Do men really think we have it easy in the dating world?

Question

We have it hard too. If too many men just want a girlfriend to have a great time with, to live together, be romantic with but won't commit and give her kids, we lose right there. That's time and years he would be taking away from us. I've been doing my vetting process for a while now and I haven't had any luck yet.

A woman that can only get a man to have sex with, or be his girlfriend but can't get a man to commit is losing right there. From a biological point of view, we're losing right there. If out of 100 men available, only 5 of them are the types to settle down, then we have it hard in the dating world too.

ProbablyClueless · Accepted Answer

The problem is that men see how little it takes to get rejected by a woman. We're on the receiving end of whatever personal crap the woman is processing through, and when you add on the complete lack of effort so many women put into dating; a lot of the men are just tired of it.

We see it happen all the time: women end up rejecting otherwise great men (by the women's own words) who would give them exactly what they want, so they can go get their hearts ripped out by someone more "fun and exciting."

Women absolutely have their problems in the dating world, but with all due respect, women's dating problems can be solved super easily:

Stop trying to fix people. Bad boys aren't puppies.
Take a few seconds to appreciate the connections you have with people, instead of focusing on what the connections lack.
Actually participate in and contribute to your relationships. I'm not sure why it needs to be explained that men want to feel appreciated.
Learn how to communicate like an adult. Again, I don't understand why this is so difficult.
Stop gossiping with your girlfriends about your relationship.

Women might lose when they don't secure commitment from men. But men lose every second a woman spends flip flopping.

HighValue · Accepted Answer

Women ruined marriage with abuse and theft for generations.

A couple can be committed to each other, exclusive, have kids, etc. Without being legally married.

If a woman wants a good man for an exclusive LTR, she needs to be a good woman too. For example, no past of casual sex, no contact with any ex, no kids from past relationships, no past drug use or heavy alcohol drinking, no posting provocative/revealing pictures online, no flirting with others, no NEW opposite gender friends or sharing relationship details with them so they can intentionally give bad advice to ruin her relationship, and be FAIR to the man in the relationship by not expecting him to bring so much more to the relationship.

If she can manage that, which VERY FEW women can, she should have a relatively easy time finding a good partner.

Something she needs to do though is NOT be with any man that has a past that includes the things I listed too. Avoid men with the same bad qualities that good men avoid in women.

Xoxocutekitty · Accepted Answer

Women have more opportunities to have someone...

- spike your drink
- call you a bitch for not putting out
- call you 'not girlfriend material' for putting out to early
- leak your nudes on social media
- be dishonest about only using you for sex (if it's mutual that's fine, however, many times it's not)
- get assaulted (happens a lot on college campuses)

That said, dating isn't easier for the average man who has to go out of his way to get any female attention. There's just a handful of chads that really ruin it for everyone.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Dating is actually harder for women. Men having low standards is a complete myth. If a woman isn't under 30, slim, attractive, she is invisible to most men. A lot of men aren't even looking for love nowadays, theyre just looking for sex. Not uncommon for a woman to be used by guys just for sex. There is no reason for a man to marry if he can get sex and attention from women as a single guy

Miristheiss · Answer

Yes. In certain areas. Most women can have endless attention, endless suitors, could have sex anytime they wanted but there issue is that the guy the want doesn't want them. 50 other guys may want her but not the one she is after. The guy she is dating won't commit to her or give her a relationship. They always get attention, are pursued, have dating options, are desired sexually, can get sex... etc.

Most men have a harder time getting girls to date them, have fewer options. If they stopped pursuing women, taking chances, flirting, asking out girls, giving girls attention then they'd be 100% alone.

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

Dating friends. You undoubtedly have easier access but that doesn't make finding good men easier. Especially with the sensitivity of you can get pregnant and a man can then leave. Some men can be extremely deceptive with their intentions as well.

However it's way easier for you to meet people for potential relationships and for sex if that's what you want.

I think you genuinely underestimate how difficult things are for a man who isn't exceptional in some regard. The average guy has it absolutely brutal, the average girl has options.

