I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️

I never understood for what reasons we men were "indoctrinated" since we were little boys to never cry as it was seen as girly and weak and a sign of defeat. Quite literally we were either told and programmed to never cry or we received the same idea from the media and the movies of immortal superheroes... for the better or worse but the reasons were never disclosed. That is until I made the bitter discovery myself, which I am going to share with you all, so you hopefully won't repeat the same mistake, that I did.

In fact there are actual and disclosed reasons why holding it all in is a bad idea as it is damaging and degrading our invaluable health long term. I mean seriously, it's not good, it does more harm than gain. I've tried that myself and it took it's big toll on me.

In regards to men crying I have posted one and the same question 2 times already here and here and the responses I got was pretty much the same: Practically non existent.

So I am going to draw conclusions out of what I have already so far.

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️

My story

I live very far away from my actual home. I can hardly get used to my new area even though i am here for many years already. What am I doing here? I am studying and working, going to graduate soon. Fate didn't allow me to go back home.

I had a very hard time earlier this year. The stress i got from everything in my life was too much for me to handle. My job demanded a lot of labor within 40 hours, my studies and exams in my semester wore me out, i had no time for any hobbies and the chores in my home piled up as a result of focusing on both. The ultimate trigger was my sudden homesickness recurring to me again.
So one day I came home earlier than usual from work and took one day off also to do something about my stress levels and emotional health. It became unbearable for me.
My then girlfriend of 9 months asked me via text how i am and me being the honest man i told her, that I'm down and in tears. BIG, FATAL MISTAKE❗️ The point of no return has been reached. I should not have done this 🤦‍♀️

She decided to come over to me to support me. We cuddled, leaned on each other and she saw me crying and she also broke into sobbing and tears. We wiped the tears off, stroke each other and had our arms around each other at all times. She stayed that night at my place and we slept together in the same bed (no sex!).

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️
2 weeks later she ceased all contact with me and ghosted on me and left me with her lies, that she'll always be there for me and that she can't leave me like this and that she loves me very much. Well, she did the exact opposite of what she told me.
It's been 6 months since then.

So like what can we learn from it? Never cry? Never let your woman see your wounds and tears? Never tell your woman that you're down and in tears? We men are the leaders and if a leader falls, then what kind of leader is that? is that it? Were we as boys taught this for this exact reason? It's literally impossible. We aren't indestructible machines.
Or was she just a bitch and the relationship could not have lasted either way? She was my first everything from my first kiss all the way through intimacy. 🤷

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️

My advice

At some point you (as a guy) likely will have to release tears and that's perfectly normal. I encourage it but do so very carefully.

1) First and most important

Do NOT cry in front of your girlfriend. I know - that should have been obvious from the get go.

And do not cry in front of any of her friends either. Or anyone, who has direct contact to her. Word about it will get to her and you'll be busted and single faster than you may figure.

Crying in front of your girlfriend is a break up sentence ☠ Do absolutely everything and anything within your powers and by any means necessary to not let it happen.

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️

Think about it. If her boyfriend cries (and men are "supposed" to be leaders, strong and unstoppable) what do you expect would happen or her reaction would be? Women want to date men - unless she's a lesbian, feminazi or a WGTOW (women going their own way) of course. None of it are of any dating chances for any man.

2) Find a safe room and lock yourself in - alone 🗝

Hide in the basement, in the garage, in the workshop... anywhere, where you're alone.

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️

The bathroom works the very best of all. In the bathroom you can turn on the faucet or the shower and sob silently 🚿. The sound of the running water will mask your weeping. Wash the evidence of you crying away afterwards with water and you can leave the bathroom with your business done and unsuspecting!

Your bedroom or bed is not a good option. Your woman may want to join you under your blanket and she'll discover your wet eyes.

If not at home, then go for a secluded place outside somewhere. The forest, an empty parking lot, somewhere behind a business center (business centers may have a WC but you'd better hope they're still open and accessible to you and that they're little rooms!). Make sure to bring napkins, a water bottle and/or towels with you, so it looks like you're just sweating.

Plan ahead, so you can unfold your plan! I want you to plan ahead after reading this article.

3) Women are quite sneaky and observant 🔭 - Subtly dive under their radar

Even when we think we are not being watched by them right now, they are always watching

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️
I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️

If you want to get away from your woman in order to cry privately, you will have to find your path under their radar if crying at home is not an option.

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️

For example pretend, that you need to go to the store and buy something or that you must visit your doctor for some consultation.

Going to buy new clothes, cologne, bags or groceries is a no go. Women love that and will want to join you. You will have to go to a shop, where women are very unlikely to come along with you: Hardware store, electronics, car parts... And when you return, you say, that you didn't find the needed part or that it was sold out or that you got the information you needed. Easy.

Again, you must plan ahead now and be realistic how you will play out your plan with many "in case of" scenarios. She may likely ask "What do you need? Where exactly are you going to go? When will you be back? Can I join you? But you have never gone to X before.".

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️

But on the bright side

You must understand, that us crying is the real test of your girlfriend's loyalty. Make use of it extremely wisely. You can call it our male variant of "shit test" for women whereas women have many more "shit tests" for us.

