Imagine you lived in the past when all mail was delivered by horse. If you sent a letter and it took days to get a response you may worry but I doubt you'd immediately assume he doesn't like you. You'd stay hopeful but continue on with life.
The problem is today we've been conditioned to expect immediate gratification. I have a question I ask google I find the answer. I'm hungry I drive a few minutes and get some food. I'm bored so I find something entertaining somewhere. Everything takes seconds. Everything that's easy at least. Getting in good shape takes a lot more than two weeks of dieting and being the best in the world at something usually takes decades of hardwork. Good relationships are the same. Phones are a crutch and honestly a crippling device for relationships. They give the illusion of conversation when in reality it's both of you simply writing sentences at each other. The amount of communication that is lost through text is saddening. The inflection of a voice, the subtle movements of the face and body, the cadence of their speech, the proximity of the two of you, all erased from the conversation leaving huge holes for speculation.
In my opinion, anything you believe or feel from a text, or lack of one, says more about you than the other person. Mostly because you know for a fact the huge range of possibilities that could exist but choose one possible reality as the most likely one. Maybe he doesn't like you, or maybe he lost his phone, maybe he's just really nervous and doesn't know how to respond, maybe he got distracted while texting back and has a message just sitting there waiting to be sent to you. All of these are equally possible but if you view yourself as undesirable you'll probably say he doesn't like you. If you view him as scatterbrained you'll probably assume he got distracted. If you think you've hurt his feelings you'll assume something different.
Imagine you've got a little pair of glasses in front of your eyes that change what you see depending on how you felt when you woke up this morning. That's pretty much how everyone experience life. So maybe he doesn't like you or maybe he thinks you don't like him.
So does his waiting to text back mean nothing or something? I don't actually know and with time you'll probably find the answer to that question. There's billions of men and you've got just as many positives (and negatives) as everyone else in the world just relax and be kinder to yourself.
wow.
All it means is he is dis-respectful of you (depending on the time). If your talking it takes him a day to reply, he is just disrespectful. If your talking hours, then it means nothing.
The issue with young people is they rely on texting instead of talking. Texting is for communication that is not important and the person can reply whenever. Calling is when you need something replied to asap as well as hearing the persons voice. If I am at work, or tied up, it can take me hours to reply. But I always have time to reply before bed. Even if it is "I will get back to you tomorrow". There is NEVER justification for going a day or more without replying.
It could mean lack of interest if he consistently is not responding in a timely manner. On the other hand he could just be super busy and has nothing to do with his interest. Girls are very intuitive. If when you're together he's very engaging and seems interested but on occasion he is a terrible texter, blow it off. If he makes no attempts to spend time with you and is always not texting back in a reasonable amount of time to hold a conversation then that's another story. Go with your gut.
My boyfriend is a terrible texter but he just has a lot going on. He always makes time for me and makes sure to talk to me at some point throughout the day.
It depends really. Sometimes you get busy or you forget, or service sucks. My friend sent me a text at the end of February that I didn't see until a month later so it is possible. Luckily she's not mad lol
If he does that all the time though it's not a good sign. He's either not interested or he considers you his backup plan. Neither one is good,
Texting is the Thing Today Here, dear. More Convenient, I agree.
However, we All get Busy, but at Least it's always Polite, to just Push a Button and at Least Say, "Talk later," Not Leave you Hanging by a Thin Thread.
A True Friend will Not do this Here, dear, He or She is Near.
Listen to your True Friend to the End.
Good Luck. xx
I think a talk later is useful in lots of situations. depending who is the person then I simply take it as something normal or take it as "this person is not relaible" that is most cases. advice, let be, accept it, if it really bothers you then let go. dont chase.
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What you should be worried about is if he responds seconds after each text... what kind of exciting life does the guy live if he is always available?
Most often, it simply means he's busy. We have lives outside of the girls we like, and things to get done (and, yes, relaxing can be one of those things).
Sometimes it can mean that the girl is being too clingy and needy and that she often has nothing of substance to talk about, but wants to keep chatting (about nothing) anyway, which guys tend to find annoying.
