i guess you might of crossed the line a little by bringing it up in a consistent manner.
but nothing to feel horrible about, is not like you demanded her to lose weight, starve herself, get surgery without her consent or put ultimatums on her. maybe she'll get over it with time but on the meantime try not to bring it up again and see how it works
I don't think you can fix this. You shouldn't have said all those things to her, comparing her to other girls, and all those fake plastic girls you've probably seen online. It's hard to get rid of hurtful things from your head that's been said to you. 😤 I don't think you deserve her. You might do the same bullshit again.
Ok. What you did isn't wrong but your delivery was wrong. You have to understand, we as men everyone says we suck and we have to compete and earn our confidence.
Women are raised to have false confidence. They can literally sit on the couch and yell fuck you at anyone and eat chips till they weigh 400lbs... and men and women will continue to tell them they are perfect princesses and shouldn't change for anyone.
As a man we know NO SHIT we dont have a perfect nose or physique or intelligence or whatever. And we just grow up that way. Girls grow up being told they are total hotties and gorgeous even if they are lumpy and plain.
So while its GOOD to bring her bloated head back down to reality, you have to be gentle and compassionate about it and build her self esteem back up in things that she actually deserves to be proud about herself. All you did was make her cry and feel worthless.
Well, you have learned a valuable lesson. Women are very sensitive about their breasts, just like men about their penises. You have the job on your hands to get things back the way they used to be. A heart to heart talk on the issue, as well as a moratorium on jokes about her breasts and other body parts, would be a good place to start.
where is your heart in all this. Do you really like her that much, are you gunna marry her? Or at the end of the day, is she just another stepping stone? Be honest with yourself... you're making a big mess here
Right so these insecure people and yourself should either drown in your insecurities or get help. Don’t drag other confident and healthy people down with you. I have removed so many friends from my life because they were like that.
My ex was on the same energy. He's single now. Good luck bro, she's probably gonna go for a man who makes her feel desired now lol Im not saying this to be an ass im saying this cause I was in the same situation with my ex, I couldn't even have sex with him anymore lol Id just let her find a man who makes her feel sexy no matter what cause you failed. She sounds honestly miserable, if you can't make yo girl feel sexy than you're already pretty close to loosing her and thats just the facts
Talking of other girls when with her, making comparisons, is rude childish ignorant of her feelings. Common to teens and young adults this behavior destroys relationships. Learn from your mistakes. If you don't this behavior cause future issues. Some of what you said may be common though but it's best never verbalized. Never compare one woman to another it hurts and drives them away.
Uh I don't think I'd ever like being compared to probs or any girl you used to hook up with. I don't even like guys mentioning girls they hooked up with. Ex s are okay bc you had an actual relationship with them but I don't like hearing of girls someone hooked up with, total turn off. I did not read it all, but yeah you went too far and it hurt her not sure how to fix it.
If compliments make you feel good, insults can hurt you, even if it's a joke. Especially if you dont even say joking at the end. But jokes end up with truth in it. And that's hurtful. Hope you learn from your mistakes and never ever joke around like that. Bring in more positivity rather than negativity.
Sounds like a huge FUBAR on your part. You may have get on your knees and beg for forgiveness and sincerely let her know you were a fool for acting the way you did. Ask her what it would take for her to leave all the bad feelings behind and for her to trust you again.
Write down all the things you find attractive in her. Go into intense detail. Give it to her. My girlfriend's ex (they dated for 6 years) joked that he was cheating on her in their first year of dating. Her friends forced him to write her an apology note and it was so heartfelt and feeling that she forgave him. She needs to know what you really think about her body. If you don't see each other that much due to the quarantine, send it to her.
1
0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
The answer is self image. Her self image is poor and needs to change. Unfortunately it takes time and will power for permanent change. I didn't want to answer this question because I honestly think a person educated in the field of psychology would be able to give you insight into what is occurring in your relationship. Yes she needs to heal/change but there is so much more in that paragraph.
Sit down and have a serious talk. Let her know you were wrong and tell her how sorry you are. As someone who has been through this before, it's hard for a girl to recover. We already have so much pressure on us to look a certain way and when the person that is supposed to love us just the way we are points out all our flaws, it cuts VERY deep. Spend some time telling her everything you love about her.
Listen man, you fucked up.. I get what you were trying to do but a lot of people are way more emotional than you think. This could be fixed. But it will take time.
It is better if you really apologize once then never talk about it again. Treat her very very well for the next at least month. And I mean really well. Like a goddess.
At least, you learned to conceal your opinion next time.
There was no need for that. I bet she can list a few things wrong with you, coz I'm sure you aren't Gods gift to ladies. But she has accepted you as is. Before you look at others, consider your own flaws.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
68Opinion
This is either a troll question, or written by a very insecure, controlling, unstable person.
It was the latter due to being cheated on by her. I’m doing a lot better though
"I just wanted to piss her off and make her jealous, she is cute when she is annoyed."
You dug her grave, pushed her in and buried her. I hope you are happy now. Getting her back happy is your job now. Find out how she can forgive you.
i guess you might of crossed the line a little by bringing it up in a consistent manner.
but nothing to feel horrible about, is not like you demanded her to lose weight, starve herself, get surgery without her consent or put ultimatums on her. maybe she'll get over it with time but on the meantime try not to bring it up again and see how it works
i think i can relate to... TRUST.