If she's a good one, she'll stay. If not, she'll abandon you like she abandoned me.

There are some passes, where you actually can cry in front of her in case you lost forever a close one, your relative, your pet and so on. It's just extremely sad, that the death of somebody is your one of the few if not the only pass to shed some tears like it's some sort of "cry your heart out" card.

Count your blessings

So what if it didn't work out either way?

No girlfriend is better than a terrible girlfriend. It depends on how soon you are comfortable with it.

Realize, that life goes on regardless and that there are many more things to life than girls.

You are in charge of your own life. Lead on. You will fall and rise and laugh and cry and run and sleep and be courageous and fear and win and lose... Keep moving forward and don't stop (unless you have to patch yourself up temporarily).

One thing is certain

Unless i am absolutely and confidently 1000% sure, that I can trust my next and future woman OR i am ready to test her loyalty towards me, certain deals (in particular crying) must be kept strictly and deeply hidden and never be uncovered like even more than cheating. Not even an electrical chair type of interrogation will make me confess. I will stay true to my oath. If a woman asks me how I'm feeling, any other response than "wonderful/good" or "neutral/so and so" I will not say 😬🤐

Of course I am missing the good memories of relationships and love but as much as I want a girlfriend it's not meant to be for me at this time as it seems. To mitigate the loneliness and the problems of being single for too long and the lack of love I am currently on antidepressant meds to maintain myself as well as hanging out with my friends. Fortunately it's been working for me.

I thank you for reading! I hope you have taken something valuable from my article and learned a thing or two. If you have anything interesting to say, say it now.

Have a wonderful day!

I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️
I will never cry in front of any girlfriend ever again⚠️
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Sorry that happened w you. But dude, it's okay to cry in front of your girlfriend. If she stays with you even after you cried, then you can say that you have a true girlfriend, otherwise you were just wasting your time with her. It's a good way to test your girlfriend's loyalty and love for you. If she leaves, that's better cuz you now have room for a better one.

    After reading your take I felt like you have been badly abused by your girlfriend. It's *alright* to cry in front of your girl. Not every girl is like your ex. My ex did that with me too. Some girls are just needy and want reassurance that a guy is with them at that time to make them feel loved. Whenever she was crying, I never left her side and stayed with her till she felt alright but once I said that I have been feeling like crying too and she brushed that off 😄 and returned when I started feeling normal, she couldn't understand. Some girls only prioritize themselves and they definitely aren't worth it. Not all girls are needy and selfish like that. Indeed there are good ones out there too. Just keep looking for them till you land with a good one. And make sure to test her by telling her once or twice that you have been feeling like crying. Staying in a relationship where your girl doesn't want is destined to be doomed in one way or other.

    P. S. your girlfriend never loved you.

    • Doesn't want you to open up*

    • Anonymous

      "If she stays with you even after you cried, then you can say that you have a true girlfriend, otherwise you were just wasting your time with her. It's a good way to test your girlfriend's loyalty and love for you. If she leaves, that's better cuz you now have room for a better one."

      True words of wisdom right here mate! I think you are pretty clever at 18 years. I have the same view as you in those regards.

      I can't say I was exactly abused but traits of being abusive were exhibited by her a couple of times. But since now I am looking at the bigger picture, I have literally lost nothing but a heartless bitch. And toxic people belong blocked and deleted forever. That she has deserved. Now it's time to bloom in life and find a nice, sweet and good girlfriend :)

      "your girlfriend never loved you."

      That was news for me shortly after the day I cried. Still good reminder!

    • Sure thing buddy! Now it seems you're doing good. Never afford to get yourself hurt and be sure to have a defending wall for yourself. Oh and not every girl is like that.. it's just a matter of time till you find the best one for you. Till then, keep on having experiences and test the girls who come along your way. Just make sure you don't go too far testing otherwise you'll scare the right one away from you lol.

      Here is a take I wrote in case you need to read anything about getting over an ex 😊:

      Getting Over An Ex ↗

    • Show All
  • oneleggedwonder

    I do not think you are being fair to yourself my friend. Is it possible you drew the wrong conclusion? It was two weeks later, not a long time, but she could have other reasons for ending the relationship? You should not be with any woman who holds it against you if you cry, unless you cry quite often. Your partner should be at ease with your emotions, and if you have to hide to shed a tear, your not showing your future girlfriend or wife the true you. The best revenge is ultimate success, move on, have a very happy life and someday she might regret letting you go. Good luck

    • Anonymous

      Not much happened during those 2 weeks. She gradually began to cease contact until she began to completely ghost me. Everything seemed normal except she started fading away after the day I cried.

      I highly agree, that the best revenge is ultimate success - however that will happen without her or her knowledge. I have blocked and removed her from everything. He's out of my sight and out of my mind. All that matters to me is my own happiness and well being. Me suffering is what exes feed upon. I am not going to be giving them any of that ✊

    • Sounds to me like you are traveling the road of wisdom. Do what you do for yourself, do everything, and anything to keep her out of your mind. But do not hide who you are to anyone. Emotions are normal. Crying is normal. My dog died 3 years ago. I cried more in the next 2 months than I did the rest of my life combined. I think that is the only way I got through that. Good luck!

