Do you have physical criteria/preferences for a dating partner and did you deliberately choose whatever your preferences are?

[OlderAndWiser]

I had a conversation with another user who said that she has no physical preferences or criteria for anyone that she would date, and I was very, very surprised. How can that possibly be?

My perception is that "virtually" everyone has preferences and criteria by which some potential dating partners would automatically be disqualified. I would be absolutely turned off by a woman whose boobs were noticeably larger than 36D or who had a masculine hairstyle. I have dated some women who were overweight, like this

but the idea of dating a woman like this

is repulsive.

I don't remembering ever pondering upon and deciding what my preferences and deal breakers should be; they just seem to be wired into me. You can tell me that this morbidly obese woman is a wonderful human being and it doesn't make a difference. I can't make myself be attracted to her.

If the answer is so obvious that the question seems to be stupid, I apologize, but I don't want to assume that I'm right. So. . . do you have preferences and criteria by which some potential dating partners would automatically be disqualified? If so, did you choose those preferences and criteria, or is that an subconscious process with you?

I don't have any preferences or criteria, and I would date anyone if they seem to be a nice person

I have preferences and criteria, but I would still date anyone if they seem to be a nice person

I have preferences and criteria, but I occasionally date someone who does not meet those preferences/criteriaey seem to be a nice person

I have preferences and criteria, and I won't date anyone who does not meet those preferences/criteria

I have preferences and criteria, but I have consciously changed those standards over time

Something else that I'll explain in a comment

[CubsterShura]

I don't have many strong preferences. I don't think of bodies in a "I like this body type more than that" but I more so think along the lines of "I like abc about this body type, I like xyz about that body type" etc. Just from my personal experience with some men of different body types, I learned that bodies that look the hottest don't necessarily feel the most amazing when we're having skin-to-skin contact with the lights off so a guy just looking hot, especially in photos doesn't do much for me anymore.

Sure, I haven't experienced all body types out there, but I find it a waste of my time and energy to think if I find those bodies or physical features attractive. So questions like "will you date a guy your height or shorter" or "will you date a guy who is fat" "will you date a guy covered in tattoos and piercings" make no sense to me, because again, I just have no data on them. If I ever encounter one, I'll know. If I don't, then it's not relevant or important for me to have a definitive answer.

I actually like it when a guy has a softer body (aka more fat under the skin) as opposed to when he is super ripped as hugs and cuddles just feel so much nicer. I also like skinnier lightweight bodies because they can lay on top of me without me feeling like I'm getting squashed. Height never mattered much to me and even after I've been with some guys who are a whole foot taller than me or more, I still stand by not caring much about height, in fact I kinda dislike it when a guy is too tall.

I have a boyfriend with physical features that check a lot of boxes for what I like. Literally no complaints here. 😊

[menina]

I do have some preferences that I choose. But I guess I could ignore them if the guy is a nice person. However, there's a preference I have and it's something I can't control. Some people mock me because of that, others get shocked and others criticize me. But I can't change that. 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

Obviously I wouldn't stop myself from dating a guy I really liked if he didn't match that criteria. I believe that everyone has their own preferences and criteria. The difference is that some people are really strict with it and others don't. I also find odd if someone says that they don't have preferences and/or criteria.

[menina]

Thanks for the MHO.

[AviatorTom]

I don't have preferences, but I do have some no-good criteria. I'm similar to the poster in that I wouldn't date a grossly overweight woman, for example.

[Avicenna]

Preferences? Sure, tall, skinny women. But it's not like I'd only date them.

[RoοstеrBrеаst]

As a boob enthusiast myself, I understand that my physical preferences and criteria for dating partners are deeply rooted in my love for boobs. I have deliberately chosen my attraction to large, firm, and round breasts as an essential aspect of my identity. These preferences are a part of who I am, and they can be traced back to my early days as a curious child who was fascinated by the wonders of the female anatomy.

As I matured and developed a stronger understanding of my attractions, I embraced my love for boobs, and it eventually became a driving force in my dating life. My penchant for boobs has become an essential aspect of my identity, and I have deliberately chosen to surround myself with those who share my passion. Such as @BoobSlayer.

