Should I be Offended if I get called a nerd/dork?

[Cschofield21]

Lately there has been a lot of people at school calling me "nerd" or "dork and most of the time it has been these boy that are my cousins friends. I apologies for what I'm about to say, but these boys are jerks, try hard's, wanna be's, "popular" and have very bad families. These guys have been calling me these names as I'm in a lot of the top class at school and get a lot of A's, due to this they call me these names. Although I most of my friends would consider me to be very athletic as I participate in every sporting activity at school, and quit a few out side of school. What I'm trying to say is that should I be offended by these names or not? As when you get called it a lot, you start to forget the truth and it makes you feel bad about yourself.

[sugarchateau]

I apprehend your emotional and written intelligence, you articulate your thoughts in a very thoughtful manner, that's very impressive.
With that said, I believe you are intelligent enough to decide for yourself if you believe you need to take that label as something personally offensive or not. What lesson do you believe you need to learn or explore by even entertaining thoughts of a label that you chose to perceive as negative?

We forget to start the truth when we seek validation outside of us, which many do, but we do not need to place so much value in what others say about us. No one knows us better than ourselves...

I'd also like to question if perhaps you are trying to be in denial about somebody in that group that is crushing on you, or teasing you in the group? Because you are aware of their bad situations and maybe feel you need to seek more reasons to convince you as to why you need to not like them? I wonder if maybe you recognize a flirty connotation to what they say or maybe sense something beyond what they are saying? But because they choose to say these things to you, you choose to take it negatively because you'd prefer to be in denial of their feelings?

Either way, maybe you feel like you need validation- I'm proud of you for seeking out your needs to meet them for yourself. I feel like you have the ability to choose to embrace a label and make it your own- switch it into something you can view as positive. Perhaps practice coming back with witty lighthearted comebacks that help you stand up for yourself but dont bring them down? Like the next time they call you nerd just be like "it's from all the smarties i've been eating, need some?" and giggle, because you're just trying to have a good day <3

Because remember... you're smarter than them. A person persecuted for their superior skills or intellect are by people who probably fear or envy you. It would be very kind of you to instead seek compassion and try to use your intellect to switch the situation to good, this would be very charismatic and optimistic of you to do... If that is what you want for yourself and those around you, up to you.

[sugarchateau]

we start to forget the truth** ugh. I do this all the time, my bad!

[debi2622]

Never be offended. I remember in grade school on up this one check would always torment me. Not too many years ago at a high school reunion get together, she was there. I walked into the room and she ran up to me, hugged me, and told me she was so happy to see me. Wanted me to sit next to her. She talked about our friendship through school and such. I looked at her and said straight out, you don't remember the bullying and verbal abuse you always hurled at me? She looked at me, with tears in her eyes and said, no. She apologized profusely. Then said her dad was a drunk ad drug addict, that abused her. And apparently she dealt with it by bullying others, namely me. I understood because my own dad was a crap dad. But my point is, you do not know what their lives are like that cause them to be mean to you. Be the bigger person and let it roll off you. Feel sorry for them. But never be offended, as they are just words.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you, I'm sorry that you got bullied :)

[debi2622]

Eh, it happens. All is good. :)

[JackSmy]

I finally got hooked into Game of Thrones. I HATED the dwarf, in the first season, but he seemed to grow, and become a better person, through the series.
He said something, early on, that i think will help you:
“Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.”
– S01E01, “Winter is Coming”
Simply, embrace being the 'Dork' or 'Nerd' and just develop that 'Character' of YOU! If you love it, live it, and embrace it, as Yourself, then how can they hurt you with it?
Use your knowledge, intelligence, as a NERD, and trust in that, and nobody can ever 'make you feel bad' when you know who you really are, and like YOU!

