Awkward for years?

Question

About 6-7 years ago (maybe even more), I went to my baby cousins first birthday party. There was a guy there, he was the same age as me. He would always attend the party every year because his dad was a close friend to my baby cousins mom side. But anyways I thought he was cute so I told this girl named Jade there (she was also my age) so she could tell him. Again, I’m not sure why I did that? She did and I forgot what he said but, we had a conversation on Kik a year after. I can’t remember what it was about but it wasn’t awkward so I was guessing he wasn’t weirded out by me thinking he was cute. But the following years, we wouldn’t speak whenever we went to my cousins birthday party. It would just me looking at him and him not looking back. Or at least he wasn’t looking when I noticed. I don't know what changed because we were fine when we first met. And it’s still different to this day. Every year, whenever it’s my cousins party, we don’t talk. Or if it’s a situation where it’s my cousins game, or something else. I know once his mom talked to my grandma saying “ramiah’s getting older which means she’s gonna date soon” in a teasing way. So everyone basically knew I thought he was cute years ago. The last party was the weirdest one. Other times he would just stay in his room or two to his older brother. But this one we were right beside each other eating pizza in complete silence. Nobody even looked at each other. I guess things wouldn’t have been so awkward if I didn’t say he was cute years ago. So I admit that was my mistake. But I just wish things were cool between me, him, and that other girl. And we would hang out like we did at the first party.

Nobefore · Accepted Answer

Hi Bunny, thanks for the invite I hope I can help you. Your problem has two potential answers.

1. Shyness
Men are slightly different than us. They can't share emotional things easily. Even with their friends. That makes them a little less emotionally mature than you. Not a bad thing, but things are a little slower for him. If he has no sister that makes it even harder for him to act around girls. You do the same thing too. When you eat pizza with him you did not say anything either. So, both of you in the same side. That's the problem.

Or 2. Your girlfriend or one person in there said something to him. That made things awkward.

But the easiest way to figure things out is asking for the asking something. Easy to answer for him so there is no shyness blocks for both of you. In the next gathering go to him and ask with a low voice and say "Can I ask you something?"

If he says yes that's means he likes you but doesn't know what to do. He's cute as marshmallows and just needs a little help

But if he says no that means someone close to him did something to push you away. A man never says no to a girl's question unless they really hate you.

Good luck for it. I hope you can solve this. <3

Gwenhwyfar · Accepted Answer

Not awkward 😊. Just pretend the cute convo never happened.

molonski2 · Accepted Answer

Its been quite a length of time , sometimes its difficult for the guy in this situation , admiration is one thing , but I strongly suspect he needs a bit of a push , not just an online message.
Think about it? This started when you were 12 or 13 , thats a lot different to being 19 , Id throw it out there a lot more and make it a LOT MORE obvious.
Assuming he's about you age , 21 or the like , at this age for me , I had a mass of admirers , Id get told this stuff all the time ( things would be different now haha ) , but back then , I never knew what to do , Id be pleasant and nice , but I just didn't know , unless it was black / white obvious. So many since from ex school , sport clubs " Ohhh , I was so in love with you " , half the time I didn't know.
So , in conclusion , you dont want to die wondering yeah? Just really throw it open , ask him out , do the obvious stuff , get it started.. See what happens !
What can go wrong? Very very little if you think clearly about it. Sometimes you just have to throw caution to the wind , be direct.
Good Luck :)

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

My best guess is that he is not interested and he thinks that talking to you would be leading you on or encouraging you. Do you know if he has a girlfriend now?

JuliaStyles · Answer

Seven years ago, or longer, you would have been about 11. When I was at that age I wasn't interested a lot in boys. Let's face it, we don't even know what is going on most of the time. But each girl reaches puberty differently. but even after reaching puberty I didn't start showing an interest in boys until Jr. High. My question is what exactly is YOUR question here? If you are interested in someone then show it and talk to them. You will never get anywhere by just looking. The longer you wait the more chance of them being taken by another girl.

Aethereal · Answer

This was when you were both younger (assuming you're the age on your profile). Early teens is an awkward time in which we do and say awkward things. I still cringe when I remember some stuff I did back then.