    • Anonymous

      Indeed! I thank you, friend!

Most Helpful Girls

  • yucychan

    I have to disagree with you on your take.
    As one who cries very easily, I think it will very selfish and unfair of me to expect that men should not cry.
    Why shouldn't men cry? Are they not human beings with feelings and emotions as well? I don't think a man who tears up are any less manly then one who doesn't.
    If your ex could not stand to be with you just because you are down and stressed out, then she doesn't deserves you. I don't think she even loves you in the first place. Look for another that truly loves you.

    • Anonymous

      I thank you for your words!

  • HayleyMarie

    I’m so sorry that happened to you. Just know that all women aren’t like that. I’d love to be with a man that wasn’t afraid to let out emotion. After dating the complete opposite who was not the consoling type and didn’t think sad was an emotion for him, I’d take a guy like you any day.
    Be who you are and the right woman will accept it and love your for it. Don’t be afraid to cry, we all need it now and then.

    • Anonymous

      That's very good to know! I appreciate it very much :)

      "Be who you are and the right woman will accept it and love your for it."

      Definitely 😍

    • I hope I helped. Thanks for MHO 😊

    • Anonymous

      It's why you got the MHO :)

What Girls & Guys Said

6477
  • Some_Goof

    I'm sorry for what happened to you.
    I myself never cry in front of anyone, be it my family members or any friends.

    • Anonymous

      It can be a smart decision.

  • She broke up with you 2 weeks after. How is it related?

    If you want to deny yourself the basic human right of expressing emotion for the sake of getting your dick inside a heartless woman, go ahead.

    Or, you can accept the fact that humans cry and that anybody who has an issue with that is trash.

    • Anonymous

      Well, I agree with you. It's just, that her inner heartless bitch did not surface until the time she did :/
      Not much happened during those 2 weeks. She gradually began to cease contact until she began to completely ghost me. Everything seemed normal except she started fading away after the day I cried.

    • The solution is to find a woman that’s not heartless, not to bottle up your emotions. That’s unhealthy,

    • Anonymous

      I will work on it definitely 👍

  • VaIiant

    So let’s get this straight. She never told you she dumped you for crying, but you automatically assumed so? You’re an idiot, for more then this idiotic article.
    My boyfriend has cried in front of me, multiple times, and I’ve never thought negatively. In fact it moves me that he’s comfortable enough to be emotional around me, if anything I feel more positive about it and want to fix what’s making him upset. BS on this whole thing

    • Agree. I was going to write my own opinion but this pretty much sums up my own experience and thoughts on this matter.

    • BULLSHIT! The ONLY reason any woman would stay with a crying man is if he presents himself as alpha. If an average looking guy cries you ladies would dump his ass. Now Valiant if that really is you in your avatar I highly doubt you are dating a beta male. A woman like you always gets the alpha male and you allow him some weakness.

    • @CarpetDenim , at your age all males are weak so you instinctively allow him some weakness.

    • Show All
  • williael

    Please count me out of the "all women do this or that" category. Some of us understand what an honor it is to be entrusted with a man's most vulnerable self. It would never turn me off or make me run to see tears of sorrow, frustration, regret, humiliation, etc. My personal belief is that every man needs one person (at least) in his life with whom he can honestly share everything. Just because you shared it with the wrong person doesn't mean there isn't a right person. I agree with whoever said that a mature woman would not act this way. Men have feelings just as every human being does, and it makes me grit my teeth in frustration when women give our entire sex a bad name by failing to appreciate the faith, strength, and trust it takes for a man to reveal his most vulnerable self. I can't stand abusive women! Who gave them the right to tell any man what he should be or do? Who gave her the right to define you in any way? To be the guardian and the only completely trusted person in my man's life is one of my most treasured accomplishments, and believe me, he is ALL MAN! And I will treat him as such! Women, your reaction to his crying has the power to make or break him. Why in the world would you want to break him?

    • mattl338

      Well said :) I'm glad you understand, because I understand how this guy feels because I feel like i shouldn't cry around GFs because i feel like they don't want me to and it's been shown before. I'm glad you understand how most of us feel :) and EXACTLY! How they react to our sorrow, pain, regret, etc has the power to make or break us, and why would they want to break us? I agree wholeheartedly and I hope I find a girl who understands this like you do :) Thank you ^^

    • Anonymous

      I am quite impressed by your comment! I have to agree with it. Thank you for these very wise words! I will keep those in the back of my mind :)

    • Anonymous

      Make or break a man! I gotta remember that. Hence crying being our "shit test"! This is it!

    • Show All
  • Nicolette777

    I’ve heard girls say they wished their boyfriends would cry infront of them occasionally! Personally, I think it’s hot when a man has a few tears coming from his eyes but is trying to stay strong by not making sounds or funny faces etc. I would be highly surprised if a woman left her boyfriend because he cried once or twice. If a man cried a lot, it would be severely unattractive- sorry but it’s true. It’s okay (if not preferred) to see a man cry once over something worth crying over.

