There are 3 possible reasons I can think of:
1. They were never your friend. They just occupied the friend space in your life. Either because you put them there through your responses to their romantic advances or because they never found enough confidence to make those advance probably again due to the way you behave when interacting with them. There’s nothing wrong with the way you behave around them it’s just a unspoken subconscious miscommunication between the two of you. They wanted more but accepted that friendship is all they could get from you right now. So when someone new came to take their romantic attention away from you they stopped trying to get your attention as much because actual progress was being made with this new person. But you’ll only see it as a friend not reaching out to you as much.
2. The new girl feels uncomfortable with your relationship with him. She may not verbally say it. She may seem super cordial and nice around you but somewhere at some point in time he got the impression that his girlfriend doesn’t like the closeness between you two and he values his new relationship’s potential more than his relationship with you. Which on the surface sounds shitty but you have to remember that he’s not choosing her over you he’s choosing what she could be over you which is an entirely made up fantasy in his head which he’s hoping she can help make real. You’ll almost always lose to someone’s fantasies because fantasies are perfectly tailored to them. It could actually be a combo of this and reason 1 and usually is
3. He’s overly engrossed in his new relationship. Ask around, has he disappeared from all his friend groups or just you? If it’s all of his friends then chances are he’s just let his new relationship consume his life. Some people just do this. I personally don’t think it’s a good sign for a relationship but many people make their new relationship such a priority that they cease to maintain their other social ties. These people in my opinion usually end up feeling loneliness more than the average person because they have no close support network after a break up to keep them from feeling the full weight of loneliness. Which creates a perpetual cycle of overly investing super early in new relationships, ditching friends, and feeling so lonely post break up that it encourages them to cling harder to the next new relationship.
Im sure there are more reasons but these are the reasons I see to see most often.
ignoring you completely ha? hmmm... maybe these guys were not seeing you as just a "friend".
what kind of a relationship did you have with these guys before they got their gf? were they interested in you, did they happen to say it or do you have any reasons to believe that there might have been an interest from their side?
Asking because the only reasonable argument that I can find would be: they liked you, they tried one way or another, realized it's not going anywhere , they still liked you nonetheless, they suffered inside, then eventually tried to move on. When they made the step and got a girlfriend, they shut you down because they did not feel comfortable having you around and maybe you were still on their mind.
Happened to notice that with girls that are all giddy and friendly around me. Most of times I can easily figure some want more, but I just act as friendly and make no steps if not interested. No leading on, no stupid games.
The moment they get a boyfriend, not only they stop communicating, but when I'm trying to keep up with them (because in all fairness they were great girls to be around and I appreciate every single one of them one way or another), they barely reply to messages, if they do, they reply with closed sentences (nothing to make the conversation going).
It's like they never knew you.
And it does hurt a bit isn't it to see that someone you got along with doesn't want to share life with you as a friend.
Could be it feels weird for that person to be friends with you when he has a girlfriend. Could be the girlfriend is easily threatened by other girls or in some other way has made him not want to hang out with other girls. It could depend a lot on the nature of your friendship too - if you're a flirty person or you make dirty jokes together, etc.
Of course it could also be that the guy has had some interest in you before or feels like he has been flirty with you, and because of that doesn't want to engage when he's found someone.
It's hard to say without knowing the people involved.
Girlfriends being jealous/uncomfortable is a pretty common factor though, honestly.
Thats what happen when u get in a relationship its kinda normal and should be expected ( well i expect it) i remember one friend didn't talk to me for a whole year because her relationship and when we did speak i felt some way because it seem like now that her relationship was bumpy she could reach out to vent... i told her and she apologized but still i would never do that to my friend i would balance both because u gotta remember they was there before he/she was
But if u have a very clingy u dont need friends type of person in a relationship then trying balance both will be very difficult especially if they feels as thou u don't need nobody but them
Well it’s often the case they stop talking to their guy friends as well but I think there are a number of reasons.