But, mostly, it just means he's busy.
People always generalize
If u analyze a person it's very important to know HIS/HER NORMAL BEHAVIOR. And this is different from person to person.
1. There are people who like texting and have much time and they usually reply fast.
If they reply faster than usually or slower it can mean something
2. there Are also People who like texting but they are busy. In this case it doesn't mean anything if he takes his time to reply but it can mean that he likes u a lot if he is busy but still replies fast
And so on I think u get what I mean...
Well coming from a guy, no. Guys are busy a lot to be honest; They either are compulsive and text back right away or are busy and don't have time for responding. It all depends on the person though, is he social, does he play sports, is he available a lot, etc. But does he show signs he likes you?
that depends. sometimes, especially if they like you, they will take some time to carefully think about what they want to say in hopes they don't break boundaries or say the wrong thing. however there are are reasons to why he might not reply quickly, some are simple like being busy, phone died, connection etc. don't look too deep into the time between texts, that will only create anxiety and assumptions leading to complicated thoughts and relationships.
You get zero emotion and no body language, so you miss at least half of what is being communicated. You simply cannot forge a relationship by texting.
If they're sitting there with their phone and not answering you there's something else going on. If they're busy otherwise then they answer when they can.
So many games... so little time. :)
At the beginning of texting, no. They may have lives or may be trying to play hard to get. Once the relationship starts progressing or you have tried to text for several months and he STILL is taking forever than, yeah, I would say that's probably a pretty big "no".
If a guy takes long to respond that means nothing, right?
Yes, it means nothing. Males, in general, have better listing skills than women. Males think things out before responding. For a woman, she already cutting into what male saying and does not hear all that men say. Females heard what they what to hear and respond before the male finishing talking. There is research on this matter.
Yup, drives me fk'n nuts when I am trying to explain something and then I get cut off before I get the whole context of what I am saying out. Usually it ends up as an argument because my partner only takes the first 1/4 or first 1/2 of what I was saying and jumps right in with her own opinion before I got to the point I was trying to make.
I rarely ever interrupt someone when they are talking so I can't stand it when someone does it to me.
@LesterJester
Totally agree3 with you brother. They really never hear what you said. They hear a word and really to talk. They have done studies on the female in a group with a word in the first person. You say it softly to the other in their ear. The time it gets to the last person. It not the word. Most of the time the word at the end person has nothing to do with the word at the beginning.
Depends. I know i take some time to resoond a lot cause i have a big mouth and am bad about just typing the first thing that comes to mind. A lot of the time guys are trying to think of just the right thing to say. No offense.. but girls are weird.. to guys. We can say one thing and they be happy and laugh and then say something similar and they get mad and we dont know why. So were just makin sure we eliminate the possibility of a misunderstanding.
There are times my girlfriend complains that it takes me forever to respond to chat/texts.
I'm playing games. I'm "busy". LOL.
I do read them though - incase it's an urgent thing/emergency. (calls are quite expensive here and their internet is not that reliable to use calls).
Doesn't mean I love her less.
It CAN mean something but most of the time, no, it doesn't, and you certainly can't overthink this or you'll drive yourself crazy. Like you've pointed out already, there could be all kinds of reasons for it that have nothing to do with you at all.
If I dont respond right away, it doesn't mean I dont like you, it means I like myself a little bit more. You cannot expect to be persons number one priority right away, it takes earning (and is otherwise red flag when you imediately become number one).
In fact, I chat with a girl that I respond almost imediately to, but I dont like her in romantic way.
As someone who takes ages to respond I can tell you it is 99% of the time I was busy. Occasionally it's I don't like the conversation... But that's super rare.
If I don't like someone I generally don't talk to them. If you're talking in a romantic sense I would say it's not a sign he likes you but not necessarily a sign he doesn't.
sometimes when a girl texts me and I don't know what to text back that will make me seem cool or attractive, I don't text for a bit because I want to think up something that doesn't sound dumb or weird.
