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It does cause analysis paralysis. But by opening up our communities, we have lowered our standards on human relationships. Now you can keep making new relationships while in one, and there is little stigma or consequence to keep people tied in relationships.
That said, some realtionships are toxic, but most just get boring. If you watch enough movies, this is not acceptable. You need to live in a constant flux of butterflies and sexual gratification. If you're not happy, you are not doing it right is the mantra these days.
Real love and meaningful relationships cannot endure that. It takes time and a lot of work. There is going to be a spectrum of pain and joy you will experience in a profound and meaningful relationship.
People sometimes find that, but it's getting rare because most people expect the next best thing to show up any moment, even while seeing others. And even more oddly, people give themselves freely these days just to see what they can snag. In short, a lot of miserable and lonely people who can have, but will avoid because they believe they somehow deserve more.
Rather than focus on assuming your partner will leave you, focus on making sure the person you pick is a good match... meaning for both of you, not just what you like. Too often, people assume anyone they're attracted to should be equally attracted to them. You want others to respect your preferences, so start by respecting theirs. Find someone who appreciates you as you are rather than for the potential you can become. Focus on being the best partner you can be (from your partner's perspective), and your partner will never even consider gambling and possibly losing you. Yes, there are many options out there, but I wouldn't give you 10¢ for the vast majority of them, as people tend to be too self-focused to be healthy partners. The biggest problem in dating is people focus primarily on what the other should provide rather than what they can do to add special meaning to the relationship.
I meeeeean
If you haven’t made it official with anyone then you’re technically not in the wrong to keep your options open. Its not searching for the next best thing. Its laying out all the options and seeing whats the best fit for you
Now if unofficial BUT you and that one person agreed to only continue getting to know eachother, then you’d be in the wrong for looking for still looking for greener. Its all about communication and whether or not boundaries are set
I think historically people were limited to a small local pool of potential partners and they just settled for one. Now with apps that pools become an ocean and you've got access to thousands over a greater distance, people that once you'd never meet.
Opinion
25Opinion
Too many options is basically saying back in the day it was better because we had less to choose from. We can't stop technology, however it does appear that more choices tend to hinder our decision making. If we don't like one person just ghost them and choose another and another and the cycle continues. Back in the day we had to be more understanding and patient because it might be awhile before we met someone else.
There are seemingly too many options which is the trap of all traps. And the ease in which multiple superficial but borderline cheating contacts can be made is mind-boggling. I am not, personally, a fan of the constant technological bombardments. Guess this is evident with 0 following/followers.
When I was dating, after the initial talking stage, I told those I dated: "This is my plan".
*First we will go to church together...
*Then, blah blah blah, through some local travel, meeting family through sexual intimacy until I got to wedding bells. It was not a proposal, it was a plan of action. If they thought it was plausible, they would accept the next step. If not, they would decline and that was it. It was laborious, but I dealt with one "option" at a time. In time I reached wedding bells. She never had any doubt about what I had in mind and I did exactly what I said I'd do.
too many options one is more subjective than most realize because on paper most have a lot of options compared to the reality that most actually have very few actual options tyanks to the further inflated levels of being superficial in people as a whole coupled with the eliminators such as prefferences of both parties needinging yo match as well as the availability of those who fullfill a large enough pirtion of prefferences. as well it is an equal problem with many other problems which could mean the "biggest problem" mite be there are too many problems.
Nope I disagree, I think the biggest problem is that a lot of people date cause they don't wanna be alone or get anything else out of you and not for love itself and for finding a true partner and that makes it harder finding someone who do truly mean it and fits to you personally.
But if you stick to your standards and don't put up with bullshit and keep searching, I believe you will be successful one day
u I think it is a big problem, but not the biggest problem.
Between all the depression and anxiety that so many people are suffering from, pornography, polarization, social media, smartphones, general immaturity, and a host of other issues that I'm sure I've forgotten to list, I think it's pretty hard to pinpoint what the biggest problem in dating is.
too many options.
do I focus on my partner or me?
I don't know, so much to choose from…🤔.
now, I’m being facetious, I know. I’m not poking fun at you, I just disagree with the whole premise of dating. Strangers meeting strangers and lying or being disingenuous about who they are and basically challenging the other person to figure it out.
i think dating IS the problem. You shouldn’t go out with someone until you already know them.
that's a reason and there's some studies to back up in general, the issue of having too many options. but when I was in a classroom with girls and few girls around, I still din't pick one nor they me. there's more to it.
Maybe…
Because in the past when there were just 1000 people it was much easier to find love of your life.
The issue is hypergamy. Women earn more than men now. They dont need a protector/provider. All they need is penis. And the penis they want has no reason to commit.
Been married a long time, firstly. But I don’t think “options” are the issue, it only feels like the issue. We have become more objectifying and more quick to swipe left or whatever based on arbitrary BS.
u I never had problems with dating...
maybe because I really didn't need options
It's not that people have too many options, it's that they THINK they have way more options than they actually do.
C
98% of those options aren't even worth a second look.
Not for me lol. But for women it does seem to be a problem.
The problem with modern dating is it going to social media. People are picking and choosing guys or girls like shopping at amazon. Its pretty disgusting.
for women yes but for men its a different world. You girls dont even appreciate that you do.
Too many options can't be a bad thing. If anything, it makes it easier to find what you want. Options are a good problem to have.
I believe modern dating is exposed to a lot of dating or new cultures that are negative to relationships
*Correction*
The biggest problem in modern dating is too many options FOR WOMEN.
Men are the ones who approach women, but its almost never the other way around.
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