Why would you continue to respond ...

[Anonymous]

Guys,

Why would you continue to remain in contact (however limited), with someone you knew had feelings for you? Someone who sometimes acted irrationally, crazy and desperate for your attention? Someone you knew who made excuses to contact you, even when it was for information they could get from someone else?

If you choose to sometimes respond to this type of person, and on the other hand tell them NOT to contact you, why would you respond to them occasionally vs. ignore? Doesn't that encourage the contact you are asking them to stop?

[Racez]

For me, I just want to maintain our friendship with them. Nothing really good will come out if ignorance is always put first. By being with them and responding to their attention, it lets us get closer to them. And perhaps at some time, attraction will breed between us. Familiarity breeds attraction. The longer a person spends time with each other, an attraction ensues.

Also, it will lets us get closer without any romantic involvement.

[8Oclock]

Uh, that's not really how a female sees it. If you keep responding, in anyway, if is perceived as encouragement for romantic involvement because that is what the female is looking for. It's the same as when a female breaks off with a guy, and...well you see where I'm going with this. It gives a false sense of encouragement, not friendship. In fact, when the truth hits the fan, it hurts.

[Racez]

Yes, I agree with you.

And, a lot of people have different perspective about things. I think how we see people are completely different for us.

[Asker]

8oclock - that's what happened to me, he responded enough I thought I still had a chance, while he was seeing someone else. Even when they moved in, he wanted "distance" only. Later, he still sometimes responds. I wish if he had no desire for a friendship (we are BFFs obviously, I didn't know he was in a relationship) - he would be straightup honest.

[Dekin]

answer: SELFISH

do people deserve to get hurt over something irrational? do scars not tell stories?