    • if it's unattractive why do girls cry once a week lol (by the way i dont see them in the bathroom when they walk past a mirror)

    • Touché. Because society teaches that’s its okay for women to cry in public. Believe it or not, quite a few men have a fetish for crying women. It’s makes them feel powerful and masculine, like they want to protect the women. It’s stupid but it’s built into men to crave power and the feeling of masculinity.

    • I'm not a very emotional person myself (the last time I can remember crying was when I was eight years old, and it was from physical pain). I couldn't be with a man who cried a lot or was overly emotional, but if my boyfriend cried, I'd know it was something pretty serious and leaving him wouldn't even cross my mind.

    • Show All
  • invalid1

    Crying is good thing, it relieves mental stress and makes you feel better.
    I kinda agree with you. Of course not all women are the same. But it's honest to say that the picture of us in the heads of females. As Being Viking warriors or a superman. is actually pretty much deep. I have seen so many women describing their partners as not real men. and I bet many others have noticed this as well, things like he's "not man enough" he's "girly", "week", "a pussy", especially that last word. I find it rare for men to describe each other this way. I don't know the reason , perhaps they keep this ideal picture of men strength makes them feel better, or perhaps because we underestimate their strength.

    I am confident in my manhood and my strength. and I wish I can cry and summon crying more and better. Because for me crying is positive for mental health. I also can turn my frustrations into anger but anger is more harmful for my life. I also wish to find a woman who prefers to see me crying and gets over it, than having me beating the hell outta her or shouting at her. :)

    • Anonymous

      100% agreed! 👍

  • Didn't see your prior questions, they are good questions. This is a tough topic honestly, and one that needs deeper understanding.

    I think you'd have to sit and walk through in more detail what was goign on (maybe with a counselor) and as well, try to talk to that girlfriend as to what really happened. We are making an association of the crying event to the breakup... there may be more to this. You are asking us to diagnose a situation based upon what you've conveyed... that is usually not the whole story and thus the conclusion may be false.

    But... it could be true. girls will say "I want his emotions"... but if they see weakness... it scares them.

    Men have trouble being vulnerable because it looks like we are weak. If the crying is conveyed from a viewpoint of strength... of love! then I think it improves the bonding. If it is "I'm broken inside"... might be best doing that in middle of a forrest. If it is viewed as weakness it can be trouble. One bout of it... maybe not too bad. Continual.. she is going to feel she is dealing with a child.. someone more moody than she is, or it may trigger her own issues from childhood not to mention her female lineage that says "pick an emotionally strong man". Then she will run in fear.

    • Anonymous

      I don't keep in touch with toxic people. That bitch is blocked and deleted from my end.

      "But... it could be true. girls will say "I want his emotions"... but if they see weakness... it scares them."

      This is the challenge, that men face. Damned if we don't cry. Damned if we do cry. What shall it be?
      Just go with the flow of life. Things are unfolding naturally as they are 'meant to be'.

  • BluesheepOwl

    The girl you dated was the kind who enforced double standards. I'm sure you'll find a girl who doesn't care if you cry. There are a lot of double standards people still enforce.

    • Anonymous

      I agree. Thank you for the support.

  • NineBreaker

    I generally agree with the main point. However, I am of the opinion that if a guy wants to cry in front if anyone, he could, as long as he's OK with the consequences: often including turning off women.

    I have said it before, and I will say it again: Men who show emotional vulnerability are often mercilessly shamed and ridiculed, and often far, far more so by women than other men.

    Personally, I don't cry in front of anyone, for any reason. No exceptions. I never even cried in front of other people when my father passed away, and I have never felt sadder in my life than that point.

    For the women who say they're OK with their significant other crying in front of them, either:
    1. They're the rare few who truly are,
    2. They're in denial, or
    3. They're blatantly lying (probably don't want to be perceived as being heartless)

    I know at least some women may strongly disagree with me, and may dislike what I'm saying, but that is one of the unfortunate realities that is unique to our experience as men. The reality is, that if you cry in front of others, you are far more likely to be comforted if you're a woman.

    Don't believe me? Ever heard tge phrase "I hate to see a grown man cry"? Not "a grown woman". Not "an adult", but a man.

    There are challenges that are unique to women. There are challenges unique to men. That one is unique to men. Just saying.

    • Anonymous

      Exceptionally well written - especially the last part topped it all off! I agree completely!

    • Thanks!

  • just_a_potato

    Wow I didn't know guys were so afraid of crying I always thought to myself
    "Just cry if you need to?"
    Whenever my guy friends told me they couldn't but I see why they were all rejecting the idea yikes
    don't be afraid to cry good people won't leave you when you do

    • Anonymous

      Now you know what's truly going on. We retreat back into our man caves and repair our (mechanical) damages like it's our own private garage. It's right there, where we heal up and let it all out. 100% Alone.

  • Glue-Sniffer

    This is your story. I don't know why she broke up with you. Maybe it was because of your tendency of jumping to conclusions and making sweeping statements?
    My boyfriend has cried in front of me quite a few times within the last few years and we are still together. You are cutting out a big portion of the story. What Happened during the two weeks prior to the breakup?

