Do you feel like girls expect too much from guys nowadays?

Question

So, I came across this post this morning on Facebook and it kinda got me thinking. I always hear girls talking about how they want a/their boyfriend to surprise them with gifts and take them out for shopping and to pay for God knows what and I actually find it to be pretty sad.
(Sorry If I messed up my English btw^)

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

Actually, since the recession (i. e., since around 2007-2008), women in general have been FAR more reasonable and rational in their expectations of men. By contrast, the 90's and early 2000s had a huge percentage of women who had INSANE expectations...

"I only date men:

- a good-paying job
- with a NEW car
- who own their own house (apartment-dwellers are out of luck!)
- who pay for all dates
- who take me to "nice" (read: expensive) places
- who take me shopping regularly (and pay for everything)
- who buy me "nice" gifts"

You simply wouldn't believe the things that came out of women's mouths back then - granted, the economy was absolutely stupid and people were refi-ing their houses every 6 months and pulling out $50-100k each time and spending it like water - but this led to completely crazy expectations by many, many women.

In the late 2000s, many of those women lost their homes (whether they owned it themselves, or were married, or living with a boyfriend, etc.) and either moved back home or had to share an apartment with someone, and younger women found they couldn't afford to move out of their parents' house in the first place, and it really reset their expectations. Suddenly, a guy without a car, or even without a job, was understandable (the same guy would have been a pariah a few years earlier).

So, coming from that background, the gold-digger, high-expectation types seem rare and moderate to me.

Man_Over_Game · Accepted Answer

Here's the blunt truth of most guys and girls.

Guys are easy, and have to work hard for the relationship. But we are often emotionally detached, and we prioritize hobbies/objects over relationships a lot of the time. We also like more sex than women do, and this can be a defining factor in a lot of relationships.

Almost any woman can pick up pretty much any guy. They aren't considered creepy when they act slutty (a lot of us will just think she's even more attractive instead). They have a harder time spending time alone, which can make them seem more clingy. There are plenty more bisexual/homosexual women than men, which kinda screws up the whole "supply/demand" thing when it comes to relationships.

So I'm not surprised at all that stuff like what you mentioned happens. If girls can afford to be picky, then they're going to be picky. If I could eat any food in the world, why would I eat at McDonald's?

Now that I think about it, it's all kinda fucked up:
Women demand objects from men, and that's considered fairly normal.
Men demand sex from women, and that's considered wrong.
Really, it's the same exact situation.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Everyone has their standards & preferences, if you cannot match what is requested move on, there is always someone else who can.

So many "go for people way out of their league and get pissed when they're not willing to "settle" &/or only go for people whom they have nothing in common with, simply because those people are hot."

Why bother trying to be with someone you're not compatible with?
Think about it, if in high school this girl is looking for expensive things, that is most likely a part of her reality, so its going to be a part of her personality. So, not being able to afford her, is not going to be the only problem, you two most likely won't have much in common.

Cut your losses & date within your price range or get a job & cater to her wishes. You're never going to change her mind, because there are guys who can & will buy her what she wants.

Also, if she comes from a rich family, her family will keep her stocked with whatever she wants & will supply all the avenues she needs to begin making her own money.

You're fighting a losing battle.

thedevilwithin · Accepted Answer

Some girls have this warped delusion that gifts mean something. Considering world history, women were commodities to be sold off, paying for them was once a thing.
It's old social norms mixed with major major advertising manipulation, that makes girls who expect to be brought and guys who expect to pay for them so common and also so fucking unbelievably pathetic.
Sometimes i think the whole world is one steaming pile of suckiness filled with the most stupid people in existence and the best thing for all of us would be if a black hole swallowed everything up.

Sorry if this is a bit melodramatic, been one of those days...

Badfish_NFKA · Accepted Answer

Not all girls are the same. Some girls want it all. Me, personally.. I value the little things. I don't need items, i need time and affection. Ambition and communication. You can buy things together but can you build together? I mean I'm a female, and that's all i want. I dont need gifts, texts every second of the day and a thousand calls a day or all your money. Just time. Communication. Happiness. Sex. Lol. It just depends on the girls your going after.

udolipixie · Accepted Answer

Do you feel like girls expect too much from guys nowadays?
B. No

If anything I find gals expect far less financially. In the past gals depended on guys for financial survival with males as the sole provider. Nowadays most households are two income.

wellokthen · Answer

I have a hard time understanding how we have a society where men and women are (and should be) considered equals along with this entitled notion that a man is expected to work hard and "get their shit straight" for the purpose of buying "expensive shit" for their girlfriends or wives!

