personal level. So by that logic, you're technically just as privileged as RJ.

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah Yeah it is nothing personal (if you are implying that I have a vengeance against girls of her kind or something, I just got a girls number today who falls into her category after all). I'm not attacking her, I haven't called her emotionally and mentally weak for having a bad day like she did to "some blubbering dudes". I simply stated something which is backed by decades of research, her privileges don't place her in the best position to ask certain things from these men. She has every right to, which is why it is her opinion after all. I'm just pointing out that it would mean more from a girl who is not so high up there on the privilege spectrum, because girls who were challenged more would be more able to empathize with the dudes she chose to "draw the line" on.

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah How exactly am I expressing my ability to relate to them? Because I said she can't? Dude, that's like saying that because I say she can't relate to Michael Jordans baskeball skills, I then must be able to relate to his skills. Stop defending her, it's a futile effort.

[Chico_brah]

"How exactly am I expressing my ability to relate to them?"

____

"I came to assumption for three reasons.
1) You are irrationally opposing someone because of her standards. People are entitled to their standards. If my judgement of what would considered rational thought is obsolete to you, might I suggest you look at the up votes that she has received. Are a 24 people wrong whilst you stand conclusively correct? By the logic of probabilistic reasoning. Your opposition is to be deemed irrational.

2) You are contradicting your words as I've evidently displayed above.

3) Your questions are very naive which leads me to leave that you don't have too much experience with women. Hence, having issues with women, which you have so ever boldly declined."

[Chico_brah]

Let's start by attacking number one yeah? Seem to be all over the place

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah Me opposing her opinion does not mean I am expressing my ability to relate to them, me contradicting myself really doesn't express my ability to relate to them, and me asking naive questions definitely doesn't express my ability to relate to them. Stop assuming bud. And lay off the roids, they are messing with your brain.

[Chico_brah]

Let's refrain from personal jabs. I know how you like these attacks since this is definitely not a personal matter to you.

I articulated as to why this is irrational and you haven't responded in any way shape or form in response to that point.

" me contradicting myself really doesn't express my ability to relate to them"

[Chico_brah]

As quoted again.
" I am not an emotionally challenged man, nor do I necessarily have issues with women."

"it's clear that you are blinded to your advantages versus the emotional male, whom you cannot relate to on a level of struggle"

You are actually directly contradicting yourself here. The first you are saying are boldly declining the fact that you fit that criteria. The second one you are expressing your ability to personally relate to that criteria. You did this irrationally for the fact that you took at jab at RJ's empathy to validate your point.

[Chico_brah]

I'm not just assuming either. There are 24 people who liked her opinion. You are opposing it to great lengths essentially saying that she posses to empathy due to that fact that we are biologically wired to attraction. Are you saying that you are absolutely correct while 24 people in opposition of you are wrong? By the logic of probabilistic reasoning, you are in fact, irrational in your stance. That is also tied along with all the other variables that you have displayed here. That's not me just pulling that out of my ass. It's evidently displayed. You can't just ride off everything with this notion of assuming when I'm literally solidifying everything that I'm saying to you with solid logic.

[Chico_brah]

You are again making personal jabs towards me, because this is a personal topic for you. If it wasn't personal to you, then you wouldn't be throwing personal jabs. Plain and simple. Now would you like to discuss any of these points that I've articulated to you or would you like to talk about steroids again? Because I really don't see how steroid use has any relevance in the conversation at all.

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah So if I say she can't play ball like MJ, that means that I have to be able to ball like MJ? Also, 24 people liking it doesn't mean shit. You're probably one of the people that liked her opinion, and you have shown to me that a like from you isn't worth much (considering your lack of ability to debate properly).

[FroggyDoggy96]

but before you try to sway from my question, tell me, do I need to play like MJ in order to state that she can't relate to MJ's balling level?

[Chico_brah]

https://i.imgur.com/HyAzQbW.jpg

Negative. As you can see, the same amount of votes are still displayed.

