Do you fear you will never find someone to spend the rest of your life with?

[coachTanthony]

Yes

Nah

[Mr_twoface]

I'm married but didn't settle until I was 37 years old. My wife was 36. I feared for several years that I would not find someone due to the choices I daily took in my life. It was nothing majorly, just the decision whether or not the job was the right one for me, whether having one night stands was causing me to not meet others, or the decisions to travel with friends stopped me from meeting others. Whether or not I exercised, or were socially active or enjoyed family time played also a part in the fear.

And then, when you least expected it, during Covid... I met my wife online and our love for each grew to where it is today. If you never put in the effort, then the fear will sadly turn into reality. As for when someone meets the true one, that is the million dollar question. It can be in college or just before retirement.

[OlderAndWiser]

I have confronted that concern in the past, but I am getting married on April 27, so it's good!

[ChiTown33]

Congrats! @OlderAndWiser

[OlderAndWiser]

@ChiTown33 Thank you, sir!

[sage2021]

I thought I would be spending the rest of my life with my boyfriend who died suddenly four months ago.

He was just going to start his pension retirement and he has Social Security money, plus my check.

And I thought I would be with him, but I guess not.

I don't look to find anyone else at my age. I wouldn't want anyone else. I loved how he loved me. He changed when he started something with my caregiver/helper. His attention went on her. It really hurt me because I knew they were together sneaking behind my back. I could hear them laughing at the door. Something he and I did so well together because we are both funny people.
Now it's over.
RIP Patrick 💔

[coachTanthony]

Sorry for your loss.

[sage2021]

@coachTanthony
Thank you for your kind words coach.

[Cynicaldreamer]

Nah. I've accepted I'm going to wind up alone and be a "dog lady"- and I'm okay with that.

There are far worse things in the world: like being in an unhappy marriage or relationship just for the sake of saying you're with someone, and not single or alone... those are the people I feel sorry for!

[TenderFantasy]

Just the looking itself has already tired me out. My last ex was so judgmental I couldn't even believe the things he was saying to me when he was breaking up with me. It hurt and shocked me a lot and even traumatized me to the point that I don't know if I'd be willing to go through that again honestly. To invest many months of everyday together and make future plans, only to have it blow up in my face and my heart crushed because of something I couldn't control.

People/men these days are VERY judgmental. I don't know how many more HOOPS I have to jump through just to get a relationship that works anymore. When I was younger, I just met men that wanted to use me for one thing, even though I wanted more.

I can't say that I am perfect myself though. I know I got things to improve on. However, I really tried my best with that last relationship and for him to say those hurtful things to me after that just proves that no matter how much you try and care / love someone, if they do not feel the same, it's futile/pointless and you would have invested (not to mention WASTED) countless times, moments, hours with the wrong person and now not only are you OLDER and less fertile than when you started, your heart is also broken in a million sharp pieces to boot.

So with that said, I don't want to say that I WANT to give up, but sometimes, I feel like it's such a treacherous and steep mountain to climb! Maybe I barked up the wrong tree, I really do not know, but all I know is that I DID open up my heart (not to mention my mind) and then it was crushed and taken for granted!

... I hope I do find someone finally. Someone NORMAL. Someone who I am able to rely on to be there for emotional support. But if not, it's not the end of my life..

Disease/cancer/fatal injuries (hell even psychiatric illness and suicide) can kill you, but singleness won't.

[RavVid]

No, because it isn't going to happen people. That 20 year couple is just itching for the empty nest so they can divorce the shit out of each other.

Relationship stats are complex because it is generational. About half of marriages end in divorce but once couples clock over 30 years they are very unlikely to divorce because it is not worth getting out of the chair for it.

30 years plus marriages are fossils of an earlier social regime, and not saying anything about 'spending the rest of your life with' today.

Discount those and the %age of marriages ending in divorce is going to be a lot nearer to 100%. We can see this in other stats. The median length of marriage is 8 years. 50% of those happy smiling brides are unilaterally divorcing by year 8. Then there is another big blip at 20 years on the empty nest.

You are dreaming if you think you will 'spend the rest of your life with'.

[FunkyMonkee]

Yes! after 50-some years of trying and still coming up empty, I've just about given up on it!! And the 3 times I got lucky, they all turned out to be bullshit and time-wasters!! Especially the last one!! 10 years of my life, GONE!! Okay, we had a great time together for most of that decade but, I HAD other offers just after we started getting serious!! if this bitch knew she was gonna start fucking other guys after just 5 years, she should've just left me the fuck alone and let me go after one of the others!!

[sawno]

I do fear that at times since I have already been with the perfect partner but we couldn't make it work. The fear stems from how hard it is to find a girl like her let alone someone single.

Of course I could settle for someone I barely love but then thats not the same and i'd miss my ex. So hopefully I do come across that special girl I can truly deeply love again.

[Screenwriter]

Because I'm older, my chances are smaller. Many people by my age are permanently coupled and have been for a long time. So, I have no idea if I have a good chance. I guess I'll see.

But, I don't live my life in a state of worry. I just keep hoping and I put myself out there.

[aceleon]

not in the sense you think.

yes ifear that but i don't seek or want a mate, i want a friend/brother that will do that with me. brothers till death do us apart and heaven will bring us together again.

[Anonymous]

No. Because I have a lot of people in my life that love and care about me. And with my love of fried food I really don't see me outliving them.😂

But I feel like this question was posed in particular to "partnership". And my answer to that question is I've made my peace with being single. I gave the opposite gender almost 50 years. I'm not bitter but any woman that approaches me now I pretty much think. "Where was this 30 years. Ago, 20 or even 10. I'm not your last stop". No thank you.

I'd rather be alone than with someone who does not really value me and what I bring to the table.

[andreasderjuengere]

There are a few who fear to spend the rest of their lives with ME :D

But they are safe.

Myself... I only fear to ''s. t. r. o. m. l.'' with someone who mutates into a person that she had not been when we got things under way.

[IslaTheWitch]

I don't mind being alone.

But anyway, there are people I'm close with, so even if I don't decide to create a relationship, the chance I will be alone is rather small... to none :D

[milyjohn]

Heck no! I have Amazon Prime!

[BCRanger10]

I did at one point. Now I'm married with three kids.

[Bricealan]

After the divorce and once long term relationship, I am happy living alone and have several friends that I enjoy their company

[Miristheiss]

Married, 2 kids.

I felt like that on occasion when I was single.

[FreyaRed]

Nope.

Seriously, life partner, soulmate... whatever. I'm not 13 anymore.

[CalmUntilAbused]

I wouldn't really call it a fear anymore. It's simply a certainty.

[Flower7]

I don’t plan on finding anyone, but that is what I want, so I have no fear about it.

[electromagnetic]

I did. Sometimes I still do since life is not guaranteed to anyone.

[sheikalana]

I used to feel this way in the past but I already found my forever person.

[HawkPerception]

Yeah. Seems to be that it's likely to happen at this point in my life.

[Anonymous]

Sometimes. I do believe that there's someone special out there for me, I just haven't met that person yet though.