Why do men still want kids these days?

[Anonymous]

This is a serious question, and I’m mostly curious. With all the stories about women cheating and deceiving their partners with their kids, I honestly don’t understand why men still want a family.
As soon as a woman brings up about wanting kids, a man’s trust is suddenly thrown out the window. They ask for a paternity test because they believe their girlfriend/wife cheated.
If your trust has truly dropped, why not end the relationship? Why be with someone you know you’ll never trust?

Updates

2 mo

Let’s say men did stop reproducing with women, wouldn’t that mean the human race would head towards extinction?

[A_Bell]

I don't know what it's like for men, but even though I am in the horrible part of pregnancy, where it's impossible to sleep and your anxiety builds about the imminent due date and all the pain and drama, I know in a few months I will want to start the process again.

It doesn't seem the case for many of my girlfriends, but for me, the drive to have children and just to be pregnant is so high. I suppose men don't have the hormones for that, but perhaps there is a psychological component.

[Anonymous]

The urge to further the species and ones legacy is a strong one. You are talking about a small minority of women, and I mean small minority in relation to the amount of women NOT cheating and deceiving their partners. Also you forget, strangely enough, that its not JUST SOME women who deceive and cheat on their partners, it's men as well who father children or cheat outside of their relationship and that includes some who cheat whilst their partner is still pregnant with their child. In any relationship all you can do is try your best to build a strong foundation, but there are never any guarantees whether you'll have found the one and live happily ever after, or it will be a total disaster, and even if it is a total disaster and she cheats, the kids are not one's SO, and they can still bring that father a tremendous amount of joy and love and happiness which make it worth it for a man.

[OlderAndWiser]

"As soon as a woman brings up about wanting kids, a man’s trust is suddenly thrown out the window. They ask for a paternity test because they believe their girlfriend/wife cheated." This may describe 5% of all men, at most, and perhaps less. You have grossly overgeneralized and you perceive a problem where none exists.

[Asker]

Are you sure that’s all? Because it seems nowadays a good majority of men are keeping up their guard.

[steveusna]

Plus, I have a genetic condition that makes impossible to get a woman pregnant. I have had unprotected sex with women for the last twenty years and never got a woman pregnant.

[Asker]

@steveusna So you’re infertile?

[steveusna]

Yes.

[Berethor]

Most women are untrustworthy these days, but most men don't want to be single and childless. Of course if men stop reproducing with women than humans would go extinct, but even on a smaller scale, their family might go extinct if they don't have children.

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Mama%27s_Baby,_Papa%27s_Maybe

[Asker]

Y’all do whatever you want. Just don’t go crying to anyone once your partner leaves you for accusing them of cheating when they were innocent.

[Asker]

You know what, since trust goes both ways, men should do STD testing. How can your partner trust you when you go out? Seems fair, don’t you think?

[Berethor]

What problem with STD test? only virgins don't need it and don't need a paternity test.

[Asker]

Nowhere did I say virgins. Because that’s obviously a no brainer.

[Berethor]

Before the tests was invented that was the one way to make sure that their no STDs and that the father is really his, why you think that wait until marriage was so important?

[Asker]

Still didn’t stop anyone from cheating.

[Asker]

Also, many people divorce after finding out they were sexually incompatible.

[Avicenna]

Those of us who want to have kids want to have them with the right woman, not just any woman.

[Asker]

Well, of course. That’s a no brainer. But, even if you feel she’s the right one, you would still feel she’ll betray you.

[Avicenna]

No, I would not feel that way

[Asker]

That’s good 😊
Many men would feel that way because of the stories they heard.

[Avicenna]

Paternity fraud is an issue, but it primarily affects the lower socioeconomic classes.

[Apple1996]

Some guys just like having a family. My husband doesn't even care if they are his or not. He tried adopting a kid without me while overseas 😆

[Kelly6]

@Peridot25

It's because now a days men have very less trust in women. Too much has changed and main thing is men are now looking for stay at home wife rather then career wife.

maybe women who have high income job has high chance to get divorce. I won't do this math.

once i read on GaG.

When men get a good job they think to start family.

When women get good job they think to break family so she can climb up on her career ladder.

[Asker]

I work retail and I absolutely hate it! I want to go into veterinary work. Is it truly a bad thing I want to better myself?

[Asker]

If that scares a man, then I don’t want a relationship. Why be stuck where I’m not happy?

[Kelly6]

@Peridot25
it's not bad that you want to get better job,
but if you don't care to try for family and just focus on career then its bad.

[Kelly6]

@Peridot25
you clearly just said it loud, the main sentence of which guys don't want kids.

[Kelly6]

@Peridot25
((If that scares a man, then I don’t want a relationship. Why be stuck where I’m not happy? ))))

this is the answer to your question.