- just more busy, less time
- they can be respecting the boundaries of their new relationship
- one of the reasons they were friends with the girl to begin with was that they were interested in them as more than friends and they no longer have that interest
- some other unrelated random thing that happened
- they don’t want people to know much about their new relationship
Not saying these things are true for your case but I’m sure all of these things have happened
My guess would be that it's at the request of their new girlfriend. Either that or they don't wanna disrespect this girlfriend and willingly cut ties for a while until they get the girlfriend's approval. I went through a similar experience when my best guy friend started dating this girl and she felt insecure at the thought of the two of us hanging out alone even though our friendship is completely platonic. I ended up meeting the girl and we became really good friends afterwards so she stopped caring that her boyfriend and I hung out :) Just removing yourself as a "threat" helps a lot :)
Respect. I mean I wouldn't stay friends with a guy who had a girlfriend unless he was a childhood friend or really close friend. And even then I would have to become friends with her. I mean I'm not saying I would ignore the guy in the street but I certainly wouldn't hang out with him one on one anymore. So its really just respectful if the guy backs off from female friends and vice versa when taken. Or at least, if its a close friend, have them make friends with the girlfriend and only see them when she us there or in group situations from then on.
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Uh, because their girlfriend is more important. When you don't someone then that person is your main focus. I wouldn't say they ignore their female friends but it's natural to be less to distant, male or female.
I think it boils down to how they saw you. Maybe they saw you as something that could never stay only friendly, but had to evolve to a romantic level for them to be interested. I have friends that are girls that that i can NEVER go romantic with. It just isn't there. I have friends that I always feel like I want to chase/evolve with, and I have friends where both are okey. It's hard to say, but my in the past, with some girls, I just lose interest if we can't evolve, while with others I'd rather just be friends and hang out. I've been friends with a girl where it was obvious that there were some level of attraction, but we both had a girlfriend/boyfriend. In the end it just got awkward and we just stopped being friends. Now we rarely speak. I dont know why, its just how it is.
They don't necessarily ignore. They just have a big social expense the have to spend their social capital on. To complicate things, like myself, a lot of guys I personally know need time alone time.
A lot of women do that. It's not just a matter of female friends, but also female relatives. One of my sisters is married and has 4 kids with ages ranging from 14 to 4. I don't even expect her to swing by to hang out. If anything, I'd he doing her a favor if I come visit her and help them with the house and kids.
It's nothing personal. It's just a fact of life. It's similar to single folks getting upset with their married friends who have kids.
Time is limited. It's hard to regularly meet everyone in your social circle. So it's inevitable that a guy will deprioritise seeing a platonic girl friend over one that he gets to see naked, have sex with, and enjoy fun, flirty vibes with one once he's in a relationship. Guys ditch their guy friends, family too over a girl etc so don't get butthurt over it, that's life.
Also consider he may have been wanting to date you but you weren't showing interest back or he was hanging out with you as social proofing to other girls that he is a high quality guy to date. So once he finds a girl to date, you have lost value to him.
Well if it's any comfort to you, it had happen to me too, with at least 1-2 female friends, when they get someone, but there was some female friends who stop talking with for other reasons. There is three possible reasons for why your former male friends did that. One reason is that they was fake friends, and was friends with you only in hope of getting some. Second reason is that their girlfriend is overjealous, and she forced them to cut off their friendship with you. The third and most reasonable reason is that they simple don't have enough time for you any longer, and it's makes sense that they would spend most of their free time on their girlfriend instead of their female friend, a girlfriend is usually more important then a female friend, and you can't even call an 'bros before hoes' on that. :)
Two major reasons.
1. Because the girlfriend is jealous, and she pushes the issue.
2. Because they were never really the girl's friend in the way she thought they were in the first place.
I don't mean to imply that all male / female friendships are insincere, and superficial, because I do not believe this to be the case. But some are.
Most of the time, when you get a girlfriend, she will evaluate and go through your inventory of your friends who are female; and then express usually in indirect suggestive ways, like her opinion of them, and often it’s a negative opinion if she feels that girl is a threat to her. They often don’t even think there is a threat of cheating, but other threats she perceives, like an emotional connection or bond, that she may think exist between you, that she may be lacking, between her boyfriend, so she will then tell you “I think her clothes are tacky and saw her once eat with her mouth open and gossip about you”
You have to understand; girls are fucking complicated
There are a few possible reasons. Maybe your guy friend wanted more than friendship with you so he feels like he's cheating by being with you. Maybe his new lady is the jealous, controlling type (yeah, those come in female too) and she doesn't allow him to see you. Early in the relationship, a lot of people over-invest their time in a new love interest, ignoring family and friends all the same. If that's the case, he probably doesn't even realize he's doing it. If both relationships are normal and healthy, he'll eventually come around. In the end, if you really need to know his reasoning, if there is any, you'll have to ask him. Not sure you could bet on a straight answer though.
