Guys do you want to have kids in your 30s or 40s? Girls when do you want to have children?

[RavVid]

Seems a lot of women want to defer having children till after their 20s. Is there a mismatch with men's willingness to have children?

I am curious as to how many men want to have children in their 30s or even 40s?

In the 30s/40s a guy is getting into his prime earning years. If you have children then you are looking at supporting them through to at least your early 50s but possibly late 50s or even early 60s.

Add to which you likely will be divorced by the woman after 8 years given that is the average length of marriage and 80% of divorces are initiated by women.

So Guys, do you buy the white picket fence or go shopping for expensive sports cars?

Girls, ideally when do you want to have children?

Never. Don't want children

In my 20s

In my 30s

In my 40s

50's and over

Updates

1 y

Hi all. I would really like more responses, so please help out :)

The reason I posed this question is that I noticed a few questions from girls saying their plan to have children in their 30s wasn't working. Now deferring children till the 30s is sensible for girls with a professional career.

But are men onboard with this reproduction strategy? I deliberately heavily biased this survey to stoke up male fears because they are the fears that need to be overcome to get onboard with it.

[surebruh]

Most Millennials and Gen Z have a world left for us ruined by the boomers passive compliance. We simply don't have the opportunities they had where with no or little education they had a well paying public sector job that they kept for life when everything cost a fraction of what it does now (housing, college tuition , automobiles etc) it is not unrealistic to delay life millstones due to this lag. I myself went to college and had to work in unrelated fields for 8 years to pay bills until an opportunity I picked came along (which didn't last due to horrible working conditions). My concern was never for my abilities with a child but for the environment it was being brought into, rent/bus fare/grocery was barely being paid, how would a child fit in?

[RavVid]

Yes it is difficult. I am not sure I understand all of what you were saying particularly passive compliance. Certainly boomers had it easy. At one time a diploma or degree was good but it isn't now.

What was the field you studied and what field do you work in?

[misogynistic_pig]

Children must be born before the age of 30, at age 30 the chances that the child will be born with down syndrome are 5%.

[RavVid]

Certainly earlier is better from that viewpoint.

[DizzyDesii]

I personally only ever wanted kids in my 20s and i prefer a guy who prefers the same. But im closing in on 30 now. I’m hoping to birth at least one in my 20s. 30+ is just old to me

[Bethany22]

Why do all men seem to know about that stupid 80% divorce rate caused by women statistic. Like where did you find out about that?

[RavVid]

Well it is mostly derived from gov't statistics. There is a difference between separation and divorce to be noted. In Australia the median length (not average) is 8.4 years but it takes another 3. x years for final divorce. Lots of jurisprudence's have a mandatory separation period (in Au one year) before divorce becomes final.

It is difficult to suggest that a marriage lasts 12.2 years when the couple separated at 8.4 years and there was just 3.8 years of bureaucracy after that.

These stats are based on gov't (eg Aust Bureau of Stats above) and are definitive.

Turning to who initiates note there is a difference between who causes and who initiates. Given no fault divorce, 'fault' is not assigned. It takes two to marry but one to divorce. Inherently it is a vaguer concept. The non initiating partner might just recognize inevitability and agree to a joint divorce without at anytime choosing divorce. The initiating partner may be responding to infidelity.
Much vaguer and stats on who initiated are derived by surveys. It could be that women like to say they kicked their dead beat husband to the kerb and post factum over represent themselves.

Certainly numbers of 70 to 80% are being derived. In Australia 70% on ABS stats so that has some authority. In the US it is claimed as high as 90% for college educated women.

Generally these numbers are pretty consistent throughout the western world.

[RavVid]

Also these numbers get splashed in the media a lot in a glorifying and triumphant tones.

[Adaeva]

I intend to get married by age 22 while I am still at or near my peak desirability and have a child by age 25.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

I rather buy a goldfish.

[TheUniqueOne96]

Never. Don't want children.