Would you feel comfortable having a male babysitter for your children, that is not a family member?

[Prof_Don]

I was watching TV and an add for one of the those find-a-babysitter websites popped up.

Something peculiar that I noticed, was how all of the little kids talked about their past babysitter, or a hypothetical future babysitter, as "she". Never once was "he" used once in the entire commercial!

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Whether you do have youth kids now, or want to have kids in the future... would you be ok letting a male babysitter,

who is NOT a family member or a friend,

babysit your kids if he had a clean background check?

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Vote and reply as much as you wish!

Yes, I would be perfectly comfortable with a male babysitter that I didn't know personally, as long as he passed a background check

I have to admit i'd be more comfortable if it was a FEMALE babysitter instead; something about a male babysitter I don't personally know still bothers me

If I had a boy (s)... yes. No way if I had a girl (s)!

If I had a girl (s)... yes. No way if I had a boy (s)!

No way am I having a male babysitter that I don't know personally watch my kid (s) at all, regardless if the background check was completely clean or not and regardless of the sex of my children

I don't have and/or don't want kids, just show me the answers please!

[5x9BOB]

When I was in junior high school I've babysat kids here and there when the parents will go out on weekends or whatever. By myself I was good to go. But I also had a buddy who's babysitting some kids for a couple days and asked me if I wanted to come over. He said he would come get me, and I said cool. Well he pulls up in this black BMW that's obviously not his but the parent's car and on our way back to the house with the kids in tow mind you, went too fast around the corner and slid off the road into a ditch. We got pulled out and not much damage but noticeable by the parents when they got back. I would say yes because of me and no because of him so I suppose I would rather trust a girl than a guy. A guy for a couple hours probably not a problem

[jimmijo1954]

That’s a great story and it was well articulated thanks for sharing

[Miristheiss]

No.

It's pure math, most of the sexual abuse stories (not all you contrarians) are done by men and most women are more nurturing than men (most not all you contrarians) therefore I'm not up for challenging the math... I'll just go with the percentages of which scenario is more likely to turn out well for my kids.

[Prof_Don]

Percentages show that people the victim knows are more likely to molest them... are u going to hire strangers over your own family and friends to babysit your kids? 😂

[NetFreak12]

It would be great if you can put up these percentages here citing a reliable source. Also, the percentage of total population distribution in areas where crimes are committed.

[Miristheiss]

You put the criteria "that is not a family member" in the question. Word your question differently if you want to change the terms. It's like you are arguing with yourself.

[Prof_Don]

It's a follow-up question, about your reason being about statistical data, aka "pure math".

That being said, if u use "pure math", it is safer to have a stranger watch your kids than family/friends, seeing that "pure math" shows that the majority of molestation happens by someone who personally knows the victim.

Are u going to abandon your "pure math" reasoning (and be a hypocrite), and have family members watch your kids instead of strangers with clean background checks?

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

Yeah I’d be okay with it, he may genuinely like kids and have a dream about being a stay at home dad. At which point I’ll already be drilling safety into my children’s heads and telling my children about molestation, inappropriate behavior & inappropriate touching, kidnapping, and rape. That they can come to me about anything if they feel uneasy. I’ll let him know if I even think he might be harming my children he’s going to wish he hadn’t no one will hear from him again. I see where you’re going but it can happen with family and even female babysitters, she could be a sick individual that could bring her pervert boyfriend over if I’m not there. I watch the crime stories faithfully.

[dragonfly6516]

Hmm, let me think on that. If people leave their kids to hang out with other kids that are at that time in the care of their own fathers, if more female teachers have been convicted of illicit sex acts with minors than men, if we leave our kids with male teachers, then why shouldn't we trust a male babysitter as much as a female?

People just think it's weird because its different. We're still in the process of progressing out of a time when women did all the child rearing. It's still "atypical" to think of a man in what has always been thought of as a "woman's job".

But there's nothing wrong with it. He's no more likely to harm your kids than any female.

[lumos]

I picked A, but I interpreted "background check" as him having recommendations, and preferably him knowing one of my friends or family from having babysat for them before.
That's how my parents picked our babysitters. They were always recommended by someone else. I think they only ever picked someone once that they hadn't heard of before. But then they invited her for coffee, as sort of an interview.
So no, I wouldn't have a problem with a male babysitter, as long as he had been recommended by someone else (so, "background checked"). I don't see how it's any different from a man working at a kindergarten, or a man working as a teacher.

