Overthinking something my boyfriend said this morning. He was not at all trying to insult me or make me feel bad. Just I guess sorta made me feel sad, not his fault though. But is someone who skipped college and sorta has a shutty job dumb? I didn't go to college due to severe social anxiety. Literally school was hard enough at times for me, let alone college which would have hundreds of more people. I sorta knew if I went the chances of me getting so overwhelmed with anxiety of being around people I'd do something stupid to myself. So I didn't go like I had originally planned. I even got accepted to a college I wanted to go to. But I decided I couldn't and then ended up getting a job which sucks but it does pay my bills. Not nearly a nice job like him but I mean i work and do everything else I can I guess. But I sorta felt dumb when I told him I'm insecure about speech issues I have (I can't pronounce certain words so I get embarrassed badly over it). And then him asking me if I feel dumb because of him going to college and having a nice job. I know he didn't mean it badly. Pretty sure he was trying to tell me I'm not dumb. It just sorta made me feel less than because I never went and have what people would say is a shitty job
Most people miss this but the actual point of going to college, if the college is good, is to teach you how to educate yourself on any topic you want to learn.
Not going to college doesn't make you dumb, it just means you have to learn how to educate yourself which in turn could mean you are smarter than those who go to college.
My girlfriend chose to join the Army and retired after 20 years. In may ways she thinks like you, but I think she is very, very smart. I went to a technical school and got an Associates Degree because I was in a hurry to start my career.
Along the way I have had to reeducate myself because I decided to change careers to make more money so I wasted my time getting the Associates Degree, or did I? The best education I got my whole time in college I got one evening having a 30 minute discussion with one of my professors who told me what I just told you about self education because "in life we can't stop learning or we become obsolete with the rate of technology changes".
Therefore I say to you go to college or not doesn't matter on whether or not you obtain the education necessary to work in the field you want. Having a degree doesn't make you smarter for some it could mean you are just good at cheating. I run circles around guys with masters degrees in my field who probably cheated their way through school.
The internet literally is filled with people who are willing to educate you on any given field and even fields that require licenses to practice in you can show up to take the test without the degree. Don't get me wrong I wouldn't seek to become a self taught doctor, but it's technicality possible.
My point is don't limit yourself because you didn't go to college. Also with your anxiety have you considered online college? It's never too late if you really want to get the formal education to give you a start. When I was 10 years old my mom started college as a 30 year old single mom and at 35 became a Registered Nurse changed her life and mine.
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Not going to college doesn't make you dumb any more than going to college makes you smart. My little sister didn't go to college and I did, and she makes more money in a higher position than me right now.
It's really down to the individual. You decided college wasn't right for you, and that takes smarts to realize. Especially when it's pushed so much that everyone is expected to go right after highschool.
I will add it sounds like your problems with college and work could be related. Studies show that more assertive people usually get better positions and pay. So while I don't think you need to go to college to get a good job, you may try finding some resources online or near where you live to help manage your anxiety and become more confident in your work skills. Confidence is not everything, but it certainly helps.
Yeah, if your anxiety is that bad I’m not surprised you’re overthinking that statement so much. You’re not necessarily dumb, it depends on your personal career goals. Some goals require a college education, others require trade school education, others just require a high school degree. If you’re good with what you have, then it doesn’t really matter. Keep doing you and maybe keep an eye on your boyfriend, he probably enjoys feeling a little superior to you in some ways.
If you want to change it, go the fiscal route, do community college instead, get the base class credits out of the way for a 2 year degree and then you can decide if you want to move on to a 4 year.
No. College is only for learning and studying a career. If a person doesn't have any plans or means to go to college, then that's fine. I never went to college since I 1. Didn't know what I'd even go there for and 2. Have no idea what I can or can't do yet. It'd be pointless to get a degree for a career that you only find out years later you don't have the ability to do it. I know when I graduated they told me I should and I'm like "But I don't even know what I'd do as a career. I just graduated high school." If anything, I might go to vocational school at least in the future. But until then only time can tell.