You really DON'T get it both ways! You don't get equality but then get to hold on the notion that women should be treated as a special class of citizen simply because they are women! We are EQUALS now! Men can help with housework, cook, change diapers and women can change the flat tire on their SUV and fix the leaky sink.
The notion that women should be spoiled just for being women is frankly a sexist mindset that stems from a belief that they ARE the "weaker" sex, so it's proper that the "stronger" sex take care of them.

In this age of equality, there is nothing wrong with a woman wanting to be spoiled and treated specially occasionally. What we forget is, that goes both ways! Maybe women should occasionally spoil their man as well! Get your "shit straight" save some money and buy HIM some "expensive shit" that he might want! Shocking huh?

It won't change until guys take stand and stop putting up with this, either by dating women who truly see themselves as equals or by refusing the types of attitudes in the Facebook post above.

stubbsy · Answer

A girl should have certain expectations from their guy, but more so in the area of respect and non financial effort, like making them feel as if they are their priority and that they never try and demand or control, but financial praise should never be a womans priority, because this is easy for a guy to do, but that's when you start being controlled and demanded from, because guys find it disrespectful of women to expect a financial gain, we like to use our finances to surprise and treat our women. If a woman takes this away, we struggle with what else we might be able to do, x

RandomUsername3464 · Answer

Not all girls/women are like that, but yes, it seems like many of them do indeed expect too much from guys. My biggest complaint about this is that they expect guys to provide for them, but they also expect guys to be complete gentlemen, question nothing, completely accept them in every way, and just basically tow the line, and ask for NOTHING in return.

Now, if a guy wanted this out of a girl, there would be an endless stream of "omg you are entitled, women don't you owe anything hurrrrr" replies coming in. The very fact that this double standard exists means that something is wrong. Female entitlement is just as much of an issue as male entitlement. Now lets get on with all the negative replies and downvotes.

RationalMale · Answer

What I wonder is why

Girl: "I want a tall, fit, handsome, funny guy who has a good job and treats me like a princess."

People hear that and their reaction is,
www.reactiongifs.us/.../cheering_minions.gif

Guy: "I want a cute, fit girl with long hair who is sweet and feminine."

People hear that and their reaction is,
media3.giphy.com/media/AT631VU1Fw208/giphy.gif

Adraido · Answer

I definitely believe so. I'm 26 and I have a job and have my own place. That's far from enough for girls my age who demand that I be tall, white, have enough cash to get married, initiate first contact, be extroverted, master of conversation and dress formal just to be "boyfriend material" It's unrealistic. I can certainly pay my share but my expectations is just are to just find a girl who stick with me through thick and thin. I saw this even when I was 19. It's been nearly a decade and things have gotten worst even with this economy. When I was 19 they expected me to have a job and be outta my parents' house. Which were still weird expectation, especially that young.

jaydogs1990 · Answer

The girlfriend had this kinda attitude probably from too many chick flicks. She got the shock of her life when we moved in together and rent, electric, heating, tv licence, phone, internet, groceries, car, car tax, car insurance, car mechanics, diesel tyres etc all had to be paid for and that I was insisting on all household bills split equally between us after all it isn't the fifties and women can earn money now and I am not her father and she's no longer at the hotel of mom and dad. Every week I put my half on the table and if she came up short it was either get it or get out. Then it was "but you make more money than me" and I was like then get a real job that pays money and dont turn it down because you dont like and its too hard. Personally women have to decide what way they want it as they can't have it both ways. Its either equal rights or its back to traditional values.

Riverock · Answer

Well that poll isn't at all one sided. :P

I do think they expect too much. It's not their fault. Just as guys are influenced by films they watch, women see romantic films/shows where guys do all sorts of ridiculous unrealistic stuff for them all the time.