Apple1996 · Answer

It's ridiculously dumb for men to think that. There aren't many good men in the world to choose from. Most men are addicts of some sort, abusers or just act like childern. We usually end up having to settle for a man with one of those terrible qualities

Bricealan · Answer

Consider this: Men don't want to commit for a reason. Relationships seem to be fragile, and marriages can be dissolved in a heartbeat, and long term relationships, followed by marriage and divorce can leave a lifetime of financial hardship, anger, frustration for both parties. My marriage ended in divorce after only a brief period and it took me ten years to recover from the nightmare. I cried in divorce court like a child before a woman judge, and she understood the grief I felt.

I never want to do that again.

Telekinetic-Potato · Answer

There's this woman who I enjoy being around and admire in several ways. I know she wants me to ask her out but she sleeps around too much.

And not like she has one night stands and is just sexually adventurous. She gets into these very short relationships with guys who kinda suck. And even though she's a sweet and loyal woman, I've never seen her demonstrate that she really understands what commitment to another person is or that she wants to be with me or any one guy more than another.

Aside from being a turn off, it just makes me loose interest in something serious.

I want a woman to raise kids with, own a house with and occasionally party with. How am I supposed to want to date you if you have no problem jumping from one deadbeat to the next and then you don't show any effort or stick your neck out at all?

CaptainOverthink · Answer

I think finding a longterm partner and that amounting to something more is just as hard for most.

What men mean when they say "women have it easier in dating" is that men can't just say "yes" and be on their way to the bedchamber. We must be, or seem to be worth something. It's always an uphill battle and most will face a big chunk of their 20s alone and mostly unwanted.

Ofc, this is an oversimplification, womens world is so fundamentally different, we can't really compare. It's not a fair comparison.
We're just jealous because we wish we could just get our sexual affirmation on-demand. But we must work.

CriticalCatDad123 · Answer

Women do have it easy though. Women don't do the asking they wait around for a guy to ask her out. Men have to deal with rejection all the time which makes them less vindictive than women.

Men are getting sick of being used on dates by women who are entitled and condescending.

Politics plays a major part in this too. Men are more conservative and women are more liberal. Which makes it that much more difficult to find someone with shared values.

The Mating Crisis: Why the dating market is doomed - https://youtu. be/txRSxee7gDo? si=WD6o7HRKZtZ93gxY

FunkyMonkee · Answer

ABSOLUTELY!! What's the hard part?
You see a guy that you like and walk over to him (or slink over, if you like) and start chatting him up! With the slightest bit of luck, you'll be boppin' his baloney before the night's over!!
For guys, you see a girl you like, you go over and try to talk with her and she immediately shoots you down!! ICY cold shoulder! You spot another girl you like, you go talk with her she talks but, eventually starts talking about her nubby/boyfriend!! You see another girl you go over and before you can start talking with her, she screams, "RAAAAPPPPE!!!" The next girl tells you to piss off! The next one throws her drink in your face. You finally get to the ugliest girl in the room! Your last hope!! She turns out to be a guy in drag!!

SomothErgai · Answer

The difference is that you have the option of dating a very large volume of men in order to weed out the ones who won't fit the bill. Men do not have that kind of free range on average.

Believe it or not most men want to raise a family too. And they also want to raise that family with the right woman who will be loyal and not be a crazy emotional psychopath.

And yes, we also want to have sex with a lot of women. But that's in the hopes of finding the one who is the best fit.

The problem is the vast majority of men cannot just go show interest in nearly any female and get a date. Whereas women CAN do that. All you have to do is show a little bit of interest, and often not even that, and men will flock to you.

That is, unless there is just something hideously wrong with you like you have 7 eyes or some shit.

When men say women "have it easy" in dating it's because it is literally Infinitely easier for you to get a date than it is for us.

Purpleronnie · Answer

I don’t think that women have it easy , I feel that their struggle to find a partner can be every bit as difficult as man’s albeit maybe for different reasons and I couldn’t possibly comment on why you personally are having difficulties. You’re talking about having kids though and while I understand it adds another complexity for you to perhaps find the right man to discover he then doesn’t want kids , if a guy can’t even find a woman to have the chance of dating then his problems are somewhat more profound… no? Also forgive me for saying but why would you assume that not being able to have children before being middle aged is just a woman’s problem? There are guys out there who would give a testicle or more to be able to have kids as a family

Anonymous · Answer

I think women have it easier. For one women find about 80% of men unattractive. So women are chasing that top % of men. Those top % of men are basically in a candy store. Can pick n eat whatever flavor of candy they want then try something else. These are the men who most likely aren’t going to commit. Women go after these men, a lot of them get treated the same way. Then women end up bitter, saying all men are dogs when a large majority of men have never even gotten a chance at being w a lady. Even the not so best looking girl could get a man to sleep w her if she wanted to. He may not be the cutest but there’s a lot of men who would sleep w her. Her equivalent in a man would never even stand a chance. Women would not sleep w him at all even if he was the most loyalest, loving, dependable man.