[Cschofield21]

Thanks :)

[4n0nym4us]

First off. I think you're awesome. You get a lot of A's in your classes and you're athletic, I mean how awesome is that? Understand that society has plenty of judges, even more so at your age where the law of immaturity reigns supreme. I used to get called a nerd & dork a lot when I was young and I am... sometimes. I mean I'm a Laboratory Information Systems Analyst, so I do qualify sort of. What I'm getting at is, don't bother caring about when other people try to put you down. You're smart and you have drive, most people don't. You're ahead of the curve in my opinion.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you :)

[AynonOMouse]

Just tell them this:
"You're just jealous because you suck at life and live a pathetic existence. You are a waste of space."
lol
Seriously, tell them that. ^^ *Let me know their reaction if you do say that to them)
And try to realize that no matter what you do in life, there will always be people that don't like or approve of it. Try to live your life in a way that makes you and the people you care about happy and proud, and try not to worry about people that aren't good to you, because their opinions shouldn't matter to you.

[Darjeelingjelly]

Perfect thing to say imho.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you :)

[AynonOMouse]

You're welcome. If you need any other advice just ask. I've worked with kids your age recently and am used to dealing with many of those kinds of issues.

[Cschofield21]

Okay thank you, tha's good to know :)

[Fuentes]

Nah lol sounds like jealousy when you're in a great University getting thay degree or even degree's or even a PHDz whatever you decide to do in the future they'll all be fat and all settled for with whatever came their way still making min wage or a crappy supervisor at a min wage job and a basic regular chick with nothing to offer, while you get to be picky and choosy and have everything you could ever ask for... trust people when they say being that "nerd" pays you off in the long run and never do anything to fit in.. you know who you are deep down so fuck what anyone has to say about you stay in school & work hard and keep them good grades up

[Cschofield21]

Thank you :)

[Egoless_M0rtal]

I mean technically we can't control what makes us feel offended. But just becUse you are smarter then them doesn't mean its bad. And if the repetition of the names is causing you to feel bad it might sound cheesy but tell yourself affirmations during your day. I am smart, i am funny, i am a good person. Thoughts become beliefs and beliefs become actions. I wish i was smart like you when i was in school. Vut make sure you remind yourself that the things they are calling you aren't true. Or you can try to take the effectivness from their words and claim to be a nerd. (Some may argue not to do this) but i found that when i started started to be proud of who i was (even if others saw it as a negative) they slowly started to stop. Because they see its not making me feel bad. But you should never feel bad or offended for who you are especially when its for being smart.

[morimeme1]

You made it pretty clear what you think about them. It is clear that they do it because your success makes them insecure, you have something they do not and it is just part of human psychology - to try to put down something or someone to feel better about yourself. So why would you ever even take someone like that seriously. You should not be offended, you should be sorry for them.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you. Yeh after I had posted this everyone has help me make it clear that I don't care what they say :)

[btbc92]

I say you do. Nerd and dork together are signs of disrespect. You have to learn not to pay attention to those punks and focus on your friends and your livelihood. As long as they don't put their hands on you, or threaten you, ignore the losers. At least you have A's. Many of them have C's and D. I was a C student. But I was also humble for my grades. They're just envious and jealous and want something to complain about. And you shouldn't have to be ashamed of it.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you for this response :)

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I would figure this out people who call us names
don't have a life and are jealous and have a evil
heart these people care for themselves yes it does
hurt us but we need to place a wall to stop these
haters from calling us names and I'm sorry this
is happening to you but your cousins need to start
sticking up for you and put them guys in their place
Best Wishes on this matter :)

[Cschofield21]

Thank you :)

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

You're Welcome :)

[Anonymous]

It's mostly just grade school banter. Ignore the comments and I'm sure they will eventually disappear. I, myself, was on the receiving end of insulting comments. The insults eventually subsided upon finishing high school. You'll meet new people and experience new things as you age, if you're willing to go out into the world and try.

Note: the age listed on my profile is 35 -- I listed my birth date in reference to George Orwell's 1984, though I am 10 years younger than what my profile states.