I don't know but it's stupid. Like y'all are friends I'll never get how a girlfriend/boyfriend changes that.
My male best friend and I have girlfriends and hang out because friends are a thing and if you're the type to drop them for a romantic relationship on a dime, you shouldn't be dating.
I'm not sure of the reasons in your case, but I had one situation where my new girlfriend was very jealous of a female friend I had. That friendship was purely platonic and always had been, but my new girlfriend was jealous of how close we were and also my friend was acting kind of weird like she was jealous of me having a girlfriend so I think that only made my girlfriend more suspicious.
I tried to find a way to manage to keep both relationships but in the end felt like I had to make a choice and I chose my girlfriend.
A few years later, things settled down and we were all able to be friends, but unfortunately it did significantly reduce the friendship I had from close friends to casual friends that rarely see each other.
Maybe something similar is happening in your case?
It goes both ways. It's cause the guys/girls have no backbone and they're the settlers in the relationship. I've had girlfriends end year long friendships just to date an abusive cheating boyfriend. One time, one girl was in the hole 20k and I'm like if you break up with him I'll wipe out your debt. No strings attached since she was a friend. She declined and after chatting casually her boyfriend went on her phone n said we can't talk anymore. She obliged and now is out a multimillionaire friend. She's dating someone new now but not worth my time even thinking about her. From updates though, I was told she owes 40k now.
The girlfriend will always feel threatened to some degree, even if she doesn't admit it, and will try to keep her guy from communicating with his girl friends... in worst case scenario she is jealous and insecure... if the guys smart he'll steer clear of his girl friends... Because i'm sure he'd feel the same if she was wanting to hang out with her guy friends... so I think out of mutual respect you just don't kick it with your friends of the opposite sex when engaged in a relationship... maybe once in a while you could possible if you brought your partner with you
Because they are trying to keep their girlfriend. yes ignoring other friends just because they are female is wrong. But let's face it a lot of women get jelious and tell their boyfriend's not to talk with other women but them ! One can still have a girlfriend/boyfriend and still keep talking with friends. Just keep in mind there's your partner and then then there's your friends. Ignoring friends is a good way to end or destroy a good friendship. So if your partner is the jelious type let them know that they don't need to be and you are not going to loose a friend because of jellious thoughts or feeling
Because women are high maintenance, and men know that, because we want men to prove their worth to us before we do the do..
Nobody of the opposite sex should be considered a friend. It sounds harsh, but you're not gonna make many friends, and you're gonna break your heart if you make friends with a potential friend +1
Usually it’s the girlfriend. They’re possessive and don’t want them around other girls.
That being said there are some girls my husband has cut out since dating me because they would a) pretend I didn’t exist when being a guest in our home b) obviously flirt with my husband in front of me c) openly treat me like crap because they were jealous because he refused to date them d) their kids are terrors.
Most likely he’s doing it out of respect for his current girlfriend also I’m sure in the beginning of the relationship he’s more so infatuated with her and wants to give her more of his time when he three and everything out with other girls that are his friends and not you specifically it’s probably because he actually has more feelings for you than he should if he’s in a relationship now.
One reason is because their girlfriend objects , and the guy doesn't want to jeopardize his relationship
I used to be friends with this one guy, and his girlfriend was jealous of our friendship. It was a platonic relationship. Always was. But his girlfriend felt threatened and insecure about our friendship. So our friendship ended. I was okay about it coz I wouldn't want to come between a guy and his girlfriend. I'd put my relationship with my boyfriend first too
I lol'd at this question. Because they're not "friends" with those females. They want to get into their pants =P If they have a new girlfriend then they don't need to be friends with those other girls lol. They have achieved their goal.
Duhhhhhhh!!!
It could be that they dont want their girlfriend to get jealous or it could be thAt they were attracted to you and put in the friend zone so when they got their own girlfriend, the appeal of hanging with you changed.
Because humans are pretty much incapable of having just being friends with the opposite sex. We are built to react to attraction and even if your able to ignore temptation and keep a friendly healthy relation with your friends your partner will more than likely become a jealous mess.
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