He may feel that you forgot about him, or he forgot you even called him cute. He might be interested in you now, but is shy/nervous now because maybe he finds you cute and thinks you're out of his league, he might even have felt he is the one who said something awkward back then, and you're now avoiding him. I dunno, there could be many reasons.

Perhaps you could simply start over and talk to him. If he's shy, he won't. I did that a lot as a teen.

connemara_crocodile · Answer

Sounds like you don't have anything to loose. He's already not talking to you, so if you ask him of he's interested the worse thing that can happen is that he'll say no and things might continue to be awkward.

Of you can, you can say it in a funny way, so if he says no, maybe the ice would be broken and you can make a laugh out of it. Kind of like:
"So, you know I like you, are you gonna ask me out or you're not interested? 😜"
If he says no or puts some excuse you can reply
"Okay, but don't stop coming to the parties, so at least I can enjoy the view 😝"

Aakash_Hangargi · Answer

The answer is very very simple don't make assumptions.

Just goto him straight and ask him out.

It would be damn easy for you since everyone already knows.

He will be surprissed by your daringness and it would be fun you know 😃.

Or you initiate the talk since your adults now just do it bc if nobody talks to each other it won't move further don't get caught up in what would happen try and find out what will happen at least you would get an answer.

You were almost a teenager back then so I could understand that feeling and the courage required.
Now you are an adult just go and talk to him 🙂

abdullahaasim · Answer

Honestly, the only thing you need to do is talk it out with him. Ask him why he's ignoring you, you can even tell him that you were into him. Just completely tell him what is on your mind. who knows he may be having the wrong idea about you and waiting for you to interact with him again. Maybe someone stopped him from interacting with you. Just talk it out or else this would keep burdeining your mind whenever you see him. His truth may be sweet, it may be harsh, but tomorrow it will definitely be one issue solved.

he-takes-a-part · Answer

None of you had made anything worse or even improved it for that matters.
Seems like guy is least bothered of any compliments. Guess he gets enough when he is away from family.
Guy is little clever but living on his own terms. One can say that he is self doubting and has peer pressure to approach you coz now the setting has been made for him by you so if he approached he would easily be named. I believe he would still reply you on kik even today and can ask you to meet in person. But you are not that serious with him too thats what i infer.

JustinTimberlegs · Answer

Maybe he's the shy type who doesn't know how to talk to girls he's interested in. If you still have his details maybe message him online and just be like hey, we've known each other for so long but don't actually talk, wanna get to know each other? Ask 20 questions about each other or something. Either way if he doesn't want to talk to you, you should get the vibe and you don't really lose anything.

hellionthesagereborn · Answer

Well things are awkward only if you allow it to be. Just start talking to him like things are not awkward. I mean, its that or just awkward silence until you die. Some times you just have to power through and pretend to be oblivious to these things because again, its that or just lingering in silence waiting for something to happen. Nothing wrong with telling him you thought he was cute, as they say some times you have to shoot your shot. Just keep being you, its all you can do.

AmandaYVR · Answer

It's probably just the ages you are at now. He was a child before. Now he's a teenager, and the sexuality thing is awkward.
It doesn't necessarily mean he didn't like hearing it. He's socially awkward, and so are you. Just got to push past these things, break the ice again.

Smoke-n-Growls · Answer

He's probably waiting for you to talk first.

Don't let your brain run off with you. Anchor yourself in reality and just use your words and talk to him.

Yeah, sure, you'll be awkward. But he's experienced the same silence for two years and still sat next to you to eat pizza.

Just talk to him. Figure out with your words so your brain doesn't run wild with your imagined scenarios.

Bobsyeruncle · Answer

Sometimes we’re ‘damned if we do and damned if we don’t’.

Express some interest and it seems to push the other person away, stay silent and they just drift away.

My answer as I’ve grown older has been to become more blunt, step up and speak my mind. Then let the chips fall where they may.

Works pretty well for me, your mileage however, may vary.