My boob obsession has led me on many adventures in search of the perfect pair. I have tirelessly explored the vast landscape of breast sizes, shapes, and textures, relishing in the discovery of new and exciting breasts to marvel at. From the tiny teasers to the voluptuous va-va-voom, my boob fetish has transformed me into a connoisseur of the female form.

So, while it may seem strange to some that I have such specific preferences in a partner, my passion for boobs is a reflection of who I am and what I value. And as the fellow famed boob connoisseur, @Boobslayer, I continue to pursue my quest for the ultimate pair of melons, leaving a trail of satiated and satisfied women in my wake.

Looking at the bigger picture, it is quite clear that the obsession with boobs is a universal phenomenon. From the moment we come into this world, our eyes are drawn to the tantalizing allure of the female breast. They represent not only physical attraction, but also the mysterious, seductive essence of womanhood.

It is true that preferences and desires can be shaped over time, as individuals become more familiar with the various aspects of physical beauty. However, it is also important to recognize that this fascination with boobs is deeply rooted within the human psyche. It is not something that can be easily dismissed or ignored. So, dear @Boobslayer, rejoice in your love for the female breast, for it is a part of our very nature. Embrace the desire that burns within you, and may your eyes always be drawn to the beauty and allure of those mammary mounds. The world may change, but our love for boobs will always remain a constant, eternal flame."

https://www.youtube.com/embed/7CboLyKlWRk

[Lliam]

I have preferences, but they are not stringent.
I have to find her attractive.

She has have a cute face and pretty smile.

I like light-colored hair - natural blond, strawberry blond, ginger, red or light brown.

I like pale, glabrous skin.

I tend toward shorter girls. I'm 6'2 and my tallest girlfriend was close to 5'7". The shortest one was 5'2". My wife is 5'5". But I knew taller girls back in the day that I would have dated if we were compatible in other ways.

Her body has to have certain proportions, somewhere near the classic range of 36", 24", 36", meaning narrow shoulders; decent, medium-size boobs (let's say a 6" or 7" diff between her rib and bust measurements); relatively equal bust and hip measurements with a waist that is about 10" narrower. Hips that blend into her thighs in smooth curves. A plump, woman's ass. Nice legs with round, tapered thighs that aren't thick or skinny.

I like the right amount of subcutaneous fat which translates into feminine softness.

It's really hard to describe looks. I just know it when I see it.

[Jamie05rhs]

Yes, I have physical standards:

1. She cannot be fat. At all. I say this because I know for a fact that married women get lazy and put on a lot of weight during the five decades or so between their wedding and their death. (Or, I should say the first two decades. Because after that point they get arthritis and osteoporosis and therefore the weight gain is essentially irreversible.)
So I would rather have her start off skinny and end up slightly chubby than to start off chubby and end up obese.
(I actually am most attracted to women who are average weight -- not skinny. So therefore, if she starts off skinny, she will become more and more attractive to me as the years go on.)

2. She cannot be ugly. I say this because women want their men to compliment them, and I am a terrible liar. I don't even try to lie, because I know that I wouldn't be able to get away with it.
I want to be married to someone who I am truly attracted to, so I can tell her that she is beautiful and I can MEAN it! And she will be able to look into my eyes and KNOW that I mean it.

[Jamie05rhs]

(I actually voted C, though, for the record.)

[Anonymous]

I do. Now can I put them into words? No! I really wish I could. Because I myself would know what attracts me to a woman. I don't find fat attractive, yet I've been attracted to fat women. Why? I think it's because (at least to my knowledge) they owned and accepted who they are. I'm not saying they didn't have insecurity about it. But they didn't let that show. Basically what I'm saying is if you don't act like you're, for the lack of a better term "worthy" of me. Than I'm probably not going to believe that either. I think this why both genders get taken by slimeballs. Because it's usually the slimeballs that put on the best act. Because both (men and women slimeballs) work so much to perfect thier persona.

So this is why I've pretty much accept just being single because even if I meet a good women I'll likely never be attracted to her. And even if a woman looking for a good guy meets me, will never be attracted to me.