    • Izumiblu

      Yeah this was exactly my feeling as well.

    • mattl338

      More of the story would help yeah, and you make a decent point.

    • Anonymous

      Well, that's pretty much the point. Not much happened during those 2 weeks. She gradually began to cease contact. Everything seemed normal except she faded away.

  • AuroraRoseat

    This is horrid advice. I’ve had a male friend cry in front of me because of another girl and I comforted him. Not all women will do such things that has happened to you and it is utterly nonsensical to project a SINGLE (or even multiple) experiences onto a group of people.

    I agree with the woman who said it seems like you had a lot going on in your life coupled with a woman who didn’t know how to handle it.

    • Lightning8

      You do realize that you didn't mention you had a "boyfriend" who cried and you then comforted, while continuing to stay with him long term.

    • Lightning8

      That's the topic

    • Lightning8

      ; Boyfriends, not "male friends"

    • Show All
  • My boyfriend cried in front of me a few times. Especially after his dad died. I never ever thought ill of it in fact it made me love him even more because he has such a hard exterior but is a marshmallow on the inside. He has a pure heart like a child and it breaks my heart when I see him cry. I would do anything to take his pain away.

    • mattl338

      Awwww that's so sweet :, ) you're a good girlfriend and I wish you and him a long happy life together :)

    • Anonymous

      That's sweet indeed! This is the kind of girlfriend I wish I would have.

  • I would be really disappointed if a guy would sneak off to cry! It would make me feel like he doesn't trust me or that he isn't comfortable being with me. I really hope my boyfriend doesn't do that! I want him to know that I love him and would act crazy because he shows his emotion. It's normal to cry you know so why bother that your boyfriend does? That girl really sounds shitty and fake, not all girls are like that just like not all boys are manipulative and toxic!

    • Understandable but you realize that society pressures men into dampening their emotions, making them think they are weak for having them? That’s why many sneak off to cry. It has nothing to do with trust

    • @AuroraRoseat Yeah I just hope that he would learn that I'm okay with him showing his sadness. I know that it's more than trust but I can't change the way I would feel...

    • The problem is that it typically has little to do with how you feel about it, and everything to do with how he feels about it. The shame goes deep for most men, to the point that they feel like less of a man, like a failure, when they cry in front of others. For me, even when I want to be more open about my emotions, even when others tell me I can open up to them, it's like this tight feeling in my chest (I guess it's a guilty/shameful feeling? Kinda hard to describe) tells me that my sadness would just be a burden to the other person, and that burdening them with my emotions/problems would make me a shitty friend/partner/person. I dont view other people in this way, I am typically very accepting of other peoples emotions, but when it comes to talking about my own sadness, I get this overwhelming feeling of guilt and shame.

      If you want a man to open up to you like that then you need to tell him that it's alright, though he probably won't believe you at first. It takes quite a bit of coaching to overcome the shame.

    • Show All
  • I have never heard a women say she would leave if her man cries. If anything I hear that they want their man to cry and show emotion. I would never leave my man because he cried. Men aren't robots, they are human with feelings and they can express those feelings. My man of 10 years has cried in front me a few times, never crossed my mind to leave him only comfort him.

    • Its female nature you cry you weak it's just how your minds work you want hyper strong men who never have even a shred of weakness so when a man Cry's your female minds automatically see him as not strong enough

    • No it doesn't. I think I would know what MY brain thinks better than you.

    • It dosent happen consciously in your mind that's not what your thinking its in your subconscious where it happens females are programmed to choose the strongest male so they have the highest chance of surviving and when your brain sees weakness it starts to think that they are not a good protector you don't do it deliberately but your mind will still do it its your nature

    • Show All
  • I never have had a problem with a man crying. My ex cried of course with the big things like a family member dying but occasionally he'd cry under extreme stress like during a long job layoff or something like that. He didn't cry all the time just occasionally. His family, also, lived in a war zone so that was stressful of him. I honestly would prefer my boyfriend or partner to cry than to bottle stuff up and get depressed or non communicative.

    • Anonymous

      Good to know!

  • nerms123

    Uhh. My boyfriend cried and I didn’t leave him so I don’t think this is the case but sorry this happened to you.

    • Anonymous

      Thanks!

  • GraveDoll

    Eh

    I seen all my male friends cry. I had past boyfriend cried
    I never laughed or felt like it a bad thing.
    Aren't guys human too? I seen my dad cry. It just a natural human respond to whatever.

    I'm girl and I barely cry and my male friends have to remind ME it ok to cry.

    • Anonymous

      Naw, we are mechanical machines. We don't really cry. What actually happens is just oil leaking out of our eye corpus while steam leaves our orifices during intense ventilation.
      Just joking. We are human too just like women.

  • girl504

    this is bad advice. 2 days ago my boyfriend of three years broke up with me and we both cried. It was actually the first time I saw him cry. it made me cry harder. he left because he said he needed time for himself. but him crying broke me. I could tell that this was hard on him and for me. he never talks about his feelings so for him to cry showed me he cared and was sad about losing me.