____

That analogy is in no way applicable. I'm not trying to negate your word as nothing because you actually had some opposition to articulate, then I'd follow up on that. I just don't see the relevance in regards to what has happened here. That's a very basic analogy that doesn't really add up to the variables. It almost sounds arbitrary lol. But again, you're more than welcome to elaborate on that analogy. I'd be happy to counter it.

If I'm getting at this correctly. You are not including the variables of you evidently be deceitful at all. Even if it's still a question of if you are being deceitful, that analogy is still not applicable to the context surrounding.

Again, by the logic of probabilistic reasoning. You the irrational one. You can't just discredit 24 downvotes as nothing for your convenience.

[Chico_brah]

Someone who actually stood at where you say you are standing would have no motive to go ahead and tell me.

"just got a girls number today who falls into her category after all)"

Just throwing that out there. I think you are full of shit tbh. That's not me going on a hunch. That's me logically assesses this whole conversation and coming to that conclusion. If I am wrong, please inform me as to why.

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah Actually, yes I can. Take for example religion (the majority of people in this world are religious), but scientifically, logically, and evidently, agnostics or atheists are more sensible. So it doesn't matter if she has 24 people supporting her, at least not to me.

I'm through with you. You accused me of contradicting myself based on your own faulty assumption (please look up the definition of assumption). My two statements which you quoted do not contradict, unless you add your own assumption into the equation, and your assumption does not reflect the facts.

[Chico_brah]

@FroggyDoggy96 My own assumption is based off of evidence that you have displayed here. Again, by the logical of probabilistic reasoning. This is not absolute by any means. Well, if we compare the following to a correlation coefficient (the logical world of statistics) the cumulative result will always be led in one direction or another based on the probabilistic reasoning. By this logic, it would confirm what I am saying is indeed factual. Subsiding from that, you can deem it as factual or nonfactual for that is entirely dependent upon your own discretion.

I'm sorry to tell you that religion is not applicable either, for region has nothing to do with an opinion website for dating. I can articulate as to why furthermore if you'd like me to. You stated that you are finished here though and my intent is not to embarrass you by any means. If you are finished, then you are finished.

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah If only she were still commenting so I could actually debate with someone who was at least a bit worth it.

[Chico_brah]

Why am I not worth a debate? You keep saying that I don't know how to but you haven't offered me much of a response. We can restart of the three points that I initial brought to your attention in which you could never fully addressed if you like. I might be able to prove myself to you at that point. You want to give it a shot?

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah No. I applaud your effort but I don't believe you are worth it (nor do I have the time or energy to break down why, I would recommend reading through our dialogue though if you would like to find out why), I have given you enough responses even though I was only intending on discrediting her. Good hustle, but let's move on.

[Chico_brah]

Ahhh. Maybe I'll lay off the steroids, they seem to be effecting my brain and making me too stupid to keep up with the your caliber of your unequivocal wit. Might I prove my worth to you in the future bud. Have a great night.

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah lol, if you're gonna try to make me feel bad, at least fix your grammar. It's terrible, no offense lol.

[Chico_brah]

@FroggyDoggy96 Duly noted.
https://i.imgur.com/TIJvKMf.jpg

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Chico_brah LOL. You made my night.

[Blueeyes2016]

Man, this went on and on and on lol. She said it best, balance is key

[Asker]

RJ, but is it okay to be down once in a while? A little bit of mental and emotional weakness at times... ?

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Blueeyes2016 The way you act emotionally is not only a reflection of your self control, but your genetics as well. This is what RJGraveyTrain fails to realize. That's why calling men weak for that is incorrect.

[Blueeyes2016]

@FroggyDoggy96 I am just how i am not really nothing anyone could change

[FroggyDoggy96]

@Blueeyes2016 Right! That's exactly why I called out RJGraveyTrain for bashing men who are not the strongest emotionally, it's how they are and they can't change that.

[Dog19]

What would you do if your boyfriend cried because you gave him a orgasm?

[traveler68]

That's not usually how it works but keep doing whatever it is you're doing.

