I really like her, but I struggle with my physical attraction to her. What should I do?

[wtf636]

I'm 35, I would like to start a family soon, and I have been dating trying to find a woman that I can build a life with. I would say I'm a catch, decent looking, 6 foot, great career. I am the type of man that a lot of women want to marry.

I had my heart broken about 2 years ago and I have had a hard time moving on since. I have had a couple of relationships since then, but I seem to have a weakness for very attractive women with bad attitudes.

With all that being said, about 3 months ago I met a woman, that isn't anything like the women I have dated before. She obviously really likes me basically and treats me how I have always wanted to be treated by a woman. Our dogs get along, we have a lot in common, and she is just easy to be with.

The problem, she is a bit overweight, and I struggle with being fully attracted to her. Everything else is good and I find myself feeling like a dick for thinking this. I like short Hispanic women with a pretty face, which she is, but he body type is not exactly my type. That's literally the only issue I have with her.

I am a pretty sexual person, but with her, I just don't have the desire to have sex all the time. I think she is attractive, and when she gets dressed up I can get into it. We have sex about 1-2 a week. But I just like hanging out with her so much, it's so comfortable it just doesn't seem important sometimes, and she doesn't seem to be bothered by it. But also isn't the type to say anything if she did feel something about it. I have feelings for her, but it's not the overwhelming lust (maybe love) I have felt with the girl that broke my heart.

I feel like this is the type of woman I need. I don't really think of it as settling, maybe just realizing I was chasing the wrong thing. But then the fact that I struggle with my attraction to her also seems like an issue. What should I do here? I feel like I could have a life with this woman if I could get past this issue in my head.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Well, I always say that looks fade, and they do. Good people stay good people, bad people stay bad people. Weight can be lost, ya know, it can become a hobby for you two to go to the gym and maybe you’ll have a stronger physical attraction after that?
You compared her to your ex, which isn’t good, but I get it… The thing is; you mentioned that she is different - Different from anyone you’ve ever dated and said that she is someone you might need. That is someone you want to keep.
I can’t decide for you or give you any further advice because this is something about your own feelings and I can’t change that.

[Anonymous]

I think you should find someone you're more physically attracted to. If you're saying "this is the woman I need, BUT" and you can't let it go. It's a lingering issue that is bothering you. Deep down you want to be more attracted to your partner, you just don't know if you're going to find all of the good in her in a more attractive partner. So you're swaying back and forth. You have to decide, can you be ok with her lack of attractiveness for another 5 years? 10? 15? 20?

[Anonymous]

My opinion is the same as the person below @whattheheckkkk. Maybe your ex was lust and this is what love not suppose to feel like. When you mention love about her and she’s different, well maybe that is what love suppose to be like because love isn’t supposed to hurt or make you feel this way. Love her just the way she is because weight can always be lost but love can be lost and never found again if you don’t try to see past what you are lusting for

[u7ey3y4yr]

Dont fornicate