How to help overweight parent

[Anonymous]

What is the best way to go about helping an overweight parent get healthy? Directly confronting them about their issues or just doing things to try to get them healthy? I am 22 but live with my parents and because of that, I feel like it wouldn't be my place to tell my dad what he should or shouldn't eat, but his eating habits really worry me. I am scared he will drop dead from a heart attack one day. He will eat a bowl of ice cream for dinner, a cheeseburger and steak for lunch and then repeat for dinner, a bag of chips in one day, etc. Horrible...Anyways, should I flat out say something to him? Or just try to make my mom (she does the grocery shopping) not buy junk food? (My mom and I both cook healthy meals, it's mostly junk food that is the problem. But the problem with the second option is that I notice junk food wrappers in his car/man cave too, so I'm sure he'd go out and get some if we don't have in the house...)

[Stache]

This is hard to answer. At 54, I am as fit as can be. My father looked pregnant when he was alive and he did drop dead from a heart attack when I was in my 20's. His weight gain came from drinking and not doing anything but work. Psychologically, he was a divorced Catholic and married my mother who was 11 years younger. He was a great provider but very distant. I rebelled and could do nothing to stop his overindulgence's. He also loved ice-cream, popcorn steak, salt--he even put it in his beer and ate the fat on his steaks. So, by choice I decided I would never get fat like that and through the years whenever I got 5 pounds over my ideal weight, I cut back until I was normal again. You could ask him why he overeats when he knows it's bad for him.

My wife, on the other hand, let herself go and is about 25-30 pounds overweight. This has caused her a host of problems, not the least of which are relationship problems. I long for a thin girl or one average or even slightly overweight. She has had her spine fused, hip replaced, acid reflux issues and on and on. My 26 year old son has tried to get her to lose weight. He is thin as is my other son. He has tried many things, none have worked.

Why is she so overweight? I think it started when she was a teacher and hit upon by so many guys.. She is good looking and has a great personality, but her physical beauty kept guys attracted to her. It didn't help that she dressed alluringly. I tried to stop it, but could not. So she got fat. She over drinks. She does not want to give up drinking. So, I'm stuck.

I don't know what you can do but express your desire to have him around for grand kids and would he please start taking care of himself.

Good luck.

[martyfellow]

I'd just make suggestions; directly confronting anyone about their behavior is usually not effective. Just ask him to try various healthy foods, or ask him to go for a walk with you for exercise. They will know what you are getting at! They'll appreciate your being low key about improving their habits.

[Anonymous]

yea its guna take more than just you suggesting it, he has to do it own his own and he has to WANT to change... try showing him the movie "Fat, sick and nearly dead" My mom is slightly overweight but has the same bad eating habits, she never cared about getting healthy til she saw that movie, the next day she bought kale, apples, ginger to make a green smoothie! I was so happy for her! It didn't stick though...but its was great to see her motivated for at least a short time.. I strongly feel people need a message from god which usually comes after something serious like a heart attack, unfortunately people wait that long... and some don't even change then, they figure they'll die anyways...just be a good example and don't worry too much, he has to do it on his own, if he chooses to.

[Anonymous]

Well my parents mentally abused me about it but I wouldn't do that. I would sit down and talk to her and tell her that you love her and are worried about her health. Tell her that you are willing to help her. Maybe she can do weight watchers that program works. Or you guys can just eat right together and work out. On the other hand if she does not want to change then she won't some people don't have if they are fat and unhealthy so if that's the case then there is nothing you can do.

[Longshot]

You can say stuff like "Dad, you know you should start eating healthier food. It will make you feel better and keeps your weight down."

The problem of course is that it's easier siad than done. Until he makes the decision to do it, nthing will happen.

[Anonymous]

Say what you said here. Say that you are worried about his health and you would like him to eat healthier. He should know that he doesn't have to cut that stuff completely. He just needs to cut back and eat other things with nutritional value. As with anything, that person will need support, so if you don't stay on him and your mom is not on board, nothing is going to happen. Also, exercise with him. Having that other person around will help him be motivated.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

well make it harder on him to get them and ask your mom to tell her which way is the best to talk to him about it. or watch a lot of the biggest loser and make your dad watch it.

[Anonymous]

Just keep any bad food as away from him as you can also get facts about obesity nd paste them all over the house

[Anonymous]

i don't think there's a wa yunless you ask the whole family to go for a check up and let the doctor tell him what he should do.