    • mattl338

      Awww :,'(

    • Anonymous

      That doesn't make any sense. It is a stupid reason to break up for the space of it. I suspect he had a different and hidden reason for the break up.

  • Pranoo1

    Crying before a woman owing to some deep hurt does not make him any less manly in her eyes. A mature woman would understand that more easily.

    • Anonymous

      I agree. However practice shows it's varying by around half-half.

  • chunlilovesvega

    not all girls are man-hating bitchy feminists.

    I'm a strict anti-feminist and I hate to be considered as I am similar to any other female I'M NOT, there are females who actually value men's lives and emotions more than their own, we are rare but we exist. :(

    • Anonymous

      I thank you for your words!

  • ManOnFire

    This is exactly what I've been saying on GaG for a long time now. Women talk about men needing to open up and be emotional but don't really believe we should. They are not really as empathetic as they want people to believe.

    Sorry about what happened to you.

    • Anonymous

      Thank you my friend!

  • Tiffany_Taylor_Made

    If a man cries for any reason other than a loved one dying, experiencing extreme pain such as the torment of getting shot or undergoing some other type of extreme agony, hearing that he has a terminal illness, speaking to his loved ones on his own death bed, and so on, I wouldn't date him. Men are supposed to be emotionally strong. Think of it this way: If men are often biologically bigger and stronger than women, then it makes sense that men are expected to be protectors and providers. If so, then men should be able to have the emotional strength to deal with whatever stress they face while being such providers and protectors. When they start crying about things such as not having time for work, being away from home, the responsibilities of adulthood, and so forth with that "woe is me" attitude, it shows immaturity and emotional weakness. Therefore, I can't take them seriously as men. Instead, they have the mentality of children. If your girlfriend did leave you for crying in front of her, I personally don't blame her. Good on her. However, if that were me, unlike her, I wouldn't even waste my time cuddling and crying with you.

    As soon as I noticed that you were crying about the things that you listed, I would have broke up with you on the spot and found an emotionally stronger man. No real woman wants to deal with a man that cries simply because he has it hard in life, but crying about actual major things such as a loved one dying, extreme pain, and/or terminal illness is a different story and is acceptable. For example, if you told me that you had stage-four cancer or that your mother died and started crying, I'd lend you my shoulder and support you every step of the way. However, if you told me that you got fired from work or didn't have time for you hobbies and started crying, then it's automatically over between us. I want a real man and not an emotional little boy. I agree that you should take your own advice about never crying around your girlfriend. Work on being emotionally stronger. I'm not trying to be mean to you with this opinion/answer, but rather give you a dose of tough love and reality. Tough love doesn't kill you; it only makes you stronger, which is what you desperately need.

    • Janncis

      People like u are responsible of a lot male suicides. Maybe if someone close to you dies in same way, you will start to think with your head.

    • Rusty54321

      Tiffany Taylor that’s the most inconsiderate thing I’ve read in a while

    • @Janncis I hope that lady doesn’t have any sons and never will have any.

    • Show All
  • I'm sorry about what she did to you...

    It is interesting how some women talk about wanting their man to cry, only to leave him as soon as he does, but of course, the true test comes when the man actually cries.

    That is why I prefer a woman who does not buy into what society tells us men are supposed to be like, I want a woman who would never leave me, and would always be there to comfort me when I feel sad.

    Honestly, women like the one you had to deal with are some of the worst.

    • Anonymous

      "It is interesting how some women talk about wanting their man to cry, only to leave him as soon as he does, but of course, the true test comes when the man actually cries."

      Tell me all about it. You took the words right out from my mouth.
      Damned if we do. Damned if we don't. Argh! What shall it be? 😱🤯💥

      Yeah, she's a heartless bitch. That's why I blocked her and deleted her. She's forgotten history. It's time to bloom in life. At least there's room for a proper girlfriend now ☺

  • Shutupman

    She was a bitch and it wouldn’t have worked out. I’m sorry she hurt you like that. Men should be able to express their emotions too. I’ve known men to cry and it has never made me think any less of them.

    • Anonymous

      Good to know.

  • redpanda_

    I would never leave a man if they cried in front of me, I have more respect for a man who shows how he feels rather than tries to act all strong and tough.

    • Anonymous

      Good to know!

  • Channing5000

    I couldn't get through all that, bro, but broke into laughter at the point you think the skank (it means liar) left you because you cried. Keep telling yourself that, dude, and you won't fix your other real problems that are your personality deficiency that she left you over. She wasn't worth your time anyway, she needs to fix herself too.

    • Anonymous

      I realized that by now. I'm doing much better now. Simply put: The trash took itself out.

  • My boyfriend did tell me he cried and I heard the emotional breakdown he was having over the phone. It did trigger me a little , I didn't know what to do in that situation, because he just wanted to be left alone , he got explosively angry. It was quite a shock. When I cry , I will seek comfort and such, we still together and I totally forgot about that , until I read here.

    • Anonymous

      Wow.

  • jojouzumaki

    i’m sorry you feel that way. though you should be happy coz it take courage to show your vulnerability to someone. Use your experience to be better for yourself. find someone who is worthy of your tears.