[Cschofield21]

Okay and thank you :)

[Haelaeix123]

It's the nature of the popular to thrive off the misery if those less so. there's nothing wrong with being a bit nerdy or geeky but in the warped recesses of the void that they claim contains a brain they seem to think its insulting. They might say nerd but all I hear is "so more intelligent than you then?" there's nothing to be ashamed of or offended about. Your great in school and your active, they're just being immature and stupid.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you :)

[Haelaeix123]

Your very welcome 👍

[gorman24]

Nah in fact it is highly probable you will have a more successful career. So let them laugh it up now and let them regret it later in life. Doing well in school shows you have drive and direction unlike the person ridiculing you for it. They probably will be burger flippers and store clerks for a majority of their life.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you and very true :)

[Anonymous]

Let me start out by saying that most stereotypes of nerds and jocks are wrong. Most "jocks" are "nerds". I'd venture to say that almost all jocks, if not all jocks, are nerds. Take sport stats as an example. They will have spreadsheets of their favorite team or even the entire professional league of whatever sport that they like and know the numbers of every last player. You're a lion and they're sheep. They're just following the herd and lions need not value the opinions of sheep. I get it, you're young. At your age words cut deeper than knives, but only if you let them.

[Massageman]

“If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed.”
Adolph Hitler

G'day!
Consider the source of their OPINIONS, and that is just what these comments are: their opinions. Don't take them to heart, replace the names with positive self-talk and thinking.

They are most likely jealous of your success. And people tend to boost their OWN meager egos by suppressing those of others.

Ignore them- you have along life ahead.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you :)

[taleswapper]

You should laugh when they call you a nerd or a dork. They sound like five-year-olds. One of my favorite phrases in cases like this is "And I care what you think why, exactly?"

Being called names by losers is just the bleating of sheep; meaningless noise. Ignore them.

[Cschofield21]

Thanks

[Piteka5]

People this age make fun of whatever they can, you are already ahead of them by putting more effort into studying. Keep it up and you'll see you can get far with relative ease. As you say, you participate in activities and are social, but also have good grades, it's the best of both worlds.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you :)

[Bmories99]

I have been were you are now. Dont let them rile you. Generally people pick on someone when they are jealous of what the person has accomplished. The teasing calling names is to make you feel as bad as they do. Hold your head high. Keeps up with school and have fun playing sports.

[TechLili]

Why would you take nerd or dork as an insult? I honestly don't understand why people get offended by such things. Perhaps they're just messing with you, boys are like that.

[Cschofield21]

Yeh they are :) I understand now that it means nothing :)

[Quidthonian]

You got academic talents which they probably don't. You got the intelligence which they don't. Ignore the insults; concentrate on your studies. Ignore the name calling, they are trying to provoke a reaction from you.
I am proud to be a "nerd". You are welcome to PM me if you want to talk in private.

[ryanrhino]

Nerd is good. Think of the nerds that run the world or are successful. Being called a dork is more of an insult. Dork means fool, nerd means someone who is socially awkward, but not dumb. Check it on wikipedia.

[Cschofield21]

Okay, thanks

[PinkMichae]

If they are calling you a nerd as an insult. I would respond with obviously I'm smarter than you and I'm glad you recognize it.

If they are calling you a dork I'd respond with yes I'm funnier than you. Then thank them for the compliment.

[Cschofield21]

Thank you

[PinkMichae]

You're welcome.

[N192K001]

Nope. Consider it a badge of honor. You seem to be at the top of academic & athletic rubrics. Stay relatable, but don't allow them to drag you down to their level.

Remember this quote: "Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them."

They seem to be working on an outdated model from the Industrialist Revolution. This is the Information Age. Factory-work & manual-labor will only got you so much anymore. Keep striving and excelling. Time will tell who's in the right & wrong path.

[humanearth]

I used to think it was bad when I was young. Now they call me for everything.

Like when they need electricity in the middle of nowhere. Or they need someone to build a radio from razor blade a pencil and a safty pin. (Its called a fox hole radio look it up)

I have I high IQ for inventing stuff with almost nothing. But low IQ for book smarts. Good figure. Super smart one way and dumb as ox in another way.