Cold approaching in the gym

Question

I was working out today and almost tempted to cold approach in the gym but I keep having the thought in the back of my head that girls don't like being approached in the gym after reading that they don't feel attractive because they can be sweaty and such. The thing is I feel very confident in my workouts and it's an optimal time for me in my opinion mentally.

Any suggestions? I would really like to meet a girl into exercise. One asked me to a bar once but I didn't feel any attraction to her. I go to the gym enough to the point where I know the regulars and now that new years hit we're getting crowded with all the "new years resolutioners."

JanJan · Accepted Answer

It's nice that you are picking up on what women are saying about the gym. It shows that you are willing to do you research. And I agree with what you are saying. When I go to the gym, I am not there to socialize. It's a chore, just like grocery shopping. I am there to get something done. If I wanted to socialize that the gym, I would have brought a friend with me. However, some women are different, and if you find a chatty woman at the gym, go ahead and talk to her! But women who have headphones in or are busy with a task should be left alone.

There are women out there who are interested in what you call "cold approaches", but not as many as you might think. I'm not very impressed by a man who approaches me simply because he likes what he sees, especially if I'm doing something compromising (such as working out or stretching). It's one thing to strike up a conversation with a stranger and get their number because they are interesting, but to walk across a gym simply because a woman is attractive will give her the impression that you are going to ask for her number regardless of what her personality is like. So her looks are basically the most important thing... Or at least that's what an action like that implies. If I see a man walking across the gym, I know exactly what to expect. "Oh hey, nice runners. Bla, bla bla... Can I have your number?" 9 times out of 10, I know exactly why the man has approached me, so the conversation seems less genuine, and more of a way to get to the bottom line. On the other hand, if I am talking to a stranger for whatever reason, and he seems genuine, then I am more likely to be responsive in giving my number if he asks. The difference is that I have to see that the interest in my personality was genuine, not just a premise to ask for my number. Hope this helps!

springdragonfly · Accepted Answer

I think it depends whether she is the type whose got her ugliest sweats on, is listening to music and not making eye contact while she works out or the kind in a cuter outfit, who actually looked at you once or twice.

I'd say don't bother anyone who hasn't even lifted their eyes to look at you. I'd also recommend you don't start with "you have a nice x" (where x is some body part).

Better to say something about the amount of energy she has, her smile, etc. Something that doesn't make it sound like you think she's a piece of meat. Unless of course that's the approach you are intentionally going for.

Also, be polite. Even if it is a new years resolution, she might stick around. So if things go badly between you two you might be stuck seeing her 3x a week.

musicbrain5 · Accepted Answer

I've been approached at the gym before and it was always by guys close to my age so it's never been creepy or anything. If you feel that it's an optimal time for you to approach someone, you'll be more confident and it will be easier for you to make your intentions clear. Some girls think that guys who approach them at the gym are only looking for one thing. So make sure you convey that you're interested in getting to know her, so she doesn't assume that you just want to get into her pants.

If you get turned down, well that sucks. But it also gives you another opportunity to go up to someone else. I turn these gym guys down because I am taken (I don't wear my ring at the gym), but that's just how things are sometimes I guess.

arashmenalagha · Accepted Answer

I asked a girl at the gym if I was hot. She was surprised I asked that.

Also, her boyfriend was there and I think he was pissy about me talking to her lol!

He put extra weights on my machine for me because of it. When I wasn't looking.

Yes, you should talk to them gym girls are actually nicer than people at school I feel like.

Danielp1989 · Accepted Answer

if you desire this women then DO IT. if the desire is not there DONT DO IT.

RATETUI · Answer

Girls don't like to be approached in the dark either, but if she's attracted to a man, she will make eye contact and smile, even in dark alleys. It always depends on how the female looks at you, not where it is. You can approach females in gyms, churches, hospitals, as long as she acknowledges your existance. Too many times, you see these pua approach women who didn't even look in the pua's direction. As a matter of fact, I see so many pua approach from behind, and the side. This is why they fail.

BrunetteNYC · Answer

I think it can be pretty easy actually since you are both some where a mutual interest has been established.  I'd find a gym where they had TV's on, like I been to one of those before, and then it'd be easy to do small talk from something on TV.  That's just one example of a non-creepy way to strike up a conversation.

kaylaS91 · Answer

Yea, I probably wouldn't be a fan of being approached by a guy at the gym especially if I had just gotten off the elliptical/bike and was a red, hot, sweaty mess.

Try just smiling at a girl a few times, and then maybe approach her before she does any cardio so she's still looking and feeling good.

Anonymous · Answer

I'd feel self conscious. I mean, since you'd see me working out and you asked me out, it would show that you liked what you saw. but I'd be worried that you only wanted to have sex with me. if you made your intentions clear, that you weren't looking just for sex, I'd totally give you a chance because I'd want a man who took as much care in staying fit as I do

XxNatashaxX · Answer

i'm not a big fan of it but its also not a big deal. the way I see it, If he's asking me out at the gym then he's already seen and accepted me at my worst so that's out of the way

Anonymous · Answer

Go for it. Just be friendly and not blatant about it.

Anonymous · Answer

girls don't like getting approached anywhere if you aren't good looking

Cold approaching in the gym

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