I don't know if that answered your question.

[BunBun369]

I mean I have my own personal standards. I think everyone should honestly. cuz if not what are you a ditto? (Pokemon) you can't just be with anyone lol well I mean you could be with anyone but it wouldn't last long or be fulfilled in someway shape or form.

That's like getting into a relationship with a man which I've seen woman do and like mold themselves into them like a ball of clay. As if they didn't have their own personality and or ideas or anything. To me that sounds hella desperate. And lazy and like you have given up. I don't know but everyone is different 🤦🏽‍♀️ what do I know. Lol

I am not insecure or self conscious that my look or style or personality or body weight or anything for that matter isn't anothers preference. I have been turned down. Because I thought someone was appealing to me in one shape or form. But I wasn't theirs. I mean it's not that damn serious to me. At all. There's ways of saying you're not interested without being a dick. Lol I mean if I can do it. 🤷🏽‍♀️.

Without a standard or a preference I feel like you're an inadment object 😂.

[Dinklex3]

It can be hard to list criteria or preferences if they don’t really matter all that much to the person.
In general I just have to find you attractive.

I like muscular men. Have I always liked muscular men? No. Before I was actually with one I used to say “ eww”. But I ended up with one and found him to be super attractive. Then I started liking muscular guys. But guess what? I was with someone the complete opposite afterwards. Slim, 6’5, Korean vs muscular, 5’5, black. & I found him just as attractive. I “prefer” men that are fit. But I’ve found guys on the chunkier side attractive and wouldn’t reject them just for being chunky if I already found them attractive. There are so many men that have different physical features, but are all equally attractive. If someone isn’t super muscular or around my height I don’t think of it as a “con” or negative because I see someone as a whole and don’t pick out small physical features that make someone attractive.

On the health side and not solely for looks, I do prefer to date someone fit and into health & wellness. Because that’s what I’m into and it’s always nice to have a motivational exercise partner and healthy eating buddy.

So I can definitely believe that someone doesn’t have any preferences or criteria based on looks or perhaps just can’t think of any. Plenty of friends used to have these preferences in high school and early college based on Hollywood actors/social media, then ended up marrying men the complete opposite and still finding them 100% attractive.

[alice55]

I don't really have much preference other than taller than me. I used to be into blonde guys with blue eyes and pale skin but I've found myself to be attracted to very different people, races, height, weight, etc... I would say the only I don't like are those that are in the morbid obesity or those that have too thin body.

In the first pictures the woman is definitely not overweight... She have a healthy body... My mother is bigger than her and she's in the "normal" bmi range so this woman is nowhere near overweight (in the medical sense).

[KostasKouvalis]

Yeah, I'm noticing that your tastes/standards have changed a little since we first met. That's great😉

It's the same with me. In middle school and high school I wanted a Scandinavian wife, but then in college I began finding increasingly attracted to South Asian, Middle Eastern, Latinas and even Indegenous. I even had a very brief Asian phase believe it of not😂 And then Georgian. But the one I can't seem to get over are Indian girls. I've had some brief moments when I learned something or they started to bore me and I lost my attraction, but I always end up going back to them. They're the ones I've never been able to get over.
I'm sad to say, I've kind of lost interest in White women, because they're so boring, but also too many of them have gone woke and started hating their own race. I was into Ukrainian and Icelandic girls for a while, but Icelandic are too Liberal and Ukrainian aren't that attractive and they seem too mature and high maintenance. The only White girls I'm still interested in and attracted to are French and South African and Argentinan a little, which is weird because I used to have no interest in French girls at all and couldn't understand why they're so popular, but now they're probably my second biggest obsession after Indian girls😂 If I can't get an Indian girl, I will try to get a French girl! I'll admit that YOU'RE largely responsible for my new found obsession for French girls. ^_^

[OlderAndWiser]

Perhaps you subscribe to the body positivity movement and you think everyone should be told they are beautiful, but acting as if fat is normal is not healthy for our society or the individuals who are given a false sense of their physical fitness.

I can guarantee you that most men will say that the woman in the first photo is obese, and especially so for guys over the age of 25.

