Guy is lying or telling the truth?

[Anonymous]

At uni, has ZERO friends. He had some friends before but they left uni so now he's all by himself. He barely talks to anyone as a friend. It's all acquaintance kind of chat. He's mostly or almost always alone. He doesn't even know the names of his own coursemates even though he chats with them occasionally.

He claims he has many friends and how he has a "life" outside but it doesn't seem like as his "life outside" is hooking up with random girls he meets at bars or his previous fwbs.
He says contradictory things like he has so many friends but then says he lives in a studio as he has 'isolated himself'.

I caught him once when a guy I know, he was saying he's my friend but the moment I said the guys name, he went like not my friend but I talk to him.
To be honest, I haven't seen him talk to that guy either.

Is he really telling the truth about having many friends or he's just lying and making himself look like he has many friends

[LZPanzer]

Sounds like a typical introvert
Introverts tend to have few friends and don't make a habit of flaunting those they do have. Those friendships also tend to be longer term and stronger. As they value quality over quantity in relationships.

[Asker]

He sleeps around so how's he's an introvert

[the_bruh]

Need more facts to establish it as a lie or truth. What if he plays online games? And his friends are online. If he's lying it's because he's either doesn't like being seen as someone lonely or doesn't want friends.

[Asker]

What about the sleeping around with girls?

[the_bruh]

By what you stated, No. He's not that type.

[Asker]

What do you mean?

[the_bruh]

Sleeping with a woman makes a man feel invincible. If he's hooking up he'd be spending all his time smiling and happy. He sounds more like fighting his own demons.

[Asker]

This is my story with him

I made all efforts for this guy, we got along well, had great date but from 2nd time, he had changed his attitude and had made no efforts for me even before the 1st date. I initiated texts (he never texted on his own), gave open invite to let me know when he's free, ask him if he's warm enough when we were outside I the cold yet this guy stopped replying to my messages and practically ghosted me after briefly meeting me (5 mins) and was pretty cold during it too.

This guy has been seeing other women on and off which i know but he didn't tell me. His colleague did.

Now he's stopped messaging me and I have stopped messaging him as well and deleted all his number, unfollowed him.

However, he's still keeping me in his contact list as his colleague (my friend) saw my name saved in his list.

When he doesn't want to talk, why keep my number? Also I'm frustrated AF. I did everything for this random only to get ghosted. What should I do? Should I block him?

[the_bruh]

He's confused about something, should've asked him about it before ending things. His colleague is trustworthy right?

[Asker]

Confused about what? I asked him to meet up, through text and when I saw him in person, I said the same. He never replied to me but was constantly online talking to others.
Anyone who is a nice guy who is not that type will talk it out. This guy on other hand didn't even seem like he has basic manners. I was talking to a friend and went to him when I saw him but he couldn't even return a message.

[the_bruh]

Maybe try asking him what the fuck is wrong with him.

[Asker]

What do you think about him?

[the_bruh]

I think he has some emotional problems.

[Asker]

What problems?

[the_bruh]

If he doesn't have friends, he's talking about his problems to himself. He has trust issues or he thinks that everyone else is not as intelligent as him. Only he can tell what problem he has. I've never met him, if i did I could tell what his problem is.

[Asker]

He does have trust issues as he said he buys organic meat because he doesn't trust the regular ones. And he doesn't share much about his personal life either. But why remove me from his life? Trust or scared?

[the_bruh]

He probably felt that you'd break his heart. A man with trust issues never take risks.

[Asker]

Wtf but I ve been nice and friendly. And why he's hooking up or meeting girls if he's scared of this?

[Asker]

Also he won't tall or message but still has me saved in his contacts. I don't get him?

[the_bruh]

Have you seen him hooking up? One night stands don't really break your heart do they?

[the_bruh]

Having a number saved in contacts doesn't mean a lot, he might be too lazy to delete it or he might care for you.

[Asker]

Yeah so if he doesn't care and he chose to break off then just delete it?

[Asker]

I ve heard from the colleague that he was/, is zeekng other girls

[the_bruh]

Sorry, I didn't get the notification. Don't believe what the colleague says. You said that he lied to you about having friends outside college. So, it's possible that he lied to his colleague about seeking girls. Only way to know it for sure is making him say it.

[Asker]

But he himself said he went with a female friend to have lunch, he was going to her house who has a "boyfriend" then was also checking out another girl in front of me who was wearing a crop top but said he's only mentioning her because he saw her on the bus and that he's not a creep.

[Asker]

And now he doesn't talk to me. All he does is keep my number in his contacts and whatsapp but no message, no reaching out.

[the_bruh]

As far as you've told me. He's probably lying about everything. He's just testing how jealous you can get. Next time ask him about this girl and how her character is. He'll probably make up a girl in his mind, keep questioning about it and if he's lying you'll know.

[Asker]

But he's not even messaging me? I told him to meet me if he's free. He never replied and hasn't initiated any contact either

[the_bruh]

Give him time.

