Teasing? Really?

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

I was with friends at uni the other day and a girl passed by and said hello to us (I know her). one of my male friends winked at the other guy (I'm less close with him but he is in the group of my friends) and smiled and repeated the whole act one more time. I asked what happened and they went she likes him. I asked how they could be sure and they said she tries to see him and talks to him. I asked the guy 'oh, really?' and the guy replied 'yes' with a smile. Then, I said maybe she comes more to see you, or maybe over a coffee or any excuse. Then he said stop to me that he is uncomfortable in an aggressive way. I caught off-guard due to the his attitude and I said I was just joking and he shouted don't joke to me again. (Actually I was trying to be sympathetic to the situation and happy for them; as we all do when friends shared good stuff such as going to the uni so saying u can get more opportunities; meeting a variety of people etc. what I really mean is kinda 'daydreaming' with them or being hopeful for positive together, I don't know the term and I couldn't defend myself there against hşm when he was extremely rude).

So, I wanna ask did I come off as teasing/making fun of him? I can't really get why he got angry.

Also, why is saying that someone likes our friend in a jovial tone considered as teasing for the desired person specifically? I mean how 'hey the guy fancies you' is offensive or humiliating for the directed person God's for sake? I really can't wrap my head around.

Moreover, I shared with my older sister and she told me it's playground stuff and in the future these kinda behavior might cause me troubles with people in different social settings. Unfortunately, I can't understand this much cuz she didn't elaborate. Can you guys elaborate for me as my third question? Thanks in advance for any answer.

[IMuser]

1. He is probably embarassed about that (Self esteem issues)
2. He probably got rejected by her (he may have confessed to her sometime or maybe they had an argument)

What your sister means is as follows: "unless it's a close one, don't talk about relationships/crushes. It's like intruding their privacy."

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

I guess.. but if they talk near me while we were talking as a group isn't it weird thinking that way? it is kinda like excluding.. how can I know it's a taboo topic for him.. weird expectation
what do you mean about no.1 I have never got embarrassed couldn't get it much

[IMuser]

1. Not everyone is like you. Some topics which are normal for you can be taboo for them (and vice versa)
2. Talking in a group really doesn't indicate how "close" you are. I very well agree that his reaction was a little too intense however inam trying to explain what your sister said (as a rule of thumb, prefer to talk about someone's relationship when they specifically share something with you, like if a friend of yours were to confide to you about his relationship problems, you have the full right to ask for details. Otherwise, i prefer that you don't)

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

I agree. in my opinion, the any topic might be taboo for any person but if they open the topic you don't question at all if you see what I mean. That's why I always respond within the same extent whatever they share. But to be framed as like nosey or intruder or whatever is bad. (I mean I really don't care about their business) But I know what you mean and totally agree.
My question was about embarrasment.. I guess that's why people are feeling tat they are teased. Otherwise I can't see how it's humiliating thing to hear someone fancies you.
I can't get it cuz we are not 15 to be embarrassed. what you mean by self-esteem issues

[IMuser]

Maybe an inner monologue of "she is too good for me, i am a burden on everyone, i don't deserve her" and other negative talk. His embarassing reaction is something i consider unique to him, however since he was offended (for whatever reason), don't pick the topic again

Makes sense?

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

yes very unique, I have never seen that crazy and manipulative. Ofc, I have no intention. Cheers;)

[IMuser]

Yeah 👍

[LegendaryIcon]

FUCK THIS MHO

[ohshee]

Yes I dont understand that if it would have happen to me and my friend was there she would have ask the girl yo sit with us and then she would have told the girl all about me nut in a fun way my friends know I need know help and we all would have been laughing

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

not friendly at all yes even i was

[ohshee]

I love to laugh and sometimes . sometime I like to be a smart ass lol and sometimes I might say something and most people will laugh they understand what I was trying to say but then every once in a while there will be one person it will go over their head they will not get it they will not understand and they get upset. Once you explain it to them they will lap two most of the time LOL but not always I think you were just trying to be kind and funny

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

yeah if they don't understand it is annoying but being blamed and scolded..
I don't know how to defend myself for this

[ohshee]

Its something so pretty you shouldn't have to defend yourself for any reason you didn't do anything wrong

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

hmmm I don't know, i think i was portrayed kinda intruder of their privacy with my comments

[Tamales3]

I wouldn't have considered that teasing. But maybe he was embarrassed or had some bad recent experiences with that girl or similar situations.

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

I really don't get being embarrassed about it..

[Wise4myage]

Take your sisters advice.

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

yeah ofc why not but that is not my question.. I just want to know the thought process behind it.

[LegendaryIcon]

No such thing as "male friends"

I GUARAN FUCKING TEE IT

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

what do you mean?

[LegendaryIcon]

there is no such thing as having male friends

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

so how this is relevant now the the topic

[LegendaryIcon]

because it gives you insight in how to handle the "relationship"

[Raperonzolo_Viv]

I am so sorry but I cannot understand you fully