[Asker]

I meant for my job. I’m fucking miserable. My mental health isn’t doing too good and I want to be happy.
I really want a veterinarian job. And all I ask for is for a guy to support me and understand that my well being and happiness comes first.
Do those two things not matter anymore?

[Asker]

I don’t want kids anyway. I wouldn’t be able to handle the responsibility.
I just want to better myself and be happy. That’s all I’m asking for.
If a guy wants me to give up my dreams and put my happiness and well being aside, then I don’t want him. If he wants kids, then he can have them with someone else.

[Kelly6]

@Peridot25
exactly as i said.
if you don't want kids, then why do you care if others want kids.
Do what makes you happy.

[Asker]

I’ll support anyone 100% if they want kids. I never said otherwise.

[Kelly6]

@Peridot25
that is good.

[steveusna]

Support you how exactly?

[Asker]

@steveusna By cheering me on and encourage me to go after what I want. I’m not asking for much.

[TonyMetal___86]

@Kelly6 maybe your analysis is true but since i was a teenager, i always wanted my future wife to be a housewife, never changed mind and never will 😌

[TonyMetal___86]

@Peridot25 you are aware that the world is a lot bigger than what YOU just want...
I do want you to be happy and to be feel healthy for sure and i'll gladly support that, anyone who likes you and cares about you would do this for you but it doesn't have to be the way that you have describe it, you can achieve these by love, marriage and having a family for example...

Also you're bragging about what YOU want, what about what HE wants? If i want a girl just to encourage me and support me just so i become happy and feel good, i'll bring a chearleader, not a wife!

Not wanting kids, well that's your choice, you have to search for a guy who shares with you the same thought...

[Asker]

@TonyMetal___86 Never once I implied I want a partner JUST to make me happy. I’m trying to make myself happy first at the moment. And not once was I bragging. I was only voicing out what I look for in a partner. And hopefully I can find someone like that.
I’m not that selfish. Of course it’s not always going to be all about me.

[TonyMetal___86]

Good to know miss @Peridot25 because making each other happy is the true purpose, also between a married couple in a real marriage, god makes the man and woman become one, which means of he's happy than she's happy and if she's sad than he's sad, that's how it really works!

Love can do miracles, only if it's true love!

When you live in a loving family, you will learn that everyone will care about you, such as when you feel unhealthy or sad, you don't have to do a thing cause your family members will cheer you up and take care of you because if one of the family members was ill and unhappy than the job of the other family members will be to make this family member feels good and happy again, that's why it's called a family because they will all care about each other and make each other happy...

[Anonymous]

"As soon as a woman brings up about wanting kids, a man’s trust is suddenly thrown out the window."

That's not true with the right woman and the right circumstances. The problem is there are far too few of the right women and the right circumstances anymore. There are very good reasons why men don't trust women anymore. Look at the divorce rate (50%). Look at the percentage of divorces that are initiated by women (70% - 80%). Consider the fact that most women still blame that on men and are not willing to take any responsibility for their actions. And consider the fact that men still to this day usually get screwed in divorce court and child custody.

So yes, men still want a family, but fewer and fewer of us are willing to take the risk anymore.

[katiesmuff]

To answer your update first; Yes we would essentially be extinct within 100 years.

I do think the vast majority of men still want a family which includes children and the stories you speak of is a very low percentage of the population. I also agree if you have lost trust of your boyfriend/girlfriend, hubby or wife it's time to call it quits and split.

[BoopBoopBeep]

I'm not a breeder so I can't speak firsthand, but I do have friends who are not childfree. They wanted the kid to do father-daughter/son stuff with. If it doesn't work out with the wife, they still have the kid, which was the desired end result for them to pass on their legacy or whatever. I'm leaving most of my stuff to my rescue kittens or various charities, but I understand that dynasty building is important to a lot of people.

[SolitarySolace]

I have no idea why men still want children those children won’t be his they’ll be hers. Once a man has sex with a woman he ends up giving her total power over him and his future child. Should men even risk it? I don’t believe it’s worth the risk especially these days. But I can’t speak for other men. If they want to attempt to have a family hoping their woman allows for a family where the father is still involved in the home, I will wish him all the luck in the world.

[Asker]

So should we go for extinction then? 🤔

[SolitarySolace]

I don’t know what the way forward should be exactly. Science growing babies outside of a woman’s womb instead of within it? In that case, if things were done that way and we could choose whether to have a boy or a girl, would more people have boys or girls?

[Asker]

Or just adopt. Plenty of girls and boys looking for a home.

[SolitarySolace]

That too but I’m saying more along the lines of if people stopped having sex and babies weren’t being born the natural way

[Asker]

With everything going online and being AI generated, I wouldn’t be surprised we came down to that point.

