I hate that my boyfriend occasionally smokes weed?

Question

I am in a wonderful relationship with the guy that I think could be the man of my dreams. Everything about him is perfect and we love each other so much. The only thing that constantly bothers me... is that he is into weed (once a week) and he has a little e-cigarrette. We are still in college. In his first year of college before we started dating, I would say he did weed pretty often. He came home for the summer and stopped because he said he didn't need it anymore. Now that we are back in school and he feels more stressed, he does it once a week. He says it helps him calm down and helps him relax so much better. He said he honestly just prefers to do it by himself so he can truly relax and think. I just have a hard time understanding it. When I was growing up, I was constantly taught that it was a bad unhealthy habit. I really am trying to understand it, but it is hard to associate weed and e-cigs with the word "good". He'll use the e-cig a little throughout the day to get a "buzz". That has never really affected me but I'm trying to understand it all. Honestly I wish he wouldn't do it. I don't want to judge because I know different people have different ways of relaxing. I just want him to be healthy and safe. It makes me a little nervous sometimes. Any advice would be great.

AlexanderZ · Accepted Answer

Well, sounds like you really like the guy, so you're probably going to just want to deal with it. On the plus side, weed isn't the most unhealthy thing in the world. From what I know, it's better for you than tobacco. Now, I think a lot like you about this - I personally think smoking is rather disgusting - same for most things of the sort - but I realize that it isn't a particularly 'bad' thing for people to use if - it's just against who I am and my beliefs, and that has nothing to do with others. In terms of dating, I'd probably feel kinda turned away by people who do drugs or smoke, but if I happened to fall in love with someone like that - I'd probably cope with it - although I'd probably not be all that willing to be around them when they're doing something like that.

TriTree · Accepted Answer

I used to do it heavy. I've slowed with it considerably, generally only around people I'm comfortable with, a social thing. It's really not that bad and helps in many ways, like a person said previous it helps against cancer, it also can do the same for anxiety, depression and some other ailments, this is for most... there's many pros with weed, look them up, yes, there are also cons. Id say if you really like this guy try it with him, but don't make it a habit thing unless you're able to still be productive. It can help bond, things become better with it, food, tv, etc. I'm sure he's "safe" with it so don't worry too much.

mermaidrocketship · Accepted Answer

There's a reason we grew up hearing, Just say no. Drugs, not even alcohol, have proven good for you once legalized. You have valid concerns about his health. Let's remember that alcohol and pot are legal bc the cost of enforcement had run too high. How you respond to his position depends on what you value in this relationship. Do you want someone who loves you and challenges your thinking? Or do you want someone who loves you and shares your values? And is recreational drug use against your core beliefs? Are you compromising yourself by being in this relationship?

RuthAnn1781 · Accepted Answer

Weed isn't dangerous at all really so don't worry about that too much. If I were you, I'd be a lot more concerned with the e-cigarette, those things can blow up and popcorn lung doesn't sound all that fun either. I don't want to give the wrong advice, weed isn't for everybody, but if I were you, I'd maybe consider trying it. It does help you relax and you feel all tingly and weird and it's pretty nice.

trinity12 · Accepted Answer

Do some research, I was in a realtionship for a year and didn't know he smoked. I was the same way you are and now I understand that it's not like he's drunk or impaired. He's the same guy just relaxed. Let him smoke :)

sineater8 · Answer

Trust me, this is a far better habit then drinking alcohol, smoking ciggerates or bottling up all his stress and frustration.

weed has little or no effect on your long term health despite the propaganda you have been feed. In fact it has a lot of beneficial properties and people like you and me who don't use it are in the minority these days.

Considering he can control how much he smokes and only does it casually i think it is fine and your getting worked up over nothing. I know a lot of guys who can't go a hour with out smoking and do nothing but blaze all day and waste their lives, the fact he is only using it to cut through stress from school is actually a pretty healthy stress management tactic. After all, how do you deal when your stressed out?

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

I smoke maybe once a month or whenever I need to do some boring chores. It's non-addictive, actually kills cancer, and you don't see stoners acting a fool in the streets like the morons that pile out of bars a 2 in the morning... so I'm like, meh, whatever when it comes to weed.

My only beef with weed is when I run into that particular type of people, we all know them. They have some weed and HAVE TO SMOKE as if it were crack or heroin. They abuse the hell out of it and think they are looking cool or gangsta. I know they're just being trend chasers and trying to look like their rap heros... but it does get annoying. Then again anything in excess from others can be annoying.

georgespr · Answer

a subject that stands 2 reason gorgeous. yes weed we were all taught was a negative and a gateway drug. but in 2days society we have come 2 realise that in some people it stimulates the mind and or helps with stress and depression. did u know that when it was legalised in colorado the state saved 2 million dollars in medicaid alone due to people smoking instead of meds? i know u dont like it and ide tell him 2 keep it 2 himself and not around u. but i wouldn't worry about weed so much. its the heavier drugs that are ruining our women men and relationships. he should consider himself lucky 2 have a beautiful woman like u worry 4 him. stay u. ur wonderful

Presto · Answer

Once a week is hardly a habit. Sounds like a phase. Maybe its more and you dont know. I've been smoking for 20 years and i haven't seen anyone smoke once a week. It helps me relax and sleep. You sound like a sweet girl and he's lucky you care about him. If it bothers you maybe there is another way to get him to unwind.