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- u
nope... that's not how it works
you can be smart, and intelligent... and graduate from college, and still be "dumb" with some stuff, at other things...
you can't not go to college, and still be smart, and quite intelligent at so many other things other than one career that one could graduate
I quit college half way... full scholarship, perfect grades and I already had a very good job secured in advance... and still quit all that, only few people were upset but not for long
they knew my reasons... and that I had different goals... now, yes... it could have been dumb of me to go two years of college and quit it, but hey, that's life and a lot of other things do happen, it is never so simple and I do not regret a thing at all... the friends and the people I met during college are still with me and for life too, lol I'm of the opinion that everyone is equally intelligent (in proportion to their age). It's just that what some people "know" is more profitable than what others know. College merely increases the odds that what you know can be turned into money and usually increases the amount of money it can be turned into. It's not even really the academic content that matters: it is the skills in delayed gratification that are a necessary component of any degree. Planning ahead. Working for someone. Sacrificing free time to take care of responsibilities. Etc.. that's what employers of higher paying jobs want to know you are capable of and college is a basic way to show that capability. Jobs that can be fully trained up on the first day don't need any of that but jobs that could take years before you start being productive really do.
I used to feel that way, but understanding the difference between intelligence and academic knowledge helped. I know I'm uninformed in many of the subjects people my age who are going to college are, but I'm also confident that I'm an intelligent person regardless. More intelligent, in every other way but that, than many of them.
Okay- you are not dumb. Lots of people have life circumstances that prevents them from going to college. Maybe you could still go. You are older and more mature now and more confident. You might realize that there is no reason to be anxious. Plenty of people go later in life and it is more prevalent today.
Dumb is relative, I've met lots of people in my life that did well in school that were book smart (or just worked really hard at it) compared to someone who is naturally smart and quick on their feet.
In short, if you are already well read and smart in the area you want a career in, then you don't necessarily have to go to college. However, most employers look for some kind of degree to know you at least have a working knowledge of the job.
you might be smart, not the type to sit in a chair and listen, or driven... like Steve Jobs, B. Gates, etc..
So no...
Even if you are dumb, you can be really successful in this country and live a good life, just making good decisions.
Nope. In my case it would have been unwise to continue. By the end of my freshman year, my business was already earning me more than my intended degree ever would have so I dropped out and focused on that. Yes, I've been rejected for not having a degree, but I would not want to be with a lady with such a myopic view of life anyway.
I was 31 before I went to college. Basically because my SO insisted I try.
I was the same age as my lecturers and actually knew some of the stuff before I read the material. I struggled with accounting and economics - no surprise since I failed it at 18 - but got it eventually.
Then two years later found out my aversion was because I had ADHD. Which didn't exist when I was at school.No, you don't need college. These days it is not the end all be all. Look at the students today half can't read half can't write Sheepskin in Woke studies. Good luck getting a job and paying hundreds of thousands of dollars for the honor of being an uneducated woke No college retired in 2002 was making between $114,000 and $ 117,000 a lot more than a lot of college grads My son no college making $140,000 plus medical and retirement plus a savings plan
Sometimes it's the dumb thing to do. Without knowing the entire circumstances, it's impossible to say for sure. College is great for some people, but most don't need it and its associated expenses.
What is your next step with career choices?
don’t take things too personal will help you walk through life a little easier.
what’s the cause of your anxiety?No you're certainly not dumb for not going off to college. I know a lot of people who became more successful not going to college than going off to college. College isn't for everybody. And it sure as hell beats having an ass of student loan debt.
- m
u won't need to go to college to be smart
trust me
college is full of silly people
You’re not dumb if you don’t go to college everyone has a different life path. And school isn’t for everyone many successful people don’t have degrees.
My friend never got a college degree and her husband is a VP at a hedge fund. They have been together over 13 years and have 2 kids.
College is irrelevant to IQ.
Tesla never got a degree.No but you are dumb if you don't get some proper training and employable skills under your belt.
Education doesn’t correlate intelligence. My old boss is dyslexic AF, barely finished highschool and is worth probably $3-400 million
No but you need to make sure you can support yourself without being stuck with him or your family
I didn’t go to college, but it’s not because I’m dumb
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