I am realizing that I am the red flag

[Anonymous]

I can admit, I have picked a lot of the wrong women. Women are crazy in a mans eyes. But that is only because us men think so differently than women.

I am realizing now with my age that I am the red flag.

I am 30 and just started a career taking care of autistic, down sydrome and the such. I could have had a job in medical assisting but I filed the ncct 3 times which you can only do 3 times in your life. you have to get at least 70% to pass and I got 63%.

If I applied myself a little bit more, I could have made it. I don't beleive myself enough. I get my feelings hurt too much and I didn't trust my last girl that I loved because of the past failures.

I am 30, still being told what to do and I have a hard time saving money.

Tis, I am trying to change. But it takes more than trying. If you say you try and never do then what is the point?

I am just doing what I can to work on myself for the better and acheive my goals but dammit it is hard.

But I want to make trying into doing.

have any advice?

[Arwens-Fire]

I think everyone has issues (red flags).But,its important that we are always working through those issues and striving to be the best that we can be.I commend you for working with the disabled.It takes time and patience to do so.So you're having a difficult time saving money...in this economy,that is the story of many peoples lives right now.Be greatful to have a JOB,plenty of people are still standing on the unemployment lines.

In regards to past failures or hiccups:Do not look on the past.There is NOTHING you can do to change it.But you can definitley improve TODAY and your future.I understand having past regrets,and saying and not doing,but you still have the ability to change and improve what you dislike... ESPECIALLY since you recognize how you can better yourself.Concerning past relationships,identify you trust and failure issues.If you can get to the core of it,seek help from a therapist.I know a lot of people think it sounds silly,or makes them feel lesser by seeking help,but I find its a positive move just to have an impartial and unbiased opinion from someone.Someone who can assist in helping you become the BEST you.

My advice:

FORCE A CHANGE.

*Write down long term,and short term goal.Put them where you can SEE them day in,and day out.

*Each day,look at it.Meditate on it,and see yourself completing and achieving those goals.

*Become obsessive about change.Let this be you NEW thing.

*Everyday...give yourself an alotted time to persue those endeavors.

*Where applicable,give yourself a time frame to achieve or get as close to achieving your endeavors.Without a time frame,and without pushing yourself,its easy to lose momentum and fall into not completing them.Which only wastes MORE time.

*Seek a support network.I believe in therapists,but I also believe in surrounding yourself with like minded people.AMBITIOUS and DRIVEN people.I have a couple of friends who I do something called..."Progress Reports" with.These are friends who are serious about succeeding in life.We call each other up...just to check in and we must provide NEW information about our progress of getting to the NEXT level and meeting goals.This alone assists in having accountability for what you do or DON'T do.I did this with my friend for all of 2012,and both of us has gotten closer to what we want in life.I managed to change my job location,get a raise,a new apt,pictures etc.Just things I needed to do...all in a year.For 2013,we are doing the SAME thing.Keeping close.Keeping it positive.

The advice I have given you,are things I am actively doing.Don't beat yourself up.You can still become the person you WANT to be.

What's done is done.Make change for TODAY.

Good luck.

[sexyasianboi26]

Dude, there was a point in my life where I made $100 a month and I was getting girls like it was nothing.

You are not the red flag, if you keep saying this to yourself, then you will eventually be the red flag. What you want in life, first comes a vision. So that is why I'm saying don't say this to yourself, life is tough, be positive.

You got a job, and your making a difference. Because you are taking care of the weak. Not many people, are in your place.

Savings is out of the table for you at the moment, just be glad you can feed yourself.

[yaddayaddayadda02]

You know how you eat a 2,000 lb elephant? One bite at a time. Same with your life. Pick one issue to work on to fix at a time. Don't try to tackle them all at once.