You Get What You Give! (Why I Love Being A Traditional Woman :) )

Yads_Is_Back

I'd like to say kudos to @MrOracle for his new take: Why Men Aren’t Committing To Relationships
because it's pretty straight-forward, and UNFORTUNATELY, true.

I think one thing that society - really Western society - misses is that while they're all fussing and complaining about men not wanting to commit and about women wanting to be promiscuous and all that, we traditional families are just sitting back watching and smiling. And I feel weird calling it Western society because I'm from Latin America and it is absolutely NOT the same as it is in the U.S. Here are some examples:

1. We are taught "body over mind."
Yeah, I'm not even kidding. We are taught to be fit for our husband, to be his go-to pleasure, and to be that only for him. Make him feel like a man. When he cries, wipe his tear and tell him how much we love him and how amazing of a man he is and how much we appreciate his hard work. Yeah, to us, toxic masculinity is not valid because, you know, masculinity isn't determined by expressing your emotions. Actually, the more passionate he is the better!

2. Yes, you're supposed to do for your partner.
Did she really just say you should do for your partner?
Uhhmmm... YEAH. Selfishness doesn't make a relationship. A relationship takes two people to make things work, and if any limits are put on it, then it won't last and apparently isn't worth it anyway. We women are taught to do for our men, such as having kids and giving him something amazing to come home to, and the men are taught to provide unconditionally, whatever it takes.

3. Divorce is looked horribly and very negatively upon. One who divorces is evil.
If you're gonna tell a partner wedding vows, at least mean it when you say it. Otherwise you're just blowing smoke, and you can't expect trust from anybody after that. Therefore, we don't sign what's called a "pre-nup" in the U.S. because we are committing to each other for that NOT to happen, so why would we sign for something that we are literally promising won't happen? You're cutting your foot off before you get in the door.

Divorce rates are WAAAAAYYYY lower.

You Get What You Give! (Why I Love Being A Traditional Woman :) )

Woah... What a difference in trend.😯

There are many more but I won't go over all of them tonight. Now let's turn this to the part where men are wrong:

So,

Do men really want to commit to relationships? Most men don't actually decide to want to commit until their late 20s-early 30s. This runs into a problem for men: now the good younger women are taken and married and you're left with whores. Then they complain that they can't commit to a good woman. Well... you brought that on yourself. Try committing earlier to begin with instead of being a whore as well. You get what you give.

However, I've seen men in their early 20s propose to a woman, ready to give it his all. I see this ALL THE TIME where I'm from! Wait... That's totally not normal! No, in countries like the U.S. it's not, because if the woman is wanting to do everything by herself and does not need a man and he doesn't need her, then why should he waste his time? Aren't you people in America doing some kind of thing where the woman proposes to the man now? Okay, well take the lead and let's watch how that goes.
It's not like this where I'm from. Oh no, nothing close. Men (and women) are NEEDED. That means that 99% of the time the man provides and the woman is the childbearer and nurturer. Which is okay... nothing wrong with that... But if we all decided to abandon that, have sex with whomever we want to when we want to, abandon responsibility, dress like we have no idea what "femininity" even is or like we've ever heard the word... let's be real, why WOULD a man want us if we were like that?
Just as we don't want a man who has whored around all during his teens and 20s yet wants us when he's older and ready to settle down. Ummm NO. Next.

So what do I get out of being traditional?
Well I will say that I've had marriage proposed to me by a very good man, I've been asked ABOUT marriage I can't tell you how many times and that's since I was 15, and best yet: men don't disrespect me as much and so many guys are actually nice to me, very respectful for this reason. I know women who love to walk into somewhere almost naked yet then complain about being sexualized. I mean... 😂 Do I get a blown-up inbox and phone with guys being disrespectful? Yeah. Any woman is gonna get that, really. I avoid those disrespectful pervs. But I can say this: I've had many people ask me why men are so nice to me. And it's true; there are plenty of men who have done a lot for me just to show me adoration. And obviously I haven't been into them back, but my point is that the guys who do this tend to be gentlemen. And the ones who aren't usually gentlemen tend to change to it when they're around me.
The lesson here is not that you should be trying to impress other people but that you get what you give. If you give people something to respect, generally that's what you're going to get: RESPECT.