[Asker]

Time? But it's almost three weeks and he isn't even wishing me merry Christmas etc?

[the_bruh]

Oh, ask him if something is wrong and that if he needs someone to talk to he can to you.

[the_bruh]

I'd be careful if I were you though he sounds a lot toxic. He needs repair

[Asker]

I can ask bit I'm certain he won't reply. So I stopped messaging him. He hasn't messaged me either. But he hasn't deleted me off his whatsapp as his last seen is only visible to his contacts snd I can see his last seen

[Asker]

He needs repair and toxic? But you said he doesn't seem like he sleeps around?
Also why mention female friends?

[the_bruh]

If he's a person who sleeps around, he would develop a self awareness that he can sleep with any girl he wants. So, he'll be well skilled with girls like the way he talks, moves, and even his eye contact. And he would sleep with any new women he meets.

[the_bruh]

Yeah, for a girl to be in a relationship with this guy would make her feel like she's doing everything wrong and makes her feel like shit. Anything she does is never enough. Unless the girl realises his problems and knows how to fix it.

[Asker]

But wjy did he stop messaging? Everything was great until he started behaving oddly

[Asker]

What do you think his problem is?

[the_bruh]

Trauma of some sort. Need to know more about him to pinpoint to which is actually causing him problems. Talking to him can make a lot of difference

[the_bruh]

While you were on talking terms with him, did you speak to other guys in front of him and stuff?

[Asker]

No I never mentioned any guy. He on the other hand mentioned three times. Two of his female friends snd then randomly looking at another girl saying how he saw her on the bus with her parents and how he's not a creep, just mentioning how she's also german

[Asker]

He's the only child and I think his parents aren't together as they both live in different countries. He also doesn't seem very close to them and rarely goes to see them. He kept saying he was happy as an only child and he's used to living on his own/independently but I actually doubt it

[the_bruh]

He's probably thinks that relationships are bad and being alone is the best. When he feels hopeful he tries to get in a relationship. But loses it when something triggers him.

[Asker]

But will he ever get back to me? I really liked spending time with him, both of us had a lot in common and I found him cute too. But he just checked me out ( chest, bottom and legs even though I was fully dressed except I was wearing sheer tights when he was looking at my legs) , googled me and looked dead my social media peptides and after 2 dates (2nd one wasn't a date though he just came to meet up) ams then disappeared

[the_bruh]

Maybe, if something pushes him to think of you and makes him feel like he should date you. Yes, he will

[Asker]

I want to block him tbh. I don't know what game je plays. River since I sent him a message, he plays the last seen game on whatsapp. He didn't add me in his contacts first so he made his last seen public for everyone. And on some days he would last appear at 19.20 pm and be gone the whole evening+night.
Then he added me in his contacts and closed his last seen for everybody except his contacts.
He stopped disappearing for long hours for 1 week but now has again started doing it.

I dont know what he does but I think he goes to get laid with that "female friend with a boyfriend" he was talking about.

[the_bruh]

Maybe, but he could be doing something else like doing some charity work or social work.

[Asker]

No he isn't. Why do you think he's so innocent?

[the_bruh]

I don't think he's innocent, I think he's lying.

[Asker]

Lying about what? But why do you think he's gone from whatsapp? He's also mentioned this female friend and even rhe colleague said he was seeing someone

[the_bruh]

If he was seeing someone wouldn't he be more active on social media to talk to her? He's lying to hide something, maybe he feels like his life is miserable and wants to hide himself from people seeing the real him.

[Asker]

Yes but he's active on whatsapp and often he's gone for hours and even overnight. So doesn't that mean he's talking to her or staying with her?

[the_bruh]

Probably, he could also be playing video games.

[Asker]

Why do you think he's not a creep though?

[the_bruh]

Because you never said you were uncomfortable around him?

[Asker]

I wasn't because I liked him but I did say he was looking at my chest, bottom and legs wnd then he was so looking over the girl wearing the crop top and making up the story which you felt was to make me jealous

[the_bruh]

Yeah, forgot about that. He sounds like a piece of shit now. You'll find someone better, he's not your problem unless you make it. Better to have a piece of mind rather than worrying if your partner is out cheating.

[Asker]

Do you think he just wants sex? Because we had so much in common, yet he has no regard for the common beliefs and clear communication.
Also why is still keeping my number?

[the_bruh]

Most probably. I think he isn't well experienced on how to communicate or express his feelings. He keeps your number because you have or had a influence on his thoughts, maybe he likes you. If he was looking for sex from you he would've hit on you by now.

[Asker]

But thus guy has always made 0 efforts himself except staring at ke and I had to initiate everything. Maybe he expects me to seduce him? And rhen he felt he wasn't getting what he wanted, he quit?

[the_bruh]

That's a possibility too.

[spartan55]

Well unless you follow him around and never lose sight of him (which it sounds like you might) 24/7 then you don't know. And you shouldn't act like you do know.