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis Yes, they have become a lot more broad compared to before where they were very narrow.

Foe the White women stuff it's just cause you live in California majority of women are not like that at all, in France it's only a minority of Rich young Parisian women but others than that 99 % of White women aren't like that at all here.
The woke stuff exist nearly only in Anglo Saxon countries.
That's great ^-^

[alice55]

I don't give a shit what people are saying the first girls is definitely in the healthy range and I don't give a shit either about body positive movement. You're just completely crazy if you think the woman in the blue underwear is obese you're completely delusional. Like a said my mother is bigger than her and the doctor told her she was in the healthy range of bmi so there's no ways this woman is nowhere near being big.
You should get you eyes checked or more see a physiologist years of underweight being trendy didn't go good to you...

[KostasKouvalis]

Mine definitely have as well ^_^
That's true. My area is pretty conservative, but it's more complicated than just politics. But I wouldn't want a Southern girl either because they talk funny and they're TOO Conservative and Nationalistic. While I'm just a moderate Conservative.

You should see the follow up question he wrote to this referencing YOUR post.
Be careful. He'll report you and have your post remove for telling him how he really is.

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis That's a great things :)
If you're a moderate conservative then you would be good in the French countryside, most guys are like you moderate conservative here, they're modern on some subject and more conservative on others.
What an assholes, at his age it's quite pathetic how he's acting.

I'm wondering what do you think of the woman weight? Is she fat to you? Cause medically she's definitely in the healthy range, it doesn't surprise me people think she's big cause the trends before was to be extremely skinny but that's quite worrying, no wonder people created the whole body positivity if normal weight people were considered big. American are crazy especially with all the obese people they have, the woman is skinnier than the average American and the consider that fat.

[KostasKouvalis]

Maybe chunky/curvy, but definitely not fat. I've seen bigger girls then her who I found attractive and wouldn't consider fat. The girl in the second picture is FAT! The dude must have funhouse lenses in his glasses, if he thinks the first girl is "fat"

This is in reply to Emmy's post, who's blocked:

That's actually kind of true. But if you get rejected in a humiliating way, that makes the girl fake too. I hate hypocrites. And if you're just trying to hook-up, sure. But normally if you're already close to begin with and the girl rejects you, he will still be a loyal friend if he's not fake.
Ryan posted this video from a French YouTuber who was saying Male/Female friendships don't exist, because the man will always be hoping for sex and a relationship. But I believe it's possible to still want those things, while still being a genuine friend.

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis The only things is that she have a high fat percentage easily solved by not eating cheese and cream.
If she were to cut on fat she will lose the belly fat and look leaner.

In his other question he thought the girls was obese...
I would like to see what he look like considering he call someone normal obese...
Of course it's possible to be a genuine friends even if one want both, a good person would stay a loyal friend no matter what. In the other ways it mean that they were never friends to begin with and all was fake.

[petitedollbabee]

Only two, really, and they’re both for health concerns. First would be I wouldn’t date someone who’s morbidly obese. If something happened to them like a heart attack or they fell over, I can’t move them or do anything because I can’t lift or move 150kg+. And if they rolled over in their sleep and squashed me, I wouldn’t be happy.
Second would be I wouldn’t date someone with a “member” that’s 6 inches or longer. It’s painful due to my own health issues and I can’t date someone if our sex life is miserable.

[magiusX26]

those are both actually good and fair. am impressed actually.

[AaronKrieger]

I have certain preferences that I heavily prefer, but I'll date a girl who doesn't have all of them. However, she does need to have one of them or else she likely won't be my type and the lack of strong attraction would be an issue.

Everyone is different in that regard and also everyone is at a different place in their life too. For me, I find the body in the first picture very attractive, but I agree with the second picture, yet there are obese women I do find attractive. Nothing is straight forward.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

Should be able to touch your toes with less than 2 minutes of stretching cuz I already know y'all not drinking enough water.

If she's fat, she needs to take care of her skin, if she's skinny, she needs to not starve herself but either way she gotta have a nice booty

Taller than 5"5 shorter than 6'3 mostly out of practicality.

