How many "dates" would you go on before you would want a relationship commitment?

Question

If all the dates went well... how many dates would you go on before you ask (or expect to be asked) to be exclusive?

Goodwifie · Accepted Answer

I'd say after the first kiss.
I kissed my husband after our second date, it was a way to tell him that I was interested in him. I've never had the conversation of are we exclusive with any of my boyfriends.
I don't really like this game of are we steady or not. My friend dated a guy for 6 months and then she found out that he was dating other women but because she didn't state that she wanted to be exclusive with him he thought it was OK to mess around. Sure it can be seen as being her fault to some people but surely six months of being with her and he was still seeing other women, come on 😠.
I've always just put all of my effort into getting to know one person at a time.

Kydill13 · Accepted Answer

This is such a hard thing to really set a hard “deadline.” Everyone is different and it depends on age and maturity in many ways as well. I’ve dated before my boyfriend and I knew within a few dates that things would not work out. I would say however many dates it takes, with my boyfriend it took us about 3 weeks of dating before becoming “official.” It felt right and I knew it was the right decision. Listen to your gut, b honest and communicate with your partner. It will come 😊

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

It's hard to put in to a "number of dates", but probably at least 5-10. Really, it depends more on my "interviewing" her and what her answers are, plus observing her in different situations to make sure that her words match her actions. I figured out long ago that you can't change other people, so it's critically important to choose wisely at the very beginning.

How long that process takes is going to vary, but it's probably going to be at least a month or two of time, and a LOT of discussion. And often, those discussions will reveal serious incompatibilities, which means we go our separate ways or define limits to our expectations and don't intend to become "serious."

ImSoSquishy · Accepted Answer

fuck dating and relationships! i'm skipping all the steps! i'm taking a drunk chick from a random bar to sign marriage papers at las vegas baby! just kidding lmao.

usually 5 to 10 dates, i've actually asked a filipina girl to be my girlfriend after our first date back in 2013, she said yes but turns out she just wanted to be with me for a green card and so we broke up.

Sociopathvictim · Answer

i hold strong values and for me it's not about a relationship commitment after dates, it's from the beginning of friendship. Holding a line between Dating and a relationship is where it goes wrong and how cheating occurs. Anyone who dates another whilst they are in a friendship with you and showing interest, they are showing to be fake and you shouldn't trust them at all. People who ignore the signs will be cheated on.

Kurαȷ · Answer

I don't date multiple people.
If I'm interest in someone, I will give them my full interest and attention so we can mutually determine whether it is going to work out or not.

I don't ever entertain the possibility of interacting with someone else, and if I find out the other person does, the interaction is over.
I personally don't believe in being interested in multiple people, and I'm not compatible with those who do.

AynonOMouse · Answer

I would expect to be exclusive after the third date. Nobody needs to ask.
But if I agreed to go on a second date with someone, I wouldn't be seeing anyone else either. After 3 dates we should know if we want to have a relationship, or end it and move on.

infp_libra_78 · Answer

You talk about expectations around the 3rd date. By then you know if you like them or there is chemistry. I've always needed to be sexually monogamous, but I have openly dated a few girls at once. Last time it was hot and heavy with one, but just 1-2 dates with other girls before I committed.

ATuairiscean · Answer

I would look more for the connection and when it felt right. For exclusive nearly straight away no more than one or two. For serious dating I would start looking at things closely in that 3 to 6 month period - Settling down maybe after 18 months to 2 years.

GingerGuy · Answer

It depends how well we "click" and if I feel the connection. Dates can go well, but maybe still don't feel a connection. And it's different with everyone, so there's not number set in stone. Also depends if I'm looking for a relationship to begin with or not. It could be the first date or two, or longer or never.

gizzmo1 · Answer

Well i believe that if both of you are happy with the way things are, then take things slow, dont rush love. If your partner, gender neutral, is urging you to have sex with them, then you maybe they are not the right person for you. If what you are looking for is a purely sexual relationship, then that's different, but if your looking for real love, take your time, there is no need to rush

iarlaith_ · Answer

None? three? Five? There is no proper answer because every part of people is different like I have asked people out and then we've gone on dates but then people can be a thing but not "going out " for ages before one of them asks the other. If this is a personal question, then I would advise that you give it 3, and then ask them yourself.

sh_awesome · Answer

Dating is done to know a person well specially on emotional level ( physical level is irrelevant), as long as you get to know likes/dislikes. So this can happen even on your first date or more. Once you're comfortable with each like you're having fun and enjoying you can move to next level.

Hurlyburly · Answer

Well personally I never really dated so I went pretty straight from a friendship into a commited relationship every time. Therefore I would say... one? xD

SaintJonesy · Answer

I only date one person at a time. I don't have the energy or even the interest for more than one, but pretend in my head that I'm dating more than one, because if you don't show a woman she means nothing to you, then you mean nothing to her.

SjE78 · Answer

Probably between 3 and 5 but usually if things go well on first date I tend not to date anyone else other than the one I would be dating at that time... rather keep it simple and focus everything on one woman tbh

charlzinut · Answer

I didn’t go on any dates with my current boyfriend, I met him in Australia and he went back to Japan but we have been talking ever since, I never needed a date to be in a relationship with someone.

Joshua789 · Answer

Really I would have to know more about the girl before I could give a good answer. But if we like each other a lot, I might kind of hint around a bit and if I got a good feeling about it, I'd ask her what her feelings were about commitments.

witherwing · Answer

I'd consider the time we've known each other more than how many dates have been in that time period. So after about a month of dating I would bring up exclusivity.