BertMacklinFBI · Answer

well it was always like that though, ever since the 70s, even the girls in high school wanted expensive jewelry from their boyfriends. not like it actually happens all the time, the girl realizes having a nice boyfriend is more than good enough.

mooky06 · Answer

I agree. I think it's got to do with how life was back in the day. Very traditional, very proper. I think it just followed through, with some altering and some strong opinion from both genders, we still fall back on those traditions decades and decades ago.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes. Women expect more from men these days. I am not trying to mean here, but this is why men only want to hit it and quit it with women. It seems like women get bored very easily with men and discard them like they are nothing. Has happened to me a few times. Sometimes women run hot (meaning they are interested in you) and then they run cold (meaning they are not interested in you) and then they alternate between these 2 extremes, which can be perceived as "playing games".

This is why I'm still a virgin XD. Anyway... seriously... I have met so many women that have NEVER been on a date with a guy... but they already had sex. How can you form a relationship without going on dates? A lot of women try to hide the fact that they hook up... but more women are doing it.

RJGraveyTrain · Answer

I think there are a lot of women who do and a lot of women who don't; this is the issue of generalizing, while it is a good way to compartmentalize, it offers a lot of room for argument and interpretation. I think that it's honestly more common for both genders to have expectations that too high due to poor socialization and representation in society along with the media and other informational outlets.

justbanANNAz · Answer

look definitely in general i do, but i mean I'm still gonna have my standards because theyre realistic and i dont ask for too much. if a guy doesn't like that, no problem. he can move onto the next girl with different standards.

SarahsSummer · Answer

I think guys put that pressure on themselves. Just be nice, attentive and caring. Most girls don't that age don't expect expensive things and if they do you don't want them. Just slow an effort to make them happy and comfortable.

CapricornSwagL · Answer

I can pay for my own shit. The only thing I want my guy to do is
1. Not be sexist
2. Respect me as a person
3. Not cheat (want to go to strip clubs, watch porn etc)
4. Be attractive (face, abs, and muscular arms (not too muscular)
5. Have his own money to buy stuff for himself (we can split everything or take turns)
6. Can be sweet
7. Love to cuddle

That's it. Not hard at all

GirlScout · Answer

Girls, yes. Girls will think like this, stupid young girls... but there are an equal amount of stupid young boys to date them, leave them to it.

Kilik147 · Answer

This is so right man at age and 19 this man suppose to be getting all his priorities together and being full well stable before he can take care of any women that she expect this guy to do if you Ask me I think the women do ask for a lot especially if were expecting the same back I mean I want to be surprise too it should work both ways 50/50 if I had to do something for you I should get the same back right guys that's showing love and caring about one another.

pr3ttybr0wn · Answer

You can't expect a young guy to be able to do all that. Maybe take you out to dinner at red lobster or buy u a cute teddy bear but most guys are not rich and really can't. As long as he treats you nicely and makes an effort

TheDevilInside · Answer

That's what you get when you decide to go after and date stupid, immature girls.

Look for maturity and inner beauty, guys, the she wouldn't expect you to take care of her because she can take care of herself.

Anonymous · Answer

My girl honestly never asked for much. just some attention and sex every now and then, she knows I'm busy and well she understands but I do go out of my way to see her even for 30 minutes every two days or so and date night every Friday or Saturday, soundss pretty reasonable to me

Hopefuldreamer8 · Answer

I just want a guy to like me. Most don't because I am not attractive. If there is one who does like me, he hasn't told me. So far though, I've never been in a relationship. If a guy ever wants to be with me, I'll never expect anything from him except mutual love and respect. I make good money myself, I don't care about money.

FatherJack · Answer

@bubblegumlover99 ... You certainly seem to have a balanced & mature head on your shoulders for 16 , I would say the honest answer is a resounding yes. The poison from the " media " has a huge effect , especially on you ladies. My own 9 yr old daughter stated " I love being a girl , we get treated better & get more stuff ! " Can't argue there at all !!

heartattack25 · Answer

Not really. Girls that age don't ask much. Unless it is a special case. Even women in their twenties and thirties don't ask that much these days. So this girl is the exception rather than the rule.

iamyourneighbor · Answer

I think you should not generalize all women. Some Men and women expect too much from their partner which is why some men and women stay single because they think the person is not good enough for them

Mustachekitteh · Answer

Some do and some don't. Just depends on the person and their ideals.  For me I honestly rather spoil the guy, surprise him, and pay for stuff.

ConsultantIsBack · Answer

You are going to go far in life with this level of wisdom

Kirah · Answer

Yes, they do. A lot of girls are far too picky and demanding.

