I think my boyfriend has a crush on his coworker. They text each other. What to do?

Question

They text each other often. I overheard him telling his roommate that she told him about her workouts when she texted him. They are paired up together in their department and the boss calls them her minions. When he and I first started dating he dropped her to the airport for her flight. When I first met my boyfriend, he had a moustache like her boyfriend. The part that bothers me is that they text each other about their day. Her boyfriend is long distance and is in a different timezone. She's a pretty white girl like him. I'm Asian and not as pretty. He liked a couple of her pics on IG. I know he has a thing for white girls because he told me who he finds attractive on TV. I'm mainly hurt about them texting each other. Do I just let it go?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Sounds like they are just friends? Before you even? It's really hard to say if anything is going on or not. It could just be your insecurities/jealousy? Is it a bit unusual though, but doesn't mean they aren't just good friends either. And the fact that she has a boyfriend also, I would tend not to worry too much about it. And is it just texting? Do they ever meet up outside of work (I know about the drive to the airport, but like spending time together)? Maybe suggest a couple's night? You can not only meet her boyfriend (and her), but see how they are together? If there's no hesitation and they agree to it, you'll also know that they likely aren't hiding anything, but you'll also know that her boyfriend knows about them as well. You might even get a chance to talk to him about it and get his thoughts/feelings on them and their relationship. Might make you feel better about it?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

This is an emotional affair, disrespectful, crossing boundaries and an insult. If he wants to do all of that, he can remain single. Your mention of 'should I just let it go' suggests potential self esteem issues and a scarcity mindset. You are afraid of saying something because enforcing boundaries would mean ending it. Never put up with poor insulting treatment from anyone. One can voice their disappointment, but when you feel the need to instruct a partner on how they should be treating you, often it's too late...

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It sounds like they genuinely could be just friends but if you feel this way tell him how you feel girl! His reaction will tell you the answer you are waiting for. Boys and girls can be just friends but with a relationship comes boundaries- there isn't really a need for them to talk 24/7! I am sure you are stunning and he wouldn't be with you if he didn't think so either:)

My boyfriend has just distanced himself completely from a girl friend because it made me feel uncomfortable, that showed me that he wasn't interested in her like i was overthinking!!

IAmMichael · Answer

You're sounding pretty clingy to me, and perhaps a little lacking in self-confidence. Ask yourself this--if he is interested in another woman, why would he be with you? And why shouldn't he have a close friend he likes to talk to, regardless of her sex or ethnicity?

It sounds to me like this is just a friend of his. You should leave him alone about this and take some time to realize you are more important to him than some girl at work is ever likely to be.

Neosporin · Answer

Well it's hard to tell what is actually cheating and what is just your insecurity. He's texting her. Maybe they're just friends? Or maybe he likes her? So what either way? It seems to me the uncertainty is causing you more problems than the reality whatever it is.

I don't know what you look like but I'm sure you're just as attractive and desirable as that other girl whoever she is. Just want to give you some certainty and self confidence whatever the outcome is.

Anonymous · Answer

Kick his azz to the kurb in the most polite manner. He doesn’t deserve an explanation

LegendaryIcon · Answer

i think you should just leave well enough alone your jealousy is showing

awkward_author · Answer

If it bothers you this much, talk to him about it.

Anonymous · Answer

If you have a problem then break up 💔

I think my boyfriend has a crush on his coworker. They text each other. What to do?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

I think my boyfriend has a crush on his coworker. They text each other. What to do?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.