Interstate · Answer

It just sounds to me as though he has lost interest. It happens. Yes it makes awkwardness between you when you have to be within sight of each other, for different reasons. But don't let that weirdness spoil your fun. Go to these parties, socialize with everyone, and just have a great time! It isn't as though you are two coworkers that have to see each other at work everyday. Now THAT would be awkward. In the meantime, live as always, try and keep your mind off of him and move on with life!

humpbackjack · Answer

More than likely he likes you but is embarrassed to talk to you. There’s a big difference between talking in person and talking on the phone. I’d say as long as you are both single that next time you should just pull him to the side and talk to him if you’re interested in dating him let him know that you want to hang out sometime and take it from there guys now a days seem to have a hard time talking to girls but I bet if you get it started he’ll feel more comfortable and open up to you

RasberrySlushPuppy · Answer

Yeah the thing to do is act normal again, it's been some time so just break the ice. He wouldn't have sat right by you if he was uncomfortable. He may not have actually had any feelings toward the opposite sex but now he may do. It's just how it is for some.

Browneye57 · Answer

This has to be one of the most stupidest things I've ever heard. If you want to TALK to somebody, you start with 'hi' or 'hello'. For gods sakes woman.

If he was interested in you he'd pursue you. This whole think is a complete fabrication in that little head of yours.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Can you log into Kik and find your old conversation and let us help you review it?

Floppy2112 · Answer

I remember when love was this innocent... He is obviously painfully shy and desperately afraid. Don't hold it against him, he doesn't know what to do, he most likely wants to talk to you, but doesn't know how or what to say.

MICHEAL9AJ · Answer

I understand why I did that, if I girl the I was know, or was good friends with tells me she thinks I'm cute, things would be awkward between us, mainly because you know that the person they nks you are cute or they even like you, you would start to be shy around them,

It's happened to me before

SnakeBoop · Answer

Meh, he just wasn't interested in you. people change over time, and if you're not actually close to begin with (since he just goes to the part of your cousins), then its not like you actually lost anything to begin with.

Nikki6t6 · Answer

Idk… I don’t think you did anything wrong. Maybe he’s just overly sensitive, extremely shy / introverted or possibly gay? I’m not sure… it’s hard to say. Why not just ask him?

hahahmm · Answer

So this guy is actually your 1st cousin if his bedroom is shared with your aunt's son. Yeah, don't go there.

No_biryani · Answer

Maybe he is just afraid that u won't like him and doesn't intiate the conversation. Why dont you try and talk to him and see where it goes

nudeNhorny · Answer

6-7 years ago you were around 12, everything was much less complicated back then, now you are 19, this is a very difficult age, people can become shy, socially awkward, insecure,...

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Always see if he is single and if he tells you so then start talking to him and make small talk but I do believe taking turns to stare at one another could bring two people together

TrueConfection · Answer

Next time, offer him a handshake and ask to be friends. Then follow up with something general like, "How's your summer going?"

RealMarek · Answer

I think if you stop worrying about whether he will speak with you, it will stop feeling so awkward. Maybe next time you see him just smile and say hello to him and see what he does.

supercutebutt · Answer

This is the exact sorta situation where a gloryhole would solve 100% of the problems. :)

stevef73 · Answer

He might not be confident to talk to you knowing you like him. You haven't done anything wrong. You should ask him face to face. I know this is easier said than done. I know personally have been to shy to talk to someone once I knew they liked me.

Hanrej · Answer

Puberty probably. When it hits people can act differently than they used to. He was probably fine with you liking him until then.

Bluemax · Answer

Why don't you initiate conversation? Better yet, why don't you just ask him out?

red_knight · Answer

I can't believe you still held on for this topic all thse years.. let go and move on. Talk and dont talk it's your choice nobody can change.

innerman · Answer

Its been a long time  and all this while he hasn’t even bothered to make friends with you...  You like him but going down this road will only cause u pain. Im sorry

Yaharro · Answer

Sad ask him what went wrong you seems have courage and reason to do so

karaspara · Answer

It was years ago put it behind you now maybe he is worried about leading you on

Tunasub · Answer

Just don't say anything about the past..

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

Just ignore him and have fun

OddBeMe · Answer

Then start talking to him again.

JesseJayNeak · Answer

Happened to me. She was a funny girl

ohshee · Answer

Make it happen

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