If your s/o tries to change who your are, is breaking up the best solution?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend & me have been together for two years. He's very social and extroverted while I'm very introverted and love being on my own.
His parents and sister are even more extroverted and basically talk non stop. They complained to him about me 'cause I'm too quiet for their liking. He told me they've never met anyone who is more quiet than him.

We've had several discussion about me being too quiet and he even accused me of holding him back which never even happened. We went to parties several times, I never complained about him inviting friends over, we always try to do several activities when we go out, etc. Before his friends come over he often tells me to be friendly while I've never been unfriendly. He also asked if I could try to be as comfortable as when I'm with my best friends (friends I've known for >10 years vs his friends I've only seen 5 times). I don't mind coming out of my comfort zone but it just feels like he expects me to change completely and turn into a person I'm not.
I may be quiet but I'm not the one who is impulsive and doing things 'cause he feels pressured because of his friends.

Yes

No

[opacarophile]

I believe that if you two really love each other, you can meet halfway. How about you try to be more sociable a bit more? And also, always communicate to your boyfriend about the boundary when you exactly feel uncomfortable. It should be clear for the both of you. I have a question, when you break up with him because of this, do you feel at peace? How about when you're in a new relationship with an extrovert person again, would you still refuse to socialize? If you can live without your boyfriend, then maybe breaking up is the best option then. I hope you can see the big picture why your boyfriend wanted you to meet new friends, and not to be lonely.

[Anonymous]

"he even accused me of holding him back which never even happened."
"it just feels like he expects me to change completely and turn into a person I'm not."
"cause he feels pressured because of his friends."
all these are causes to leave him. these all scream red flag to me. Especially the last one, if he gets pressured by his friends easily that is an excuse he is trying to use to avoid the subject of him treating you terribly.

[caring__1]

Next thing you know, he'll expect his cat to bark. We are what we are. If he can't appreciate you as you are (you're not broken), find someone who will appreciate you as you are. It's amazing how many people feel entitled to others changing for them, yet they're unlikely to change for others. This is not a compatible relationship, and you are not at fault or doing anything wrong.

[dudeinohio]

I'm an introvert and I was married to an extreme extrovert for 17 years. I was mostly miserable in social settings. She was always on me to change and it drove me to alcoholism and depression and finally divorce when she broke me down to nothing.

[MTC29]

Don't change your personality... change boyfriends.