This is by far one of the most annoying things I've experienced. Male strangers tend to say:
“Why don’t you ever smile?” “Just smile for me.” “You’d look better if you smiled.” “Smile sweetheart.”
I can't for the life of me understand why? Why would you feel the need to say that to a complete stranger? By the way I know this does not imply to all men, but most girls complain about this and even get angry when men do this.
Gurl I get this from both sexes, men and women are always telling me to smile especially when im at work. I think people do this, cause they assume you're having a bad day and try to get you to smile, guys may do it cause they see a beautiful woman they like and want to be the reason why she smiles. But anyway i hate when people tell me to smile, that shit irks me to the core.
Like sorry, some people have a condition known as RBS aka resting bitch syndrome and I happen to be one of those people. Just cause im not smiling every 5 damn seconds doesn't mean I'm having a bad day or pissed off, it just means my face is resting. Everyone has a resting face, it's like these people are clueless about it and don't look at other people walking in the mall or outside for example. Everyone has a resting face, no one is walking around with a smile plastered on their face.
So what's the point of me smiling for no damn reason? I smile all the time, but i usually do it when I'm TALKING to someone or HEAR something funny. If you see a motherf*cka just walking down the street street smiling and laughing their head off and they aren't talking to someone or listening to something, you better fucking run cause that mean's that person done snapped and about to go postal. But yeah... stop asking random people to smile.. the shits annoying lol
I know, this happens to me. One time I was so tired, id traveled by bus, was up days... and this guy at the bus station, said SMILE... pissed me. I think men think women are suppose to be beautiful for them, and show their pretty smile always... like were not human or something... so annoying I agree.
Happened to me many times as well and I completely agree. I was with a friend at a coffee shop and a guy came up to me and told me to smile. Thought it was really weird. Everytime I said something he just responded with "just smile" over and over. He did not want to leave our table until I smiled. Eventually a waiter got him to leave us alone.
Yeah weird, it's like they think we live to give them an erection. I mean, if its their way of being friendly, cheering us,,, sweet... but it just comes off rude usually. It's like why do I have to smile sir? for all he knows I just lost my kid, or mother, or something... people don't think. I believe in trying to smile, and brave the storms of life, sure... but for random men to keep saying smile smile smile, yeah it's out of line.
Several reasons: It is a way to exert control. An unsmiling woman threatens them. A smiling woman looks submissive, sexually receptive, or both. So, tell the scary unsmiling woman to look sexually receptive, and you'll feel better about yourself.
Sooo cringey, I have seen that happen a few times lol. You dont tell people to smile, you make them smile by telling a joke or cheering them up somehow.
Before anything else, fuck the guys that say that! I remember a huge fuss being made about this when many asked Captain Marvel to smile more. Well to be fair her character could show some emotions at all like sadness, anger, happyness, something. But that was a movie where the characters are supposed to captivating to the audience. In real life women aren't here to look captivating to us! Yes, because that is the reason guys ask them to do that. To look nicer, to look happier when they are around, to look more approachable and easy, "me me me"! It works like a green light of aproval for some guys.
To be clear sometimes it can come from good intentions. A guy want to see a girl happy so he asks "Why aren't you smilling?" is like a "Is everything oukey?". But that is a lot different and said with a completely different tone.
I fully agree. Like you said it depends on how they say it and they have good intentions. But overall you're spot on. That's why if some random stranger in public asks this, I won't smile nor respond because those situations often turn into a negative situation
Because approaching is hard enough as it is for most men, doing so when you have to deal with a rbf is even more challenging.
Guys want to approach you girls, if we didn't we'd be single for life. Imagine how you'd feel in that situation? Pretty useless and shit right? So we just want to see a glimmer of interest to help us be more confident when hitting you up.
If you're not interested that's fine, tell us so and we'll be on our merry way, but don't begrudge us for wanting to meet someone that looks happy rather than negative and standoffish.
@MusicMayhem You clearly completely missed the whole point of my question. This about walking around in public doing whatever we are doing, and a random guy tells you to smile. Sometimes not once or twice, but many times. No one walks around with a big smile on their face while walking around or being out and public, just like you guys, us girls have poker faces. So it's not negative and standoffish.
Because for those guys is valid the outdated norm "girls have to be pretty and smile" 🙄. Although in my case it's my girlfriend the one who keeps saying to me I need to smile.
Obviously your girlfriend saying it is normal * it's only weird when someone approaches you out of nowhere and tells you to smile. Friends and family it's not a big deal
Oh God, good question. I always wondered that as well. I've had that happened to me a lot when I used to go to university.