[BeeNee]

Of all of my family who have young children, not one of them hires strangers to watch their kid. They are always family, friends, or at the very least, in a pinch, they are people that have specifically been recommended by family and friends who have used x babysitter before. It has nothing to do with male/female, but being able to feel at least, like you can trust this person not to harm your child in anyway, and even with agencies, background checks aren't always reliable.

[SouthpawPablo]

I can say im a felon but i would die to protect any child in this world on the other hand background check only works if they have been caught being scum of the earth already

[Brelir]

I picked "yes" but you are right. I'd rather ask a family member or a close friend if a babysitter is needed.

[MissMurphy]

Here's the thing, I work in an industry where there are not a lot of women. I deal with a certain amount of gender bias as a matter of course.

I can't fight against the idea that women can be good at physical, mechanical jobs while holding on to the idea that men can't be good caregivers for children. There aren't very many areas where men get shafted of the equality front, but that's one of them.

So sure, I'd hire a male babysitter for my very theoretical child. I'd hope enough people would for it to become normal. I'm all for more male babysitters, social workers, kindergarten teachers. If that's what you want to do, better you than me.

[TripleAce]

Lol ya im falling victim here
Id prefer a female babysister
Just for a few reasons
- i can relate to her better emotional as im a male
- i feel she might have more empathy
- she might have gave birth herself or waiting for that day allowing her to appreciate a child a little more, maybe?
- i feel she might be more nurturing overall
- and a bonus of course if she's cute n hot maybe ill get to see her panties exposed at some point

But all that is just a perception. Doesn't mean a guy can't be good too

[Pegases]

This is interesting because almost all of the guys I've known that lost their virginity at a young age lost it to female babysitters. It's a common misconception that men are less capable babysitting than men, but of course our society loves to make men out to be sexual beasts incapable of self control. Its a pity because baby sitting pays well. And also because clearly a lot of women that shouldn't be watching children get the opportunity to do so solely because they are women.

[Pegases]

"It's a common misconception that men are less capable of self control than women"*

[Chaz269]

If you dig a little deeper you'll learn that male teachers find it very difficult to get jobs in elementary skools. Research indicates that there is an underlying belief that all men are inherently dangerous to small children be it for violence, sexuality, or excessive stoopidity. Not only has our society not evolved much in this regard, we're not even discussing it because no one wants it to change. This stereotype permeates every aspect of society. Mothers can barely stand the thought of kids being alone with their own fathers, let alone a stranger.

[jimmijo1954]

So do you believe this is it accurate stereotype? Are children really unsafe around grown men? Do you really believe that? Do young mothers today have a real concern with grown men around their children or is it just that they are millennials in there for a product of The “scared” generation? Has liberalism really taken us to this point? This is an indication of the downfall of a once great society. A society that talked itself into being too scared to even function normally. Literally scared of its own shadow... sooo pathetic!!

[AdmiralBailey]

I was thinking about babysitting once I get a car because I saw this ad on Craigslist of a woman asking for one but I didn't feel right taking the job without a car in case of emergency. I then thought... oh.. wait... I'm a black dude... she'd never trust me in a million years with her kids

[Prof_Don]

Unfortunately I know first hand about being presumed to be some sort of dangerous person, just by being a black male 🙄

[AdmiralBailey]

I know man! lol It's a shame. I was hoping to practice fatherhood while earning money.

[Anonymous]

When I was little, a male babysitter touched my brother inappropriately, but the court in one state didn’t take the claim of a child as evidence. In that state, the guy is still free and unmarked in background checks. If he ever goes to VA though, he is a listed pedifile. This means, he could potentially have a clear background check from one state (his state of residence). You can’t completely trust anyone... But, tbh, I just wouldn’t feel comfortable leaving any children with a male other than... well, my brother.

[jimmijo1954]

Yes I would especially not being a family member. It seems like the statistics I keep hearing that statistically speaking children are more likely to be molested by members of their own family. If that is true maybe it would be better to have non-family members around. I’m speaking in general of course, not my own family.