topi_tonge · Answer

to keep away from weed, he should have habit of consuming vitamin C and sulphur, as read in newspaper
www.google.co.in/search
make pieces of amla ( should be bigger in size ---5,6 pieces can be made from each Amla) and apply common salt to it!
let it dry completely in afternoon sunlight ! when it is fully dried , give it to him to chew whenever he gets an urge to smoke weed !

prepare lots of those dried nuts which are called Amla supaaari.

loveout · Answer

Just educate yourself with the pros of the plant and its medicinal purposes. You can easily dial back some of that prejudice by becoming less ignorant. Just think, it was hammered into you it's bad with no need for proof, just the trust in your friends and family that they're telling the truth and you bought it. You can change your perspective through new information. You're right to believe there is some risk, but it's not all bad news.

normalice · Answer

weed is probably the safest drug out there. More people die from Tylenol than weed. I would not trust what you were 'taught while growing up.' There's a whole bunch of political drama over the prohibition of marijuana, the bottom line of which is that a number of people are getting extremely rich off of it being illegal. And by rich I mean so rich that spending a few million to work anti-marijuana ideas into local school curriculum across the nation would be pocket change.

Cammy137 · Answer

It's really not that bad for you. If he smokes it with tobacco then that is the biggest health risk to him. If it starts to interfere with his day to day life then that's the point you should be concerned. Using it as for stress relief is completely understandable. I smoked weed at uni to deal with the stress and it helped me immensely

ADFSDF1996 · Answer

As long as it doesn't affect his health (physical and emotional) and your relationship with him, try ignore it for now. However, if your relationship with him continues to evolve then try to convince him to seek a less controversial alternative like drinking tea (chamomile, Passion flower, Valerian, St. John's wort etc) all those teas can offer calming benefits but of course he should ask his doctor before drinking them.

TheWantToKnowGuy · Answer

Honestly I don't get why people smoke weed, it burns on the way in, makes you see things all weirdly, and munchies. But it is used as a medicine for some health issues (cant remember what tho) so in small amounts it can be healthy. In my oppinion if I wanted to relax, I'd go to the gym and tire myself out completely, then Id go to the pool and go to bed for some awesome sleep.

the-mad-german · Answer

Well you got 2 options:

1- Live with it
2- Argue about it

but keep in mind weed is a drug and he will have a hard time to get away from it. And i also dont really belive he smoke it just once a week... i never know a shithead who just smokes once a week...

Danny_dan92 · Answer

Seriously I don't wanna come off as an asshole but you have fucken problems or you are trolling everyone on here.

But lemme make this clear, this boyfriend is not the man of your dreams if you find yourself hating things about him that make him HIM. You have some soul searching to do

glasgowdude · Answer

Some people drink.. some smoke weed... some do both to excess... humans are experimental beings.. it's the excessive experimenting that gets us into bother.. if it really bothers you then tell him it's the weed or you... your opinion won't change and if he won't then it's a lost cause and will only lead to arguments. .!!

Maxemeister · Answer

My advice is not to try to change him, that's forcing him to be a different person for your gain. Now, you probably don't WANT to do that, and that makes you a good person, but just try to avoid forcing him to do anything at the expense of your relationship. If you must leave, then you can do it, but don't enforce anything

kayakkyle46 · Answer

Its better than being a drunk. Its the equivalent of having 3 beers one night a week. E-cigs are a habit though. Not that big a deal but I understand being annoyed. An ultimatum to stop would probably not go over well. Just tell him not to do it in front of you.

IdkSomethingRandom · Answer

Chill, dw about it. Weed isn't the equivalent to heroine, like we were taught. It's better than cigarettes or booze. Bad, but better. If it keeps em from addictive substances and depressants, I say live and let live.

ATuairiscean · Answer

My view on these things is how does it affect him and his life in general. If there is no negative things standing out well and good.

vjedi · Answer

I wouldn't worry about it too much unless you see it negatively affecting his life. Like failing at his responsibilities or being lazy. Most likely he will grow out of it.

neoagent1 · Answer

If you're that concerned about it and he won't stop he's not the man of your dreams.

JuanFrank7 · Answer

I'm not into smoking but I like weed and have done it before so I see no prob

MidnightCowboy · Answer

Weed is one of the safest drugs out there. Not dump someone, because they smoke weed

Anonymous · Answer

It's once a week, it's fine. It's bad for the lungs but at least (unlike cigarettes) it does have some health benefits too. It's like chocolate, is unhealthy but eating it once a week won't kill you

HarryMcBeardson · Answer

Smoking weed (pure) once a week is healty for body and mind because it denies stress. And stress is 89% main cause of any mayor sickness.

Sabretooth · Answer

either he needs to quite or you need to leave before things get complicated

Glen68 · Answer

There is much worse things he could be doing to relax then just the occasional weed

Passinggas · Answer

I dumped a girl over that crap

Anonymous · Answer

I would leave a guy who smokes weed

bondobilly · Answer

You smoke, drink, shop, have a lot of shoes?

kenjaminSlutton716 · Answer

Weeds for loosers get nothing done and act stupid

Browneye57 · Answer

Cut him loose. You'll make his life a living hell.

I hate that my boyfriend occasionally smokes weed?

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