[miawallacee]

Honestly just be yourself and don't surpress your feelings to please a girl. Why is it okay for a girl to be sensitive and, at times, overly emotional yet when a guy stops bottling up he's labeled "pathetic"? Sensitivity isn't gender related, it's a personality trait. It's so much more attractive when a man isn't concerned with "being a man." If a girl cares for you she isn't going to judge you for opening up so I guess all those girls that worry about the lack of mystery, if you do decide to open up, are the ones you should let loose

[Asker]

I hope I can find a girl like that, most girls, people I should say... I can't open up to, it hurts when friends call me too emotional or pathetic... They are super close friends too...

It feels like I just have to bottle everything up and "man up" just to be attractive.

[Dog19]

Girls don't like sensitive guys, I do but most women have unrealistic standards for a man

[Asker]

That sucks, what's a normal guy to do?

[FusionGuy]

I blame Disney!

[Mr-Kabuki]

I'll tell you something right hear about being sensitive. Girls dont want to date robots and they dont want to dont guys who can't control their emotions. women are attracted to masculinity, and that is just true. However, having the ability to let go and show an emotional side only for her is something that girls want, and it shows you are a well balanced and authentic male. Authenticity is a part of masculinity. However, you need the ratio. for example 80/20. look at a yin yang a think of masculinity and femininity like that. they are complimentary of one another and each male and female a little bit of the opposite in them. You need to learn to become a well balanced male and thats what going to attract women. How to do this? Well clearly, you have mastered the softer sides of strength and youve learned to be empathetic and compassionate. Good, since some guys are too hard and stiff to feel what you feel. but dont get too cocky, if you find it harder to toughen up, rather than soften down, then you obviously need to work on that. you need to develop your harder more masculine strengths and you need own your masculinity. Dont let the world own you and tell you your masculinity is toxic because it is not. there is a war on men, but you need to resist. Focus on character traits such as Courage, Discipline, Self reliance, time management, assertiveness, and you will learn to become more balanced. hope i gave you some insight.

[MazeOfLove]

I will respond from my relationship coaching lens: There is a phrase that nice guys finish last and I do not agree with it. Timid guys finish last--and there is a difference. Timid guys are a turn off to women because timid guys lack confidence and that lack of confidence effects how they communicate. In this, I have known plenty of men (clients, friends, family) who saw themselves as being emotionally available but the means by which they communicated put on an air of doubt and insecurity. I don't know your personal stories and do not want to judge you as timid, you may not be--but in my professional opinion, most men that feel as though they get flac for being too emotional demonstrate timid tendencies.

[AniaAnia]

In my personal opinion, it really much depends on the way they open it. The society has taught us that women are vulnerable and guys should be tough and no matter how much we try to break that pattern or want something different it is everywhere around us. I do like emotional guys, but I don't like the self pity and the over sharing some emotional people have it inside, mostly because I do not know how to handle i. It may be wrong, but I always tried to stay far from this kind of guys when being in a relationship, because for me it kills the vibe. As for having emotional male friends, I have them and I respect them and I never considered them as weak. You may call it double standards but I guess that is just me.

[AriadneSky]

how did society teach that women are vulnerable? what does that refer to?

[Chico_brah]

Very rarely will a chick want a man more emotional than her. Emotional guys tend to get trampled on in general. As a man, you should have control over your emotions and should never cross the line of what would be considered sensitive. Women can preach how they want a nice sensitive guy all day, but there is a reason why those same women are always single and/or dating the guy in opposition to that. They aren't actually attracted to those types of guys.

I was scoring the most pussy when I was less available with my emotions. It created more mystery. I've always struggled with intimacy. I hate cuddling.. holding hands.. I hate all of that stuff. It worked to my benefit when I was having casual sex though. That within itself has to say something.

Luckily I found a girl in whom I can connect with and actually understands how that I do have have emotions but express it in a different way. She was patient in figuring me out.

[ak666]

The way I see it, the way people define "emotional" and "unemotional" is screwed up. A definition of "unemotional" that implies unfeeling (robotic) is humanly unattainable, and we come back to sayings like, "Courage is not the absence of fear [...]"