Trust takes YEARS to build,
SECONDS to break,
and FOREVER to repair.
i can't tell for sure what you gonna need to do in order to cure the situation.
But u gonna need to brace yourself in making her your only world.
I don't think you can fix this. You shouldn't have said all those things to her, comparing her to other girls, and all those fake plastic girls you've probably seen online. It's hard to get rid of hurtful things from your head that's been said to you. 😤 I don't think you deserve her. You might do the same bullshit again.
Might as well leave her and she'll find someone who appreciates her better than you 😒
Ok. What you did isn't wrong but your delivery was wrong. You have to understand, we as men everyone says we suck and we have to compete and earn our confidence.
Women are raised to have false confidence. They can literally sit on the couch and yell fuck you at anyone and eat chips till they weigh 400lbs... and men and women will continue to tell them they are perfect princesses and shouldn't change for anyone.
As a man we know NO SHIT we dont have a perfect nose or physique or intelligence or whatever. And we just grow up that way. Girls grow up being told they are total hotties and gorgeous even if they are lumpy and plain.
So while its GOOD to bring her bloated head back down to reality, you have to be gentle and compassionate about it and build her self esteem back up in things that she actually deserves to be proud about herself. All you did was make her cry and feel worthless.
Well, you have learned a valuable lesson. Women are very sensitive about their breasts, just like men about their penises. You have the job on your hands to get things back the way they used to be. A heart to heart talk on the issue, as well as a moratorium on jokes about her breasts and other body parts, would be a good place to start.
where is your heart in all this. Do you really like her that much, are you gunna marry her? Or at the end of the day, is she just another stepping stone? Be honest with yourself... you're making a big mess here
I wanna marry her
Shouldn’t even treat stepping stones like that
Why are there so many people like you both men and women who go around damaging people’s confidence?
We are insecure
Right so these insecure people and yourself should either drown in your insecurities or get help. Don’t drag other confident and healthy people down with you. I have removed so many friends from my life because they were like that.
Nope you are a piece of trash
My ex was on the same energy. He's single now. Good luck bro, she's probably gonna go for a man who makes her feel desired now lol Im not saying this to be an ass im saying this cause I was in the same situation with my ex, I couldn't even have sex with him anymore lol Id just let her find a man who makes her feel sexy no matter what cause you failed. She sounds honestly miserable, if you can't make yo girl feel sexy than you're already pretty close to loosing her and thats just the facts
Talking of other girls when with her, making comparisons, is rude childish ignorant of her feelings. Common to teens and young adults this behavior destroys relationships. Learn from your mistakes. If you don't this behavior cause future issues. Some of what you said may be common though but it's best never verbalized.
Never compare one woman to another it hurts and drives them away.
Uh I don't think I'd ever like being compared to probs or any girl you used to hook up with. I don't even like guys mentioning girls they hooked up with. Ex s are okay bc you had an actual relationship with them but I don't like hearing of girls someone hooked up with, total turn off.
I did not read it all, but yeah you went too far and it hurt her not sure how to fix it.
If compliments make you feel good, insults can hurt you, even if it's a joke. Especially if you dont even say joking at the end. But jokes end up with truth in it. And that's hurtful. Hope you learn from your mistakes and never ever joke around like that. Bring in more positivity rather than negativity.
Sounds like a huge FUBAR on your part. You may have get on your knees and beg for forgiveness and sincerely let her know you were a fool for acting the way you did. Ask her what it would take for her to leave all the bad feelings behind and for her to trust you again.
Well there’s two ways you went wrong there.
A. Never joke or make fun of her boobs.
B. Never compare her to other women.
Those are the quickest ways for you to lose a girlfriend. Hope this helped.
Preach 🙌🙌
Write down all the things you find attractive in her. Go into intense detail. Give it to her. My girlfriend's ex (they dated for 6 years) joked that he was cheating on her in their first year of dating. Her friends forced him to write her an apology note and it was so heartfelt and feeling that she forgave him. She needs to know what you really think about her body. If you don't see each other that much due to the quarantine, send it to her.
The answer is self image. Her self image is poor and needs to change. Unfortunately it takes time and will power for permanent change. I didn't want to answer this question because I honestly think a person educated in the field of psychology would be able to give you insight into what is occurring in your relationship. Yes she needs to heal/change but there is so much more in that paragraph.
What happened was that this bloke was literally bullying his girlfriend and therefore making her insecure. This is not harmless humour, this is vile.
Sit down and have a serious talk. Let her know you were wrong and tell her how sorry you are. As someone who has been through this before, it's hard for a girl to recover. We already have so much pressure on us to look a certain way and when the person that is supposed to love us just the way we are points out all our flaws, it cuts VERY deep. Spend some time telling her everything you love about her.
Listen man, you fucked up.. I get what you were trying to do but a lot of people are way more emotional than you think. This could be fixed. But it will take time.
It is better if you really apologize once then never talk about it again. Treat her very very well for the next at least month. And I mean really well. Like a goddess.
At least, you learned to conceal your opinion next time.
There was no need for that. I bet she can list a few things wrong with you, coz I'm sure you aren't Gods gift to ladies. But she has accepted you as is. Before you look at others, consider your own flaws.