Guys, is it a turn off if a woman wants to take care of you?

Question

Someone who acts like a wife, girlfriend, friend, motherly to you because she cares? I read somewhere here that is a serious turn off. Example: she reminds you to put on some SPF or take your vitamins, etc
What kind of woman do you want to be with? Why?

glennos89 · Accepted Answer

No I love it if a woman wants to take care of the mess I'm getting myself into actually.

It's actually the most beautiful thing she can offer to me. Nothing can beat a caring loving woman who helps you to get through all the bullshit you have to go being a guy.

Nothing can beat a supportive woman on your side from a guy's perspective. That's why we love woman so much and couldn't live without them. I would kill myself today of all the woman would disappear on this earth to be honest. I wouldn't wanne live in a world with only dudes

Woman are amazing ( at least the ones that are caring and loving )

I'm NOT talking about the woman who are digging for gold and personal gain only when I say that. Because those woman we dont want or need!!!

But the good woman out there... Nothing but love for them ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

ARWINGx1 · Accepted Answer

To be honest, because I'am autistic, (or more specifically, have Asperger's) I feel that having such a girlfriend can have a big (positive) impact. ... At least on my end.

caring__1 · Answer

Some guys want a mommy; I prefer a partner. I appreciate a caring partner, but needing to be needed will smother a relationship. Rescuing is saying the other person is too stupid to know what to do. This only nurtures dependency. Dependency and feelings of inadequacy go hand in hand. As one increases, so does the other. People have enough insecurities without more being nurtured by a woman who needs to mommy her partner. It feels a lot better when a partner shows he/she believes in his/her partner rather than believing that person can't function without the mommy.

AmandaYVR · Answer

My husband has told me that women being caring, empathetic, sensitive to their men is pretty much the biggest draw in whom they choose to be their wife. She gets upped from just girlfriend material. (I had no idea he felt this way when I met him.)

OlderAndWiser · Answer

I don't want a woman who tries to dictate what I should do, but I am good with her making suggestions.  Q. Do I want a woman who shows that she cares? A. Is the Pope Catholic?

AviatorTom · Answer

That's just fine with me.

ZXCwWRQWz · Answer

I love when my wife does when I'm injured or sick as long as it's not overbearing.

Actually that's one of the reasons I decided to marry her. A few months into dating her, my friends threw me a birthday party and I got so drunk. I did at least tell them I had too much but they were like, "Drink, drink, drink! Happy Birthday!"

Then I got so drunk that I couldn't even walk. I was like a corpse. So my wife (she was only my girlfriend of a few months at the time) dragged me across the street while I was barely conscious, stuffed me into a taxi, took me back to her place, paid for taxi, found two big random strangers to help her carry me back into her apartment, then went shopping for hangover medicine.

When I woke up with one of the worst hangovers I ever had in my life, she had everything all prepared for me in a grocery bag: every single type of hangover food and cure you can imagine. And that's when I knew this is the woman I need to marry; I never found a woman looking after me this way and especially when I fucked up.

Leapfrog00 · Answer

My ex girlfriend Destiny was like that. Always caring, and always looked out for me. I used to think it was a little smothering, but I still showed her my appreciation. Now, I wish I would have known she was really just looking out for me, because of all my PTSD, I have trust issues with everybody and think there's always some catch.

Since I got ill last year and I almost died, now I wish i had someone like that around, to remind me to take my 25 medications, to make sure I'm eating because my blood sugar gets too low, to make sure I get to my doctor's appointments. But no, I don't find it a turn off. It's a lonely world and we all need someone to care for us.

My days are done, and I'll most likely never meet anyone ever again, but for other people, I think it's important.

If I had a nice girl to look out for me, maybe I wouldn't have waited 3 weeks to go to the hospital when I ended up with diabetes. Now my vision is all messed up, my memory is all shot, my blood sugar is all over the place, and I'm always tired.

I think any guy who has someone that does nice things for him should appreciate what they have, and should not take advantage of her, but the nice things she's doing for him.

dynamicyandere · Answer

It really depends on how it’s done.

It’s one of those things where it’s like it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.

I 100% believe that having a woman want to take care of you is endearing and attractive.

But, of course, delivery is important.

In terms of energy…

Submissive & Supportive > Confrontational & Controlling

I know that sounds like 2 extremes, but you want to be on the supportive side of the spectrum. 🙂

(Of course, the caveat here is this doesn’t apply to guys that LIKE to be dominated, but that’s not most guys.)

hahahmm · Answer

I may not be able to really answer this question because I was never a guy who had women coming to him offering to "take care" of me. Nor did I ever want that. But one phase I went through was going overboard giving things to women for little in return. When I was in that phase I thought it would be great if a woman did the same to me. Later when I learned to be smarter about what I gave, I switched my feeling of needing stuff to just having boundaries/expectations that make a relationship fair. I didn't really need a woman but having a woman was a luxury/choice. And I didn't expect things to ever be equal. Just a deal both sides agreed to.