I remember there was this guy that I had no idea who he was that would see me every morning and kept telling me to smile lol like dude, it is 8am, I'm tired as fuck and have to go to class, nothing to smile about lol
There are many reasons people say that, first one is he likes you and wants to make you happy but he sees he is not getting proper response from you so he tries to go directly in that way he get feeling he didn't blow up whole situation. Second and I think most common is that people have specific feelings which is called EMPATHY, COMPASSION he sense you are not in the good mood and wants to cheer you up because in some way they feel they are hurted too.
That's not something men just say to women. I've heard it too many times and it gets annoying. My natural face is serious. I don't smile and I can't force myself to smile, and yet people say i should smile more because i look too serious.
I have a saying I use. I say to my friends and family. It is smile your are beautiful, you are loved and you are cared for. Every one goes through things but the point of the saying is there are people who care for you and the desire is to bring hope to that person. Un your circumstance it can be annoying as it seems like all they are trying to do is to cheer you up or bring some joy to you.
It is so annoying when they say that. Like you can't approach me and then demanding me to smile buddy it's your job to make me smile! I love what the girls in the pic are doing I will do the same thing next time.
This is an interesting question to me because I've never seen it happen in real life. I'm guessing they see you're cute and unhappy and want to cheer you up, and are not very smooth.
I have never heard any man in real life say that to a woman, I hang out with people my age, and some older people too. But I might ask "what's so funny" if someone is smiling and I can't figure out why.
I've never been told this by a stranger but people I know have asked me to smile more. I have a natural resting bitch face but on the inside I'm a pretty happy person. I just think i look weird smiling for no reason. I guess they just think I'm angry or something.
Guys wouldn't like it if they were told to smile while having a bad day. Just because it's attractive to you, doesn't mean we have to do it, or they should tell us to.
Everyone wishes they could be always happy with a smile on they're face. You are the only one who allows your day to persist in a disastrous moment And about insinuating... how aren't you !!
Thats because they either want to see you happy and having a good time. Or they really like your smile a lot. The first encounter always involves a beautiful woman smiling. That is my guess.
This is something that happens to anyone who has a serious face. Other people find it odd that you aren’t smiling and will ask if you are upset or sad. I don’t know about anyone else but it’s one of my biggest pet peeves
It’s funny because constantly smiling is more of a American expectation. If you go to Berlin, strangers smiling at you would seem insane. You don’t need to wear your emotions on your sleeve, you look like a lunatic. And also, why smile if something’s wrong? Why mask the pain of this world, when you don’t want to do so yourself. If someone’s happy, they’ll smile.
It's a forecast of events to come, unsettling esp. when the beginning of a day or date. He is with you for fun & games, otherwise he would do something else.
I don't know why guys have the need to see a woman smile. I have a friend who, whenever sees me starts to joke and tease and when I smile he is all happy and says that nothing feels better than to make me smile with few words or a simple gesture
But this isn't about staring or glancing at someone. It's about you walking about doing things in public whatever it is. Meaning you are walking around in thought.
Of course we all look better smiling, it's weird and creepy if you're walking about thinking about what you must do for your day and someone comes up to you and tells you to smile.
How many men have come up to you and said this? Only include people you have never seen before in your life, are out of your social circle and wouldn't have any way of asking around about you.
If someone you know does it, it's probably out of a good intention. They mean well and may think at times you're feeling low. That being said let's get real. Do you really think asking someone to do something that takes a second, spreads happiness, promotes good feelings and makes you look good is that bad? Specially if it doesn't cost you anything? And do you seriously want me to believe you confronted these guys or told them it bothers you and they still ask you?
Granted, I should have specifically stated that it bothers me, "I don't want to" doesn't seem to cut it.
Smiling because someone told you to, does not give me happiness since it would be a fake smile. I don't care about looking good, I'm there to do my job, that's it. One instance was when I was just sitting on my forklift and doing some paperwork. This dude drives up next to me, asks me a question, and then says "smile". Or another instance when I was just minding my own business organizing some merchandise when this dude from afar asks me why I'm not smiling.
I don't know these people. We are not friends. We do not socialize. They are just a bunch of random dudes at my job.
The thing that people don't seem to understand is that some people just give off the look of feeling low. It's just the way our face naturally looks when it's relaxed. It doesn't mean I'm mad or sad. It's just the way my face looks.
At times when my face is relaxed people have asked me why I'm mad or what am I so angry about. I tell them exactly what you said, it's just my face. I have never told anyone to smile. I simply try to relieve them off any stress they have, but only my friends. I honestly have no idea why the dudes bother you or what they want out of this. All I can say is if I had to guess it would seem they're doing this to piss you off because you may have reacted negatively in the past and some people are simply sadists. And I apologise on their behalf but I assure you this is most definitely not a guy thing. Or a Normal good guy thing. As far as the polite way is concerned, try this - I've noticed that you really like to see me smile and normally it should seem sweet, but I honestly don't know and I'm here at my job trying to work. I'm not a clown and I cannot keep smiling all the time. If only you could just stop telling me to, that would be great. I'm not sad or need your help, thank you.