More practical definitions to me are:

Emotional: Acting before thinking.
Unemotional: Thinking before acting.

By these definitions, being overtly "emotional" is always negative, always weak, and the sign of someone who is very emotional is one who constantly does things he/she immediately regrets. Such a person never uses his/her brain.

And likewise, being "unemotional" is actually one of the greatest things to strive towards -- for both men and women alike. The sign of unemotional to me is someone who is generally very calm and controls themselves in all kinds of situation (in spite of being in danger and feeling fear, in spite of feeling anger, in spite of feeling sadness). This tends to lead to better outcomes for everyone involved.

[ak666]

In this sense, a very emotional soldier might panic and run directly into the enemy's line of fire, immediately getting himself shot and immediately regretting his actions. A very emotional lover might have a quarrel and punch the one he/she loves, immediately regretting his/her actions. A very emotional person just acts impulsively all the time without thinking. It's never a good quality in either a male or female.

A calm soldier would think and use that brain even under enemy fire. A calm lover would think and use that brain even when he/she is furious at his/her lover. A calm, controlled mind is the opposite of a very emotional one. It always stops and thinks before acting.

In this sense, being unemotional and calm, controlled, self-disciplined is always a strength in both males and females.

[Chico_brah]

@ak666

"Emotional: Acting before thinking.
Unemotional: Thinking before acting."

These actually seem like they should be reversed. Emotionally overt people tend to think all too often before acting. They are often apprehensive to make decisions because they are in the mindset in polar opposition of logic. With logic based thinkers, they are able to assess situations for they are without second guessing themselves. Why? Logic is absolute. Logic is basic. With the person who thinks with logic, decision making becomes inherent, rather to be described as natural.

[Chico_brah]

Consider the following as an analogy. When you go to the doctors for your annual physical, they want to test your nerve reaction by striking a rubber type mallet on your knee. Now, that quick tap should quickly fire your nuerouscular system, causing a rapid stretch of those adjacent muscles and triggering nerve receptors in the tendons if you hit the right spot. This kicks off a eyeblink-fast nerve impulse transmission up your spinal cord, where it should trigger a reaction to contract the muscle that was just stretched.

Now consider that idea in reference to the idea that logic based thinkers are hitting the nerve and fully erecting their leg up upon every strike. It's a reaction that you don't think about. It's a reaction that your body naturally does with absolutely no thought process. Again, logic is absolute.

[Chico_brah]

Emotional thinkers tend to accumulate a lens of what would be considered "abstract" or "theoretical" behind every decision they make. Emotion is complex. It is not absolute like logic. Emotion fluctuates. Since emotion fluctuates in accordance to many variables throughout the day, this causes an interference. It is in human nature to be reactive to your enviroment. Emotional thinkers tend to not make as many quality decisions in comparison to the logic based thinker. As a response to this, they will in time start to second guess themselves. This causes anxiety when making decisions. This is why emotional minds tend to overthink the most simple of decisions.

[Chico_brah]

I think balance as @RJgraveytrain was describing is key. As someone who has a very logical mind, I can personally attest that there are pros and cons. As a logic based thinker, it's sometimes hard to form intimate relationships in accordance to how others do so in a sort sequent manner. You can sometimes only reciprocate so far some times.

[Chico_brah]

I'm extroverted by nature. I have no issues making friends and I think I have above average social skills. Having said that, It was always hard for me to connect to someone on what I like to call on a 'real level' in regards to dating. I've gotten much better throughout the years. I'm attentive and have the ability to be genuinely interested in other peoples lives. It took effort to get to the point in where I'm at today though. Luckily I found a girl that understand my mind operates in this way. All of my relationships prior have been in a routine of women saying that I'm an asshole and just don't care. You have to recognize why that is a struggle within itself.

[Chico_brah]

This is why casual sex worked for me. Not everyone is cut out for casual sex. In my mind, I was getting what I wanted. I felt good when having sex and that's all that mattered to me. I wasn't longing for a relationship by any means but I still did notice that I had a hard time reciprocating feelings and emotions that women would frequently throw at me. If I could be a bit more emotional, then I honestly would. I still till this day think that my logic overpowers my emotion. It's beneficial, but also comes with its negatives as well. By no means is emotion weak as entirety.