When a guy has the things a woman wants & she see's he is valuable in a serious way/lifelong relationship way, she is suddenly seeing the importance of proving her own value to him. But, both genders need to have some boundaries. We can't and shouldn't be doing everything for another person. Unless that person is bed ridden.

NamerOfStars · Answer

It's all in how it's done. A man likes to feel cared about; he hates to be nagged. He likes to feel that his needs and desires are considered; he hates to feel babied. The key is to come across as supportive, rather than controlling; a loyal and helpful partner, instead of a substitute mom.

Society demands a lot of men, especially in terms of leadership and authority, and while you may want him to feel he can relax and doesn't have to be "on" all the time, it takes a LOT for a typical guy to think you really mean that.

TheUniqueOne96 · Answer

No, I'd love that, as I think it'd be her way of showing love.

I definitely think I'd be attracted to women who I think are into me in the first place.

As long as she doesn't do every, little thing for me to the point where I don't bother doing anything myself and become totally reliant on her, then it's fine, because I do want to be self-sufficient.

Losalt · Answer

In moderation it's definitely a positive.
However I don't want my girlfriend to be my "mother".
And if you're so much into taking care of people that it's getting excessive then that's more suitable for people who actually got that kink...

Lionman95 · Answer

Depending on the level of how much she does. I would say in terms doing something good for me from time to time feels great but I would say speaking for most men we don´t want a second mom. The issue with that is that we still like to be free in a way and a guy that is taken care of too much by his girlfriend gets lazy and loses his ambitions and starts to take a woman for granted. It also makes a guy feel less of a man since he gets the feeling that she might not take him seriously.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

It's a balancing act. You don't want to mother me. I don't want to stick my junk in my mother. If you bring me my pills while I'm doing something and are like "hey baby it's time for your meds" that wouldn't bother me. If every time I left the house you were like "Make sure you put on sunscreen" it comes off as "look both ways before crossing the street" or "make sure you don't talk to strangers"

GreatBigCircles · Answer

It's really a matter of extremes. Someone that acts like a helicopter mom looking after their children is a definite turn off. Someone that makes you feel like they don't think you're competent as a human being is a turn off. Someone who just likes to remind you about stuff sometimes because she knows you forget or notices you missed something is not. Nor is someone who legitimately cares about your emotional and mental well being and asks about it (with the intent to actually listen).

slatyb · Answer

That depends a lot on what she means by "take care of". My wife takes care of a lot because she's doesn't have an outside job. If she did, then we would split that work. I feel cared for, but she's not motherly. She feels the same, and I don't parent her either.

mattclark242 · Answer

well it ok bit I do not want a mom. it ok to care but if you act to much like a mom it not a turn off It just make me feel like I am being lazy or I need grow up more.

My dad away have mom bring him drinks and sometime I feel like I do not want this I do not want a women to sever me. My mom sometime hate this.

it ok girls like men the bring them coffee in the morning

JSmuve · Answer

Definitely not a turn off. It's a turn on. I've always been drawn towards those women. I don't know what it is about them. But if she's controlling and demanding, it ceases to be "feeling taken care of".

RingOfFire · Answer

I like that she is concerned for me and cares for me. But it is a matter of the extent of her actions. I don't want her to constantly be treating me like a child or nagging me. But it is not a turn off at all if she reasonably reminds me about things that shows me she is concerned and caring... especially if I see that it is coming from here heart. That is a turn ON not off.

KlinkyCoder · Answer

It depends on what she does, like if she did things like remind me to put on SPF I would view that as her thinking I was still 12. But I do like female heroines, so I'm alright and good with that. Not that I'm a weak person myself, I can be strong and protective of a woman but there is still something about a strong protective woman to me.

DextroShade · Answer

In what wretched, evil place did you read that was a turn off? Most men would kill to have a woman that cares about them that much! My wife does all of that for me and I love her for it!

JesseP1nk · Answer

Oh fuck. Thats bit too much for me. I want a partner - not a mother. I make my own lunch for work or go out to eat, if she thinks i forget to buy something, then remember me by texting or calling.

I wanna feel like man around my woman, not like her son. Or maybe im weird 🤣

MrPickles13 · Answer

I think it depends to be extent they do jr. If it's little things hear and there but more when your having a bad day or not well then I'd say that it's a really good and beneficial thing. I think if it was constant reminders/leading towards nagging then j think it would be. A bit on the irritating side but also maybe like your being parented.

Personally I think that it's a bit of a fine line between a really nice and lovely thing to being to much.

