Complicated feelings? How does he really feel?

[Anonymous]

(Just to start I am married but things are complicated and although we have tried to cut ties a few times we have kids and keep trying to make it work) Any way I met a man through work just over 2 years ago and we became friends quite easily and have always got on. We often talk on the phone and have been for a couple of drinks here and there together and with other work people. We will often talk on the phone for 20-40 mins here and there and really get on and he has also supported me through some work issues and the odd moan about home life. Last year I had a full melt down and told him I had feelings for him. He sort of brushed it off said we were friends and I thought he might back off but he still called and always makes time to speak to me 2 -3 times a week. However the more I spoke to him the more I liked him and I really struggled to deal with my feelings. If he would ignore my texts it hurt my feelings. He often ignores my texts and leaves me unread, however will always return my calls. He very rarely rang first and I think only once or twice in 2 years text first! However there have been the odd occasions. Anyway I’ve recently tried to take a step back as I just can’t work out what he wants from me. We have the best conversations and so much in common but then he can just ignore my messages for days! So I backed off! But since I started backing off he’s started liking posts on Facebook (never did this before) and calling me 1-2 a week “just thought I would check in, we haven’t spoke in a while” We hadn’t spoken for a week and he called to “check in” then an hour or so later I’ve sent him a message about something to make conversation and he hasn’t even opened the message! (WhatsApp) Yet he’s been online on and off loads since! I’m just confused. What is this game?

[serious]

You said you are married but you are giving this other guy way too much attention and this guy seem to care or give you much time.

No matter what is going on in your marriage this is not correct, an in what you are doing. If you wish to pursue any man then first you should end your current relationship. That is the most ethical and logical thing to do.

For the other guy, clearly he is not interested. He is just playing mind games with you and I am sure you would not want to be with someone who is inclined to play mind games with you.

It is your life so you have to think and take your decisions. The most logical one.

If you can can make your marriage work then do that and if you cannot then end your marriage and then do what you want. By doing what you are doing now you are making things more complicated than what they are. You are creating problems for yourself.

That's all I can say. Wish you the best.

[Guy13]

Master manipulator and you are going to be so disappointed when you learn grass is not greener.
Hopefully, your husband will receive you back after your discovery of “no better” is finished.

[Avicenna]

He is worried about you, but knows it isn't a good idea to date a married woman

[Anonymous]

Being a man, he probably doesn't have a clue either.

[Iron_Man]

You have no business talking to other guys you are married

[Asker]

Fully understand this opinion unfortunately things are not always black and white :)

[Iron_Man]

You control your own destiny. You’re married they’ll shall not commit adultery.

[Asker]

I mean I haven’t lol! Talking isn’t having intercourse with someone. Essentially I’m trying to find out this person’s intentions not sleep with him! :)

[Iron_Man]

It starts out with talking then dating. Then It leads into premarital sex.

[Iron_Man]

Not premarital sex adultery