I think you're glamorizing this because it's something that you don't have. It's easy to do that from the other side and completely in human nature. I'm not sure if you're up to reading this but this was a solid theory with logic surrounding it as to why humans in general do these types of things. It's an old one for sure. It's a good read though.

www.communicationcache.com/.../...l_attributes.pdf

[ak666]

@Chico_Brah Very interesting response! In my case, my internal enemy was always anger when I was younger. I was prone to get pissed off easily all the time.

My simplistic definitions above are formulated based on when I realized that I was prone, during intense moments of anger, to act without thinking. It almost immediately lead to a regrettable outcome, yet I used to think it was impossible to overcome that anger.

I started to develop this self-consciousness during those moments when I was feeling angry to the point where I could calm myself down and just ask, "Is what I want to do next going to make things better?" The answer was almost always "no" -- my natural inclination was to pick fights and escalate them needlessly.

Just becoming aware of myself in this sense started to allow me to overcome that anger, to learn how to think before I acted.

[ak666]

>> Emotionally overt people tend to think all too often before acting. They are often apprehensive to make decisions because they are in the mindset in polar opposition of logic. With logic based thinkers, they are able to assess situations for they are without second guessing themselves.

Those definitions might be a tad simplistic. They're useful to me in contexts where people are driven by emotional impulses that repeatedly lead to negative outcomes.

Since I see emotions as ultimately a motivator of all human behavior, to strive to keep them in check is not striving to eliminate them as I see it. It's striving, for example, to utilize them in productive ways.

Overthinking itself could be a symptom of emotions going out of control since, as you said, logic is absolute. Typically a productive being would exercise the appropriate level of thought before taking an action, and guided more by logic than by what they're feeling in the moment.

I don't see it as black and white [...]

[ak666]

[...] but rather a complex spectrum. Where I think the idea of emotional control and self-discipline becomes most helpful is for those who constantly feel that their emotions are getting the better of them, of losing self-control.

Even very sensitive people, prone to take quick offense, are generally failing to exercise rational thought. They may, for example, take offense at something which wasn't even intended to offend without seeking any clarification of intent.

I glamorize this type of state of being "unemotional" since I equate it with self-discipline -- not to lose the emotions but to be able to learn how to resist letting them get the better of people.

Gender studies courses lumps the idea as being a part of "toxic masculinity", and the way I perceive it is far from "toxic". It's a virtue I see worth striving towards.

[ak666]

>> Having said that, It was always hard for me to connect to someone on what I like to call on a 'real level' in regards to dating. I've gotten much better throughout the years. I'm attentive and have the ability to be genuinely interested in other peoples lives. It took effort to get to the point in where I'm at today though.

The fact that you're making this effort is something I don't consider "emotionally" driven but rationally, because that self-evaluation and improvement came from a determination, I assume, that this will improve your relationships.

What I consider more in the realm of emotional behavior in this context is if a guy just keeps doing what he's doing even if he's driving everyone away without stopping and thinking if what he's doing is actually getting him what he wants.

I actually don't think your struggle to become more empathetic is the result of you becoming more emotionally-driven... but rather something thought out to achieve a better outcome.

[ak666]

Just the word "emotion" is heavy and triggers subjective ideas, but the dichotomy I see is more between:

1. self-disciplined vs. impulsive
2. in control vs. out of control
3. self-aware vs. oblivious
4. thick-skinned vs. hyper-sensitive
5. productive vs. counter-productive

... things along these lines. I think it's dangerous to promote "emotional" people because too often it may be interpreted in ways that lead to the latter cases in all four points above, and I see them all as negative qualities.

[ak666]

Emotional guys tend to be toxic. If you go around punching people or things when you're angry or even killing people when you're really angry, crying every single time you're slightly upset, developing all kinds of trust issues from the mildest suspicions, exhibit jealousy all the time, become controlling, etc. -- that's generally not going to be unattractive to girls.