Lynx122 · Answer

No I think that's very attractive my girlfriend is like that and I really appreciate that she cares about me like that :) She's always concerned about my wellbeing and happy when things are going well for me :) I love that :)

WanderingLoveWizard · Answer

It is for me. Same as when they talk to me like they're teaching me something.
I've been to hell and back... twice, I don't need some girl taking care of me or trying to teach me about life. She's preaching to the choir

ObscuredBeyond · Answer

It's about strategy. Instead of: "Don't forget to put sunblock on," say: "I've got some sunblock right here." It shows you're an ally, but that you're not trying to replace his mother.

RavVid · Answer

After puberty no male animal wants to be mom'ed. But it is how girls act when they care. It becomes annoying if overdone or done in an instructing way as though you are a child. That is just way over

MementoMori777 · Answer

anything that comes from care i can't stay mad at, im not insecure to really care about petty things in life

NathanDavis · Answer

case by case scenario... always loved someone truly caring yes... but, I don't want to be treated like a baby or a toddler... lol not even my own mother did that, lmao

Belgie · Answer

Within limits. Less mothering. Trust me to do things. Listen when I tell you you're nagging ir telling me stuff I already know (that's insulting).

Jonnyanalog · Answer

Depends on the delivery. If she is disrespectful/nagging as in ‘you need to do x-thing this way…” then it’s degrading and annoying.
If it’s out of kindness and respect then I’m good with it.

strateguy632 · Answer

reminder , feels bossy , so that help is a turn off. but bring me the beer , when not expected, that take care is great

molonski2 · Answer

Hell NO !! I wouldn't have a problem with any of that , shows she cares and is thinking of whats best.

mobiusforniner · Answer

No, very much the opposite. My drive is proportional to my happiness. Im not happy when im doing everything, stressed about life, and taking care of everyone else.

andreasderjuengere · Answer

Here in Thailand it means that the girl in question offers some underqualified work in the house, plus some mediocre sex - and in return she wants me to feed her entire family (and in some cases also her boyfriend).

Turn off? Well, well well.

TaureanBull81 · Answer

No it's a turn on as it shows that she's feminine and submissive 😊

Akam93 · Answer

As a woman I always take care of my man hopefully it never turns them off.

DermalPunch · Answer

It seems to be because those are the women getting played and left. Women should not being doing wife things with men they date. Period.

lightbulb27 · Answer

no. but if it's too early on and she's too aggressive, that is a turnoff... because trust is not established.

blueonblack22 · Answer

Like how so? Cooking and caring to listen about my problems is  definitely not a turn off.

tzdc21 · Answer

Furthest thing from. In fact that's one thing guys need in a woman they commit to. A woman who is WILLING to try to take care of him and support him as he does for her.

spartan55 · Answer

It's a fine line. I like feeling cared for. But it veers into "your stupid and don't know any better" territory very quickly.

Likes2drive · Answer

I think it would be nice for awhile but might get annoying eventually

tfan1 · Answer

No my wife used to be that way before we got married - I was her number one priority and thoroughly enjoyed it 👍🙂. But after we got married, I think her mom pushed her into us having our son. Which in a way was good because I found out that in her family, menopause comes unexpectedly earlier than either of us thought.

roy_ricky09 · Answer

It's not. But over doing something is not recommended

crossdressingrihno · Answer

It depends. Having an extra eye on the time would be amazing but I hate relying on others for anything too important.

sheikalana · Answer

I cannot speak on behalf of other men but my partner appreciates the fact that I baby him and take care of him.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I like your Question because that's what I'm looking for, and it's not a turn-off

Billlewis · Answer

That would probably depend on how you define 'take care of'.

worldscolide · Answer

Not at all. Granted I don't want to be "mothered" but if I'm sick, or emotionally distressed having someone that cares for me is nice. Granted I do the same in return. It's a two way street.

Meropatrick · Answer

No not at all. I really like a strong woman. But It will be in certain times and not all the time. Because i like to take care of my partner too

Andres77 · Answer

A cooperative partnership where no one is in charge of the other. No nagging, no fighting, helpful, supportive, wants them happy but is not responsible for their happiness.

Sanser · Answer

Nah I would like that she is worried about me but she must think about we are adults and not be like trying to correct all the things his man do because it can be frustrating.

Fuentes · Answer

I wouldn't want any women who acts like a mother to me lol

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

What guy, in his right mind, would not appreciate that?

MrNameless · Answer

That's fine. As long as she isn't overbearing and act like my mom lol

BlackJeep · Answer

It takes some getting used to but it is definitely a turn on having a woman who makes my life easier.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Turn off. My childhood has been over for many years. I can take care of myself now as an adult. Only a immature idiot wants a woman to be his mommy.

humanearth · Answer

My Wife does all that for me I'm so spoiled and I love every minute of it

Amur8711 · Answer

Honestly I want that, but there is a point where it hits nagging level. Thats not so nice lol

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Good question. I personally don't mind it, as long as she doesn't cross boundaries. And as long as it doesn't become an obsession for her.

Guys, is it a turn off if a woman wants to take care of you?

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Guys, is it a turn off if a woman wants to take care of you?

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