[JacobJordan]

Human race already is. Their are less children being more now than basically ever before. That being said I wanted kids and the easiest way to ensure I didn't have to deal with the bs was to stay a virgin until I met a virgin. That worked problem solved

[worldscolide]

Its not that we dont trust women.. Its that the system heavily favors them. thankfully most women aren't the evil type that will use a man and then take everything from him.. But its very hard to tell the good ones from the bad ones. I am married for 10 years, almost 11. I married a small town conservative girl.. Its been my experience the more left a woman leans the greater chance she will lie, cheat, and take his family from him.

[JHAYES317]

Ok first of all…a paternity test is like a prenup.. it’s more of a financial safeguard than anything else. Men do not go into those situations thinking that women cheated…but why not be absolutely sure for peace of mind? And because we care about prolonging the human race, as should everyone…though to people that are having more than 4 kids, STOP. Your gene pool is being overproduced…

[TonyMetal___86]

Why do women still want kids these days? 😏

You're just describing negative cases and in such cases, for sure the answer is going to be negative, even though it's happening a lot these days but not all relationships are like this...

In a real relationship where both couple truly love each other, such things doesn't occurs...

Now my answer to your update, well i guess if humans stops reproducing than for sure, it will be just a matter of time before humans go extinct!

[alice55]

Didn't notice they did most just cry about not wanting one, crying about having to pay and not wanting to and asking their girlfriend / wife to abort (usually coercing them or guilt trip them to do it).

[Anonymous]

Here is my answer to that question. If l wanted kids with a woman, she and l would need to adopt.


Because to test her loyalty, if she were to end up pregnant, l would wait until she chose to sue me for child support. Then, and only then, at our court appearance, my lawyer and l would provide proof that in 2004, l had a vasectomy.

[jennifer_bloom]

Your blond and female

[Opinion Owner]

Re-read my post. I AM NOT BLOND, NOR FEMALE.

[PBandJ_Nerd]

I think there are some men that do still want kids. I mean, some men are still looking for marriage so maybe they'd want to find a woman who they'd like as a wife to have their kids.

[Asker]

But, they’ll still be skeptical though.

[PBandJ_Nerd]

Well yeah. you have to be careful with anybody you date.

[thatshydork]

To answer your question in the update, no. There are babies who are conceived via bone marrow. However, at this moment in time our understand of how bone marrow can create babies is so little that many bone marrow babies don’t survive.

[Billlewis]

Although since I'm never allowed to have intercourse with any of the women I serve, I'm looking for a woman who has gotten pregnant by another guy, so I can provide financial support for her and her new baby, and raise the child as my own.

[DarkWinterNights]

Because when you start achieving your financial goals you start to realize it’s all a waste and kids are probably the only real worthwhile goal in life.

[NewgodOmega]

I dont know what kind of fool of a man would want a child that's additional liability, I am extreme mgtow I won't talk to women in real life that Is banned in my life

[Asker]

Whatever, kid 🤷‍♀️

[NewgodOmega]

That profile age is wrong I am 38 little girl

[Asker]

You sure? You don’t act like your age, nor does it say you’re 38 😂 What delulu land did you come from?

[NewgodOmega]

If you don't want to hear options you should rather not post question here, coz someone will see it and they might reply.

[NewgodOmega]

That's your problem, you can die not believing anything I say
You have my permission to die

[Asker]

Oh, thank god. I can finally leave this world in peace now that I have permission. Thank you, sir 😊
Now kindly go fuck yourself. With a cactus.

[NewgodOmega]

I dont have to use abuses to get my point across, maybe you have experience doing that, that's why you tell others to do that, but that's OK you still can leave this world in peace

[Asker]

Good lord, you have problems. No wonder women don’t like you.

[NewgodOmega]

I dont like her either I am extreme mgtow I dont like men women dog alien anything, learn to live with that

[Asker]

Ok 👍

[NewgodOmega]

Live a short and miserable life may devil have your soul

[Asker]

Lucifer having my soul….. kinky 😉

[NewgodOmega]

That's the human imaginary one but if you think it is like that then whatever you want

[Anonymous]

Most men would love to have a family, their own kids with a good wife and mother for their kids. That was the norm in the past. It's not anymore.

I have no interest in raising another man's kids, and I have little stomach for taking on the risks of marriage and fatherhood with what has become the typical woman today.

[LiamJHayden]

"They ask for a paternity test because they believe their girlfriend/wife cheated."

Not necessarily, but if someone is being asked to support another human being for at least 18 years, it is wise to make sure of paternity.

[Asker]

What do you mean not necessarily? That’s the exact reason men want a paternity test.

[strateguy632]

a
to per, he meant if the risk would not be so big he wouldn't test, not suspected she cheated. but due to big expense needs to be certain.

[LiamJHayden]

Nope. Just to preclude the possibility.

[Asker]

Then there’s no need to start a family. Or be in a relationship.