    • Anonymous

      I thank you for your words of wisdom!

  • Baloney! There is nothing wrong with crying when you need to let it out. I'm sorry your girlfriend was a twat but they exist. You should be glad you found out sooner than later. Women say men show no emotions, and I can see why if all men can't let it out once in awhile. Every once in awhile everyone needs a good cry. It relieves stress and pent in feeling and emotions. If a person cannot cry when they need to then they have no soul, or are just afraid it will make them look like a wuss. You don't need to be strong all the time. In John 11:35, even Jesus wept. People can also cry with happiness or seeing a sad movie. I would gladly take a guy who can cry when needed than some stoic rock face who has the emotions of a stone statue.

    women say men show no emotions

    • Anonymous

      "women say men show no emotions"

      And now you know what's truly going on. We are retreating back into our man caves and repair all our (mechanical) damages from the daily routines like it's our private garage.

      Yeah, she's no good. It shall be her loss and my gain, that I know who I truly dealt with.

    • Funny, women say the same thing about men. Seems like they should both check their baggage and get on the same page.

    • Anonymous

      What do you mean?

  • janna_jcb

    I’m sorry for what happened to you. I just want to let you know that you can definitely cry in front of your girlfriend. I know of not one girl who wouldn’t accept it. I personally see it as a strength to cry in front of someone else and discuss your problems and feelings with them, as it shows you are not afraid to show imperfections and you trust them.

    • Anonymous

      Very good to know!

  • lunarmoon

    I feel so sorry that society has done this as someone who struggles with depression i know how hard it can be you should feel able to feel your emotions regardless of your gender im so sorry you had a girl do that to you im here if you ever need to talk or vent

    • Anonymous

      Thank you a lot! I got the support I wanted :)

  • Poppykate

    Unfortunately, you just chose the wrong girl. You should be able to express your true and honest feelings to your partner. If not, then show them the door.

    • Anonymous

      Thank you for your words!
      Well, she's out fortunately. She's blocked and forgotten everywhere on my end. Got no room or time for toxic people.

    • Oh please 🙄 senior perinfection what a great word I just invented you are weak as puppy 🐶 pisser if you really must cry don’t do a lot of it maybe just a little bit but do it while running 🏃‍♀️ remember just a little bit

  • Soft4u

    Excellent myTake, it's a shame you did it being emotional bc there's where the incorrect information came from your emotions.
    If things with your ex turned out the way it should have turned out perhaps then you would have done a myTake on the flip side of guys that cry in front of their girlfriend.

    Crying isn't a sign of weakness it's a sign of strength, anyone that doesn't know that and looks at a guy crying as being weak has a lot to learn about strength & weakness.

    I'm sorry this happened to you, I'm sorry your experience with your very first love ended for other reason's but the blame goes to you crying in front of her.

    Please get that thought under control and don't let something that is far from the truth ruin how you are and how you look at things. Believe me by you doing this myTake so honestly from the heart shows the inner strength you have, my only wish is I knew your username, going anonymous wasn't necessary.
    Excellent myTake nonetheless!

    • Anonymous

      Kind lady, I highly appreciate your kind words with wisdom! I'd gladly show myself to you but I risk being exposed :/
      You know... the more know, the less the safety of being anonymous it is.

  • kestrelkil

    Dude this is so un healthy its beyond the pale. I cry in front of my girlfriend and guess what now we are married and have 2 kids. She left get, dont blame the crying as the reason, and if it was great you escaped a shitty person

    • Anonymous

      You're right. That heartless bitch is now blocked and deleted from my end. She's forgotten history. Now it's time to bloom in life and there's room for a proper girlfriend worthy of my love and tears ☺

  • -Asca-

    I find it strange to just assume she left you because she saw you crying one single time. Men cry too, that is not a secret or something most women are unaware of.
    I mean what you told sounded like she actually responded positively, she even came to you, you cuddled, and she was there for you when you were crying.
    Then two weeks later she just leaves. Well, sucks, but what exactly made you think it was because yoi cried?

    • Anonymous

      It didn't take long until she ghosted me, so I have a close association with that. Besides she never told me, so all I am left is with assumptions.
      Either way that's one less problem for me to worry about. She is in fact toxic based on how it all went after the crying and I don't negotiate with toxic bitches. I lost nothing but a lying bitch. Good for me.

  • Ac211

    It's a good thing to cry in front of ur girlfriend cause it shows her u really care in my opinion. I remember this one girl I used to date I forgot what we were talking about but I started crying in front of her and tbh that made our relationship even stronger. Never be scared to express ur emotions cause if u don't ur girl will second guess y'all relationship and also her self esteem will drop really low.

    • Anonymous

      Makes sense. Crying is our "shit test" we have for women.

  • Likes2drive

    I never had this happen when crying in front of them, they stayed with me and was happy to see some emotion from me since I’m not as affectionate as I should be. I think she left because she couldn’t handle you in that way and I’m sure she felt bad leaving you but probably thought it was best. I’m sorry you went through all that though but definitely don’t cry if she does because that’s when she wants us to be strong at the moment

    • Anonymous

      She's toxic and unworthy. I'll find myself a better and worthy lady of my love and tears.