[Pattz]

When I was 6, a male babysitter used to take care of me. He was pretty cool tbh, we used to play on my PlayStation and then he'd tell me about his stories and tell me what girls liked and stuff. I never felt unsafe with him, hell I liked him more than my siblings!

[babygloss]

I’d have a hard time leaving anyone to watch my child unless I really really knew them. So many crazy things happen in today’s day. I wouldn’t really trust anyone to watch my kids other than my parents or family members who I’ve learned to trust while growing up.

[Shawn58]

can i message you

[BrighteyedAsh]

My son has had AMAZING male teachers so yea I'd definitely feel ok with any male that was up to code with my standards.

To add to that... typically men don't step up to this role because it doesn't grab their attention as desirable. Most men are more likely to take a coach role in similar relation to impacting children.

The reason behind it is science related in terms of statistical bio-makeup.

[passionforprince]

It depends but I most likely would have a female for my female children because they could relate better do hair and play dolls. But I would not be adverse to giving it a try if it was someone with a great resume and references. Both male and females are capable of nurturing so I am sure there are great male sitters.

[GeminiAgent007]

Nope neither seen a lot of videos of female babysitters caught abusing kids as well while smiling to the unsuspecting partners faces, not allowing my kids to be cared for by anyone I don't entirely trust and based on my own childhood some family members will be excluded too

[vishna]

I mean, of course I would have apprehensions about any stranger around my kids. And yea, I might be more afraid if he was a man. But as long as he had good recommendations, seemed respectable and kind, and I had baby monitors (all requirements for a female baby sitting my kids too) I would allow him to have the job.

[snowangle]

Ideally, I'd only want to have babysitters who I know personally. But if that's not possible, I wouldn't rule out a babysitter just because he's male. If he seemed like a responsible and caring young man, I'd hire him.

Probably have a nanny cam no matter what, though.

[ToxicKisses]

I dont see a problem in it. Check him out, see if his experience and history satisfy me and if its all good I go with it. Bot men and women are capable of doing bad things, but also capable of taking good care of children. Gender doesn't play a big role there

[Jmcmanning]

I am very particular on who is involved in the care of my son. I had a hard time leaving my son with my parents, who i trust completely, when he was little. He's 16 now so it's not an issue. Nowadays, you have to be extracareful on who you trust with your kids. They pass the background check but whose to say they haven't done something they haven't been caught for yet.

[chris1984]

although its hypocritical, i would be uncomfortable with a male babysitter i hadn't had time to interact with being alone with my kids, yet typically comfortable with a female.

even in my own interactions with kids such as my neices, i am aware of the immediate concern people have about male to child interactions in public.

there seems to be an assumption that males are likely to abuse children, and females would never. its bullshit, but absolutely present in society.

[ladsin]

I said A, although the more likely scenario would be that I would know or know the parents of my babysitter. I, in general, don't think I'd like the idea of a stranger in my home watching my babies. Who knows though, maybe when I get older I won't care as much.

[jack187625]

Recently their was an advert for nappies. In this advert a baby was implied to be female and they implied that it was going to be a ballerina.
A male baby was implied to become a scientist.

People complained that it was sexist, they had to change it, I don't see any difference here.

[jimmijo1954]

Based on the words you’ve used and what you said I’m going to assume you must be from the UK? This good example of how far liberalism and political correctness has taken our society in general. The Liberals couldn’t leave well enough alone they had to push push push until now this is where we are we have to change advertisements for simple implications that are perceived to be stereo typical in nature even if they are not talk about overly sensitive that’s just plain stupid.

[jack187625]

Why yes I am, well noticed!

For the advertisement I can see why people think it is pointless to change, it in itself won't affect a baby.

But what it will affect is an older generation, making more likely to reinforce gender stereotypes. There was recently a TV programme about gender roles with school children, how the way we teach younger children greatly effects later life etc. And gender profiling is part of that.

Most of the time these things having little to do with who they are aimed at, but more to change their perceptions.

[katjakazuhira]

I'd always be much more comfortable looking after my own kids, or having a family member do it, but if I did need to get a babysitter I'd hold both genders to the same standard. If I distrusted me that much I wouldn't have gone and made a baby with one in this hypothetical scenario.