He might be playing hard to get. You should do the reverse. If you don't respond immediately, he might start responding more frequently. However... if that doesn't work he's either not interested or really busy all the time.
Taking too long to reply is actually one of the #1 signs that a guy is uninterested or is losing interest. Someone who claims to be "too busy" to text back is essentially saying that you're not a priority. No one is that busy that they can't take out 5 minutes to text you.
People today expect instant gratification. Nobody is entitled to spend every free minute they have replying to you. Give people some space. It doesn't mean they don't like you just cause they're chill about replying.
I don't think you should base anything on this - as sometime people are busy or sometimes just forgot to reply - I've even done that and not intentionally.
Anyone who has time to write thoughtful answers to 50 texts a day is either retired or unemployed.
Don't worry about it. My crush sometimes doesn't reply to me and he likes me. Guys aren't like females, what we see as important and meaningful, they don't.
depends on the guy. I had this one boyfriend who always took like 20 or 30 minutes (sometimes longer) between each message cause he didn't think it was a big deal. I pointed it out (didn't make a big deal just asked why he always took so long) and he said he just didn't check his phone a lot and after he realised it bothered me a little he started to answer faster
Guys are hella forgetful. Tbh, he probably read it forgot to respond. last thing you wanna seem is desperate, so go back in with a flirtatious nature. Try not to talk about your life or friends too much if possible. let him talk about his interests and be active in asking about them.
Wouldn't know for guys, but i typically respond soon to everyone. Then again the girl i like, who also likes me takes up to 48 hours to respond, not because she doesn't want to. She just doesn't use her phone a lot and forgets too look.
Don't stress too much about it
No, if either side likes you the response is quick. When a guy or girl takes a while to respond you are not the main person they are dealing with at the time... she's too busy responding to other guys
Yes, it also means nothing when he doesn't take long to respond. You are taking cues from something that is so Vague. Why the f would anyone point out the "time they took to respond to your msgs"? 14 forever in mind but not in body.
Yep just because a person doesn't reply straight away doesn't mean they are ignoring you. They will be a reason behind it.
Your friend doesn't know much about guys it would seem.
Sorry the mobile site here decided i was done posting.
Guys do have lives outside of the phone. But also if a guy really likes you they generally take their time responding sometimes because they are thinking of how to word themselves so they don't screw up by saying something that could be taken the wrong way.
If they take a while to respond don't worry about it. If they don't bother to respond at all you might have a different situation at hand.
Besides, should you expect a guy to snap sh*t and jump at your every beck and call immediately just to prove he likes you? I wouldn't want my partner to be like that. Sounds a little controlling to me as well as I come off as untrustworthy if I expect that.
he probably wants it to seem like he has stuff to do, possibly because he likes her
if I'm not together with a guy and he doesn't reply i shouldn't care.
but if it would be my boyfriend and he ignores me like for 1 day.. that would be NG
Depends what does he say of value and how lengthy are his texts?
Literallt means nothing. Im the worst texter in the world even if I love her.
sometimes it means nothing and he is just busy with other things but it is possible that he has other reasons not to answer sooner
if a girl takes long to respond that means nothing, right?
Depends how long. Men, like myself, that have priorities don't just sit around waiting for someone's text.
Most guys have been taught that it's "clingy" to reply to soon and that we shouldn't look desterate. Some guys take this way too far lol.
It's okay if it happens a couple of times but if it becomes an patron no its wrong and he knows it. I think he's not that interested then
He is probably chatting to other women. Maybe not...
maybe he hasn't had time
How long are we talking? An hour? Few hours? Days?
yeah... if a guy takes a long time to text he is ignoring you.
I've taken a very long time to reply... almost a day. I definitely care, it's just sometimes it can be impractical to check my phone.
Sometimes people do however try playing mind games. Waiting longer to increase the others anxiousness to hear back. Personally, it's best just to text when you can without having your eyes glued to your phone.
What constitutes as a "long time"?
Sometimes it takes me days to respond lol
How long is long?
" playing " it cool
sometimes this is me
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