Even in the rare case that it is attractive and the girl becomes addicted to a very emotional and abusive and controlling guy, it's generally better to learn how to control those emotions and become a calm being who learns self-discipline and stoicism.

[ak666]

[...] that's generally not going to be unattractive [/appealing] to girls.

[ak666]

A very emotional guy, for example, might shut a girl out and not talk to her, scream at her, or even punch her when angry.

The opposite of this is a calm being. Even if he's just as angry at the girl as the emotional guy, he does not scream at her, does not shut her out, does not punch her. Instead he remains calm, uses his brain, and asks, "What should I do in this situation for the best result?"

... at which point he might hug the girl, make a joke, gently talk and express his feelings. That's what you want to strive to do if you are a very emotional guy.

[ak666]

Emotional guys don't like to use their brains, so to speak... they just act impulsively on their emotions, and that will repeatedly lead to regrettable outcomes that make everything worse. Using the brain is the opposite of being an emotional person, and a person who uses his brain will generally avoid regrettable actions -- he'll often find ways to avoid conflicts, deescalate them, improve relationships rather than damage them further, etc.

[ak666]

>> However, when a guy does decide to open up, girls (and his peers) think he is too emotional, pathetic, and there is no mystery or attraction.

Opening up and expressing your feelings isn't necessarily an indication of an emotional person. An emotional person is someone who is out of control. They can't use their brain.

An example of an emotional person is someone who runs around panicking and screaming like a headless chicken when their house is on fire. An example of a calm, level-headed person (the opposite of an emotional one, even though he/she feels the same feelings) is someone who, in the presence of a fire, avoids acting on their fear/panic and calmly locates an exit.

A person who is not emotional is always calm and always strategic, always using that brain to decide what the best thing is to do in a given situation.

Now a calm and strategic person wouldn't necessarily open up their feelings to people just because they felt like it. They'd do it to resolve a conflict, e. g

[AnaWryneck]

Okay so.. I believe my man should be able to discuss his feelings with out being judged and if he is hurt he should be able to cry and what ever it is as long as he isn't hurting himself or anyone else.. BUT there's levels to this shit I'm sure guys wouldn't want to date a woman whose always sad or crying or feeling hurt over the Little things women don't want it either the reason we want you to open up is because you're probably closed off it's like a door to a house and all the emotions live in this house you shouldn't leave your house door always open only when something is coming and going and that's Men and women

[UnknownXYZ]

www.court-records.net/.../miles-crossed(c).gif

Everything is in balance. The problem is that it is very hard for a man to be openly emotional without coming across as "pathetic".

I am a very emotional person and it is very apparent that you are ridiculed for being emotional if you are a man. That's why I bury around 85% of it inside me.

Either way, women like men who have a good mix of traits. Being emotional suggests there's an imbalance of traits.

www.court-records.net/.../miles-smirk(c).gif

Just thought I would throw that one in there.

[CaSSieLJ]

Opening up means that he trusts me and thinks me as a close, intimate person. But if he's not my boyfriend, I would be quite surprised and disgusted if he's being emotional. As for me, I rather want an emotionally-intelligent guy. I'm not an expressive person, and I would love it if he asks me what's wrong when seeing me unhappy rather than me complaining. But again, even when he's opening himself up, I still think that we should have some sort of distance (we are still 2 independent individuals) and that too much complaining just ruins my day.

[Kreneman]

From man to man, women are emotional human beings. Plus there Soft, Naturing, and they are natural fical. They have always say things like that especially when they say we don't give them affection or listen to them. When it comes to emotion, Timing is key, be very mature, respectful, strong, and serious in a smooth way when your talking. Don't give out to much information (Especially towards friends that are not your level) unless that woman is mature, trusting, caring, and a good listener (which all equals to balance).