    • Yeah you just need a good woman and I hope you find her

    • Anonymous

      Thank you, brother!

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  • kespethdude

    Any woman who dumps a man for crying is a "C U Next Tuesday" anyway and she will never find her true love anyway. You're better off with either one who will tolerate crying or become a MGTOW (only if you live in a place where no such woman exists who isn't also the anti-man types you mentioned earlier).

    • Anonymous

      I agree!

  • GD360

    It's okay to show emotion we are all human. That's why it's better to be around family in these type of situations rather then your girlfriend, because family love usually most of the time isn't questionable. Rarely do you find a die-hard girlfriend that stick with through thick and thin. Hang on there bro, life's a bitch, but sooner or later you'll make her your bitch 😎

    • Anonymous

      Naw, she's trash. In my life there's no room for trash but there's room for a proper girlfriend now 😎
      Well, the good news is that I dodged a bullet.

  • LMNOP123

    That chick was just a lying bitch. Don't let one bad grape ruin the bunch! I wouldn't care if any dude of mine cried. We're all human.

    • Anonymous

      Good to know!

  • MilkiiStrawberriis

    Did you know it's actually more damaging and mentally unhealthy to bottle up your emotions whereas if you cry you're letting that steam out.
    It's like microwaving something. If you keep the lid shut then a whole lot of steam with stay trapped in and eventually leave it to bursting, whereas if you left a hole for the steam to be let loose then it will won't burst.

    • Anonymous

      I know.

  • Joker8

    People would say "oh but if they love you their view won't change even if they see you crying" but actually this take is very true and happened to me also... I cried infront of my girlfriend and her attitude changed towards me after a while... women prefer to do the crying in a relationship and have their man comfort to them so when a man cries a woman subconsciously feels that he can't support her if he can't support himself... Great take 👍.

    • Anonymous

      See that's exactly what I'm talking about mate!
      Doomed if you don't cry. Doomed if you do cry. Ain't life a bitch. There's simply no winning 😂
      Just sit back and enjoy the show.

  • Jager66

    I like strong women, if she can't handle male humanity then she can fuck right off.

    my advice, don't be bitter!!! be thankful you avoided a bullet man! imagine if you had kids with her or got married?

    • Anonymous

      You got it! She's toxic and unworthy. I blocked and deleted her on my end. She shall be forgotten history. I'll find myself a better and worthy lady of my love and tears.

  • Mickey9999

    My late husband cried in front of me plenty of times. Now mind you plenty interns of being a man. We were together 24 years so maybe saw him cry a dozen times of varying strength and duration. Now the man I’m interested in just told me he cried at a funeral Thursday and I said good, it’s better than holding it in and it’s a stress reliever that he definitely needs. After a few replies back and forth he finally shut down which i expected because that’s him. But it left me thinking, then why tell me in the first place? Was it a test? Was he expecting me to judge him? I’ve raised a son and a daughter and they both cried when their father died. I’ve raised my son to know it’s ok to cry and share his emotions even sorrow and fear. So if you can’t cry in front of a girlfriend, then she’s not the one for you

    • Anonymous

      I agree.

  • Juxtapose

    Just because you had one bad experience doesn't mean you should bottle up. Stop trying so hard to impress women anyway, the right woman won't need you to.

    • Anonymous

      I'm not even trying.

  • Bananaman177

    Women trying to convince you to open up and show your emotions is just another one of their many shit tests.

    That's all a woman is, one shit test after another.

    • Anonymous

      Shit! I wish you were wrong but what the hell man. It is what it is.

  • LuWe22

    Don´t cry in front of men also. They will think you are on your period, that you are a crazy bitch or a crybaby.

    • My girlfriend cried in front of me. Or more precisely into my chest at night on a vacation. I comforted her and the next day and all through the next two weeks she was fine. If you truly love and care about someone, crying is not a turn off. It can deepen your relationship, because you can comfort your SO.

    • LuWe22

      @Twalli Yes of course. You can show your feelings in front of your SO. I´m a bit careful with my emotions. I´m working on it to let them show. But I would never cry in front of strangers, coworkers or classmates.

    • Streak

      The wrong type of man thinks those things

    • Show All
  • penguin_14

    If she was true and loyal she would stick by you during your good and bad times and wouldn't leave you just because you cried once.

    • namino

      I do agree with your comment

    • Anonymous

      I agree as well entirely!

  • I dont think it was the fact that you were crying at all more that you were crying over nothing. Hetrosexual women tend to seek out the strongest male possible as their partner. Every woman differs on what they see as strength in a partner and value different strengths more than others, theaw different strengths are all considered& weighed against each other when settling down with a partner. It's a biological instinct within women.
    Although she comforted you seeing you cry like a woman on her period over daily life really triggered those biological instincts that you are emotionally a weak male and she was turned off sexually, it was in her eyes like you are not a man at all.
    My advice when you feel that way is not to weep in a locked room listening to Adele strangling a cat but to go and do some weights or hit the heavy bag.
    https://youtu.be/gCcyQ136LQw

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