My girlfriend lies to me about to going to sleep, what to do?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend and I would be texting and she would say "I'm falling asleep, I'll sleep now" so she says goodnight and stops replying. However, one time after she did this, I logged onto our Netflix account and noticed she was watching something. The next day I asked her about it and she said she was sleeping, so I let it go that time but I told her that if she needs to do something she can just say "hey I'll do this and go to sleep, goodnight" instead of lying. This time she said the same thing that she's "very tired and can't keep her eyes open" and now I noticed her replying to posts on social media after that. I honestly don't understand why she does that especially when I caught her before and told her that it's fine if she wants to do something else she could just say that. Also my ex girlfriend would say "I'll be on instagram for a while until I fall asleep" and it never bothered me but the lying does bother me. Thoughts?

[yeolsb]

Well if you told her it’s ok if she wants to stop talking n do smth else than 1. She falls asleep while watching 2. Maybe she thinks that she’s gonna hurt your feelings (u know u might say like what? again u are watching this , u don’t wanna talk to me blah blah) 3. She needs some space for her own (she’s not supposed to tell her each and every move to u right rather she’s gonna feel controlled ) Out of this advice tell her that she’s losing ur trust and learn how to respect each other’s privacy, we all need it. Good luck !

[Asker]

Thanks for the kind wishes! I actually ended up talking about the subject without really mentioning that I "caught" her. I just asked her if she felt she needed more space to do her own things and stuff like that. I believe it worked out great, thanks again!

[yeolsb]

Happy to help ☺️

[OrionTheCat]

It kind of feels awkward, because you basically have to tell a guy that you'd rather be doing something else than talking to him, or that you're tired of texting. It's great that you're ok with it, but it still feels a bit awkward, especially if it's a new relationship. Maybe she doesn't like the idea of you checking what's she watching/liking/commenting (it's a bit stalker-ish) so she tells you she'll go to sleep just so you wouldn't check on her activities

[Asker]

That makes sense

[Anonymous]

Red flags, compulsive liar it seems. Start looking for someone else and then end it.

[taleets]

She probably just wants to chill and not text. I used to do this all the time

[Asker]

And I don't have a problem with that. Like I said, my ex would tell me "I'll surf fb/instagram and go to sleep" and I was completely fine with that. But my current girlfriend prefers lying than saying that, even when I caught her once before and told her it was fine if she told me she would just be on her phone chilling. I don't see a problem with wanting time to chill I just don't get why she would lie

[taleets]

She probably doesn’t want to be rude. I wouldn’t over think this as I seriously don’t see it as a big deal in any way shape or form

[taleets]

Don’t let something so minuscule drive you apart

[Asker]

You're totally right! Thank you. I actually kinda talked about it without really mentioning it. Like, I asked her if she felt she needed more space and stuff like that. It worked out great.