[Anonymous]

I hate the over dramatics and having to walk on eggshells around someone who can be upset by the silliest little things. I hate having to fluff a sensitive ego. I think it really depends. If you're more sensitive you have to remember to forgive and forget. You have to be able to be strong during tuff times and know when it's your turn to hold yourself together for someone else. You need to know when it's the right time to open up and allow someone to see your sensitive side. It's all about balance. I think women want someone who's not going to be petty and upset by the small things, but sensitive in the sense that they allow themselves to express the positive emotions more and are not afraid to show their love.

[Blueeyes2016]

Where have you been

[Anonymous]

I can't speak for all women.
I don't want a man who is as emotional as me, for whatever reason, I would find that unappealing and even unattractive.
But I don't want a guy who is emotionally stunted either. That would cause problems in any relationship.

So I guess a guy who is a bit less emotional than me would be my best choice. I guess that would be difficult to measure though.
Sometimes when I feel particularly emotional or if I'm very upset or crying about something, it's nice to have a guy to lean onto. Their ability to be less emotional with certain things is sometimes endearing. And helpful.
I know most feminists would torch me for that, but as I said I can only speak for myself.
Those are my thoughts.

[Anonymous]

1. Looks (Height, Face)
2. Money
3. Social Status (Popularity/Job Status)

These are the 3 things women care about the most. Everything else is just BS and women can live without their man having it. This i what being an emotional guy gets you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVmCwmC5-kQ

[If she doesn't leave you, she will be getting side dick by a real Alpha. Women despite what they say lose respect for men when they show emotions.]

[JamesCX]

Let's get something straight... every individual person is looking for something different! Ofc you can put up some tag's, for ex. vain guys like vain boys or nerds like the looks of the prom queen but, at the end of the day, up other nerds, etc. Bottom line, you'll have tons of opinions... but none of them will answer YOUR question... since they are the express individual opinion of each one of them... sorry brother. Take a big hug from me instead!

[laurapalmer]

I want someone who is emotional but not someone who is a drama queen. It's very reassuring when you're with a guy who is capable of being emotional. When my boyfriend and I started talking again after a difficult few months apart, there was one night he was over at my house and we were talking and I started crying a little bit and I felt like an idiot, but he started crying a little bit too. He was super embarrassed but I don't know I guess it validated that we were both feeling the same way.

[nevermoregirl7]

No, I wouldn't blame a guy for opening up. I think for me, what bugs me is explosive behavior. My boyfriend is really horrible about that. If one thing does not go his way, he is just in a foul mood. Which contradicts me because I am so passive and c'est la vie about everything.

[KINGNIGGA123]

Like women?

[Comawhite666]

there is such a thing as too emotional, my ex is one of them. I like a guy who says what's bothering him, but when he works up emotions to such extremes it's really hard to deal with, especially when they can''t see reason and are so sensitive the slightest harsh tone to my voice upsets them >.<

[ThisDudeHere]

In my opinion it entirely depends on circumstance. You could express yourself word for word, action for action in exactly the same way in two or more different locations, places and times to different or even the same people and you would not get the same reaction. The solution to this issue is not "if" you should or shouldn't express yourself, but more like "when and how" you do it.
It all boils down to knowing the right time and place.

[orangemuffin]

What to do?
Get over it , accept yourself and find someone with mutual vibrations. But don't open up too fast, unless you feel like the person you're opening up to is worthwhile. But again, you can neverr know that for sure. Everytime you open up, you take a risk. Be careful

[JustAnHonestGuy]

Some people just don't understand men's emotions. We're taught since birth to bottle everything up, and that's what most of us do. So i think, when they meet one of us that aren't emotionally crippled this way, they don't understand how to handle it. I'm always open about my emotions, and aome like that, some don't. You just gotta find that one that knows what you have to offer and wants that. There's no reason to change who you are for someone else. There will be someone that thinks that you are exactly what they are looking for.

[Prettygurl12]

I want an emotionally intuitive guy. One who recognizes the correct time to display a certain emotion. He needs to know when the incorrect time to display an emotion as well. And he needs to recognize when I am displaying an emotion and have the correct emotional response to my emotion - whatever it is.

He doesn't need to wilt into a puddle every time a conflict comes up. But he does need to recognize the acceptable emotions to be displayed at any given time.