DextroShade · Answer

Cry me a fucking river. In a time where most dudes can't even get a date, I have zero sympathy for entitled women who screw up every opportunity they get to have relationships. If you want a guy to take you seriously, you have to be proactive (especially if he's worth a damn). You need to show him that you are good for more than just sex. You can do this by not having contact with previous sexual partners, not posting slutty thirst trap pictures on social media, not going out to bars/clubs or on girls' trips, and not having male "friends", and giving him access to your phone. Domestic skills like cooking and cleaning go a long way as well, if you are the only girl he has over who cleans his place without being asked you will standout.

Also, make sure he's actually looking for a relationship; if he's a young guy with money like a celebrity or athlete he's probably not looking for monogamy.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I'm the type to commit, but I don't want kids, just marriage.

Women have an easier time dating because men do not view women's advances as a reason to report them for harrassment.

Whereas many women nowadays will treat a man like a creep just for saying they are pretty or asking them out.

I've never personally had this problem, as I do not ask out/hit on anyone (because the women tend to hit on me first so I don't have to), but its common enough for guys that I see them complain about it very often.

Despite that, I have an extremely hard time finding a woman who is worth marrying (ie finding a match), there are plenty who liked me that way, but there was always a problem, like they wanted kids, or they were religious, or were in another country, or they didn't share my hobbies and interests, etc etc. So in that respect, I have a harder time dating than most women (and most men).

tzdc21 · Answer

At least you have the privileged of being wanted just for existing. We have to build ourselves up for you to even glance our way. And even then it's not even a fraction of the attention you receive on a daily. I would trade your struggles for mine ANY DAY.

Anonymous · Answer

OK I see we're laying all our cards on the table. OK. Yes, women have it easier because men are talking about the vast majority of women. The majority of women have no intention of finding a man and settling down. At least for anything more than a few seasons. So if you're being honest you're already in the minority. Secondly most women are looking for Chris Hemsworth clone and the bank account to match. That I'm sure you'll never admit to either. I could keep going. But the REALITY is most women do have it easy. The just choose to make it hard. Because she has caviar tastes. And most WILL eventually compromise. But like you wait till AFTER 30 when thier marketability diminishes.

NamerOfStars · Answer

I was going to say "Right, because every woman in the world wants the same thing", but your problems actually run much deeper. Guys don't "take" years from you; very few men in the dating market are temporal wizards. You SPEND years together, but it's your decision; you're not a victim simply because things don't turn out the way you want.

Your life is your own; it does not belong to everyone with more power than you have.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

If you can’t handle dating as a woman, dating as a man would destroy you.
Also, nobody can “take” time from you. You’re spending your time as you choose. He’s a human being who doesn’t live forever too. Do you also feel as though you’re stealing time from the men you don’t commit to? Ell oh ell!
You haven’t settled down because you still relate to the world as a child would. If you want a good man, you’ll have to be a good woman.

DrPepper12 · Answer

Dating! HELL NO!! Trying to weed out the scrubs, the leeches, the dead ends, the cheaters and the zero personalities must be a very very exhausting task.

That said, while dating may be difficult getting laid is so damn easy it's laughable.

Starrrboy · Answer

Most guys think that way just because it's easier for a woman to find someone and she'll always have some value just by existing.. but they're completely missing out that women have way more to lose which makes it harder for them to choose.. reality is that no one have it easier.. you have challenges as a man, and you have risks as a woman.. and if the dating scene is bad, it's because both men and women are terrible lol..

whistlingwh0res · Answer

Women can get sugar daddy easy but then they can’t get date after 30. Men can also get sugar mama but then they can become a gay stripper or gay hooker after they become an adult. So who’s in better condition?

Do men really think we have it easy in the dating world?

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