Considering we’ve been oppressed for the past 15,000 years, I’d say starting to rise to an equal stance in society isn’t just “complaining”. And don’t say something along the lines of “angry feminist” because when the u. s legally had slavery, people would say stuff like that in regard to abolitionists as well. I wouldn’t tell you to smile— don’t tell me too. And most men wouldn’t tell a man frowning to smile either.
What about the fact that only now, within a little under a century, are women allowed to attend universities for the first time EVER? How about the fact that in parts of the modern world (as in 2019) young girls (ten or so) are still forced to marry men in their fifties, and have children. As an American woman, I have more freedom than almost any other woman since the Neolithic revolution. But nonetheless, women before me (my grandmother, for instance) were forced to be a housewife, and have kids as her sole purpose— her sole purpose was to serve someone else. Childhood marriage. Cult of domesticity. Lack of suffrage. Pay gap. I can’t walk home with out getting catcalled, and I can’t go to work without fearing for my life. Men doing things like this, seemingly mundane and obsolete, is the product of thousands of years of oppression. So, yeah. Don’t tell me to fucking smile more, I’ll look how I want to look.
@FýrdracaDócincel Have you ever studied world history? Everything is connected. In a nut shell, the agricultural revolution led to specialization of labor which led to social hierarchy which led to the patriarchy and a long fucking time later it led to a douche bag on the street telling me to smile more. Think about it like this: the context I listed prior enabled the patriarchy to develop makeup. Make up enhances feminine features, thereby holding every woman to high standards of beauty. This includes a smile. And this constant (fake) smile, in the face of any adversary, is not expected to be worn by men.
@FýrdracaDócincel but it’s not anymore. In the U. S., it’s primarily used by women, and so it’s the cultural norm for women to look better than they actually do, while men still look human
Jesus christ, so many feminist tears in this thread. Imagine being so privileged you are rendered a sweating crying mess of tears and temper tantrums over a guy that told you to smile.
@Just_a_human Most people. As we're a social species, we're always privileging what makes social interactions easier. Which looking good is. Also, smiling is a reflex reaction to happiness, or a pleasant stimulus. So someone smiling is most likely pleased or happy. Which, as other member of a social species, we like to see.
To put it simply: it shows you're not sad and make you look better.
I can understand if I'm in a conversation with someone and seem to be the mood killer of the group, but if I'm just minding my business, I'm not going to be smiling all the time.
It's messed up, but it does happen. People are a bunch of weirdos. They need to learn how to mind their own business. It's okay if you've never witnessed it, but it does happen.
well , it is better than slapping yah behind... and if so many people as well as being strangers are telling you to , maybe you do need to smile a little more often ;)
This is more about when you're walking around in public, maybe shopping, and someone tells you to smile. No one is going to think "I need to buy some cabbage" with a big smile on their face the whole time. XD
@ThisIsMyOpinion, if it's acceptable to order someone to smile because it's better than slapping on the ass, then slapping on the ass is okay because it's better than grabbing the pussy.
@HereIbe But it is not acceptable to order someone to smile. It being better than a slap on the butt doesn't make it oukey. Me chopping someone's head off is way better than me chopping their head off. Still chopping the hand is wrong.
stop being so self centred and try not to take yourself that serious. If you consider, someone is being a prick to you , you are in your right to bitch slap them. I usually reply with either , that is my resting bitch face, or, the only thing that makes me smile , is the thought of the fact , that every second , somewhere around the world , there is a person dying... the faces I get back, are priceless!
@ThisIsMyOpinion, dear STUPID PERSON: I wrote what I wrote specifically to show how RIDICULOUS the claim made by @hugzy is. Too bad you are TOO STUPID to pick up on that, moron.
also , when I talked about the butt slapping , I was referring to the process of change in mentality in men. and although there is tons of work to be done , we are getting there... never have I ever stated that I approve of objectifying humans and diminishing them to sex toys , nor am I a sexist. Pls stop projecting your frustration on to others, as well as , jumping on to conclusions!
@HereIbe someone woke up angry xD I didn't read that part of the conversation. But hey looks like he already gave you an explanation for what he meant.
Girl's Behavior 
Guy's Behavior 
Flirting 
Dating 
Relationships 
Fashion & Beauty 
Health & Fitness 
Marriage & Weddings 
Shopping & Gifts 
Technology & Internet 
Break Up & Divorce 
Education & Career 
Entertainment & Arts 
Family & Friends 
Food & Beverage 
Hobbies & Leisure 
Other 
Religion & Spirituality 
Society & Politics 
Sports 
Travel 
Trending & News 
Most Helpful Opinions