Conclusion: So here's the thing... You get what you give. You can't be a man and trick and deceive women and whore around in your younger years and expect a traditional woman to want to marry you, be good to you, and submit to you like that. You can't be a woman and whore around or dismiss men because you don't need them and expect a man to want to marry you. If you want a more traditional partner, then you need to give that partner what they're looking for - a.k.a. what do you bring to the table? Because as much as men like to push this off on women, men in these countries tend to be the SAME way: wanting better than you deserve.
If you're somebody who prefers to live casually or just has no interest in serious relationships then this post doesn't really point in your direction, so keep it hanging ✌️

Personally, I think a BIG piece of this is humility. It seems like the genders want to live for their own selves and not acknowledge that we need the other. I'll be honest with you: I can't fix a car. I'm not even gonna try because I don't like getting dirty. This would be where my husband comes in, if that situation ever happened. (Actually, I'm not good with my hands at all. I'm no good with manual labor lol) Getting along requires humility, and until our world sees that, we will make no progress.

So although I do agree with MrOracle's mytake, men are no more innocent than women are.

You Get What You Give! (Why I Love Being A Traditional Woman :) )
45
20
Add Opinion

Most Helpful Guys

  • Anonymous
    Amen, sister, including the part about men not being innocent and having unrealistic expectations after whoring around when they are younger. Those guys are as guilty as anyone.

    But MrOracle's mytake was 100% spot on in everything he wrote with respect to why good men are not willing to commit or get married today. For most men, most women are no longer worth the cost, risk and investment that marriage represents for a man today. And if women want a high value man, they will have to be perceived as high value women, and most women today simply are NOT high value TO MEN. They think they are high value because they are educated or have a good paycheck, but they seem clueless to the fact that men do not want the same things in a woman that women want in a man.

    If you honestly consider what a man wants and needs from a woman and marriage, not including sex (which, for better or worse, is easily available to most guys without commitment, and certainly without marriage), and what the risks are to a man today who chooses to get married, the benefits simply no longer even come close to offsetting those risks. And that is pretty sad.

    I know I speak for most high value men when I say I'm grateful there are still some women like you, Yads, who are honest, intelligent and traditionally minded. I'm optimistic that the pendulum will eventually swing back to a place of sanity where there are more women like you, and hopefully before western society collapses. In the meantime, men will continue to give marriage the bird in record numbers.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Thanks for both the honesty and the consideration ❤️

  • This was refreshing to my soul to read. I want a woman like this! It's what my mom was like, and she had six kids. She raised us to value who we were, and to both give and demand love and respect. To know that we always have ways to grow, but that doesn't mean we deserve to be mistreated. At the same time, you have to know what you bring to the table. Sex isn't enough. Marriage is a partnership of two people from the day of marriage till the day they die. And that is exactly what I want.

    It's one of the main reasons why women from more traditional cultures, like Latinas, are so attractive to me. Because they value the roles in the relationship, and they want a really good marriage. Something that will be strong every year. Something that their kids can look back on with pride that their parents did so well and were so humble and genuine to each other. So respectful and real.

    It's what I'm waiting for. It's what I'm looking for. And it's incredibly encouraging to read about women who have this perspective and this day and age when everything is crazy and all good norms are being challenged
    Is this still revelant?
    • Grond21

      Thank you for the MHO! And the other man you gave the MHO to? He nailed it. Better than I said, and he hit so many good points. I would have given him MHO too

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

2043
  • Anonymous
    Truth hurts, but yah, to many degrees, this guy gets it. :) https://www.youtube.com/embed/ziQcJ9Wnfaw
    • Anonymous

      Though I must say, this take was actually pretty good and better than the usual ones of the like.

    • Doesn’t look like something I want to watch lol

    • Anonymous

      May be more geared for guys, but he has a point that's hard to knock down. About the only remaining "traditional" women are among the Amish or in Cuba, Saudi Arabia, North Korea, or the like. Harsh truth. I mean, did you not use internet to be here and dare to speak to other men here besides from your husband/family? That's not traditional. At all. Many traditional texts would say you're a devil spawn for it and worst if you don't go back to the kitchen and kid tending immediately.

    • Show All
  • Anonymous
    "We are taught to be fit for our husband" are men expected to be fit for their wives?
    • Yeah 😂
      Good observation lol

    • Anonymous

      Ok then that's reasonable

  • Anonymous
    some men were not whores in their early 20s... they were just surrounded by whores and wanted a traditional relationship, so decided better to stay single than with the wrong person.

    :(
    • Then it is understandable for those men to be upset. And those men are the smart ones. Uncommon, just like the smart women lol

    • Anonymous

      Yeah I find some solace in the fact that there are many girls out there in the same situation, and really, it's actually easier as a man because men in their late 20s and even early 30s pair well with woman in their early 20s. I'm not wasting my time with any washed up whores, I didn't want em when I was younger I don't want em now.

Loading...