How about just know what you want and for that to include a family? A desire to be a constructive influence on your man's life and to trust your man to do the same? That's all I really care about. I already bagged enough pussy, a body is a body for the most part. I'm essentially biologically programmed to get an rection once you take your clothes off, my sex life has proven that to me time and time again. It's still fun to have those types of encounters but it's starting to feel childish at this point in my life. I'm more interested in what we can build together.

[provokeesmokee]

I've certainly gotten more selective as my dating life has gone on.

Now, I won't date folks who can't care for themselves and their health. They don't need to be superfit, but they have to have control over their lives and (mostly) themselves.

My current litmus test is they gotta be able to regularly rock climb. It's my big sport and I want to share it with my partner. I also want someone who can keep up with me, physically. It's a pretty good test to bring someone climbing.

I've been stronger than evey man I've dated, and only was weaker than my exgf who was also much taller than me, lol.

I want to date people who enjoy physical activity and movement. I've become more selective for sure, but it helps because it also means I have to be able to keep up with whoever I date.

[ZamerZ]

The one true preference I do have is men wearing their hair long. I suppose that is because I grew up in a household that loved Hard Rock and Heavy Metal and I've seen the band members on posters, vinyl covers and so on - plus, my favorite uncle was my hero and basically a walking reflection of young Dave Mustaine. Most of my relationships have been with long-haired guys, but I'd never be opposed to date someone with short hair - or if they were blond. Another preference of mine are dark hair, but I'd never turn someone down because of their hair color.

[Grond21]

It depends on the preference for me. Some of them are a must, some of them are important but not necessary, and some of them are just a want.

I don't think I chose any of them. Not consciously. What was interesting though is that growing up I didn't find black women or East Asian women attractive. But then I worked with a lot of black women in a restaurant and eventually a switch was flipped. I started finding them attractive because I was around them a lot.
Years later, the same thing happened in a different restaurant with East Asian women. So a lot of it is just what you experience as normal.

[Apple1996]

Nope never had preferences and neither does my husband. Looks don't matter to us.

Also super funny you mention boob size because my husband somehow didn't notice that I've gained 4 cup sizes since we've been together. Guess when you are in love then you don't pay attention to things like that

[Grond21]

I would absolutely notice that

[Apple1996]

@Grond21 yeah but it was a slow change over 10 years so hard to notice

[Grond21]

Let me rephrase. I would ABSOLUTELY notice that

[Staximus]

When I was young I wasn't into chubby girls but now chubby women with pretty faces seem attractive. I'm kind of fat and not in the greatest shape anymore, so I try to be realistic in my dating expectations. After literally laying in bed and smoking cigarettes for a year during covid out of sheer boredom and disgust with society's cowards, I went up to the mountains for a couple days when everything opened back up. I was still able to hike a over a mile uphill at 7000 feet elevation. I need a woman who is not so fat and out of shape that she can't keep up with me. At low elevation I can literally walk all day. I So I guess I'll say what I always do here, as long as she's not fatter than me and doesn't have a face like a bulldog.

[Mamaliv]

I’m a very sexual being, physical attraction is important to me and I also want the man I’m with to think I am sexy AF. I was married for 13 years, I was disgusted with him by the time our marriage ended, but it was personality too. I’ve also since learned that the more you open up to someone and allow yourself to love them that you’ll find yourself more attracted to them. So I’m not centered on one certain type but I also am not interested in a man that clearly doesn’t take care of himself.

[Lonestar13]

I believe its wired in men to choose women who are healthy to procreate.. why do men like boobs and hips? Its healthy to feed and carry babies.. its attractive.. then as that stage of life changes with age... well a lot of married men with wives with baby fat and gained some but are soft and cuddly but not obese like second photo.. its fine. Its comfortable its emotional closeness and trust after 15 years together. But be realistic.. most men see airbrushed models and think women naturally look like that?

[Selliebeanz]

I just like guys who are taller and have a certain look to their eyes sort of a mischievous look. Other than that I think white boys are adorable. So like taller, light brown hair, brown eyes that have a honeyish look to them or hazel. It’s really their manner of speaking too. Personality is a huge factor but that’s another conversation.