Anonymous · Answer

Well, it's funny, the "rules" only seem to apply to certain guys. Some guys, the sort of suave don't-give-a-fuck guys who are funny, they can do whatever they want and still have girls offering them pussy. Most guys, though, have to jump through quite a few hoops to make girls happy, especially the young ones. They give up a lot of those unrealistic expectations when they get older.

CountVronsky · Answer

Yes, girls expect too much from guys. Anyway, that answer of "y'all expect to much... before his main concern is you" is wrong also, because the main concern of a man should never (and will never) be his wife, no matter how romantic that sounds.

dudeman · Answer

right now its a weird time in history. the relationship dynamics between men and women are at a pivoting point and many men are finding women to be obsolete for anything other then sex and reproductive purposes.

JayneW · Answer

i just expect mutual respect. yes it's nice to be spoilt sometimes but i don't expect that and it's not a condition or basis for a relationship.

Sean_is_Awesome · Answer

I hate the sence e of entitlement many girls have nowaday. Like a girl who is really fugly in our grade was saying that this guy she was asked about was to fat when he is only chubby but she is really obese. Also, some girls bring nothing to the table really but a pussy and expect a big dick, money, a good job, money to spend on them, and etc. I know some a lot of guys expect good looks and a good body, but that's not an overwhelming amount of things

JustinCaseUDontKnow · Answer

I can't say all girls expect lot from a guy but will say some want things that their boyfriends can't afford to give them but i look for real love within a girl that means more to me but if she wants lot things she would have to wait..

chrisbigman · Answer

I suppose sometimes, I do. But I'm sure some guys expect too much from girls, too.

gobsmacked3 · Answer

LOL!!! I actually think they do not demand nearly enough :)

Alecu · Answer

Relationships now are based more on what you can give for her than if you can both feel good together and have a shoulder to cry on or a companion to keep you going in life.

Maverickj · Answer

Not just these days, it's always been like that. It's getting very tiring. If you're not at least 6'5, rich, hot, incredibly dominant and assertive, you won't even get as much as a passing glance from 99% of women.

TripleAce · Answer

Yup very true But when i was that age i never experienced that.. maybe i just had a good crowd.. we all shared what we had

Anonymous · Answer

The problem is that feminists have emasculated men, and now women can never get what they really want - a manly man.

GreatnessPersonified · Answer

Young women have always been unreasonable from the dawn of time.  They get more reasonable with time and experience.

apexalpha · Answer

Those girls that are demanding these things see how their mothers get spoilt by the father and expect the same treatment from some broke teenager #Unrealistic

abc3643 · Answer

... and this is why men go to sites for foreign women.

GKangaji97 · Answer

amen! plus wtf are the girls doing to compensate it

Anonymous · Answer

Nope most girls now go for looks more then money ofc some are gold diggers so they go for money but most go for looks if u are hot and poor u gonna find girl easier then who is ugly and rich

At least its like that in my country

Anonymous · Answer

I just think girls don't know how it is, being a guy, that's all

Anonymous · Answer

maybe not all women do that but women generally expect more than men. give us a bj and we're happy, but girls want fancy weddings, gifts, flowers and a bj on top of that

Akira94 · Answer

I think girls do expect a lot these days but I blame the media for setting unrealistic standards for men and women.

Phoenix98 · Answer

Pretty wise for a 16 year old.

jjmarvin · Answer

I've never had that expected of me, granted my experience with dating is low

Anonymous · Answer

yeah 90% teenage girls are brainwashed by facebook media if you didn't know 99 % facebook pages are made just for advertising, but you don't even know.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm broke all I have is love and affection. Take it or leave it.

madokh · Answer

yes some girls expect that not all of them

Keyspirits · Answer

@missnowhere @cinderelli i would nvr take y'all out unless its to the ball game in ma bedroom 😋

Sara413 · Answer

Some do. Most don't.

ArchDruidMordred · Answer

It's more an issue of looks nowadays.

Sammy256 · Answer

I dont expect ENOUGH!! My problem.

Anonymous · Answer

Lol, there's still hope in the world ;)

kiler1000 · Answer

The issue here are standards.

Anonymous · Answer

That's why I date older men lmao

James19 · Answer

Well it depends

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