JustCallMeLeon · Answer

I assume that someone shouldn't date multiple people trying to decide. When you date someone, you clear things up. You either continue or inform its not gonna work and that its over.

User-Jacob · Answer

It's super dependent on the individual and our circumstance. Usually, I'd say it takes around a month. But if you're sure, it could be much less - and if you're not, it may take longer.

garyfrost · Answer

I met my current partner via a chat room close to 15 years ago. We chatted twice then we met twice. First was Friday night. Just going out for some fun and the next thing was a sleep over on Sunday. I sold my house and we are still together. So what you decide is the number you need. If you're wrong then you'll find out during the relationship. In the meantime you can have the best time of your life.

MusicMayhem · Answer

I wouldn't accept being in a relationship before at least 4-5 dates. Before that she's too desperate to get a boyfriend and trying to get a label for status or to hide her fear of being single.

William-Davidson-Jr · Answer

One, I won't go out with any woman unless it's been established before hand the we are just friends.
I'm a loyal and serious man, I don't like having my time wasted and I won't waste any woman's time either.

Pejtu · Answer

before i was with my girlfriend officially we had 2 dates if u can use terms like date  we are together for 3 months

PrincessPie · Answer

Time is more of a factor than dates for me, plus if there is a connection i'd rather sooner than later.

pumaOH24 · Answer

I would think after 3-5 dates that you could tell if thing were heading towards a serious relationship and if you were compatible.

Anonymous · Answer

It's not about how many dates, it's about how you met & how it's done. my boyfriend and I began our relationship on the night of our first ever date. But we were already just friends for a month or so. So it was great and comfortable.

dipta · Answer

That would depend on how long we had known each other prior to starting dating.

rjroy3 · Answer

At this stage in my life, I'm not confident I'd get into a 100% monogamous relationship any time soon.

melanieeeB · Answer

Depends totally on the vibe, the personalities and feelings

Anonymous · Answer

Always thought this topic was pretty stupid.  I would only ask the girl or say yes to her, if I actually wanted a future relationship with her. People act like they are test driving a car.

Twizzlee · Answer

Date 3-10 depending on how I feel towards them and how spaced apart the dates are

sp33d · Answer

To me, it's not a matter of 'how many dates it takes'. Such a decision would take months for me to sink in. Besides, I don't date with the ironclad intention of commitment (think about this for a bit).

Northern_star · Answer

its fascinating and bizarre on the same hand that people nowadays dont have a default setting of seeing one person exclusively at a time and wait for what happens..

SGL69 · Answer

The way I am myself if the date went well on the first date I wouldn't date anyone else. I'd already be committed myself. That's just me.

Anonymous · Answer

I don’t think the number of dates matter but time does. For me it’s more about months. Maybe two months of dating and getting to know someone.

BigRob420 · Answer

I don't count dates. Usually they just ask me after our first sexual experience together.

chrisbigman · Answer

It depends on the two people, but to be "official" I would say after about 10 dates would we announce.

TheBestUsername · Answer

It seems like a lot of G@Gers (such as in this question) make a lot of unrealistic assumptions about relationships.

es20490446e · Answer

I expect to be exclusive from date two. I don't want to date with people seeing other people.

mishmishayezie · Answer

I would wait for at least 1 month and then talk about if we want to be exclusive

TheRealQuestion · Answer

If I go on a date with a girl, I won't be dating anyine else at the same time, they get all of my attention. Unless otherwise discussed.

Marinevet84 · Answer

3-5. On date number 5 last night, I asked my now girlfriend. It really depends on both people. I think causally bringing it up would be a good idea.

DamnMan · Answer

I don't think I care about the dates. Only, if they come over sometimes.

BHooper · Answer

Maybe 5 or until I have established a strong connection with the person.

lernulo · Answer

I dont have a number may be one, may be ten depends of many things

Daniel3035 · Answer

In this day and age? 50 minimum todays a goid day by the way.

Hoggy1 · Answer

25 to 30 dates singularly but for 1 person 5 or 6 for a serious bf/gf relationship

cutiebytheshore123 · Answer

I know the first date or 2nd date. I'm not gonna keep wasting my time o on dates. if he doesn't know then im on to the next one

iFarted · Answer

That choice would be determined by how i feel for her, not by the number of dates.

DaMack999 · Answer

90 days Max. After that were either having sex and a relationship or moving different paths.

ellamm · Answer

it is more like how many gambles you take... 3 enough i think

LuWe22 · Answer

It took me months. I really love him now so it was worth it to wait so long

monicasagi · Answer

I would like to date that person for about 3 months before getting into a relationship with him

Kissha_Kadsura · Answer

I believe in friendship before relationship... so however long it takes for the guy to be a friend. 🌷

john77b · Answer

Till you are both comfortable and confident that he is a perfect guy for you!

Merictanok · Answer

You either ask, or someone is confused after 3 dates.

bluejay1238 · Answer

Couldn't really give a number. Maybe a couple months depending on the relationship.

janphil93 · Answer

5 or more. You should at least know the person first before commiting.

TheKingOfKings · Answer

If you have the ability to judge the person then one date is enough

twiggy992 · Answer

It albdepends on the first date if thir was a connection or not

Anonymous · Answer

LoL, you think everyone wants to be in a relationship, i have no answer for this question.

pooper89 · Answer

After 1 to 2 months of dating.

How many "dates" would you go on before you would want a relationship commitment?

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